SamJ_ said:
In fact I saw the same girl in the same place I had seen a few weeks before, and thought about how much I would regret it if I pussied out, so I did a full approach, but there was also no one else around and watching, and I just happened to think of a good way to start a conversation. But in normal situations, apparently I have a bigger fear of public embarrassment than I do of regret. Apparently I just haven't wanted to approach badly enough in the past. I get self conscious pretty easily and (evidently) fear embarrassing myself and somehow need to find a way to fix this naturally. When I'm drunk I am the exact opposite, too little in the way of self-consciousness, I have no shame and say absolutely cringeworthy shit without any concern for how it is received. Somehow I need to find a middle ground naturally.
You just need to approach more girls to get rid of these feelings. You're still a baby right now learning how to walk. Once you approach 100 girls I'm sure that these feelings will have subsided a bit. Nobody's perfect in the beginning and changes do not happen immediately. Its all a work in progress.
About public embarrassment, it is tough to break through that mental barrier, but at the end of the day who cares when your ultimate goal is getting laid. Your interaction in the day is like a speck of dust in someone's memory. Nobody out in the world honestly will remember if you acted like a fool. You are generally the only one dwelling on the embarrassing moments. People out in public generally don't pay anyone any attention outside of their own little bubble. So its fine to embarrasses your self.
I also agree that you should fix your style. Working on how you look will have a huge impact on the way you feel about approaching girls, and how they react. If you look and feel good it will have an effect on your approach.
I always point people to https://thehatfish.com/ for a great beginners guide to dress.
Also basically everything you have said is what the AA program works on. Feeling self conscious out in public, embarrassing your self, approaching groups, hesitation, etc. All of this stuff comes from a lack of social freedom, and approach anxiety. Since you're already out there approaching girls I'm not sure if you need to do the program, but I will always encourage people to do it. It not only teaches guys to feel comfortable approaching, but also helps with breaking out of the social norms and doing things that may be perceived as weird as a new normal.
Some key pointers I learned on my journey are:
Set time restrictions to motivate your self
Approach the first girl you see regardless of the situation
Have mini goals to over come
