How to stop watching P?

[ziva]

Hey y'all.

Is there anyone here who stopped watching porn or didn't even really watch it to begin with who has tips?
I'm currently on a small streak of a week+ I think, but I want to cut out porn for ever. I've had 2 streaks, both lasting about 2 months, of being porn free in the last 4 years.
The last 2 month streak was summer 2022, and I felt pretty good during it. P fucks with my subconscious mind in nasty ways which I don't like at all (desensitization/PIED/anxiety).

I've tried blockers (worked on streak 1, but I found ways around it), daily affirmations, seeing girls (probably helped the most with the least amount of urges).
Any tips are welcome.

Thanks!

 

[Brother_Tucker]

What else are you doing in your life?

If you don't have any hobbies or passions, your mind will start to get that itch. I'm personally a giant card game nerd. Once I had a focus on a hobby I enjoyed, Porn just wasn't something I was excited to boot up. I'm also having sex on the regular and it's not something I have to work for. If you can strike a balance of entertainment and sex, porn becomes something like beer, something you consume maybe once a week or less.

 

[ziva]

What else are you doing in your life?

If you don't have any hobbies or passions, your mind will start to get that itch. I'm personally a giant card game nerd. Once I had a focus on a hobby I enjoyed, Porn just wasn't something I was excited to boot up. I'm also having sex on the regular and it's not something I have to work for. If you can strike a balance of entertainment and sex, porn becomes something like beer, something you consume maybe once a week or less.

I have a part-time job to fund my expenses and business investments, I go to the gym 4 times a week, I make music ( which I should do more again), and I hang out with friends like once a week (sometimes less). I think the sex aspect, or even dating aspect of my life is what can use a big boost. I've been on only 1 date (2 months ago) since October 2022. I don't even have an actual sex life yet haha. I kissed/fingered a couple of girls last year, but that's it.

 

[Brother_Tucker]

Sounds like your doing the right things, but what are you doing for just fun?

I had to force myself to find a hobby that wasn't just constantly moving my life forward because I kept feeling guilty anytime I wasn't working in a project. If there's a geeky hobby that you like or a sport that won't take over your focus, this will help a lot with that porn itch. You mentioned making music, do you feel the urge to find porn while you're working on tracks? Try putting some time into it and see if that reduces your urge to look up big booty Latinas.

 

[bonzo34]

..

 

[ziva]

Sounds like your doing the right things, but what are you doing for just fun?

I had to force myself to find a hobby that wasn't just constantly moving my life forward because I kept feeling guilty anytime I wasn't working in a project. If there's a geeky hobby that you like or a sport that won't take over your focus, this will help a lot with that porn itch. You mentioned making music, do you feel the urge to find porn while you're working on tracks? Try putting some time into it and see if that reduces your urge to look up big booty Latinas.

I do music for fun, but I haven't recorded any song in like 2 weeks. I can actually get urges while making music, but when I continue to make music during the urge I feel like it gives me more energy. I'm gonna record after my visit on the forums today. Music is not something I do daily though. Whenever I don't workout, work, or hang with friends, I just watch YouTube.

 

[ziva]

I've never beaten it fully before except when I was with someone like a girlfriend or a fuckbuddy for long periods. In that case I've gone like 10+ months with zero porn / masterbation at all, but unlimited sex and orgasms during sex.

It's pretty easy for me now if I'm with someone and have consistent sex but once that goes out the window I still struggle with it.

I hear thisss. I haven't made it past 2 months yet, but at times when I hit 2 months, I was also seeing someone. But now I see it like this: I either see girls all the time and make it easy to not watch porn. Or I have a difficult time laying off the porn whenever I don't see anyone. I don't want to watch porn, so I probably have to see girls all the time? That's a conclusion I came to. What do you think?

 

[ziva]

Man without using kratom it's hard not to watch porn or fap.

One thing that does is help is peeing. Often you don't really need to fap that bad you just have to pee.

Yeah blockers like freedom, self control, cold turkey

I've actually had a bad experience with kratom before. Never doing that again
But most of the time it's the thoughts of porn entering my mind out of nowhere. When they linger there, there's a very high chance I give in at some point of the day.

 

[hush]

I've been on only 1 date (2 months ago) since October 2022

Why?

 

[Sparkles]

You need to break the habit, which can take a long time. I tend to watch porn at night, so having a consistent bedtime routine helps me to avoid it.

If you want a watertight method of blocking it on your devices, you can set up your phone, etc as a "managed device", and set your DNS servers to something like CleanBrowsing or OpenDNS which block porn websites. See
https://www.manageengine.com/mobile-device-management/

 

[hush]

You need to break the habit

Is it really a habit or rather an addiction?

 

[Brother_Tucker]

If it helps, consider watching porn like having a drink. One every now and again won't hurt you. If your drinking 3 pints a night every day of the week, then you clearly have a problem.

 

[Paid Renegade]

Have sex 3-4 times a week (with different girls each time)

Watching porn/jerking off will start to feel like a chore

 

[ziva]

I've been on only 1 date (2 months ago) since October 2022

Why?

For me it was just really easy to ignore my dating life I found out. I'm not saying that's a good thing, but it happens to be so.
I've actually planned 2 dates in the last 2 weeks, but both girls flaked.

 

[ziva]

@ziva

I don't think you should be reliant on sex to avoid porn and masterbation. This is a bad habit on my part actually and has fucked me a bunch of times. Cause if i break up with a girl, i typically go back into my porn addiction. Or if i'm not getting laid or having a dry spell the temptation is also always there.

if I had just stayed disciplined and not fallen back in, my dick would be fucking killing it right now and i could easily hit up a bunch of chicks and go fuck them instead of needing to recover for a bit again.

I was just speaking from my personal exp though. I've never actually beaten porn / masterbation without consistent sex. I think the longest i've made it was around 3 months.

I hear what you're saying. In a perfect world I would also not want to watch porn even if I'm not going on dates. But the next best thing for now is to go on dates so my brain isn't really thinking about porn that much. Maybe in the near future I discover a way that keeps me from watching porn even when I don't date. But for now I don't have that yet.

 

[ziva]

If it helps, consider watching porn like having a drink. One every now and again won't hurt you. If your drinking 3 pints a night every day of the week, then you clearly have a problem.

I've experimented with this a lot. If I watch porn, I give in to the addiction, which I already don't want to do. And after I've watched it once, I am so much more likely to watch it again in the next 3-5 days, even if I don't want to do that either. For me, porn is like heroin. You don't do heroin in moderation, you just don't do heroin at all. This may sound a bit extreme. But if I never feel good after watching porn, why should I even watch it in the first place. Even once in a blue moon. I can have a day where I don't finish all the tasks I would've liked to do, knowing that I will most likely still finish them tomorrow. After this I don't feel bad about missing a day. But with porn it's just not like this (at least for me).

This may be a bit much, but this is genuinely how I feel about all of this haha

 

[ziva]

Have sex 3-4 times a week (with different girls each time)

Watching porn/jerking off will start to feel like a chore

I think (almost know actually) that something like this is the only option I have.
Not watching porn, but also not seeing girls has been next to impossible for me.

 

[Brother_Tucker]

If it helps, consider watching porn like having a drink. One every now and again won't hurt you. If your drinking 3 pints a night every day of the week, then you clearly have a problem.

I've experimented with this a lot. If I watch porn, I give in to the addiction, which I already don't want to do. And after I've watched it once, I am so much more likely to watch it again in the next 3-5 days, even if I don't want to do that either. For me, porn is like heroin. You don't do heroin in moderation, you just don't do heroin at all. This may sound a bit extreme. But if I never feel good after watching porn, why should I even watch it in the first place. Even once in a blue moon. I can have a day where I don't finish all the tasks I would've liked to do, knowing that I will most likely still finish them tomorrow. After this I don't feel bad about missing a day. But with porn it's just not like this (at least for me).

This may be a bit much, but this is genuinely how I feel about all of this haha

Sounds like you have all the motivation in the world to stop. Everyone handles things differently, and if porn is that addictive to you you then I understand you wanting to go cold turkey. Knowing its this bad for you, why do you choose to do it? You don't strike me as the person choosing to do heroine, if you equate the 2, why is this one harder for you to drop?

One of the tricks to quit something, is when you just naturally don't think about it. If all you're doing is thinking about it, the temptation to use it is much greater than if you realise 2 weeks have passed and you haven't touched it. This is why you need to get your hobbies and sex options up.

 

[Hedon]

Hey man I'd recommend using Get Cold Turkey as a website blocker, it works well on desktop. for mobile I haven't found something as good.

Having top quality online dating profiles + cold approach bringing in loads of warm leads would honestly help the most in terms of stopping you watching porn/PMO etc.

For now I would get used to fapping just using your mental thoughts, I mean no fap long term is best but for now just to stop porn donofap for like 1-2 weeks then start fapping just with imagination, no content. After a few times of this you'll get used to it, this way will also probably help make it easier to eventually stop fapping completely. I would really recommend to aim towards stopping fap completely, from personal experience it's a game changer.

 

[Lord Rey]

This thread reminds me that I haven't watched porn for a while now. Can't remember exactly when was the last time, maybe in February, with a girl, just before having kinky sex...

As an ex addicted porn user, I would say that what truly worked for me was to get sexually satisfied. Even when I was in a relationship and having sex daily with my ex, I couldn't stop myself from watching regularly as I was not totally satisfied with her.

Now that I have a lot of kinky sex with a rotation of different cool girls, I don't feel the urge to go back watching porn as I can have great sex and make most of my kinks/fantasies happen for real.

So in my opinion, the solution to the porn problem is to not stress about it, but focus on being busy with productive stuff like working on your goals and building your dream sex life... In the mindset of "relax, you'll eventually stop watching porn when you get enough quality sex".
I know, it's easier said than done, but my point is that counting days without porn and then feeling bad because of relapses isn't helping. I think it's wiser to ignore the porn issue and just focus on stuff that truly matters.