Thrice log. I need advice on how to move forward with a girl

[Perseus]

Or go to a 3rd world country and swipe on Tinder.

Yeah. Here in SE Asia Im permanently on 99+ likes but filtering the girls with actual potential has been such a chore that I decided to swipe left on every non western girl. Its a literal first world problem, but only getting 1 like a day from girls that are actually into me would actually be easier to be honest.

 

[Squilliam]

Yeah. Here in SE Asia Im permanently on 99+ likes but filtering the girls with actual potential has been such a chore that I decided to swipe left on every non western girl. Its a literal first world problem, but only getting 1 like a day from girls that are actually into me would actually be easier to be honest.

Believe it or not I can actually relate to this issue too. I get a pretty considerable amount of interest from girls I'm not into at all. The amount of girls that I'm into that actually want to go out with me is quite small however. I imagine it's the same deal for women.

 

[Thrice]

Yeah you get a billion likes, but that creates new problems

small violin playing*

 

[Adrizzle]

Now i will get the full sleeve tattoo done and double down on my fuckboy look for the summer.

Idk what your end goals are but I think this is a terrible idea IMO. If you’re not able to sexualise with girls yet, looking more fuckboy will not help with this at all. This might become a negative - girls will expect you to be a fuckboy, ie a level of escalation/game and if you don’t display that they will ghost. Hell girls can fucking notice that shit within 5 mins via body language. (Also tattoos are stupid fake veneer bullshit)

Save the money to put to logistics, car, mental/physical health.

Good to see you taking action man

 

[Thrice]

Now i will get the full sleeve tattoo done and double down on my fuckboy look for the summer.

Idk what your end goals are but I think this is a terrible idea IMO. If you’re not able to sexualise with girls yet, looking more fuckboy will not help with this at all. This might become a negative - girls will expect you to be a fuckboy, ie a level of escalation/game and if you don’t display that they will ghost. Hell girls can fucking notice that shit within 5 mins via body language. (Also tattoos are stupid fake veneer bullshit)

Save the money to put to logistics, car, mental/physical health.

Good to see you taking action man

should i dress like a sexless nerd to be congruent with the fact that i don't know how to sexualize? In this type of communities it's called fake it till you make it, i will improve my fuckboy look and become one. Girls are ghosting anyway and 90% of matches don't even reply. I don't see how the situation will get worse because you look like a fuckboy, it can only get better and dressing like a fuckboy and having tattoes is my real style anyway even if i was born gay or asexual

 

[Squilliam]

should i dress like a sexless nerd to be congruent with the fact that i don't know how to sexualize? In this type of communities it's called fake it till you make it, i will improve my fuckboy look and become one. Girls are ghosting anyway and 90% of matches don't even reply. I don't see how the situation will get worse because you look like a fuckboy, it can only get better and dressing like a fuckboy and having tattoes is my real style anyway even if i was born gay or asexual

Nah, dress like a fuckboy even if you aren't one.

Realize that being a fuckboy or a sexless nerd are not two distinct categories. It's like a spectrum.

I would say my fashion is pretty fuckboy-ish even though my personality isn't really congruent with it, but I notice progress. I don't see any benefit in dressing like a sexless nerd. IMO that just supports the hopeless idea that you'll never be a fuckboy.

 

[Thrice]

Your logistics are definitely holding you back. You should make a plan to get that sorted ASAP. It's way harder to get laid if you don't have reasonable logistics (not having your own place, or living far away etc). Figure out how you can move closer to where your dates typically are.

That being said, you can probably still make it happen. I got laid when I was living with parents or in an inconvenient location. I would fuck girls at their places. Much more of a hassle but it is definitely doable.


AFAIK Holden lives in a fairly inconvenient location and his sex life is popping.

Yes, women can't fully understand our problems, just as we won't fully understand theirs.

I thin Holden is in a big city in europe, i'm in a small town of 200k people. I'mthinking of doing at least one month in a big european city this summer, i will have to think about it and plan very well.

Who knows if a city in the coastal area in italy is good enough considering the large amount of girls from all over the world that come here or a big city in germany or east europe. I have no idea and i will have to do my research.

I don't travel often but i can tell you that Milan sucks in the summer and it's completely EMPTY. I don't know if other italian cities like Rome or Venice could do the job in july or august

yea it will happen and i have to make it happen, today i have the second date with the irish girl. She looks very enthusiastic and looking forward to meet me. i don't know if she wants to use me to visit the area and learn italian or fuck. I told her that my goal is sex on watsap and today will have to make a move. I won't be traveling 1hour again for sexless date. Tomorrow i will hit local clubs and report on that too

should i dress like a sexless nerd to be congruent with the fact that i don't know how to sexualize? In this type of communities it's called fake it till you make it, i will improve my fuckboy look and become one. Girls are ghosting anyway and 90% of matches don't even reply. I don't see how the situation will get worse because you look like a fuckboy, it can only get better and dressing like a fuckboy and having tattoes is my real style anyway even if i was born gay or asexual

Nah, dress like a fuckboy even if you aren't one.

Realize that being a fuckboy or a sexless nerd are not two distinct categories. It's like a spectrum.

I would say my fashion is pretty fuckboy-ish even though my personality isn't really congruent with it, but I notice progress. I don't see any benefit in dressing like a sexless nerd. IMO that just supports the hopeless idea that you'll never be a fuckboy.

Yes agree, but Adrizzle wanted to say something else but there's nothing wrong with dressing congruent with your FUTURE personaly, the one you're building. The opposite is dressing like a sexless guy and reinforce the current personality that you're trying to change.

I agree with his take about tattooes, they are permanent, but i like tattooes anyway. Still if i heard of someone who's going to have tattoes just to increase sex appeal i wouldn't find it wrong at all, i mean who cares. They will increase your sex appeal and as someone who has tattooes i can tell that you end up forgetting you have, not a big deal at all

 

[Perseus]

I won't be traveling 1hour again for sexless date.

Dont use this angry frame of mind before going on a date. Yes its annoying if it happens but you can choose to see it as a fun night spent talking with a girl instead of doing nothing. Not too mention that you can learn from the experience.

 

[Terminator]

I won't be traveling 1hour again for sexless date.

Dont use this angry frame of mind before going on a date. Yes its annoying if it happens but you can choose to see it as a fun night spent talking with a girl instead of doing nothing. Not too mention that you can learn from the experience.

This. Besides a lot of "normal" guys spend countless nights at clubs and bars with nothing more than the hope of getting laid, going home empty handed most nights. If they are prepared to "waste" time like that, so should I.

 

[Thrice]

I think I'm not going to this fucking date, this girl is so fucking annoying, she seems the one trying to "pull", but not me, but a visit to some other city

I mean pancake is a genious, he says on his blog that aupair will waste your time trying to use you to go around

If you thinking I'm overreacting this girl did this on first date and kept trying on watsap

 

[Perseus]

Looks like she is offering to go there on her own.

 

[Squilliam]

I think I'm not going to this fucking date, this girl is so fucking annoying, she seems the one trying to "pull", but not me, but a visit to some other city

Man, I don't see why you're complaining. This girl is literally being considerate of the fact that she doesn't want you to travel super far. You have shitty logistics, so obviously it's hard to arrange a house date.

 

[pancakemouse]

I think I'm not going to this fucking date, this girl is so fucking annoying, she seems the one trying to "pull", but not me, but a visit to some other city

I mean pancake is a genious, he says on his blog that aupair will waste your time trying to use you to go around

If you thinking I'm overreacting this girl did this on first date and kept trying on watsap

She's an au pair? If so, why would you meet in her area, she lives with a family and doesn't have logistics for sex, right?

 

[colgate / bulldog]

I think I'm not going to this fucking date, this girl is so fucking annoying, she seems the one trying to "pull", but not me, but a visit to some other city

I mean pancake is a genious, he says on his blog that aupair will waste your time trying to use you to go around

If you thinking I'm overreacting this girl did this on first date and kept trying on watsap

yea i'm gonna lay this out plainly but what you said seems like the TOTAL OPPOSITE of what her messages read.

it literally looks like she's begging you to invite her to your city and she will travel there for you.

 

[Thrice]

She's an au pair? If so, why would you meet in her area, she lives with a family and doesn't have logistics for sex, right?

she was an aupair in bologna now she works as a receptionist in La Spezia, there's no logistics anyway, all i can do is take an airbnb and make it look like i live there

Man, I don't see why you're complaining. This girl is literally being considerate of the fact that she doesn't want you to travel super far. You have shitty logistics, so obviously it's hard to arrange a house date.

this girl was doing great until she annoyed the hell out of me, asking what we can do, where we could go, a normal date with me is not enough for her she wants to visit places, she likes hiking and she's been backpacking around europe for a 1 year. Even if she likes it means she wants to do both things and it doesent go well with my poor mental health so i told her i don't want to date anymore.

I'm not an animal like them and unlike them rejecting people is not my hobby so i felt sorry when she started sending vocal messages saying she wants to meet me.

I'm over reacting because i'm angry and emotional but it's true that she kept asking to go somewhere and things to do, like i said even if she likes me she wants to do both things and use to go around. For the second date she should've shut the fuck up she just meet in the same place instead of asking for the tenth time where we can go/what to do

Only in this last message she made it look like she doesen't want me to travel, she added a new element so it doesent look she's repeating the same thing


i don't llike her anyway i wanted to date her because i live in a state of sexual scarcity so i have to settle for any girl because unlike them i don't have any access to any intimacy.

I'm looking for a bar now or a club in my area, will update about this. Will also run a boost, maybe i can get an instadate fro tinder

 

[Squilliam]

this girl was doing great until she annoyed the hell out of me, asking what we can do, where we could go, a normal date with me is not enough for her she wants to visit places, she likes hiking and she's been backpacking around europe for a 1 year. Even if she likes it means she wants to do both things and it doesent go well with my poor mental health so i told her i don't want to date anymore.

I'm not an animal like them and unlike them rejecting people is not my hobby so i felt sorry when she started sending vocal messages saying she wants to meet me.

I'm over reacting because i'm angry and emotional but it's true that she kept asking to go somewhere and things to do, like i said even if she likes me she wants to do both things and use to go around. For the second date she should've shut the fuck up she just meet in the same place instead of asking for the tenth time where we can go/what to do

Only in this last message she made it look like she doesen't want me to travel, she added a new element so it doesent look she's repeating the same thing


i don't llike her anyway i wanted to date her because i live in a state of sexual scarcity so i have to settle for any girl because unlike them i don't have any access to any intimacy.

I'm looking for a bar now or a club in my area, will update about this. Will also run a boost, maybe i can get an instadate fro tinder

Did she actually say no to coming to your area? Or are you just assuming?

It's very obvious to me that your toxic beliefs and anger towards women is potentially going to lead to self-sabotage. I see zero problems with the way she's talking. You're treating the slightest indication of non-compliance as an insult of the highest magnitude. This isn't a good way to be.

 

[Thrice]

Did she actually say no to coming to your area? Or are you just assuming?

it looks like you dont understand, i already said it's impossible to understand the situation from that last message that made me snap. You see no problem with the message but i added that this girl started asking for stuff to do/visit from day one. I know it looks nothing wrong thats why i added the context

it literally looks like she's begging you to invite her to your city and she will travel there for you.

yes, and kept asking if there's clubs and stuff to do. I told her to stop and kept asking


https://imgur.com/a/wuMWPOx

-where are you from?
-north

having fun with tinder because it's so easy to find dicks and i have 9999 pending likes. It's really tough for me to deal with this stuff with poor mental health. Every once in a while i think of giving up. the only thing that keeps me going is the impression that i'm close to a turning point

 

[colgate / bulldog]

i can't read pizza language but PLEASE send a screenshot of you inviting her to your city.

it's ok if she ends up saying no and you can rage about her season pass to the cock carousel afterwards, but at least i want to see her response to a real invite!

 

[Perseus]

You are being delusional and are trying to convince yourself that you can only ever be the victim. This girl is being very nice and you are quite literally making up reasons to somehow portray her as some evil and dumb femoid that wants to hurt you.

You need serious help and Im saying this not to diss you but in a hope that you will seek help.

 

[Thrice]

You need serious help and Im saying this not to diss you but in a hope that you will seek help.

you should be really ashamed of yourself, the phrase you need help is an INSULT. It's a way of making people with depression feel different and inferior. There's no objective or immediate cure/solution for depression and mental health in general, even scientist and doctors don't agree on what this help could be and what should they do.

Most people with trauma have ups and downs through their entire life and never heal 100%. Another reason why you should seek help is just an insult. Also people with some form of mental pain are always looking for solution one way or another. No one with some form of mental propblem is doing nothing thats why the generic phrase you should seek help is derogatory and insulting

you should seek help is nothing but an insult unless you are scientist who discovered an objective cure