Day 1: Monday

[Monkeyfireking]

So, my #1 goal is to stick to this schedule I set out for myself. I thought this out pretty thoroughly, and I plan to stick to it. I will use this progress log forum to keep myself accountable to make sure that I am following through with my #1 goal and to have something to look back upon to appreciate my journey more.

So here is my rough schedule (I will likely copy paste for future days to check adherence):

MON - THURS
9:15 AM – 9:45 AM: MR (up, brush and shower, moisturize, put on forte, contact, cloths and food, out the door)
9: 45 AM – 10: 45 AM: Drive
10: 45 AM - 6:30 PM:
On Campus (in order of priority)
-SympTracker (Have to note since required by university)
-Classes
-Ind Study*** (As many pomodoro as possible)
-Socialize: Talk to someone and try to develop closeness
-Meal and Walk
-Update log
6:45 PM – 7:45 PM: Drive
8 PM – 11:30 PM: Train***
12 AM: NR (frozen bananas / other fruit and PB, minoxidil beard, floss, brush, wash feet)
12:15 AM – 9:15 AM: Sleep

FRI
9:15 AM – 9:45 AM: MR
9: 45 AM – 10: 00 AM: Drive
10: 00 AM - 5:00 PM: Library:
-Classes
-Ind Study***
-Walk
-Meals
-Talk 1 new person
-Update log
5:15 PM – 5:30 PM: Drive
5:30 PM – 7:00 PM: Meal at home / in public building
7 PM – 11:30 PM: Walk to digest, Train***, Cardio
12 AM: NR
12:15 AM – 9:15 AM: Sleep

SAT: Prep for the week day
9:15 AM – 9:45 AM: MR
9: 45 AM – 10:45 AM: Walk
10:45 AM - 3:00 PM: Meal and Meal Prep, Cloths for the week prep
3 PM – 6:30 PM: Home:
-Study***
-Walk
-Update log
7 PM – 11:00 PM: Train***
12 AM: NR
12:15 AM – 9:15 AM: Sleep

SUN
9:15 AM – 9:45 AM: MR
9:45 AM – 10 AM: Drive
10 AM – 6:30 PM: Library:
-Ind Study***
-Walk
-Meal
-Update log
6:30 PM – 7:00 PM: Driving
7 PM – 11:00 PM: Training
12 AM: NR
12:15 AM – 9:15 AM: Sleep


Notes for today:

It's amazing how different my day can be. Going into a big open environment that is conducive to me achieving my goals is key. The dingy environment of my home can feel like a death sentence. Today, I felt a need to stay away from my phone. In particular, I stopped constantly having something playing in my ear and got in tune with the world around me. I remember in the shower this morning, I had this pang of tiredness due to adjusting to this new sleep schedule, and the pain reminded me of my mortality. I saw that feeling as a challenge that would make me stronger and getting through it would bring me closer to victory. I endured on the path I set out for myself today, I got my productive work done today, and I have so much more energy and resolve compared to this morning. Suffice it to say if the rest of this semester can be like this, I will be having a good time. This silent work that I am putting in is therapeutic and can be likened to the weightlifting I’m so used to. Rather than seeing the silence as something I could replace with something better, I want to view it as something beneficial. I didn’t even have to go all the way either. I still have my phone by me and just haven’t used it to distract myself from what I need to be doing, and I’m still going to listen to music at the gym.

I spent some time talking with a buddy of mine from high school at his apartment today and that did wonders to rejuvenate me the independent studying I did today (got 4 pomodoro worth of focused work today plus my 2 lectures). I find conversations I have with people in person at school keep my mood elevated, and I will be more likely to work harder and longer academically.

Today went all as planned. Just need to train, do my night routine and get in bed on time for tomorrow.

 

[Monkeyfireking]

Andy gives me permission to suck. So, let's begin!

I was inspired by MakingAComeback’s log. Seeing his consistency and his growth inspired me to get after my life too.

I used to wear earplugs in public. But, now I am actively forcing myself to go without them. I’m treating this as training to be more comfortable in my own skin in the “real world”. I feel disconnected and anxious sometimes constantly having them on. In order to think my own thoughts and be my own person I actually have to give myself time to do my own thinking, which I think requires immersing myself in the world around me rather than trying to escape it.

The stillness and “boredom” that comes helps me be more interested in my school work and I find it has been much easier to get work done. I got five pomodoro and a lecture done today plus a lecture (unlikely to be repeated on future weekdays though with added classes).

This week I will have to get a feel for everything. I will likely make changes to the schedule with more experiences in the trenches. For example, my big prep day for food (Saturday) will need to be more extensive. Had an impromptu breakfast of canned tuna and lettuce and celery so need to add breakfast prep on that day. Also, I need a meal after my nighttime training (I get to reward myself with podcasts then and wind down for the day preparing for bed). It’s a nice highlight of each my days. Training and then eating, rewarding myself after I got the major work done for the day.

My training split is upper, lower, arm focus, rest (focus on improving style day or school work or anything else that needs addresing), repeat. On one of these days, and I want to learn how to hem, which I feel will make a big difference on my style since I’m 5’5 with a short torso. Man, I really feel on top of things and I’m glad to get these thoughts out. The highlight and enjoying myself part of the day is the training (listen to music then) and meal at the end of the day. Otherwise, no earphones.

Waves of tiredness / negative emotions in the car and shower in the morning. How to address? Probably due to adjusting to sleep schedule. If this persists in the future, there has to be some way to reduce the feeling. Environment really is key. I need to remember this moving forward. Later in the day, I felt so much better being on campus and getting work done there. I am in an upstairs area with other people, and this environment is much more conducive to getting work done.

I’m not going to note everything that happened and all my thoughts. There are some private thoughts and things that I am hesitate to share since I don’t know who will read this. But, I will try to disclose things that I am willing to share and have this log here since I will be more likely to stick with it since I feel like someone is watching me and keeping me accountable. I’ve tried private logs in the past and I slip up on adherence on those.

Note on #1 goal:
All the puzzle pieces have to fit together in my process to achieve my #1 goal / priority. For example, driving is no more important than my training but I have to drive to get to the training. But, the focus is getting the training done. Not the driving. My heavy sets are more important than my warm ups and they are what really matter. They probably account for a few minutes in total in comparison to the 2 hours total in a workout. But, you have to work through the warm ups to get to the top sets. My #1 priority at the moment is independent study since I really need to address it (I slacked too much last two semesters). A prerequisite to staying productive I feel is interacting enough with people so I don't become depressed, spending lots of time in environments that are conducive to independent work, and doing what I can to make myself comfortable in them. I've got the training side of things covered and I'm placing it as a reward at the end of each day. What I need to focus on this year is the working and productive side of things.

-“this is the world we live in” lyrics to which song?
-give myself freedom with these notes. When take them on the computer I am not all pent up and “speak” what I needed to say. Give me practice using my own thought process too. I’m able to this all by keeping away from my phone.

Wearing a necklace from berserk for the first time. I thought it was a cliché and douchey thing to wear at first but after a while, I am really liking it. It actually means something to me, and it changes how I think people view me. On the geeky side of things, Broly from dbz had one. Heck, even Riley from pokemon (loved his character design growing up). So, its okay that I can wear it too. Badass characters from childhood. Got some stan smiths recommended by Radical’s guide as well, and they remind me of the Muhammad ali boxing shoes.

Yesterday, I spent some time talking in person with an old friend of mine. It felt really nice. Today, I had a call with Juhboi, and it felt wholesome to connect with him as well. I can appreciate having close relationships and being productive much more now than that I know what it is like to feel lonely and to be reverting backwards in life doing nothing. I reclused myself too much last year. I must not go backwards and forget what I have learned.

I wish I could read the the “inner world” of more people that I know. Whenever certain people reveal such things about themselves, I really like it for some reason.

I’m looking forward to my meal in the game room on campus and my meal at night after a great cardio session.
Naturally, this schedule is going to get me leaner. I just need to adhere to it. I get these “summer” vibes while in a caloric deficit and it feels bittersweet. Bulked for 1 year + and I am so ready to get some body fat off of me. I earned this cut.

When in the car, I used to force myself to speak out loud to get better at talking. Now, I allow myself to think in empty silence or practice being okay with the silence. I think this is going to ultimately in the end be better prepare me for my conduct in real life. I think its almost like a superpower being someone who is comfortable in their own skin without needing earphone or a phone to distact themselves.

Music during my training will sound so much better and affect me that much more each night when I force myself to have no earphones the entire day prior. I remember my first set last night I was so fired up.
Songs that I want to listen to tonight: Finish line skillet

I’ve been wearing this stretcher on me for two days in a row now. It comes at a cost of comfort but worth it in the long run. This something I want to incorporate into my process.

Need out the door checklist. Checklist for big prep day on Saturday as well.

Checklist for end of each day (bottom line):
Did you make time for… (in order of priority)
-independent focused work and (Priority #1)
-Training in
-sticking to the diet
-sleeping enough
-“Stretching”
-self-care (style, teeth, etc.)
-Interacting with someone

I want to get ahead in my classes. And then when I get ahead in my classes, I want to get even further ahead making plans for the summer (job / internship). Don't want to be left at home doing nothing.

-Hoping to update my progress each day after I finish my study sessions and before I wind down for the day (before training, meal and sleep). Probably won’t be as long as this in the future though since I will be needing to be spending more time in the trenches of life.

 

[Monkeyfireking]

Its all about my systems. Trianing system. Schedule System. Meal Plan System. Night and morning routine systems. Etc. etc.

Frustrated this morning. Was spending too much time trying to find my one tanktop that looks good on me. Couldn’t find it. But, I turned the negative into a positive. This was a wake-up call that I need to up my clothing so that I’m not doing laundry multiple times per week and I don’t run into this problem again.
Today, tomorrow and Thursday, I have the luxury of not having to go to campus.

Went for a walk in the woods. The weather was beautifu. Nice clear blue skies, mild temperature, and nice crisp air. Ideal environments like these when I have the opportunity to take them I should take. Don’t want to fall in the trap of not doing something just because I can’t get it consistently. The scarcity is what makes me cherish it all the more.

My training is down and pat. I’ve been consistent with systems I set out to do and adhered to them. They are flexible enough to keep things fun, but rigid enough to produce results. That’s why I’ve placed them at the end of the day as a reward. Really looking forward to end of each day after I’ve got all this independent work done, and can enjoy good music while training, a steam in the steam room, and a good meal afterwards with an entertaining podcast. That’s how I want to live out my days this semster.

But, in order to get to those rewards, I have to get the work done. Today, is a test to see if I can accomplish that. To see if I can get the work done despite the environment. I think about my future for example. What if I don’t have access to a gym? I will find a way through a greater focus on calisthenics (Rings, advanced variations, high volume and frequency) and more cardio. Done deal. Training intact. My environment does not define me. I am not defined by it.

Tonight I want to listen to: Back from the dead tonight – skillet and Sound of silence
Bought mechanical pencils and 2 black t shirts (reminder to learn how to hem)
Pimple on cheek probably due to oil I ate.

Random thoughts throughout the day:

-Nice and happy after a healthy meal of vegetables and lean protein. Luxuries like showers keep me in the game.

-Damn, I’m having a really good time. I should have done this sooner. Better now than even later!

-Its harder to avoid listening to something at home. Its much more quiet when I’m alone. But, it’s still doable.

-Lyrics to a song Johnny Cash- “I would keep myself” “I would find a way”  sobering song

-Hard to concentrate. Response: got up and moved around. Got a hot beverage (hot carob drink) (probably won’t do it again) (would not recommend)

-The plan means nothing without the execution.

-Feeling frustrated not everything is going as well as I want. Spending so much time on things that should be done faster. But, I undeterstand that this frustration is a barrier that separates the resigned future regreter from the struggler, the one who will go the distance and reach the end.

-Wave of energy later at night all of a sudden. Was more tired working while standing up. I am getting so much more work done on a more lazy position on the couch. Weird, thought it would be the other way around. What matters is getting the work done and that means getting in a comfortable position.

-Don’t get stuck in these rabbit hole assignments / Don’t major in the minors. Keep the big picture and mind and get my bases covered first. Training analogy: get the compounds in before the isolations.

-Some might consider it lame / avoidant that my goal is school (at least priority for this semester) (especially considering this forum lol). But, it truly means a lot to me to end up proud of the work that I put in. I don’t consider it a failure if I don’t do well. as long as I put in a genuine effort into my work and set it as a priority everyday. But, I do consider it a failure if I do not prioritize my work or if I get my work done at great expense of my training, diet, sleep, or sanity.

End:
-Priority #1: Frustrated that I only got a lecture and 2 50 min pomodoro done today. Better than last semester for sure but could have done better for this particular day. I got caught up in cooking, walking, laundry, and looking for lost clothes (things that could be addressed all on one day, for me: Saturday)

-Nonetheless, going to wind down: train, eat, and get to bed.

-Still motivated to keep moving forward!

 

[Monkeyfireking]

Songs that ran through my head today (all bangers):
- High School Never Ends – “and the only thing that matters is climbing up that social ladder”
- It has begun – Star Set
- High School Musical “Got to get it to get it together” “the boys are back”
- Timberlake “Sexy back”
- It could have been me

-After veering off my schedule these last two days, I’m switching my #1 goal from sticking to the schedule to covering my priorities (this is what I really cared about really). Each day, I consider it a success if I (keeping it somewhat broad and in order of importance)…

1. Get work done / do something to set up for the future careerwise
2. Get the training in + PE, Stick to the diet, Get a reasonable amount of sleep
3. Limit earphone to the end of the day after work is done
5. Document and Update State of Mind and Progress on Forum
6. Adhere to MR and NR (built in self-care habits)

-I’m going to do this oonga boonga style as Bald Omni Man says. As long as I get it done, I’m good. By any means necessary. This is the plan moving forward.

-Everything else that I want to work on after is optional after I get my priorities covered: improve my style, hang out with friends / talk to new people I want to meet

Thoughts throughout the day…
-On any given day, I may be veering off the straight path to my achieving my goals. Even if I am trying best to stay on it. It can be disheartening and frustrating to realize that I took a large detour. The important thing for me to remember is the the best thing for me to do is to catch myself before I veer off too far and get back on the forward path. That’s how I plan to get to things done.

-Bothersome physical things that can be fixed but don’t go away right away that mess with my confidence and that I want to address (in order of how much I care): cheek fat, acne and wrinkles (skin quality), clothes that don’t fit or look quite right, unaesthetic body propotions such as thinner limbs relative to torso thickness. Down the line that worries me somewhat that I want to handle as well: dealing with losing head hair, bad health markers, down the line cancer and other fatal disease.

-Mental impediments that make me want to escape by numbing my mind through YouTube (my personal addiction) and eating food unecessarily: brainfog and difficulty focusing, low energy, low mood, negative emotions.

 

[MakingAComeback]

LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!