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Thrice log. weird saturday night

Didn't find many items on HeM today, tried 3 pair of jeans, didn't notice much difference between regular and slim fit and between size 31-32 and 32-32.

I only found green(!) t shirt, tried anyway, size small looks good, it wraps around the bicep making it look bigger but it also shows the fat i still have on my stomach, need to get abs to flatten that area


https://imgur.com/a/Kx1qgmc

Tried some sweatshirts also, don't think i look great
pancakemouse said:
Well, I can gladly tell you that your insecurities are "all in your head"/mental health related, because you look GREAT in photo 4
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Thank you, i know well I'm those type of incels fucked up in the head, at the same what i say is true, woman do everything they can to avoid eye contact and my resentment keeps building up. I'm a human not an animal

MakingAComeback said:
You have potential to find a nice gal
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Thank you brother

I gave up on woman in that area, i don't care about nice gals. I have been through a lot and it damaged my mental health. There is no nice gals, woman are just woman just like cats are just cats. I will never marry or live with a woman under the same roof. My goal is just fun and sex, if my appearence allow that.
 
Last weekend i went to this club https://www.instagram.com/mu.club.parma/?hl=en

It was full of young hot girls, i was a bit sheepish and i didnt approach, if only i had one friend i would not felt so embaressed...

I noticed that a lot of hot 18-24yo girls have boyfriends that are nothing special, low bodyfat for sure, but i dont even think they have abs because they are low in muscle mass too, the girls look super hot while the guys look awakward...i think they just met in social circle, the guys are nothing special but most of them are naturals, meaning they do what we talk about here without knowing, line wearing accessories for example.
But i did not see male models to be honest...

This is show the importance of finding a way to get into the night life and start getting a cool social circle, also i need a friend, it would be cool to get a social circle but if im able to find that like minded cool guy than we will be able to do anything we want

I think Chris talked about the fact that if you want to meet cool people you have to look cool too, so i have to work on that...there is not articles i remember he said that on the forum
 
So i decided to start this new phase, ill post once a day until my first tinder lay

Feel a bit embarrassed for beign such an old unproductive member, but Andy's philosophy is you have infinite tries, if you give you ll just have a life of regrets

This new phase is simply me posting everyday not giving a fuck about the fact that nothing significant happened, just post what i did for that day, even if its nothing

Today woke up late, 10am, prepared the room fpr the airbnb guest, welcomed the guest at 11.30am, went buy groceries, now I'm going to ikea to buy some havier duvets for guest because it's getting colder and i don't guest to feel cold and leave bad reviews

After that i will clean my home gym

See you tomorrow guys
 
Your top priority needs to be mental health. You are essentially attractive - lower BF%, good facial aesthetics. Sure you aren't "jacked chad" enough to reliably get girls to invite you straight over off of Tinder, but you are definitely attractive enough to successfully casually date.

There's simply no way that the thoughts you express here don't MASSIVELY impact your vibe. Chicks will always be able to read that and that will hold you back. You need therapy, deep fucking healing, and if you could find more hobbies / non-sexual social outlets that would probably help you a ton.

I realize that way too many people are probably telling you this. It's normie advice. I got out of my blackpill-esque pit through therapy and antidepressants, and that was one of the best developments in my life. I'm off of antidepressants now and have a solid number of lays. I firmly believe that mental health HAS to come first.
 
Woke up late today, 10 am, starting from tomorrow i will use a wake up light to eake up earlier

I found out immediately that i recieved a bad review across all areas on my airbnb, this is the all business i have and it hurts to recieve a bad review for no reason, i did all i can to make this bitch feel comfortable, replied to all her stupid texts ecc and she gave for across all areas.

I texted her and asked what when wrong the bitch didn't reply, so i called airbnb and they said it happens, some guests think that 4 stars on airbnb is like 4 stars on hotels, they don't realise that is bad on airbnb

I wish I could smash that bitch head in the wall

Now when you fuck and have friends you don't even notice this small things, but in my case I'm very reactive and snap easily.

I cleaned the room and recieved the new guests, cool guys unlike that old soviet bitch, they will stay for 3 days so for the next 2 days i will have time to take new pictures

-workout, push day, good intense workout even if i needed to cut it short for lack of time

Thank you ytlord for your advice, agree with 100%, of course mental health is first, if the computer that controls us doesent work you can't do shit in life.
I'm aware I'm not normal in the head and never been, but there's no magic "healing button" I'm not pushing. I believe depression is biological so I'm taking meds from a good professional, i believe that therapy is one of those things that work only if you believe in it... And i don't believe that talking to someone can change brain chemistry, therapy is one of those bluepill non scientific bullshit.

Also i know from experience that 90% of therapist are females, they get scared because they don't like our ideas, all they can tell you is beauty is in the eye of the beholder and than laugh about you when they do back home after work

A good thing would be finding a good male therapist, i might start searching once i have enough money to try it out and see what happens
 
Thrice said:
A good thing would be finding a good male therapist, i might start searching once i have enough money to try it out and see what happens
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Get the free book here https://www.ninglicopy.com/bulletproof-mindset

Highly recommended, has helped me be less reactive, angry, and negative. The book works, as long as you work the book
 
Thank you Crisis_Overcomer i ll download the book!

Woke up late today 10 am because the wake up light didn't work, i fixed it so it should work tomorrow

Workout pull day, good workout upper back focused

Didn't take pictures i will do it tomorrow for two reason
1) i will have more time tomorrow because it's my rest day and i don't have to workout

2) i used today to clean the kitchen and the gym, which is the place were i also sleep to be able to rent the room on airbnb, there is so much mess and like jordan Peterson said everything starts by cleaning your room

The good thing is that now i like to post every day for the first time ever, lets see what i can achieve keeping myself accountable

See you tomorrow
 
Woke up early, repaired my phone, bought new jeans from hem and shoes from zara, didn't practice photography
 
Woke up early, went to the dentist, cleaned the room, it needed some deep cleaning after hosting a group of animals from south Italy.

Training : pull day, good workout, cooked my meals and went to work
 
Yes was rest day, no workout

Had to prepare the room for a guest, a lot of work, almost 2 hours ironing linens, after that went to work

Not exactly the exiting life i dream of, when i was going back home from work late at night i was so angry seeing all the girls to the clubs and me living another lonely Saturday night

I don't when i will find a friend and get abs but what i could do is grow some balls and go to the clubs alone and try to meet girls and socialize

The idea is so scary to me, i fear beign judged even if i know that fear is mostly irrational, no one gives a fuck and if i meet a girl that likes i can just tell her i was with some friends that went home early

This is what i can tell myself to grow some balls and go out alone:

-girls age so fast, the girls i liked few years ago look like shit now, so even if some 18/24 judge me it doesn't m matter, she will age anyway and man keep going from generation to generation of new woman

-we are 7 billions, i don't count, my ego thinks people look at me and ask themselves why is this guy alone, it's not true. We literally don't count in the grand scheme of things

-I'm just in this small city in north italy by chance, i could be in berlin or london or dead in a car accident or never born at all

- man do bold things and test their limits, woman are weak and protected. My ancestors fought huge animals and went extinct when tried to compete for land and resorces with homo sapiens 50k/100k. Knowing this the idea that I'm scared to go out alone and approach a tiny weak creature is absolutely ridiculous
 
Hey man,

I can relate to a bunch of your struggles, whether it be the gloomy days or the approach anxiety. I would love to come home on Monday, with a pretty ginger woman waiting for me in my bed, on Wednesday there would be a brunette with a bush, on Friday a Taylor Swift looking blonde, and on Sunday a wild Inuit women. I think a lot of my gloom comes from woulda, coulda, shoulda, and it would be healthier and more poignant to focus on what is and what is not, and most importantly what I can do today.
Last Friday I went to a college bar and I drank a beer and left. Fine. Good even. The next time I go to the bar, what is the smallest next step I can take to fucking a cute girl. Like I don't have to fuck the hottest girl on campus the next time I go out, but I can definitely just say 'hi' to a cute girl. What is the smallest step that you can take today, tomorrow, or the next day that you go out that will help you to reach your goal or to be in the moment?

-Samuel
 
DavidStone said:
Hey man,

I can relate to a bunch of your struggles, whether it be the gloomy days or the approach anxiety. I would love to come home on Monday, with a pretty ginger woman waiting for me in my bed, on Wednesday there would be a brunette with a bush, on Friday a Taylor Swift looking blonde, and on Sunday a wild Inuit women. I think a lot of my gloom comes from woulda, coulda, shoulda, and it would be healthier and more poignant to focus on what is and what is not, and most importantly what I can do today.
Last Friday I went to a college bar and I drank a beer and left. Fine. Good even. The next time I go to the bar, what is the smallest next step I can take to fucking a cute girl. Like I don't have to fuck the hottest girl on campus the next time I go out, but I can definitely just say 'hi' to a cute girl. What is the smallest step that you can take today, tomorrow, or the next day that you go out that will help you to reach your goal or to be in the moment?

-Samuel
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I agree with this. What if step #1 was to go to a club, grab a drink and just take in the environment? Then gradually build up from there.
 
natedawg said:
I agree with this. What if step #1 was to go to a club, grab a drink and just take in the environment? Then gradually build up from there.
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Baby steps are under-rated.
My life is seriously starting to turn around, but I only focus on baby steps.
Jordan Peterson has always been a believer in baby-steps. "Aim Low".
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YL7rZTV0nHw
 
Thank you guys for the ideas ImChuckBass natedawg DavidStone

I don't drink because i dont wanna ruin gyn progress, i have phenibut i can use and i can ask for zero coke in a drink glass so it looks like I'm drinking a cocktail

I'm afraid i will embarrassed looking at all those hot young girls with their friends while I'm there alone, the ideal is to find at least one male i can talk too

- didn't log for two day because the last bitch i hosted on my airbnb said it was too cold and couldn't sleep, i was all freaked out that she could write it on the review and ruin the entire season so i tried to take some steps to make to room warmer without spending a fortune becauee gas prices in europe are scary

I bought a temperature sensor from amazon so i can monitor room temperature and be able to defend myself from bad reviews from too demanding guests and also bought windows and door insulators to raise the temperature

I know this is not ralated to getting laid yet but i have to take care of the making money part

Next monday i will have a guest for 11 days so i will have plenty of time to take pictures
 
I'm tired of bending over for guests to get 5 stars, everytime i have a notification of a new review I almost have anxiety attack, this is because airbnb suspended my lisiting once when i recieved 2 stars and i see airbnb the only way to make way money to buy forniture for the house and a car i can use to go out and practice night game

I have another two gets, I'm thinking of blocking the calendar and just lift and pratice photography, i still have enough money to pay bills and buy food, i feel stressed from this airbnb stuff and maybe a pause to take pictures would be a good thing

I started in may, it's been 7 month on airbnb, i forget how it's like to chill on your own house without having to bend over for an overdemanding guest

The problem is the room i rent is a beautiful room, if a match a girl i can fuck her there, but the rest of the house is gross, without proper forniture

On 23 novembre i will pay the third and last installment of my canon eos rp, a camera i bought 3 months ago and tried only once because the original idea was to make another 5k on airbnb for forniture and car

Whats your advice?
 
Thrice said:
The problem is the room i rent is a beautiful room, if a match a girl i can fuck her there, but the rest of the house is gross, without proper forniture
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Unless it's absolutely gross, it doesn't matter much. As a student, for like 6 months, I lived in a room so small that the bed took up like 80% of the room. It was literally: bed then table then wall. It was an old place too and I had annyoing roomates. But, when I brought a girl to the place, it's not like she is going to not have sex just because I live in a small, ugly place. At that point, it's too late (and she might not really care).

Ultimately, solve the problem you have and not the one you think you might have. So focus first on bringing girls to your place.

Thrice said:
i feel stressed from this airbnb stuff and maybe a pause to take pictures would be a good thing
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I doubt you are too busy to take photos while doing the aribnb stuff. Honestly, if I were you I would consider doing a 365 tinder photo challenge (1 photo / day). Yeah most of them will suck because you won't have time to go somewhere interesting but you will get better and you want to post everyday anyway.

With that said, idk how busy you are. Maybe a break is a good idea regardless.
Thrice said:
this is because airbnb suspended my lisiting once when i recieved 2 stars
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Did the customer have any valid complaints? Or was it all bs. If they did have some valid complaints and you fixed them then you should be more relaxed about this. But yeah I get that this is stressful.
 
almost30 said:
Did the customer have any valid complaints? Or was it all bs. If they did have some valid complaints and you fixed them then you should be more relaxed about this. But yeah I get that this is stressful.
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It's fucked up, yea they had valid complaints and i worked so much to improve everything, after that i still developed a fear of bad reviews, so after learning about the most common comlaints on airbnb forums and airbbnb reddit i bought a door sensor

Basically i try to be transparent so the guest feels he's alone in the house, after working out i wait for them to go out (i check the door sensor on my phone) and go and use the bathroom and cook, i leave at 5pm and never go back until the day after. The house is small and try to give them their privacy

The reason os because i imagine receiving a review like "not much privacy, the bathroom is shared and the host lives in the house too" will plummet the bookings, specially from woman, i want to reach that 10k mark before relaxing

On the listing i use some stratigic ambiguity, they don't if it's a private house or not
 
Thrice said:
I don't drink because i dont wanna ruin gyn progress, i have phenibut i can use and i can ask for zero coke in a drink glass so it looks like I'm drinking a cocktail

I'm afraid i will embarrassed looking at all those hot young girls with their friends while I'm there alone, the ideal is to find at least one male i can talk too
Click to expand...

Few notes from working in, seeing people who are *wildly* successful in the night scene, and starting to see some of my own (9 girls this year through some version of night game) :
1) if you're trying to fit in, you wont. Don't ask for your coke in a cocktail glass - get it in whatever they give it to you in. Detail doesn't matter, the point is no one cares that you're not drinking alcohol *right now*, I do this all the time, no one gives a shit whether it's a beer or cocktail or coke or whatever. If someone asks just tell the truth, you're working on your body and alcohol screws it up. Long as you don't sound judge-y about them drinking few people care.

2) You will be embarrassed at some point. On some level we're all here (kyil/gll/mpmd/etc) because we're embarrassed about NOT having gotten laid on the regular since we were younger. The environment at bars and clubs is *designed* to pull that out of you: to get you to pay to get in, pay for drinks, pay for girls' drinks, etc. We (the guys running the door) usually don't worry about getting the cool guys and hot girls to pay (to get in, or we'll even offer free drinks or something if they're undecided if they want to come here), so OTHER people come in & buy more drinks.
The stakes are *super* low any given night, go out a couple times a week for three months and THEN worry about being comfortable/fitting into the environment. First couple times you wont, and that's fine, you dont have to.
Upshot is, you'll have to deal with that embarrassment at some point. Same way it probably felt embarrassing to walk into the gym and pick up an empty barbell or 15 pound dumbbells the first day, it's GOING to feel embarrassing at first, and that's fine. Don't try to solve for it in the moment (or "learn" anything from it, this is THE WORST TIME to try to learn any life lessons, they'll all be wrong, or at least unhelpful). Go through it and feel it, much like the pain and soreness the first time lifting hard, it hurts but gets easier the more you do it.
 
Also on therapy, I haven't read most of your log so don't know all the context, but definitely looks like you also have really unhelpful thoughts (all women are X, etc)
Therapy isn't magic woo-woo that changes your brain chemistry, but it's also not just some old guy in a leather chair saying "tell me about your mother..."

If you have a good therapist (and who they are makes a HUGE difference), it's more like training for a sport. They'll help point out where your thoughts get kinda "derailed" and (at least for me REALLY helpfully) point out assumptions you don't even realize you're making, that sort of thing.

Better analogy might be trt (or steroids), if you have defective body chemistry (I did, went through this whole thing ~1-1/2 years ago!) then you won't get anywhere without chemical intervention, but, if you JUST go on meds it will only mak it possible for you to make progress, it won't undo all the damage and lack of progress from before. You still have to go through the same process, learn the same things that others did years ago, only now you have years of wrong ideas/lessons to undo first.

Been in therapy a little over a year now and (in addition to other things), it HAS been a big change in many ways. Like last weekend, I went out to bars totally sober, didn't drink anything all night, but had a good time and got a hot bartenders #. Next day I got two instas and two #s (one of them called me wednesday, literally said shes horny and wants to fuck), again sober.
Would have been unthinkable last year that I could talk to people without at least three drinks in my system, but slowly getting there. Also just quality of life when I'm not actively aiming to get laid has gone up a lot, I generally don't feel *as* shitty most of the time. Still a long ways to go, but actually getting there rather than just stewing and hating myself.

Point being I'd give it a fair shot before dismissing it outright. It's not some homeopathic/astrology/spiritual bullshit, it's more like education or training. Nor is it an alternative/competitor with medication, it's part of (or at least can be a step along the way of) a solution that incorporates both.
 
Fuck it i will go out to this club tomorrow, it's only 15/20 walk distance from my house. I feel anxious and scared just thinking about it but the opposite of going is just to rot in my house until I'm too old and full of regret anyway

No goals, no approaches, just go there and listen to music, when everybody will be talking to each other i will just be standing there awkward, who cares at least it's proof i have some balls. Time is running out. Need to feel some adrenaline, felt dead inside for too long.

I talked about therapy with my doctor last week and said pretty much the same things you just said, she also said that she knows some very good therapist and can ask him for a discount If i want to do it

See you tomorrow for an update, let's hope i have some balls

Fuck it i will go out to this club tomorrow, it's only 15/20 walk distance from my house. I feel anxious and scared just thinking about it but the opposite of going is just to rot in my house until I'm too old and full of regret anyway

No goals, no approaches, just go there and listen to music, when everybody will be talking to each other i will just be standing there awkward, who cares at least it's proof i have some balls. Time is running out. Need to feel some adrenaline, felt dead inside for too long.

I talked about therapy with my doctor last week and said pretty much the same things you just said, she also said that she knows some very good therapist and can ask him for a discount If i want to do it

See you tomorrow for an update, let's hope i have some balls

https://imgur.com/a/h3z1YR7
 
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