Tips and advice for going out by myself

[Sin Silver]

Tomorrows Friday. I finally got my hair cut, I got some swanky new cloths, I feel in great shape, and pubs are finally open, It's time to fucking do this!

It's time for some quick context. Despite living by myself for nearly ten years, I moved in back with my parents around 18 months ago to start a new job. I know live in the small town where I grew up, and I don't know anyone who's the out and about type. Anyone who I knew in high school that was worth a damn has already left.

We have quite a few pubs, but no real clubs. It lacks the big variety I'm use to in cities like Manchester and Birmingham.

I am not sure exactly what it is I want to do. Ideally I want to have fin, I want to also connect with worth while people, who will make me want to come out again, or hang out a later date. Considering I'll be out and about it also sounds like a great time to start cold approaching.

Anyone got any tips or advice on what I should be doing?

 

[terry_crews87]

I use to go to the bar all the time by myself. The last few weekends I stayed in on saturrday nights cuz my friends pussed out. I'm not waiting around for anybody anymore. I'm going out alone this weekend if nobody comes with me. Pubs are way better for me. I don't know if I could stomach a club with no friends with me.

I just like going up to the bar and chilling there. Just get in a social mindset. Who cares about girls. Talk to ANYBODY. The old man sitting next to you, the husband and wife sitting near you, whatever. If people see you talking to other people here and there, nobody will care your out by yourself. When you tell people , they actually think your pretty badass for doing what you want, and don't need the crutch of your friends there. Or just say your friends left , but you wanted to stay for another drink. I just walk up to the bar, order a drink, and start shooting the shit with the bartender.

The key for me was not putting any expectations on anything. If your there for a half hour and your not feeling it, who cares? Just leave. Walk to another bar. If you don't like it there , go home, whatever. That will be much better for your mental state than sitting at home, or not going out. After you do it a few times, it becomes easier, and you start caring less. You'll feel really good about yourself for just forcing yourself to do it, and that will even carry over to other parts of your life.

I took a girl home , only the seconds time ever going out by myself. I took a girl home the most previous time going out by myself, but that was 2 years ago, as i've been retreated into a shell of depression since. Reading the go out alone program on GLL motivated me to do it, definitly read that. LETS DO THIS Sin Silver Then we can talk about how it was on Sunday. We are here to take action. I'm not posting on here again untill I go out alone, or talk to 10 girls in public, whichever comes first. The last thing on earth i want to be is some little bitch who posts on forums about meeting chicks but doesn't do a damn thing in real life. Im ready to take this shit by the balls

Going to workout, then going to beach by myself this afternoon. Working out decently hard before you go out , shakes off any negative or nervous energy for me better than alcohol and drugs. Working out hard, then having a shot or two right before you walk in the first bar helps me the most. Bring a flask with you if you can and you save a bunch of money, just take a shot when you go for a piss.

 

[boblikestacos666]

terry_crews87 my main issue with going out alone is that I don't like drinking, so going to a bar/pub seems out of the question for me. Do you go out alone to any venues where drinking isn't a priority?

 

[Aloofus]

Sin Silver What terry_crews87 said is good advice! Just go out with the expectation to have a good time/be social. I'd just find a spot at the bar and chat up someone near me. It helps loosen you up and getting you in a chatty mood.

If you're a bit anxious about cold approach, you can do warm approach instead. What I mean is look for women that are sending you signals that they'd like you to introduce yourself (eye contact, smiles,etc).

I'd also note not to actually get shifaced. When I go out now I have a drink or two, never more. I've fucked up pretty much every date I've had when I've gotten drunk.

boblikestacos666 you can still go to a bar, just order something non alcoholic. It's actually way cheaper too (and nobody will know your coke doesn't actually have any rum).

 

[l0vebone]

I almost strictly go out alone. I would say a good 95% of the time. My goal is to get laid though not socialize (this is a side goal for me, not my main focus.)

Also I never drink either.

Not sure how I would do it in a small town, but in a big city I got to clubs with hundreds of people at a time, or a downtown area that has thousands at night time. You blend right in even if you're alone, not drinking, etc. Just go from bar to bar, make eye contact with every girl you see so you could tell which ones would be down to do something. Rinse and repeat until you find a girl who's down to spend the rest of the night with you.

It's very fun, equally as fun actually, as going out with people.

 

[SIGMA_1234]

I almost strictly go out alone. I would say a good 95% of the time.

+1. When I was working in HK, I was by myself. I was even an introvert. But the ironic thing is that I socialized more during this time than any other time in my life so far. I talked to female store employees, random strangers in public dinner areas, and strangers in social mixers. I prefer socializing alone; no friends to hold me back and judge my actions. It feels like you are an artist who can do anything on a clean slate.

That was me during daytime. But I am still working on socializing in a bar by myself.

 

[Sin Silver]

I just like going up to the bar and chilling there. Just get in a social mindset. Who cares about girls. Talk to ANYBODY. The old man sitting next to you, the husband and wife sitting near you, whatever. If people see you talking to other people here and there, nobody will care your out by yourself. When you tell people , they actually think your pretty badass for doing what you want, and don't need the crutch of your friends there. Or just say your friends left , but you wanted to stay for another drink. I just walk up to the bar, order a drink, and start shooting the shit with the bartender.

Reading this has really given me the mind set to go out and do this, thank you! I'll try this tomorrow.

Everyone else, thank you, you have realy given me the motivation and mindset to do this.

 

[DNPTHC]

@terry_crews87 hit the nail on the head

I went out alone for about 2 years 3-4 nights every week. Now I know so many people when I go out that I'm never alone. I actually prefer lone wolf because I feel like friends hold me back from talking to girls, I get comfortable. Just get out there, follow GLL's going out alone guide and stop thinking.

This.