How to avoid Tinder ban for BDSM

[JED253]

I made a new Tinder last night and got a warning and my pic/bio taken down for sexual content. How do you avoid this and/or screen properly while avoiding Tinder's annoying ass rules? The pic I was using (first photo) and bio are below:


Bio:
6'1 | Seattle

Blindfolds are much more fun than turning the lights off

-Charming & Blunt
-Dominant
-Brat Tamer
-BDSM
-Deep tissue massages
-Have an adorable cat
-Weaknesses: Ass and accents

PS: Don't be afraid to say hey, I'll take care of the rest

 

[pancakemouse]

Don't include such explicit photos.

You screen properly by being subtle, not blatant.

I believe someone asked this in another thread, are you ACTUALLY dominant, or are you just following Andy's guide and trying to pretend?

Might be time to take all BDSM references off your profile until you can calibrate accordingly.

 

[JED253]

Don't include such explicit photos.

You screen properly by being subtle, not blatant.

I believe someone asked this in another thread, are you ACTUALLY dominant, or are you just following Andy's guide and trying to pretend?

Might be time to take all BDSM references off your profile until you can calibrate accordingly.

Define 'calibrate accordingly'

 

[pancakemouse]

Don't include such explicit photos.

You screen properly by being subtle, not blatant.

I believe someone asked this in another thread, are you ACTUALLY dominant, or are you just following Andy's guide and trying to pretend?

Might be time to take all BDSM references off your profile until you can calibrate accordingly.

Define 'calibrate accordingly'

I guess have enough awareness to know that putting a blatant photo of a woman's ass with handcuffs on it on a Tinder profile probably isn't OK? You're also way too explicit in your bio. It looks tryhard.

 

[Zug]

Its so overly sexual with nothing else going for it. Anyone that into BDSM is fully in the lifestyle and scouting on Fetlife, not Tinder. The only point in screening this hard is when you literally can't keep up with matches, and even then you'd be better off filtering higher quality girls over text than through your bio. It's not congruent and it doesn't make sense, it doesn't come off as genuine. It gives off poser vibes. I don't know you, that may be just because you're not good at bios, but that's what it comes off as.

 

[JED253]

Define 'calibrate accordingly'

I guess have enough awareness to know that putting a blatant photo of a woman's ass with handcuffs on it on a Tinder profile probably isn't OK? You're also way too explicit in your bio. It looks tryhard.

I mean Andy has a very similar photo in his Tinder guide and literally has pics with half naked girls on chains so yeah, I guess I genuinely am not aware of where Tinder draws the line lol. Although I think I have heard Andy say on a podcast he's gotten banned a few times.

 

[JED253]

Its so overly sexual with nothing else going for it. Anyone that into BDSM is fully in the lifestyle and scouting on Fetlife, not Tinder. The only point in screening this hard is when you literally can't keep up with matches, and even then you'd be better off filtering higher quality girls over text than through your bio. It's not congruent and it doesn't make sense, it doesn't come off as genuine. It gives off poser vibes. I don't know you, that may be just because you're not good at bios, but that's what it comes off as.

Meh, I've gotten all the validation I need from matches and dates at this point, so I'd rather screen as aggressively as I possibly can, especially since I have a problem with attracting more prudish girls. If you have some more detailed feedback on what you'd do to screen, I'd welcome that, since I posted this to get feedback, but I will say your comment seems to contradict Andy's tinder guide because he recommends screening aggressively and says he bangs much hotter women with the BDSM profile (but hey, maybe I'm misunderstanding or taking shit out of context, totally open to being wrong).

 

[Radical]

Been enough guys in Andys coaching that succeed with these sort of pics and harder screening profiles - i can link to their interviews but i dont think Andy showed their profiles as part of it so maybe not much help

Most of them make their own pics with them in it in a way that displays the bdsm aide of things
Best guy to ask that actually uses the forum probably AskTheDom

This pic clearly too explicit
The bio does seem a bit much, Andy and others dont have that much going on in the bio - more like a cheeky reference to it

Yes Andy gets banned every now and again as do anyone using such pics

Zug disagree with you there, in my experience Tinder has tons of girls that are looking for kink/bdsm and are super into the scene type of chicks. There isnt enough volume on places like fetlife to match it. The bio especially does look more like a fetlife sort of bio tho and needs to be toned down

 

[pancakemouse]

Listen: the reason that you're getting reported is that your profile looks incongruent and tryhard. If you look like a milquetoast dude and all of a sudden a girl comes across some BDSM image on your profile, that's jarring. <report>

If some dude who LOOKS like a Dom has such an image, girls who would have reported you just swipe left instead.

You're getting beta-shamed. It's a phenomenon.

BDSM is not some screening mechanism. It's a fetish, a community, and it means a lot more than just some quick avenue to get you laid. Show it some respect and don't ruin it for the rest of us when the girls turn up on the date and you don't actually know what you're doing.

 

[Bman]

Pancake put it best. The photo is way to explicit for the rest of your vibe.

I'm in the BDSM scene, look dominant, and only mention the word "Dominant" in my profile and "kinky" as a green flag I look for. It's enough that those girls will open you talking about BDSM if they are into it.

For Feel'd & Fetlife I'm much more detailed and explicit, listing out everything because women on there are much more intentional about what they are looking for.

Either match the rest of your photos to be more dominant, or be more subtle about it on Tinder.

 

[Radical]

For my kink escapades recently all i did was put the handcuff and chain emojis followed by 'enquire within' in the bio
Like Bman something small is enough on Tinder to get girls in messages asking about it

 

[Zug]

Its so overly sexual with nothing else going for it. Anyone that into BDSM is fully in the lifestyle and scouting on Fetlife, not Tinder. The only point in screening this hard is when you literally can't keep up with matches, and even then you'd be better off filtering higher quality girls over text than through your bio. It's not congruent and it doesn't make sense, it doesn't come off as genuine. It gives off poser vibes. I don't know you, that may be just because you're not good at bios, but that's what it comes off as.

Meh, I've gotten all the validation I need from matches and dates at this point, so I'd rather screen as aggressively as I possibly can, especially since I have a problem with attracting more prudish girls. If you have some more detailed feedback on what you'd do to screen, I'd welcome that, since I posted this to get feedback, but I will say your comment seems to contradict Andy's tinder guide because he recommends screening aggressively and says he bangs much hotter women with the BDSM profile (but hey, maybe I'm misunderstanding or taking shit out of context, totally open to being wrong).

There's a difference between screening and putting up a brick wall. One mention of dominant or kink friendly is enough. When you mention things 4-6 times people assume its your entire personality. Obviously that's unfair, but it is what it is. You can show more dominance through non sexual context if you want to push it harder (leader, takes charge, got your shit together, established, etc. pics of you running events, public speaking, and so on). You can also filter by mentioning traits that are more prevalent in submissive women (I'll make the plans, mentor you, order for you, tell you exactly what to do, etc)

I don't think BDSM is an archetype in and of itself unless its your full lifestyle. Since its neither, it should be 70% of your bio and pics either. I'm all for screening and calling out your non vanilla, but doing it twice in a calibrated way is far far better than mentioning it 8 times.


1 of - kink friendly, non vanilla, rope/chain emojis, are typically more than enough when combined with the word dominant somewhere.