AskTheDom: AMA - Game, Self Improvement, BDSM, Sex Positive/Kink, Masculinity (PRINCIPLES FOR SUCCESS W/ WOMEN & LIFE))

MakingAComeback

MakingAComeback

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Jan 19, 2021
Hey bros,

Maybe you've seen the interest in my log, I see that a few of you have expressed that you'd like to pick my friend's brains a little. I do it all the time. It can't jut be me and my friends getting the shine. You too can take a seat at the winner's table, because we are here together, to take action, apply, grow, and succeed.

It can be hard to find access to guys who're levels upon levels ahead of you, and after individual members have expressed that they'd like to dive deeper into certain topics, I've asked The Dom for his permission and he has agreed to take questions you may have, within reason. Please respect his time and be committed to execution. The top guys are happy to help all those who are serious.

ABOUT THE DOM: 20 YEARS OF HUSTLE - THE SEX LIFE OF ROCK STARS

The Dom is a fascinating fellow and at this point needs no introduction, but why he is a particularly interesting fellow to me is that he has achieved high levels of success in many very difficult and complex domains of life. He has had a fucking legendary sex life, the sort of scandalous shit that could fill 10 books, and has found success in business and life beyond this. He has lived self-improvement, success and the pursuit of excellence for around 20 FUCKING YEARS and is STILL grinding to get to higher and higher levels in money, women, and life.

He is one of my own trusted advisors and during our last trip, we saw him do some crazy shit. He fucked 10 girls in 10 days, including:
-2 girls in 1 day
-Cold approach lay
-Night game lay
-Straight to crib lay

Hearing the whips roar through the air was one thing, but to understand The Dom's process is another. He has an exceptionally deep pool of knowledge, his take is often very interesting and at times, very different from your conventional wisdom. From living the life he has lived, and seeing some of the craziest shit a human male can see (this fucker once ran through 57 girls in a 90 day period whilst hustling nightgame) , certain principles have solidified and crystalised.

Success leaves clues. You are the product of the 5 people you associate with most.

The best thing we can do as a community is continue to level ourselves up, succeed, and push the envelope further and further.

Get your questions over and let the whole community benefit. You want to learn more about BDSM, how to get into the scene, how to explore kinky play with your partner, and how to cultivate deeper aspects of your masculinity and sexuality? Or maybe you just want to learn how you get develop your game, your vibe and confidence, skillset with women, and become the best man you can be.

The Dom has an often hard hitting style, which you can see a little of HERE in my transcription of a debrief we had in Krakow concerning my sticking point.

Get his thoughts while you can, his goals are mostly biz & financial related nowadays and he will be pushing like a superhuman to get to Top G status. You may not have access to him for long but I have gotten him to agree to doing this so please make the most of this.

LET'S FUCKING GO!

THE FLOOR IS YOURS

NOW.........ASK THE DOM!

AskTheDom
 
First of all thank you for helping out this community, much appreciated.

As someone who is serious about self-improvement, we have a couple of staples in our life that we have to do without any question. This includes stuff like gym, skincare, enough sleep, being relentless, and cutting off bad habits, ... All of these improvements are LOGICAL. You could describe them as more masculine activities and desires than feminine, which in itself is really good because we embrace masculinity.

But when we are going for women, we want to get them in their EMOTIONAL state which contains energy, vibe, and flirting, ... As our grind is so logical, how can you still be that man that can attract lots of women? Often I find it difficult to relate and vibe with women because my life is so different than theirs, yet I of course do want to click with them. I'm curious how you can make this switch or what has taught you how to go about this.
 
AskTheDom Two things for me:

#1: Next year, one of my goals I'm working out is to increase my socialization, as well as my connections with women. On the woman front, one of the biggest challenges I'm facing is that I'm completely new to this 'game' stuff. I don't have an extensive sexual history, so this will be my first time tackling this stuff since college. I know one of the first things that will help is obviously getting clear on what I want (this is in progress) but how can I learn more about the game of attraction overall at the beginner levels? Is it just repetition from exposure or are there reliable resources I can use to learn from?

Quesiton 2: Being a black male, I'm curious if you know any who are absolutely crushing it with women/life. If so, what are a few traits you notice they have in common? Also, do you have any insight on how I can use these genetics to their maximum advantage? (Particular cities, clothing types, archetypes, etc.) Thanks brotha!
 
AskTheDom email Andy if you arent already in touch. We agreed you should do a pod with him if you are down
 
First off, big thanks to MakingAComeback for putting this together.

I'm sure I'll have more questions I'll add after some thought but my first is...

What is the top resource you learned from for the for each of the following:
  • Game
  • Mindset
  • Business
  • Kink/ BDSM

And how did each of those resources help your development? What lessons did you learn and apply from those that changed you?

EDIT: Ok, here are a few more

  1. When you're at a sex club, how do you typically approach women?
  2. When you were a new Dom, how did you get comfortable with directly telling a sub what to do?
  3. What's your preferred way of handling bratty subs?
  4. What was your lowest point or biggest hurdle in self doubt during your journey?
  5. For women you might wish to retain, rather than a ONS, do you do anything differently in terms of the date or sex?

Thanks AskTheDom!
 
Great initiative MAC!

Maybe I'm pushing it a bit but here's my list of 10 questions for Mr.Dom:

  1. How did you get involved into BDSM?
  2. What do you like the most about BDSM?
  3. What are you screening for in women and why?
  4. What should be the priorities for a beginner getting started into BDSM in your opinion?
  5. What are the most important qualities to have as a Dom in your opinion?
  6. What's the biggest mindset shift you had throughout your journey?
  7. What is your favorite top 3 go-to bondage positions?
  8. What are some good ways to "punish" your partner? I feel like I only use spanks and lack creativity.
  9. If you're traveling and had to choose a minimalist kit of essential BDSM stuff with you, what would you bring?
  10. If you're comfortable with that, can you share one of your wild sex stories ahaha
 
KillYourInnerLoser said:
Aku said:
How did you get involved into BDSM?
What do you like the most about BDSM?
What are you screening for in women and why?
What should be the priorities for a beginner getting started into BDSM in your opinion?
What are the most important qualities to have as a Dom in your opinion?
What's the biggest mindset shift you had throughout your journey?
What is your favorite top 3 go-to bondage positions?
What are some good ways to "punish" your partner? I feel like I only use spanks and lack creativity.
If you're traveling and had to choose a minimalist kit of essential BDSM stuff with you, what would you bring?
If you're comfortable with that, can you share one of your wild sex stories ahaha
Click to expand...

I'm gonna steal these questions and answer them myself (for content) on my own YouTube channel. Vid should be out in the next 3 days on my channel.
Click to expand...

Man, I agree, these were fantastic questions and I wish encourage guys to come up with more :)
 
Seriously, I think this is great. I don't know if others would be game, but would love to have these AMA's for all the regular veterans here on the forums. Maybe we could do one a month? Then if there are a lot of questions, KillYourInnerLoser could have them on the podcast. Just an idea.
 
Bros, I have received The Dom's answers. They're fucking heroic I am loving them LOL. I will transcribe them from my WhatsApp tomorrow.

This is shaping out to be a great idea man. There is fucking GOLD here.

This guy really did it man. He has been on a brilliant journey, he worked hard, smart, had a great plan, learned from great people but also had some really world-class talent himself. The unforgiving cauldron he was forged in, his best friends were the greatest slayers of all time, 10/10 physical specimen Giga Chads who were also world champion athletes (10/10 genes meet world-class competitive spirit, literal world champion level) just ripped through the entire sexual landscape like a tsunami and clapped THOUSANDS of cheeks.

How do you adapt and overcome? You simply find a way to compete with these savages.

And he did it. The result is what you see, and you will read this level of knowledge and understanding in the answers.

As ever, life is about more than just women, it's also about business and money man. And he is in the 1% here.

That is why I pushed to start this thread man. This is our community, we are here for success and excellence, why shouldn't we all get to high levels in life?

MAC
 
KillYourInnerLoser said:
I'm gonna steal these questions and answer them myself (for content) on my own YouTube channel. Vid should be out in the next 3 days on my channel.
Click to expand...
Cool! That's awesome.

Looking forward to listening to both of your answers KillYourInnerLoser & AskTheDom

:D
 
AskTheDom AMA: VOLUME #1 Q&A W/ THE DOM

So, I am transcribing these answers from my WhatsApp as The Dom is basking in the afterglow of another threesome, which was very nearly a foursome too, but that’s a tale for another day.

Thank you to the action-takers who formed thoughtful questions. You’ve got some answers to analyse and understand now. So get up today and keep working. Success is inevitable if you just work smart, hard, and remain persistent.

kratjeuh

Thank you for your interesting question.

Your question is curious to me, because of an assumption that underpins your question. You may have a belief around self improvement which may need to be examined further.

Kratjeuf, you assume self-improvement is a logical game.

It’s not.

As a concept, it is on the surface a very rational thing. Peel away the layers, and it’s something more complicated. Let me break it down for you: if you think because you self-improve, you can obtain a vibe, you’re mistaken.

Self improvement is about goal setting, working hard, and pushing forward. This is very rational

BUT…………

With that, there is the critical piece that is required for us to have success with women.

This will involve you learning to disconnect part of your brain and enter a different state entirely.

When people go to work, they’re solving problems and in flow. When they leave work, they ca forget about their obligations, and change their state.

For the success you seek, understand that when it comes to the world of women, you will forge connection and attraction through your emotions. So, if you don’t FEEL your emotions and a “good times” type of vibe, that is something that YOU will need to explore, deeper.

Perhaps you have an internal roadblock that stops you from connecting with women, but understand that THERE IS A SWITCH: when someone is in connection with their emotions, they can make that switch.

Hence, part of this will be about disconnecting and learning to shift your state. Your job is to find that switch. And to do so, you will need to foster a deeper connection to your Self, and your emotions.

Bottom line: If you’re in connection with your emotions, you can connect with a woman’s emotions.



natedawg


The ONLY 3 books I would ever recommend are:
(1) The Mystery Method (the original text)
(2) Daygame Mastery – Nick Krauser (Note: It’s quite advanced)
(3) Street Hustle - Tom Terrero

Studying is good, but this is all about exposure.

THERE IS NO WAY TO CHEAT SOCIAL SKILLS

Understand the above. And do the work.

As for your second question, I have a couple of friends who are black and ABSOLUTELY SLAY, like, entirely. They have different styles, one has more of a hard charging entrepreneur look, and the other more of a street style, photographer kinda guy.

The three commonalities which connect these players: (1) They’re black, (2) They’re absolutely fucking SHREDDED to the bone, (3) They have really good, solid social skills, and can effortlessly talk to pretty much anyone.

I won’t advise clothing types. Cities like New York and London are solid. As for archetypes to emulate, Tyga the rapper does some interesting things and may be worth considering.

Be reassured, you can succeed. I also remember a guy from my city, a guy who was absolutely smashing it, and he was black. 2 meters tall, Cuban Bachata teacher, definitely in shape, and had a very upbeat social vibe to him.

pancakemouse

My introduction to pick up/game: Officially, I got my introduction to “pick up” or “game” as we know it today by reading The Game from one of my friends who was working with me in the club. But, as far as a systematic approach to game, I got it from one of the legends of Rimini, The Romeo of Rimini, Maurizio ‘Zanza’ Zanfanti. He was, basically, this legend who slayed so many Scandinavians that there’s a statue erected to him somewhere in Sweden.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maurizio_Zanfanti
https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/maurizio-zanfanti-inside-world-italys-13359561

I met this guy, and what I’ll always remember was his unbelievable charisma. He’d riff on how, when you speak to a woman, you have to make love with your eyes, mesmerise her, speak to her confidently. If you think about it, it’s a lot of things you can even see in mainstream dating advice, like in a issue of GQ magazine. Just be confident! 😉

I remember searching for articles on the internet, over 20 years ago, and let me, a lot of what was around back then was absolutely mad. But what mattered was the concept of systematising it: you go there, you’re confident, and you speak to her this way. This led to useful reference experience. Then came The Game, The Mystery Method, and me connecting the dots. It began to make sense, and I had a lightbulb moment.


Bman

Top resources! I mean, experiences is always the best teacher, but that aside:

GAME
(1) Daygame Mastery – Nick Krauser

MINDSET
….LIFE EXPERIENCE 😉

But that aside, there are a few resources I’d say are valuable: the work of The Stoics, Marcus Aurelius, and so on.

BUSINESS

(1) The Millionaire Fastlane – MJ Demarco

KINK/BDSM

Self-taught! A useful website is Shibari from The Duchy, they cover it all – ropes, knots, everything.

As for how these resources contributed to my development: overall, man, it’s like a mesh, you know?

You learn one thing, you struggle with it, and you internalise it over time, not even remembering how you were before. The development stacks up. Overall, through the process of internalisation, I became more mature as a man. And that’s the bottom line!




MAC
 
The Mystery Method should be required reading for anyone in this space. He actually talked about how preselection is the most powerful "attraction switch" in a woman.

This has been completely forgotten in the PUA community. He also talked about taking girls with you when you go out at night, another thing that's been completely forgotten - I think he even said something like "nothing's worse for your attraction than going to the club in a completely male group."

Thank you MAC MakingAComeback for putting these answers together, and AskTheDom special thanks for mentioning Zanza... There was a period in my life where I was obsessed with the lives of these real life playboys and this brought back some memories.
 
Holden said:
special thanks for mentioning Zanza... There was a period in my life where I was obsessed with the lives of these real life playboys and this brought back some memories.
Click to expand...

Dude, thanks goes to pancakemouse for bringing that up, the memories made me travel through time 20 years when I met him in person after hearing so many stories, I would say that after Rocco Siffredi, he was #2 on the list of the "male models"
When I heard of him passing away, and how he passed, I shed a tear and a laugh, what a legend.
 
Holden said:
he Mystery Method should be required reading for anyone in this space. He actually talked about how preselection is the most powerful "attraction switch" in a woman.

This has been completely forgotten in the PUA community. He also talked about taking girls with you when you go out at night, another thing that's been completely forgotten - I think he even said something like "nothing's worse for your attraction than going to the club in a completely male group."
Click to expand...

Exactly, I understand it's an "old" book and sometimes sounds either too robotic like reading an Ikea manual or too artistic with all the feminine metaphors, but that book contains ALL, how to tell a story, how to move your body, it's A L L written there.

This also brings a quote that I forgot to mention MakingAComeback

"There is nothing new under the sun"

I'm just a collector of concepts that have been tested through time (the ultimate test) and condensed in my personality-subconscious. But hundreds of years and millions of Men that came before me, tried and proved everything everywhere, there is not "genious" ideas to have, Read, Understand, Practice, Repeat, Finish.
 
I could ask a lot of questions about cold approach but I will get all the answers through deliberate practice. I just want to ask one thing instead:

How do you keep that dog mentality after 20 years of hustling? Is there truly no endgame?
 
THE DOM AMA: VOLUME #2

Question from twonightstander

twonightstander said:
I could ask a lot of questions about cold approach but I will get all the answers through deliberate practice. I just want to ask one thing instead:

How do you keep that dog mentality after 20 years of hustling? Is there truly no endgame?
Click to expand...

Answer: The Dom (AskTheDom)

When it comes to Cold Approach, there are a few common pitfalls and traps guys tend to fall into. As I’ve outlined, and I will repeat here, there are 3 essential resources:

1) The Mystery Method
2) Street Hustle
3) Daygame Mastery

….and that really is ALL you’ll need to know.

If your not clear on something, and need further clarity, the answer will either be either the Mystery Method, Street Hustle or Daygame Mastery.

Now, I could dive quite deep into your question here, and a few follow-up questions do emerge, but I will give you my take on how I’ve kept the dog mentality for 20 years. It starts with the following understanding:

THERE IS NO END GAME

From here, we can answer your question.

Everything in our journey starts with a fairly unassuming-looking question,. This is the fundamental question, the Archimedean lever from which the mere mortal can lift the mountain. You will come back to this core question over and over and over again.

Right now, focus in, because I want you to carve this question into the back of your skull. You must understand this, because it is the point of departure……...

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

What you want is not a static thing. Over a significant enough time horizon, what you want changes.

Let’s take your case, your goal: master day game. A great goal. But here’s the thing when it comes to goals and achievement.

In 5 years, what may look totally crazy, over the top and real blue-sky thinking, will look rather mundane if you’ve been getting your work done.

When we are climbing the mountain of success, it’s always a case of pushing further, thinking bigger, and aiming higher and higher.

The continuous chase, a life which, should you choose it, becomes one subjected to certain fundamental laws and patterns.

Success and achievement can be understood as a process of maximal, concerted pushing, seriously stretching your limits with mindful, strategic, deliberate practice, followed by rest, reassessment, and reorientation. At it’s core, the game of success is in fact a loop:

1) OBSERVE
2) ORIENT
3) DECIDE
4) ACT

You observe what you want. You orient yourself in the direction of achieving this. You decide you will go for it. And then, you act.

At it’s core, this is what the actualisation of your potential is composed of. And once you see through the matrix and decode the pattern for what it is, you have finally gotten the keys to the Universe.

And you do what needs to be done.

AGAIN AND AGAIN.

Now, you get over to the other side. Congratulations.

Guess what?

You will, inevitably go back to the first question I began this answer with. Yes, that’s right, after all of that work, all that hustle, and the success you did infact achieve, you are going to ask yourself:

Now what do I want?

Long-term, your commitments, perspectives, views of the world and of the human-animal are susceptible to change. We have to flow with this and gain clarity in the flux of the desire at our core. Certain principles will crystallise over time nonetheless. Consider this: I don’t believe in marriage, for example. Say in 6 months or 2 years, I’m with a girl who wants to bring other girls into our relationship. That is something I’m willing to go for, and a situation I would say I want. It boils down to the same question.

Now here is where we bridge the gap between theory and practice.

The dog mentality is about cultivating a burning desire within yourself to achieve the goal!

To complete the task at hand. Realise this, while you can achieve A LOT in life, you can’t achieve everything. If I could have everything, it’d be living in a dream come true.

KEEPING THE DOG MENTALITY IS A MENTAL GAME

Wrapping this all together, then:

You must begin to stretch yourself and look at objectives which are so big, they genuinely scare you, because what I will tell you is this: you also need to feel genuine emotions about your goals. Nobody feels true emotion around the plain notion of ‘dropping 10% in bodyfat’, BUT, for instance if you begin to put the image of you stripped down by 10% bodyfat in your mind, and you begin to feel this reality, all of a sudden your inner world changes. “DAMN, that’s a bad motherfucker”.

Know what you want, and build that image in your mind so it can drive your emotions. And this will force you to become a hustler, because you already know how to get the result you seek. It’s like tying your shoes, once you get it done, you nail it down, and it’s there for you. You need to sprint? You can tie your shoes and be off like a shot! Deep down you know what is required to get the job done, you just need to tap into your emotions and fuel the fire, and turn it from sparks in kindling, to a great, roaring forest fire that burns with unstoppable fury and will never burn out….

Keeping the fire burning and the dog mentality well and truly alive in part assumes you wear a mask to complete a task, by the way.

……….BUT THIS IS A TRANSFORMATIONAL PROCESS!

You lift your shield, you go to war, and this is more about the person you become in the process than you may realise just now.

And that’s how winning is done.

-THE DOM
 
AskTheDom

Two questions:
1. What are you reading lately and why?
2. How can I cultivate more patience with my progress? Many times I find myself getting in the trap of seeing how far I have to go, and comparing myself against other people who have what I want. I know this isn't productive at all, and I feel I'm getting better at it. But I'd love any perspective you have around this.
 
AskTheDom

Actually, if anyone else wants to jump in with an opinion, that's great (as long as it's backed up with experience).

1) Why would you recommend Torero's and Krauser's books? What concepts do you find there that are valuable and different from Mystery style PUA and general Red Pill stuff and Good Looking Loser?

2) What's your take on Ross Jeffries method? I mean, verbal game, PNL, patterns, that kind of stuff. Do you know any evidence that this works?

Thanks
 
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