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Lex' progress log

Decided to set my other goals aside (continuing to work but not being the main focus) til i complete my AA programm which I tried years ago and failed at day 14 where I had to do the high fives)
I plan to attack the programm more systematically this time and not rush into the phases.
The reason I decided to do the programm is to overcome a whole bunch of worthlessness issues I have from time to time. The best way to deal with these is by immediately exposing yourself to them and attacking them afterwards through bibliotherapy. I plan to the AA progrmm in combination with Cognitive behavior therapy.

What I hope to gain from the programm:
During the last few months I was working on my dating profiles as well as socializing by going to Parties, Salsa, Yoga, and a whole bunch of other activities. I realized that no amount of exposure to women can help in the long run unless you learn to use the available options as efficiently as possible. The goal is to learn how to properly communicate to women my desire for sex without feeling social inappropriateness for doing so. I consider myself a fairly socially free person to the point of being judged by some people as highly machiavelistic for acting differently under different situations. That is, I am able to act completely lunatic for the sake of fun on a regular basis but am more than able to handle social situations adequately and appropriately. Nonetheless, I feel still the guilt associated with acting more free than others and allowing myself to have the social freedom. Thus I decided to start the AA programm in order to increase my efficiency in approaching women and
overcoming the majority of latent social inhibitions.
 
I decided to sign the AA petition here on KYIL because I use this forum the most.
Because I already created a profile on this forum I will go immediately to day 2 of the AA prorgamm.

Day 2

- My goal and only goal for the next 3+ months is to beat approach anxiety.

- Because that is my ONLY #1 goal and I care a lot about it- I won't try to balance it with anything other than going to work/school/gym.

- Since I'm not trying to BALANCE it with several other goals, I will have more than enough time to do the drills.

- I agree to FORGET ABOUT GETTING LAID (for now).

- I will DO THE DRILL as it is written and leave.
- I will DO THE DRILL as it is written and leave.
- I will DO THE DRILL as it is written and leave.
- I will DO THE DRILL as it is written and leave.

- I will NOT turn the drill into an 'indirect' approach and get deflated if it doesn't go well.




- I will also start a POF (or OkCupid) account and use GLL's or Rooster's guide because I understand that giving myself some online options will decrease my neediness.

(I already use online dating and other options. The AA program should mainly increase my progress in other fields.)

- I will check in on ~daily basis, documenting what day I'm on, what I plan to do and if I did it.


- I understand that doing a Vlog will only help me be more accountable and get better results.

- I will stop ONLY WHEN I have beaten 90-100% of my approach anxiety. (~3-5.5months, @Level 7).

- I will see this through or get professional help for my anxiety and do it again.
(I planned to do a combination of the 2 at the same time. That way I plan to overcome my inhibitions.
My plan is to join the KYIL accountability group the moment I hit a insurmountably threshold in the program. )
 
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