Luniac
Member
- Joined
- May 31, 2020
I was struggling to narrow down what exactly is the cause of my anxiety and I compared it to my relative lack of any anxiety at all when meeting from a dating app.
I think the big picture reason is that the whole cold approach environment, as in strangers and the girl is a total stranger gives me a feeling of a hostile unfriendly unsupportive environment.
Even after doing many AA drills which did help tremendously with anxiety, I guess years later it didn’t quite last without maintenance.
But also now that I’m older, I really don’t want to go out there with a sense of “me versus the world”, I made the best progress with getting laid when I followed my kung fu teachers advice of “smile and enjoy life”. It helped me lighten up and not take things so seriously.
But man when you’re on a New York train where everyone looks moody it just feels so intimidating to put yourself front and center, I almost have a physical fear of being assaulted or something it’s like a paranoia.
It definitely is easier to cold approach in daylight without too much crowd and if I’m being “silly not so serious” about the whole thing like I’m just having fun with life.
I guess my life has been also so stressful financially lately that it’s really not easy for me to lighten up.
I’m thinking of getting a supportive wingman and going to bars and making a game out of talking to girls like taking turn or something.
I’m in NYC if anyone likeminded wants to go out
I think some of my friends probably are not on the same wavelength with picking up girls and maybe secretly feel a jealousy maybe.
I think the big picture reason is that the whole cold approach environment, as in strangers and the girl is a total stranger gives me a feeling of a hostile unfriendly unsupportive environment.
Even after doing many AA drills which did help tremendously with anxiety, I guess years later it didn’t quite last without maintenance.
But also now that I’m older, I really don’t want to go out there with a sense of “me versus the world”, I made the best progress with getting laid when I followed my kung fu teachers advice of “smile and enjoy life”. It helped me lighten up and not take things so seriously.
But man when you’re on a New York train where everyone looks moody it just feels so intimidating to put yourself front and center, I almost have a physical fear of being assaulted or something it’s like a paranoia.
It definitely is easier to cold approach in daylight without too much crowd and if I’m being “silly not so serious” about the whole thing like I’m just having fun with life.
I guess my life has been also so stressful financially lately that it’s really not easy for me to lighten up.
I’m thinking of getting a supportive wingman and going to bars and making a game out of talking to girls like taking turn or something.
I’m in NYC if anyone likeminded wants to go out
I think some of my friends probably are not on the same wavelength with picking up girls and maybe secretly feel a jealousy maybe.
