ora forum.jpgHello guys, i have been on the GLL forum for many years, the great advice in that site didn't improve my life because i was very depressed and blackpilled.
in 2013 i was 25 and i made this thread there https://tinyurl.com/djhf7znd talking about thinking its too late for me, in 2016 i started doing tinder experiments https://tinyurl.com/ybdky2rk that got me blackpilled
i wasen't able to do anything, the blackpill was like post traumatic stress, i kept doing tinder experiments with male models, the girls kept inviting me over to have sex and i was so depressed i couldn't even wake up, i woke up like 3pm, i was hiding in my bed from the world, i couldn't believe that all i knew since childhood was a lie, i couldn't accept that that was real woman nature, i was thinking why bother improving myself, woman fall in love with a pretty face and they attribute good qualities to goodlookung man without even knowing them.
I have that i never gave up, the reason i didn't end up homeless or dead is because i kept trying stuff, looking for a job, for a home, it's strange because i have nothing to prove that, i am just a 32 yo guy working in a pizza place trying to get ripped to fuck woman, from the outside i'm just a failure, but consider i couldn't even wake up to eat and shower.
Now i have my own house, a home gym, a online bodybuilding coach, instruments, a vocal coach -online also because of covid- ( i want to join a metal band).
I look such a looser, no girlfiriend, no wife, no friends, i work as the delivery guy for a pizza place, the reason is because when i couldn't wake i need a part time job to buy food, so i started delivering pizza at night, i survived with this job because i couldn't wake up until 3pm. I would be dead without this simple, low status, part time job.
Now i can wake, depression improved, but i keep deliverind pizza full time because it allows me to work on my goals, i lift from 9 to 11am, i go to work, i come back home at 3 pm, i stretch, eat, pratice guitar and singing and work on my online business, i go back to work from 7 to 10.30pm, eat my last meal and go to bed.
I told my story so you don't laugh at me for beign a pizza delivery guy, my life was way worse when i need it this job to eat, i kep improving at a very slow pace like a child, like 1% a month, until i found a house, built a home gyms, learned to wake up, shower and lift everyday. Now a "normal" job would limit me, because i need time to lift, work on my hobbies and online business.
After that blackpill nightmare i redifined whats normal for me, a post wall wife and 8to5 job dosent cut it for me.
I want to make friend, fuck cute girls in their prime, make money online, and also i would like to become a popular dj in my area, i would like to enjoy the night life. I want to do the things i couldn't do when i was blackpilled.
Since society lied to and i got almost destroyed, now i want to improve my life and have fun.
I have been lifiting for the last 1.4 year this is how i look now , i still don't look great but i started out very skinny fat, super thin upper body and large lower body ( depression = cortisol = no protein intake = skinnyfat) now at least i went to normal. I'm working with a professional BB coach now so i don't make mistakes
i also have a hooker addiction, i feel i don't really like the sex with them and i'm wasting my money, but sometimes i miss intimacy and skin to skin contact with woman and i go looking for a hooker, wasting money i could use to improve myself
