Conquest
Member
- Joined
- Apr 27, 2022
Hey guys, this here is my Approach Anxiety Log.
I started this a few weeks back and had to drop it as tax season became overwhelming, but now there are no excuses.
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Insights from Days 1-3
I was very nervous overall the idea of speaking to girls was terrifying, and I felt like I was bothering them. I took my watch off to avoid looking stupid asking for the time. The first drill was a big day for me I remember, as it was the first step towards reclaming my social freedom.
I had a great high off this social freedom, talked to whoever I wanted, and avoided asking for permission and instead doing as I pleased in small instances (avoiding the long line for checking receipt when I had three carryout items, asking for discounts on purchases, exaggerated reactions to speeding cars).
Right before I took hiatus I told some girl on my old campus she was cute and asked for her number. SHe offered social media as conselation and I refused. But I was on top of the moon having the balls to do so.
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4 weeks later, I picked up from Drill 4/Day 7, and repeated it twice.
Standard reactions, quite a few girls keep walking as I ask for time and directions, looking nervous and not wanting to stop. Getting better reactions on college campus though.
Today I noticed people in the mall staring at me and calling me weirdo, or "the weird guy asking for directions." This is really getting to me.
Since college (17) where I would walk around campus alone mostly, I have had a longstanding fear of being called weird or weirdo. Yet I would not want to avoid standing out for the sake of being "normal."
I'm not sure what to make of this entirely, but my issue with seeking validation from strangers, or wanting to not be seen as weird is coming to surface. It would mean the world to me to eventually not care what strangers think of me.
I started this a few weeks back and had to drop it as tax season became overwhelming, but now there are no excuses.
---
Insights from Days 1-3
I was very nervous overall the idea of speaking to girls was terrifying, and I felt like I was bothering them. I took my watch off to avoid looking stupid asking for the time. The first drill was a big day for me I remember, as it was the first step towards reclaming my social freedom.
I had a great high off this social freedom, talked to whoever I wanted, and avoided asking for permission and instead doing as I pleased in small instances (avoiding the long line for checking receipt when I had three carryout items, asking for discounts on purchases, exaggerated reactions to speeding cars).
Right before I took hiatus I told some girl on my old campus she was cute and asked for her number. SHe offered social media as conselation and I refused. But I was on top of the moon having the balls to do so.
----
4 weeks later, I picked up from Drill 4/Day 7, and repeated it twice.
Standard reactions, quite a few girls keep walking as I ask for time and directions, looking nervous and not wanting to stop. Getting better reactions on college campus though.
Today I noticed people in the mall staring at me and calling me weirdo, or "the weird guy asking for directions." This is really getting to me.
Since college (17) where I would walk around campus alone mostly, I have had a longstanding fear of being called weird or weirdo. Yet I would not want to avoid standing out for the sake of being "normal."
I'm not sure what to make of this entirely, but my issue with seeking validation from strangers, or wanting to not be seen as weird is coming to surface. It would mean the world to me to eventually not care what strangers think of me.