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Ravi, Year 4: Self-Improvement Log - Data-Driven, Incremental Growth [FAMILY TRIGGERS]

MakingAComeback KEEP AT IT MAC. THE ONLY WAY YOU CAN MAKE THE COMEBACK IS TO GRIND (and be nice to yourself through the process). WE ARE HERE FOR YOU

Only big thing I'll challenge you on for now is this:
MakingAComeback said:
I am genuinely a bit worried about my future now, in particular, letting my family down by not being able to have kids and that will hurt my Mum and Dad a lot. I feel terrible about letting them down
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I understand we probably have different cultural pressures and what not, but I do not want a family. I have told my parents that. It was a let down to them for many years, and I learned that I cannot simply live to please them (because that people pleasing hurts me). From what I read, you DO want a family, but these thoughts are not a healthy way to go for that goal. Challenge your thoughts about that because it reads like you are putting a lot of pressure ("grind") on yourself to please them and burn yourself in the process. Regardless, we support you
 
Just some general thoughts for the sake of inspiring new ideas:

1. Cold approach is only one way to go about this. I get why people say it's the holy grail, but if it's your only option, it just reinforces that the only way you can get attractive women in your life is if you hunt them down. Is there maybe a formula you can create to bring them to you, even if it takes a bit longer to cultivate?

2. I notice you put a lot of pressure on yourself to figure the woman stuff out. Me being not too experienced either, I can see why it's important, but I do believe there comes a time where you may be holding on to it so tight, that you can't step back a bit to see if there's another way. Have you recently given yourself time to just stop everything and see if there's a better way to go about this? (I mention this because I think everyone's winning formula is truly different.)

3. You're still early on in your self improvement journey. Remember to be kind to yourself, and don't speak things over your life like not getting married or having kids. I'd say embrace the possibility that it very well might not happen, come to terms with it, then allow yourself to still move forward towards your goal anyway.
 
Right now failure is an unknown and an abyss, and that's causing you anxiety and dread---it does not have to be. You have a plan for success, and now I encourage you to have a plan for failure.

If you fail at this venture, what will you do with yourself? Maybe you'd live that digital nomad life, adventure all over and experience everything, scale up a business and have colleagues and friends all around the world, bone hot European hookers whenever the mood strikes. I don't know man, that seems like a pretty sweet life. This 'life of failure' might even be better than your current 'dream life' of a relationship, in which you inevitably spend evenings sitting on a couch next to a girl staring at her phone while Netflix plays dumb show after dumb show.

Anyway, really---plan for failure. Rock bottom can be sweet if you properly plan for it.
 
Yo bros

Thanks for your posts

Regarding my long term goal: I am too stubborn to let that go, it's something I myself want, hence, it just will have to happen or I'll die trying. There are other avenues to explore, but the ones that are most attractive to me, are cold approach and online dating. If I am able to make those work, then I will be happy regardless of where my life goes. I have put in the work, I will see it through to the other side.

Last night was tough. Had a big adrenaline dump from being back approaching, that threw me into an anxious state, hence a lot of fear.

Heart was racing until the small hours. So, sleep, was fucked.

The journey towards anything worth having, can be difficult.
There are some days, and some nights, in the god damn grit, suffering. That is going to happen.

This is where, the only way I have been able to get through these things in life, is grinding......

When Talent Runs Out: What To Do When You Don't Have What It Takes To Succeed - Raw Grinding Ability

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1tupnWJ8Mk

Yes, this shit is looking just FUCKED at this point.

You CAN'T feel bad about this, about poor outcomes, poor results. This is where you need FAITH.

Has any of this shit ever come easy, worked the way it was supposed to?

No..........

The only way I know how to get through this, is just consistent forward pressure, being relentless, to the point at which the Universe just starts to cave and give in.

I cannot tell you why it has to come to this.

This is all I know.

And that is what is going to have to be done.

What I know about success, is you need to have a fervent, almost delusional, religious belief that it CAN BE DONE.

It's not sex that I care about. If I wanted that, I'd see an escort.

It's not the idea of being able good with women and "solving the puzzle"

What drives me, is the idea that a guy who is one of the most extreme hard cases of all time, could, through sheer force of will alone, find something inside that allows him to overcome all obstacles placed before him, and suceed.

That is the stuff of legends.

If I can start turning this around, and I will know when I have done it, that will be fucking awe inspiring.

I've been approaching for YEARS. Have done more than 5,000, and have gotten nothing from it.

I've been going at online dating for years, I got 9 lays in 2022, mostly absolute trolls (apart from 1), kept working on myself, kept improving my photos, and still online dating is freakin' god awful. Been on it daily for 8 weeks without ANY leads. Yup!

What drives me, is there is someone else out there, who reads my log, who also gets shafted for no fault of their own, who reads this thinking, god dammit, that motherfucker is STILL GOING

That, in and of itself, is fucking amazing. It makes me genuinely happy just to be able to write that sentence. To be able to say, despite all this, I am still here, still going strong, and just fucking REFUSE to be defeated. Epic shit. That is what gives me the fire to go harder, to keep pressing forward, to persist and persist and persist, because ultimately, this is not fair, this is no way to live, and human beings deserve companionship and to be valued. Trust me, they f**king do. I will turn this situation around somehow, and then, more importantly than anything else, I will be the one who proves it can be this fucking bad and hopeless, and you can still make it. That is the only reason I kept going. Because I am here to prove a point: that unattractive/ugly, low SMV, discarded males get to make it to.

FUCK anyone who tells you otherwise.

We also deserve a life worth living.

I will find a god damn way to make it happen and I will be hammering 7 days a god damn week until the Universe just gets out my fucking way

KEEP WORKING BROS

MAC
 
DAILY CHECKIN

THE IRONWILL PROJECT: MONEY, MUSCLES, MINDSET

WEEK 28: FRIDAY 07/07/2023

(1) Money:
-Serve clients
-Network: 50 Comments / 500 Adds
-Content: 4 posts for today (1 done)
-Content: 4 Reels
-Side Project: (i) Niche research, (ii) VA Company research

(2) Muscles:
-Gym: Arms
- OMAD, DHA, Supps

(3) Mindset:
-Read: $100 Million Dollar Offers
-Mindset Training: 30m
-Cold Approach: 5 Quality Sets A Day
-Online Dating; Tinder Platinum (renew), Hinge: Swipe all profiles, Set up Badoo
-Night Game: Head out pretty late, hit the rave venue again.

Others:
Ice Bath (10m)
Stretching

Notes:

The hot Asian chick I met at the rave weeks ago, is still replying and has agreed to drinks tomorrow. FUCK YES.

The power of just staying with it.............for durations that will make people question your sanity lol

-MAC
 
MakingAComeback said:
DAILY CHECKIN

THE IRONWILL PROJECT: MONEY, MUSCLES, MINDSET

WEEK 28: FRIDAY 07/07/2023

(1) Money:
-Serve clients (DONE)
-Network: 50 Comments / 500 Adds (FAIL)
-Content: 4 posts for today (1 done)
-Content: 4 Reels (FAIL)
-Side Project: (i) Niche research, (ii) VA Company research (FAIL)

(2) Muscles:
-Gym: Arms (DONE)
- OMAD, DHA, Supps (DONE)

(3) Mindset:
-Read: $100 Million Dollar Offers (DONE)
-Mindset Training: 30m (DONE)
-Cold Approach: 5 Quality Sets A Day (DONE)
-Online Dating; Tinder Platinum (renew), Hinge: Swipe all profiles, Set up Badoo (FAIL)
-Night Game: Head out pretty late, hit the rave venue again. (FAIL)

Others:
Ice Bath (10m) (FAIL)
Stretching (FAIL)

Notes:

The hot Asian chick I met at the rave weeks ago, is still replying and has agreed to drinks tomorrow. FUCK YES.

The power of just staying with it.............for durations that will make people question your sanity lol

-MAC
Click to expand...

Some DONE

And a LOT of FAIL!

Day was alright, woke up later due to shit sleep, got my ass down the gym, worked hard, did good biz work, and was going strong AF

Went to do cold approach. 7 approaches. 1 number. Chick was quite attractive. Sent text - message not delivered. Fake number, damn! ;-)

Came back from approach, fully intending to just eat, and then work, and hit the clubs.

Got into a 3 hour convo with my housemate, Paw, lost momentum and now just going to bed.

I feel like the conversation was needed, it was fucking awesome, we went strong for hours, about self improvement, how I found Andy back in the day and lurked his log on GLL, how I used to follow Thebastard for years on GLL and read his threads, so, so many times in the darkest parts of my late teens early 20s, sometimes crying myself to sleep just hoping I could somehow do what The Bastard did and turn my situation around.

So many years later, how far I have come man.

It is still a struggle, of course, it is hard to just even get a lady to send me one line of text.

It never was going to be easy, we opened pandoras box, always was going to be fuckin chaos!

At the end of the day, a guy who is about a 5, is never going to have a good time dating in the modern SMP. Couple that with being brown, and I am probably about a 3! Hence, yes, the only option left is extreme grinding and playing the numbers game until I get lucky.

With enough work, I have gotten lucky here and there though.

And I will find a way to make it happen again.

Sometimes I stop and dream for a moment

What if I could pull it off, and actually get to the point, where I can, occasionally, not necessarily frequently, but occasionally, actually find a gal who wants to know me?

That will be absolutely legendary from the hardest hard case of all time - would be a legendary achievement.

I did my best today.

Will be back tomorrow, and will try again.

This is an exercise in god damn FAITH

13 years I have tried to find a girlfriend LMAO. 13 years and I STILL keep going. Still get rejected out the ass, daily, still no matches, no leads

STILL SHOWING THE FUCK UP BECAUSE EVEN A DOG LIKE ME DOES DESERVE TO BE VALUED TOO

KEEP WORKING BROS

MAC DADDY
 
We can only go forwards, one day the pain will make sense and navigating the smp will seem easy.
 
Will do todays writeup tomorrow.

Solid day!

60m cardio

5m Ice bath

Content: Shot 4 long form + 1 vlog

Cold approach w/ Paw: 3 approaches, including a 2 set w/ Paw.

Date confirmed. We had lunch, and then headed home.

Chilled. Quick ice bath.

Did the date.

Pulled!

Tried physically escalating, she was sat on my bed, had my arm on her back, slowly escalating. She then had to go - she did flag, when I pitched to come to my place, that she has to leave at 10pm. I didnt flinch, and tried regardless. Pulled her back.

Girl was incredibly nice, total sweetheart, and I enjoyed it a tonne.

We have made plans to hang out next week, at the Boba place she works at. "I'm going to make the most gorgeous Boba, for gorgeous Ravi"

She was really into me. Asian girl (from Mongolia), 23, very cute.

Really had a good time. On the date, we did talk sex, BDSM, kink, and so on. She's kinky, and also, bi!

A Grand Slam Offer LMAO

Well, I will try to get a lay with this one, she was very much into it, and a super nice girl. Let's see.

Paw walked past, as he went to do some sets at a local bar, and took a picture. On his way back, he went to see if I was still there, I wasn't, so he knew I pulled.

When the girl left, Paw just entered, so he said hi to her as she left lol

The crazy thing is, the guys at the bar I frequent, notice me, and every time I go, they ask me, "You are here with a new woman? You are a local Casanova, the guys here talk about you"

LMFAO

I've only brought 3 girls there. When I pulled Ruki, and went to pay the bar guy, he said "Banging again tonight?" LOL. I have not been laid since November 2023.

When I talked to Paw about this, he said something interesting.

"No one we know, sees you as a guy who can't get laid dude. Most people, say you are a cool guy. The guys at the bar, don't read your log dude. They don't know. They think you're a slayer, because you're not far from being one. Just get your body and game right"

That was pretty cool.

Paw has around 70 lays. He is focused like me, and honestly isn't too worried about girls, over the years he's ran through a lot, without always going "all in", so he's got much of it down and doesn't care that much anymore.

Some people, definitely have no problem getting laid at all. Very cool.

I hope to join them. Will work, daily.

I'm grateful to this lovely woman, for being so cool to me, and helping me feel better about myself. It meant a lot.

........Now to see if I can close the deal.

If I get lay 10, after the 10 month dry spell, it will be a KYIL story for the ages lol.

It will come.

MAC DADDY
 
Crisis_Overcomer said:
MakingAComeback said:
Will do todays writeup tomorrow.
Click to expand...

Honestly, what you wrote so far is good enough. I'd prefer you to do 15 approaches than typing a 5,000-word novel about this date.
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damn right

fuck the perfect writing on the forums, enjoy life outside
 
Thanks all for the posts.

Hear you re. posts. Will keep it more concise.

90 Days of FOCUS commence tomorrow.

90 Day Focus: Day 0 [Sunday 09/07/2023]

-Mindset Work: Hung w/ Paw, conversations for a few hrs
-Ice Bath
-Day Game: 2 / 5 (Writeup below)

2 / 5 (IG Exchanges)

Notes:

I am still getting back into flow. I am not feeling confident again, just yet. There is some resistance, and some approach hesitancy. I’ll work up to 10 daily approaches. Today, with Sunday volume, 5 was the best I could go for.

Session Report:

Did I work on my current sticking point? Yes.
What did I do well? Opener, was less spastic. Vibe and speech, slower, more controlled.
What could I have done better? Sets feel platonic AF. Not closing the distance. Not sexualising. No real sexual threat.
What will I improve tomorrow? Will work on the opener, and improving vibe.

Self-Analysis:

(1) Opener, still too bunched together. Bad. This girl, was a very sweet, shy, nice type of chick. I tried to stay as cam as possible, and deliver more slowly. As the set went on, she did start to give me some IOIs. She was super resistant to exchange, and the best I could do, was get her to take a pic of my IG! No worries.

(2) Opener, again, not good, because getting her to stop was a pain in the ass, and she was trying to dip. Bad set.

(3) Opener, bunched together, because of a shit stop. She was hard to stop, and she would’t hook. She did have a bf. She was giving me nada in the set. Tried to just work it and make something happen hence talking a bunch. Vocal delivery, was slower as I grounded into the set. Her answers were so weak, as she wasn’t invested. You can skip the audio for this one, get to about 10:30 as this set was a waste of time. Onto the next.

(4) This girl exchanged, she was quite nice. IG exchange.The audio here, is bad, due to wind it seems.

*5, I didn’t record, but had a good and long set with this Irish chick. She exchanged IG, and also, watched my IG stories, but didn’t reply just yet or follow back.

Note:

Ignore where I talk about recording. That is for my chat.

-MAC
 
AskTheDom said:
Crisis_Overcomer said:
Honestly, what you wrote so far is good enough. I'd prefer you to do 15 approaches than typing a 5,000-word novel about this date.
Click to expand...

damn right

fuck the perfect writing on the forums, enjoy life outside
Click to expand...

This is such a valid point that i never thought to give to Ravi

He could claw back a chunk of time in his day if he kept log posts shorter

MakingAComeback notice how Andy stopped logging some time ago. He started writing blog articles and making content instead of spending time on forum posts. Activities that pushed the needle towards more revenue
 
Understood bros will keep it short & sweet.

DAILY CHECKIN

THE IRONWILL PROJECT: MONEY, MUSCLES, MINDSET

WEEK 29: MON 10/07/2023

ACTIONS

(1) Money: CONTENT DAY
-Long Form: 4 LF & 1 Vlog
-Reels: 15 Reels Shot & Scheduled (FB, TikTok, YT)
-FB Posts: 15 Posts written & Scheduled

(2) Muscles:
-Gym: Chest & Tris (DONE)
-OMAD, DHA, Supps
-CT (5m)

(3) Mindset:
-Cold Approach
-Online Lead Gen

Others:
-Message The Bastard, who is coming over on the 13th of July, my birthday lol
-Stretch

Notes:

How to win in life:

(1) START TODAY
(2) FOCUS ON 2 MAJOR GOALS AND A 3RD BACKGROUND FOCUS
(3) GO ON THE F**KING ATTACK

Rinse & repeat daily for 6 months.

We'll win.

KEEP WORKING BROS

-MAC DADDY
 
Why can't we just keep dating simple and make it a simple numbers game, just hit on hot girls be direct, if they reject find someone else, who cares if you have a million rejections when you can have 1 hot girl who loves you?
 
Morrigan1998 said:
Why can't we just keep dating simple and make it a simple numbers game, just hit on hot girls be direct, if they reject find someone else, who cares if you have a million rejections when you can have 1 hot girl who loves you?
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Hey bro,

The Screening Mindset. Very good mentality.

But, all is easy to write and to say.

To actually DO, to actually EMBODY.

Well, that's a different story.

How many approaches have you done in this manner - it should be at least a few thousand, imo.

Remember, I have legit done 5,000+, and am still rolling ;-)

The numbers game is king, but you need a lot more than numbers..............

MAC
 
Hi Mac,

Keep up the god tier grinding! Been lurking for a while before signing up and you inspired me to setup a log here.

I recall (EDITED) having a good article on troubleshooting cold approaches, you might want to look at that and see if it helps
 
MakingAComeback said:
Morrigan1998 said:
Why can't we just keep dating simple and make it a simple numbers game, just hit on hot girls be direct, if they reject find someone else, who cares if you have a million rejections when you can have 1 hot girl who loves you?
Click to expand...

Hey bro,

The Screening Mindset. Very good mentality.

But, all is easy to write and to say.

To actually DO, to actually EMBODY.

Well, that's a different story.

How many approaches have you done in this manner - it should be at least a few thousand, imo.

Remember, I have legit done 5,000+, and am still rolling ;-)

The numbers game is king, but you need a lot more than numbers..............

MAC
Click to expand...
I got a gf since last year just by spamming social media without giving a shit, by my standards she's my type and hot af to me, so I didn't approach more but my problem with your approach is what else do you even need more than numbers? Who cares if you don't say something perfectly it doesn't make that much of a difference, I've accepted that most girls don't like me and I'll get rejected so who gives a shit if I get rejected a million times if I land 1 who I find hot?
 
My problem with what this forum has become is that it pushes game too much and I absolutely hate "learning" Game beyond screening and numbers, I do not want to be "cool" Or impress people, I don't want to be anything other than myself, if that means more rejections that's perfectly acceptable.
 
Morrigan1998 said:
My problem with what this forum has become is that it pushes game too much and I absolutely hate "learning" Game beyond screening and numbers, I do not want to be "cool" Or impress people, I don't want to be anything other than myself, if that means more rejections that's perfectly acceptable.
Click to expand...

It’s great that you were able to find a girlfriend you’re happy with without learning game. But game is there to bridge the gap for those of us are unhappy with the girls/results we get and enable us to get what we desire. It goes without saying that learning game ect goes alongside Looksmaxxing also
 
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