Brandon Builds - Start on a New Harem & Dating as a Dom

[MILFandCookies]

Reset my Hinge after the ban. Trying out a ton of different openers, seeing what sticks. Nothing has outperformed “Hey you’re sexy. I’m looking for something specific on here.” Will continue the experiment.

What do you put after they respond? The way I remember Andy using that line is when he's looking for threesomes.

 

[Bman]

Reset my Hinge after the ban. Trying out a ton of different openers, seeing what sticks. Nothing has outperformed “Hey you’re sexy. I’m looking for something specific on here.” Will continue the experiment.

What do you put after they respond? The way I remember Andy using that line is when he's looking for threesomes.

Yes Andy screens for threesomes with that. Before that he screened for BDSM girls using "Have experience with being submissive/BDSM, or something you'd like to explore?" which is what I typically followed the opener with. At the end of the year last year I started saying "Have any experience with kink or D/s dynamics, or something you'd like to explore?" as some girls just automatically assumed all BDSM was tying them up and beating them, which its not.

I'm no idiot. I know that is what gets me banned. However its pretty effective at screening yes girls because its so polarizing. I'd keep using it, however:

1. Resetting Hinge gets old. Especially if I've done it a few times in one year, because you will get the same girls you talked to before in your immediate radius and they have seen the line before.
2. I'd like more experience converting maybe girls.
3. I would like to develop my own style of game. Not reinventing the wheel, just being in line with what is natural to me

So I'm using the time right now where I have 2 FB's to experiment.

 

[Bman]

This week’s reflection

Apps

So on Hinge, “Hey you’re sexy. I’m looking for something specific on here.” is still working best, but I’m now trying out different follow-up lines to that.

However another that has gotten a few responses is “Are you as interesting as you are cute?”. Also just liking a couple girls photos without putting anything got a couple matches.

Also got back some photos from the pitch event I did on Tuesday. Threw them up on my dating profiles.


View attachment 1


Girls

Thursday: Ad Girl
Friday: Spiritual Girl

I’d like to start practicing semen retention if I’m fucking girls on multiple consecutive days. It’s difficult to go multiple rounds with the latter girl if I already came a bunch with previous ones. Spreading them out with a day in between would also help, but sometimes scheduling does not allow that.

Feels great to have girls on rotation. I can go on dates next week and totally bomb (unlikely) and know I’m still having some awesome sex later. I’d like to see at least one new girl a week, but it’s not a detriment when it does not happen.

Also enjoying building a better connection with these girls. Ad Girl has been getting more confident inside the bedroom doing more dirty talk and things, and also more confident outside by searching for a new job after hearing about me and my startup. Spiritual Girl is a little nympho and has thanked me a ton for helping lean into and expand her sexuality. Leave them better than you found them.

New dates next week:

• Monday: 19yo Asian from Hinge, likely to flake
• Wednesday: 24yo tattooed dirtbike model from Feeld, feel confident she’ll show

Cold Approach

Got number from a southern blonde this week while approaching, but was already booked up for the rest of the week so didn’t follow-up after the initial text to her.

 

[twonightstander]

@twonightstander: Thanks for your support and your level of detail in doing approaches. You’re a machine. Was very inspirational and clued me into how I can improve my own. Keep kicking ass man.

Thank you for the kind words man and congratulations on the fantastic work in 2022. Looking forward to seeing you kick even more ass this 2023!

 

[Holden]

Bman If possible try to get the photographer to take a shot of you with the crowd visible in the photo, even if he has to photograph you from the back. Much more powerful to communicate social proof and 'leader of men' qualities than these. You probably didn't really have a choice though but it never hurts to ask for a specific picture before you go up & speak.

 

[Bman]

@Bman If possible try to get the photographer to take a shot of you with the crowd visible in the photo, even if he has to photograph you from the back. Much more powerful to communicate social proof and 'leader of men' qualities than these. You probably didn't really have a choice though but it never hurts to ask for a specific picture before you go up & speak.

Yeah I got a couple from the side. Unfortunately he was not high enough to get the whole room which was packed full and when you crop it you only see the people on the side.

 

[Holden]

You're still obviously the center of attention so that's a much more useful pic than the others you've posted.

 

[Bman]

You're still obviously the center of attention so that's a much more useful pic than the others you've posted.

Threw it up on the profiles to see how it does.

 

[Bman]

This week’s reflection

Girls

Thursday: Lay #19: Dancer Girl: https://killyourinnerloser.com/forums/viewtopic.php?p=50935#p50935
Saturday: Photoshoot with Spiritual Girl

Really had fun shooting photos. Spiritual Girl did not want her face completely shown, which is understandable. It was also the first time shooting erotic photography and first time doing a lighting setup in this place. So shots were mediocre for my standards. But it makes me excited to hone this new skill, learn poses and lighting, and of course, fucking the girls while I do it. I’d like to link up with a girl doing OF or something so I can rapidly progress the skill by shooting more often and someone who is used to posing. Would also like to meet a few other photographers who I could just talk shop with. Not ones that only shoot the girls, but are actually hooking up with them. Probably kind find some on FetLife. As I have mentioned before, I think this could be something that could help me to punch above my weight-class and sleep with hotter girls, at least in the kink community.

Dates next week:

• Saturday: 33yo spiritual and psychedelics guide from Feel’d

Leader of Men

After doing the pitch last week on stage, I want to get into more situations like this. Finished reading Yohami’s notes this week and putting yourself in environments where you are the top guy is something he highly recommends. So I’ve been contemplating other things I could do for this.

A couple ideas I had:

• Start a munch (kinky meetup) group in South Austin. Every time I go to one of the kink events, people (including myself) bitch that there are not many events in South Austin and everyone has to drive up north. The coffee bar I take girls to dates on would be perfect because it’s all outdoor patio seating and has a variety of drink options from alcohol, coffee, and tea. Bonus would be I get to set the time (so I can go to bed early) and it’s a short walk from my house. Doing this would make me a leader in the community, and girls come to me, rather than me having to go find them at another event.
• Start a meetup group for founders. Similar to the above idea. Though, I need to think through exactly how I’d want to run it. I went to one that was focused on books which I found to be a lot of fun because I read so much. Could host at the same place. This could give me access to the “hot professionals”, of which I have attracted couple in my lays and would like to isolate what exactly is attracting them so I can amplify it.

I’ll continue to look out for speaking gigs, pitches, performances, ect. Also seen Holden doing an improv workshop/performance which could also be beneficial because it makes me uncomfortable thinking of doing that.

365 Project/ Mindset

Putting this in here for others reading the log. Yohami’s notes really helped further my mindset recently about game. Thanks pancakemouse for originally sharing it.

 

[Holden]

YES, I wish more people discussed ideas in this vein.

I know a guy from my boxing gym who organises "self-defence for women" classes. You can guess why.

Todd V (I don't care much for him but stumbled upon a video of his recently) talked about how if he was rich he'd leverage his money by organizing yoga retreats.

There's potentially a million different things you can do (photography, DJing is the low-hanging fruit everyone thinks of (because it works)) but I'm really interested in these "out of the box" ideas.

So I'm glad that others are catching and trying to think of other scenarios. Hopefully more ideas are coming.

 

[AskTheDom]

So one thing I came to the conclusion to is that my best looking girls came from daygame.
Although If I see the time invested in daygame versus the apps, the latter provides the best efficiency.

BUT my best of the best came from the nights I was working as a club promoter

Bman you definitely have the capability to became the local legend, I don't know why I'm maybe projecting a lot on you but I think with a bit of strategy and hard work you can really become the guy that chicks write to on fetlife lol

 

[Bman]

Holden, I recognized it's usefulness after landing my ex-wife in college. Long story short, I was one of the best designers in our class of architecture students, had the highest grades in all of our classes, but I was hardly ever in studio so I made it look "easy". I'd often get others coming to me for help or advice, including the really hot girls in our class. When we had parties, I used to get really cocky when drunk and did whatever the fuck I wanted. My ex told me she had really started paying attention to me after one of the parties when I was chilling on the couch with the hot bohemian type girl from our class sitting in my lap.

Now, I was too insecure, didn't understand women or game, and did not know what the fuck I was doing back then. Looking back I probably could have slept with the bohemian girl and the two hot blondes in our class, all of whom I really wanted to fuck. You live and learn.

Funny side tangent, said bohemian girl ended up dating our cool professor from junior year who was visiting from Harvard and now they are engaged. Hypergamy is real.

@Bman you definitely have the capability to became the local legend, I don't know why I'm maybe projecting a lot on you but I think with a bit of strategy and hard work you can really become the guy that chicks write to on fetlife lol

That's what aiming to do. I also plan on traveling the US next year, so I'm hoping to leverage the reputation every time I enter a new city to get a head start. Eventually building myself a network across the US. I think starting to figure the skills of how to be a community organizer now will help me keep rapidly doing it when I enter a new city. Short term I'll lose the clout I build in ATX. Long term I'll be bigger. However I really enjoy ATX, so it will be a regular stop in my travels.

Also, I seen recently that one of your goals in 2023 is to do a shibari performance. From what I have seen, those guys get a lot of attention. I don't have much interest in rope. However I have thought about getting good at knife/sword play. I have a Katana and thought it would be cool to do a performance with. In the next few years I'd like to start training Kendo or Aikido, so could incorporate it in a club performance. Seemed unique. Curious what you have seen in your experiences at the clubs?

 

[AskTheDom]

Also, I seen recently that one of your goals in 2023 is to do a shibari performance. From what I have seen, those guys get a lot of attention. I don't have much interest in rope. However I have thought about getting good at knife/sword play. I have a Katana and thought it would be cool to do a performance with. In the next few years I'd like to start training Kendo or Aikido, so could incorporate it in a club performance. Seemed unique. Curious what you have seen in your experiences at the clubs?

Yes Knife play has been around a bit, although it doesn't get the same attention because of the artistic nature of shibari and the skills needed.
In pretty much all the shows i've been, knife play was like a intro - show pause to give the audience something lighter and quick to see different, never the show stopper.
BUT we talk about you and your skills. if this is something that you can perform well and safely, why not? better be a big fish in a small pond

 

[Bman]

This week’s reflection

Girls

Monday: Lay #20: Psychedelic Girl: https://killyourinnerloser.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=40&t=1536&start=45

She’s also coming with me to my new munch this upcoming Monday. We’ll see how this one plays out.

Ad Girl:Tried getting her over on Friday after I had a date cancel but she is currently dealing with a sinus infection after getting back from her trip. Said she missed me. How sweet.

Spiritual Girl: Currently on a trip with her primary partner in Costa Rica. However she also texted me on Friday saying she really misses Daddy and will be back Wednesday. Again, how sweet.

Dancer Girl: After rescheduling multiple times, she said she’s too busy with her life right now to take things further. Never got her over for the lock-in lay. Damn.

Leader of Men

So I ran my first munch on Monday. It went well and I had fun. I found that I really enjoy being the head of the table and running things. I’m much more comfortable and social than if I’m just an attendee. What can I say, I like control. I’m doing them weekly, so the next one is tomorrow and already have people RSVP’ed for it. Some from the last one, some new. With Psychedelic Girl coming it will be my first time taking one of my girls to something like this.

I’m going to run this for a month or two before jumping into starting a founder meetup or something to meet more young, hot professionals. I also need to think through more of what those will be structured/centered around, or if it will be a good option to do.

365 Project

Quite a week dealing with my mom’s mental health situation while being states away. I feel I have done well so far with balancing everyone’s needs, including my own.

B Maxxing

So I watched Ed’s interview on Andy’s channel and really appreciated seeing his evolution of photos and style. For whatever reason it sparked me to want to storyboard my archetype I’m aiming for after hearing him say he started by running “fuckboi lite” which I also felt I’m doing. I’ve seen a few the elite profiles on these forums and I always felt slightly discouraged because they look like your typical chad. I’ve always felt like the anti-chad. So it was nice to have a look at what an maxxed version of that might be from a looks standpoint.

I’ve been with 20 woman which I felt was minimal sample size to start to see some patterns. As it stands, these are the looks quality of woman I currently get with my looks threshold:


View attachment 1


And from my observations, this seems to be the archetypes that I’ve interacted with and where they fall:





First off, this is why I love having a log and data to look back on. I was actually humbled by how good looking these girls were. In the moment I was so worried about my own confidence to get girls. Looking back, not to shabby. Good reminder to put things in perspective.

Now to be clear, this data is only from online lays (except my ex who was social circle) and only within ATX. I know in the past for instance I have attracted attention from light skinned Latinas in WA. My mileage may vary in other places or forms of game.

Based on my natural strengths in looks and the persona/style I like, I storyboarded what the maxxed out version of Bman could look like: a blend of rocker/ bohemian/ smart look, heavily tatted, solid physique, beard and long hair. I also storyboarded a few photo concepts along the way.

This gives some things I can improve over the next several years:

• Tattoos: Over the next decade I can drop $20,000+ on tattoos. Now let’s be clear, this will improve my SMV, but really it’s for me. I really love art and design. I love it even more I get to carry it around with me on my body to look at whenever I want. They also serve as mementos of transformation points in my life. I’ve also always wanted to be a walking contradiction in professional circles where people judge my appearance and then shocked by my competence. So I’ll be happy to do this. I’m already somewhere between $1000-$2000 in. I’ll start with sleeves, move to chest, stomach, back, and then legs. Hands I’ll probably do. Neck I’m still iffy on. Most likely won’t ever touch the face.
• Beard: As long as I take care of it with proper routine and nutrition, it will just keep filling itself out. I could be thicker, but it’s a hell of a lot better than my early 20’s.
• Hair: I’m going to start learning to braid my natural hair and exploring hair extensions and clip in braids for more Viking styles. I enjoy the long hair and its fun having the girls comment how healthy and thick it is compared to theirs. I tell them to stop putting so much shit in it.
• Physique: I’ve been building this over the last decade and recently really sculpting out areas. My chest is rounding out more, my delts and shoulders are larger, and my ab muscles are larger now that I can have a slightly higher BF and still have them visible. However when above 10%, fat stores on my love handles which takes away that V shape. So that will be a delicate balance.
• Clothes: I have pretty much the basic versions of most of the items in the storyboards. So it will just be a matter of swapping out and finding better versions over time.

So over time, with these things, I think I can get some extra SMV points in the looks department. As always, welcome to thoughts and feedback.

 

[pancakemouse]

B Maxxing

So I watched Ed’s interview on Andy’s channel and really appreciated seeing his evolution of photos and style. For whatever reason it sparked me to want to storyboard my archetype I’m aiming for after hearing him say he started by running “fuckboi lite” which I also felt I’m doing. I’ve seen a few the elite profiles on these forums and I always felt slightly discouraged because they look like your typical chad. I’ve always felt like the anti-chad. So it was nice to have a look at what an maxxed version of that might be from a looks standpoint.

I’ve been with 20 woman which I felt was minimal sample size to start to see some patterns. As it stands, these are the looks quality of woman I currently get with my looks threshold:


Girls.PNG


And from my observations, this seems to be the archetypes that I’ve interacted with and where they fall:


InkedAmap.jpg


First off, this is why I love having a log and data to look back on. I was actually humbled by how good looking these girls were. In the moment I was so worried about my own confidence to get girls. Looking back, not to shabby. Good reminder to put things in perspective.

Now to be clear, this data is only from online lays (except my ex who was social circle) and only within ATX. I know in the past for instance I have attracted attention from light skinned Latinas in WA. My mileage may vary in other places or forms of game.

Based on my natural strengths in looks and the persona/style I like, I storyboarded what the maxxed out version of Bman could look like: a blend of rocker/ bohemian/ smart look, heavily tatted, solid physique, beard and long hair. I also storyboarded a few photo concepts along the way.

Wow! This is the most work I've ever seen someone put into their personal archetype. Other guys could learn a lot from this.

 

[natedawg]

Interesting stuff on the archetype. Nice to see another fellow ink lover out there. Some of your visuals in those slides line up with the route I plan on going down when the time comes.

Out of all these areas to improve, which do you think will move the needle for you most over the next few months/years?

 

[Bman]

Out of all these areas to improve, which do you think will move the needle for you most over the next few months/years?

Short term: clothes, learning a few hairstyle tricks, and just taking more photos that tell the archtype story more congruently.

Long term: tattoos. The reason so many of those photos work so well is because of the contrast and extreme visual stimulation from the tattoos. Now technically I could go drop thousands right now and have it all in one year, but I don't want to spend that kind of money all at once and would rather build them over time. They will be more meaningful to me that way.

 

[Myelinated]

@Bman If possible try to get the photographer to take a shot of you with the crowd visible in the photo, even if he has to photograph you from the back. Much more powerful to communicate social proof and 'leader of men' qualities than these. You probably didn't really have a choice though but it never hurts to ask for a specific picture before you go up & speak.

Yeah I got a couple from the side. Unfortunately he was not high enough to get the whole room which was packed full and when you crop it you only see the people on the side.


Pitch small.jpg

Maybe a little late, but see how this looks. On a phone screen the photoshop tricks won't be noticeable, trust me (if they even are now).

 

[Myelinated]

@Bman If possible try to get the photographer to take a shot of you with the crowd visible in the photo, even if he has to photograph you from the back. Much more powerful to communicate social proof and 'leader of men' qualities than these. You probably didn't really have a choice though but it never hurts to ask for a specific picture before you go up & speak.

Yeah I got a couple from the side. Unfortunately he was not high enough to get the whole room which was packed full and when you crop it you only see the people on the side.


Pitch small.jpg

Maybe a little late, but see how this looks. Remember that this'll be only be seen on a small phone screen, so any artifacts from editing won't be noticeable (if they even are now).

 

[Bman]

Myelinated, thanks man. I did crop it similar to how you did here and put it up on my profiles.