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Living the dream/ Phase 1 - The first crossroads

Slept way better.
Copwriting and workout done.
Cardio in the morning then workout and Interview prep tomorrow eve.
Work and interview Friday. Cardio in the eve then off hiking the alps for two weeks.

I have some good goals to attack when I'm back.
I'm not gonna finish the course before I leave but have kept the same pace working through it. I'll finish the theory part and can start the practice assignments after holiday.
 
Interview went well.
Won't get my hopes up too much as the competition may be strong.
One more workout to do before my holiday.
 
Almost completed the tour du mont Blanc, someone died on our route falling through the snow so we're calling it and chilling in town.
Was a blast and made some good friends (a fire cheif, a therapist and a project manager from Detroit as well as a Dutch kickboxing couple). Getting some looks from the women here as they probably haven't seen anyone as big as me before haha.

Summer 23
I have a lot of goals and a to-do list but I won't bother posting them until I take action towards them - watched one of Andy's podcasts and I'm definitely guilty of talking about what I'd like to do as a way of wanking off but then not taking proportionate action.
 
Approaches in Chamonix France:
1. Said bonjour, she said bonjour back, bottled it and kept moving.
2. Paced around for ages, went to the bus station, French lady asked if I knew where the train station was I told her and she left.
3. Saw a pretty lady stood around - felt way easier than stopping people. I go up:
Bonjour, Parlez vous anglais? She sais yes. I say she looks great today.
Pause, flattered thank you she seems taken aback in a really nice feminin way. I say have a nice day she sais you too then I eject.
3.5 milf dresses me down with her eyes as I'm walking past - I freeze up smile and keep walking past
4. Try to stop a pretty Arabic girl walking into town. Bonjour she responds but doesn't break step and clearly want to keep moving, and she's gone before I say anything else.

I think I'm getting some looks, still dressed for hiking and about to catch bus to geneva.

Got stoned with some dude from detroit the other night and still feeling super introspective. I actually broke the daygame cold approach barrier a little bit today.
Walking up. mountains has taught me the value of baby steps and I feel unforfilled with my current self.
Also when I was high I got punched in the face with the realisation I'm putting all my desire for sex on one fb and then get annoyed when she doesn't give it to me lol. I also tripped because she probably could control me just using sex which I am not cool with. Maybe it's paranoia but it's no secret she's trying to get me to commit and without options I simply cannot be happy.

Will do approaches in the capital of Switzerland- Bern tomorrow.

I have one attractive fb. I can play the numbers game and multiply this
 
Geneva approaches:
Friend was ill so I went out into town.
1. Went into a pharmacy asked the receptionist where I could find a phone charger.
2. Talked to a good looking couple of women probs in their 30s asked so same question, they were really pleasant and happy to help.
3 attractive black women asked me for directions, I had no idea but used ot as a chance to loosen up.
3. First proper approach. Asked if she spoke english- she was Canadian. Said she looked really good, she was really flattered said her fiance was with her, talked about my holiday and what she was doing in Switzerland then moved on.
Missed a really hot girl sat by a fountain, mustered up the courage to approach just as she left walking away from me.
4. Walked around for ages. Approached another girl sat down, she was very pretty, spoke English, I gave her the same compliment, asked for her name talked a bit - she was on her coffee break. Super nice girl, again seemed really flattered.
I ejected too early - I could have probably sat next to her and talked some more.
5. Walked down to the lake, did the same approach on another pretty girl sat down. She only spoke a little bit of English, but seemed really taken aback in a really nice way. Had to go to the train station as my mate has recovered. Kind of awkwardly bumble off lol. Could see her beaming as I walked away.
6. Thought I'd try to stop a moving target - two girls both hot, asked where the train station was, there was a bit of friction but they showed me the way. I said thanks and bounced.

Beautiful city, loads of hot women, I really want the ability to talk to hot girls in person. I'm getting less nervous already and breaking down the barrier. I think a good progression after my compliment, name exchange will be to ask about the city then propose an insta-date.

What's pushing me over the line to approach right now is sadness. I feel my time with fb is coming to an end.
When I was high I realised I had formed an unhealthy attachment to her again amd I don't think I can be happy with a woman if I don't have options.
Options I don't have through my own negligence
We spoke last night and she said she just feels numb with life, including seeing me. A couple months ago she was saying she loves me and now it's indifference.
Spent the morning in my hotel room watching porn, having an existential crisis and feeling sorry for my self.
(I still feel weird from this French weed but it's been very beneficial)

Thats my third day ever trying to 'day game' and it feels really good. I'd describe the women I've spoken to here really pleasant and classy. They're also half naked as it's summer.
 
Flying back to UK.

I've taken some action so will post more goals.
This summer I've written a big to-do list of progressively harder goals.

This week: (ED stands for every day)
[  ] Tidy room
[  ] Go to barbers
[  ] Book laser rejuvenation therapy at derma - Fotona.
Consult about Dermal fillers
[  ] Jawserciser 10mins ED
[  ] Add vit c, e, niacinamide, Hyaluronic acid, copper peptides to skincare routine
[  ] 1 serving veg daily
[  ] Add DHA
[  ] Red light therapy mindfulness meditation, Ohms 20mins ED
[  ] Add bracelets, watch and rings
[  ] Eat food in 6hr window
[  ] 30 mins cardio EOD
[  ] PE EOD
[ ] Restock nizarol, dht blocking conditioner and peptides
[ ] Run mini 4 week blast to regain physique

Money:
Finish copywriting course

Women:
5 approaches Saturday and Sunday
1 approach at a meetup group on Saturday
50 swipes a day - starting slow on tinder
Use all bumble swipes
 
Flight got cancelled but got to spend the night at a hilton hotel for free.

Spoke to a girl in the lift - just happened randomly, hopefully I'm forming this as a new habit.
Talked about my holiday, she was very receptive, I had to get out on my floor but she actually stood in the lift doorway talking a bit more.

Also spoke to a couple who had the same flight cancelled while we were eating dinner.
People are very closed off in the UK by comparison and spending time abroad has really opened my eyes to how easy it can be to just start talking to strangers.

Good signs for sure.
Not sure what time I'll get back to the UK today but will try and get down to the barbers, meal prep and get to the gym.
 
So I didn't get the secondment opportunity but I did really well in the interview so was recommended for another position that I will interview for. It seems like I was actually close to doubling my salary haha. This new role is still a big step up and they've put a good word in for me and actually asked me to apply for it which is really cool.

Hit a PE pr out of nowhere probably due to the deconditioning break of going on holiday.

Went to barbers and gym after work. Restocked hair maintenance stack and back on my healthy diet.

Not gonna lie I was looking at myself in the barber shop mirror after 2 nights of minimal sleep like how the fuck am I getting good reactions from women.

Hit my OD numbers, feels good. I'll post some newer photos for feedback and start running boosts again towards the weekend.
 
Got confirmation today the only thing stopping me from getting the first role was the fact that the company didn't want to double my salary out of nowhere.
Went to speak to the interviewer informally for the new role I've been tipped off to apply for to ask questions, show I'm serious and generally ingratiate myself.
Interview is on Monday

These are the type of elite actions I need to be doing every day to move my life forwards.

Consulted a dermatologist today, they recommended I speak to an expert about dermal fillers to get the type of rejuvenation I'm looking for. Consultations on Thursday.

Hit my OD numbers.
Did more PE
Seeing FB tomorrow
Added beetroot juice to my diet.
Did 30mins cardio.
10 mins jawserciser
Diet healthy and defecit maintained
 
Ended it with FB.

So she's got some health problems and is on medication that has tanked her hormones killing her libido.
Obviously this has ground us to a halt and we both agreed we have nothing in common.

I'm excited about this
I was coasting having easy access to sex and when it stopped it caused a lot of tension. I made the mistake of coming over just to talk and chill out like friends and I think the breakdown of boundaries contributed to killing the vibe.
She also said she want to 'find herself' and needs something new.

The red pill:
Ive talked about in my log how she was pushing for something more serious and how I was uncomfortable with this.
I'm happy with my decision.
She's a lot of fun but needs constant stimulation and novelty and basically said as much.
I do feel like I was wrong of her to try and start something serious with me knowing how chaotic and attention chasing she is.

But it also means this hot thrill-seeking woman actually just wanted to fuck me and this drove all her emotions towards me that she mistook for love.

Maybe I'm more Chad than I thought.

It's been a blast. My first lay leading to loads of great sex, pretty heavy emotions and fixed my ED.

Now I have to push myself
 
Felt real melancholy today
Just couldn't get fb out of my head, I connect too strong from sex. Kept waking up last night from too much caffeine and had a suffocating feeling that I wouldn't sleep with her again.

So I saw an escort, she was very petite and I think she actually orgasmed from sex. Also really eyed up my body and did a lot of extra lustful stuff that I didn't expect but really appreciated like giving me the side eye when I took my top off. I'm also having a size issue where she got really sore fast which is probably quite a drawback for her in her line of work.
Was fun and will keep me even keeled.
It actually got rid of my butthurt oneitis feelings.
I also appreciate this is something I couldn't do last year because of Ed and now my body just responds and I can trust it and be confident.

Once I finished it calmed the test fueled haze I was in and I want to get back to forming positive connections with women without being scared of rejection or feeling like I have to simp for sex.

I went out with my mate and new years girl after. She was super flirty again and now has got over her ex so I can fuck her without the drama and baggage.
I'll do this at some point.

I'm also so grateful that hot girl in geneva responded really well to my approach.

Gonna plan my birthday next Saturday. Got my interview Monday and consult about dermal fillers Wednesday.
Diet and physique going well as always.
Backed of the tretinoin for a couple days as my skins kinda red and irritated.

I think my hairline has actually marginally improved from my hairloss prevetion stack.
I wish I took photos to measure but was too insecure to do so.

This weekend I'll approach, approach at a meetup group, workout, interview prep and play guitar again.
Music makes me happier than women.
 
Weekend approaches.
Slept in quite late as I went out on Friday.
Got into Oxford walked around for a while, got stuck in my head thinking people are more closed off in the UK. Felt shut down, one approach. Complimented she said oh thanks and kept moving.
Saturday night talked to a decent looking blonde girl, seemed to light up and be quite flirty but was drunk and quickly got more drunk and bounced with her friends.
Talked to a chubber was into me but had a boyfriend.
Sunday was even more tired, did life admin and was lazy - didn't go out to approach.

I need to make time for this and really work towards building my volumes. 100 approaches a month would be life changing and doable once I broke it down.

Hit OD numbers got a few matches but no responses from messages

Work: had interview they said they'll give me feedback asap.
Walking around with a suit on Massively increased the attention I was getting from women.
Maybe this is the way to go, dress like a Somebody.

Gym and diet going very well.
Filler consult on the 6th
 
Spoke to derma and will go ahead with some conservative fillers to give me a refreshed look and mitigate undereye bags.

Social:
Mind fuck of an evening talked to an Australian girl, seems kinda into me but also bounces around to other guys a lot too.
Turns out she was seeing my old fb's ex and literally the day I ended I with fb he ended it with her and is going camping with my old fb lol.
She was understandably pissed, seems like a nice girl though.
My old fb and her ex obviously have some serious problems and I'm happy I maintained fb status with her given how quickly they both got back together. I suspect they will continue to cheat on eachother and continue their vicious cycle of retardation.
Despite my lack of experience I stayed grounded and was right to trust my judgement - one of the reasons I told fb I didn't want anything more serious was how close she was to her ex still.

Talked to a super hot Jewish girl she said I was handsome but had a boyfriend. Had a fun conversation about serial killers.
At one point I was sat between Jewish and Australian girl and noticed when I talked to one of them the other would look at me.
A gay guy also said I'll find a girl easily which was nice.

Good signs here, I'm enjoying speaking to some attractive women and getting some nice interactions in.

I've also learnt that 'red flags' are real and would say I'm developing a list of things to vet for as I gain experience. I want to avoid putting time into people who won't reciprocate and am getting better at doing this.

No word back from my interview yet but have heard loads of people went for the vacancy so that has probably extended the time frame.
 
No.2 lay on my birthday.
Had sex with new years girl.
Back with some mental blocks, I put some pressure on myself.
She has a prettier face than fb did but a worse body, I think my brain may need to recalibrate a bit.
Still got fully hard at one point and she went nuts. Also having the tight fit problem when I'm fully up even though she was soaked.

This girl was a pure sub.
I kept loosing my erection so decided to try some fun stuff.
Bit her neck, pinned her arms, kinda skull fucked her for a bit, made her suck her cum off my fingers and spanked her.
All made her go nuts.

I 'performed' really well with the escort last week who wasn't as good looking as this girl so I think a week of nofap and I'll go again with nyg.

Starting to see a trend, I'm very rugged and also massive and I think the last two girls wanted to be dominated. Seeing her on her knees sucking me off definitely woke something up, she's a masochist. I also had moments of thinking 'I'm the shit' and regained full eq.
Real interesting stuff. Made her cum and made sure to leave her wanting more so I can do round 2 next weekend. I set up the date as we were making out lol.

Shes real complimentary and almost needy so the opposite of fb.
Bodymaxxing is the way, she hid my top just to perv for longer lmao

Had some tension earlier in the night with the Australian girl from yesterday when I made a joke about spanking new years girl and she said that's disgusting. I agreed with her and left her to her drink.

A good night and a really validating lay, will get my insecurities to stfu for a while being praised so much even when I couldn't do everything I wanted.

Also drove to hers in my shitty car with her in the passenger seat. So far the red pill sphere focus on wealth seems a bit overstated as long as you bring something to the party.
I want to move from pretty girls to stunners and have more freedom so will keep working on getting rich anyway.
 
So after going back to nyg's place one of my friends found out and got butrhurt because she was hitting on him too but went back with me.
Shame but honestly fuck it, I can't control shit like that.
Also shows the limitations of social circle game.

Felt stuck in a rut today.
Messaged a girl on tinder, moved it to WhatsApp, kept it sexual pitched a Netflix and chill date but haven't heard back.

Daygame in Oxford.
I wandered around, missed some opportunities, got pissed off and approached a nice looking girl who was stood still.
I can approach stationary targets now lol.
We exchanged I pushed for the number she said she had a bf, parted amicably.

Sticking points. I'm paranoid people are watching and judging me, I know this is irrational but it fucks me up.
Most girls were moving and in groups which I find intimidating.

I'm pleased I pushed for the number, will keep going, I need momentum and volume.

Woke up this morning and my time with fb, as intense as it was at the time now seems like a dream.
Felt weird walking past the places we went on our third date, when I finally had the balls to kiss her.
There was a moment where I was super in my head as we were waiting for the bus and out of some feminine intuition she just put her arms around me. She didn't have to do that for me and I'll always be grateful but those moments are gone now and I must keep moving forwards.

Bought a ring and two bracelets. Two muscle fit navy blue shirts. I can get better looking, learn game, dress better, get rich and truly play the numbers game on od and cold approach.

It's all been so worthwhile.
 
New od photos.
Any feedback appreciated.
Will take some more when my new clothes arrive and I get fillers on Thurs.
 
Thinking about nyg girl lay. I don't think the chemistry was there, she said she was dtf anytime which I appreciate but I think she wants to be degraded in the bedroom.
I like leading but she's kinda masochistic and it doesn't really do it for me.
Said she was cool and have parted ways amicably.
 
1 and 8 picture are over exposed, it's better to shoot during an overcast day than under a harsh sun like that, the other option is to shoot at golden hour
 
Thrice said:
1 and 8 picture are over exposed, it's better to shoot during an overcast day than under a harsh sun like that, the other option is to shoot at golden hour
Click to expand...

Thanks dude will ditch these ones
 
Didn't get the second internal vacancy so hit the gym and did 2hrs copywrirtng study.
I'm onto the assignment part of the course right now.

I've been thinking longer term and doing some more research and it looks like lower bleheroplasty procedures are safe and affordable and pretty effective. Will re-assess after fillers.

Going to try and build my social circle closer to me and continue to meet a range of people but focus on talking to good looking women.

Talked to another girl on bumblefor a bit, pitched a date friday but no response.

I've decided to allow myself to admit I miss fb. Super happy I got another lay quickly after it ended but I'm naturally a very sentimental person and we shared some great moments.
It was actually an amazing bit of luck being with such an experienced woman as I was able to learn a lot from her in the bedroom. I do think it wrecked her pair-bonding ability but as I never went all-in and tried to have a relationship with her I will never know.
 
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