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TimmyTurner - AA Log

TimmyTurner

Member
Joined
Jun 15, 2020
Thought it would be easier to split out my general log (where it's basically a dumping ground of all my thoughts/feelings etc.) from my current number 1 goal log (creating a new log as each goal is completed).

My current goal is to fucking finally complete the AA program & I can't have another "number 1" goal (as in to say, my main priority) until that's completed (hope that makes sense/doesn't put unnecessary pressure on me).

I plan to post in here daily (even if it's just to say I haven't done anything) whereas in my other log I post as & when I feel like it.

Anyways, yesterday (22/06/2020) was Day 1. Listened to the audio & walked around for about 45 mins to an hour. I've noticed I'm starting to struggle to hold eye-contact when walking past people which had improved in the past. I'm fine with shop attendants so I'm not 100% sure as to the reasoning.

I'm about to listen to Day 2 and I've already been outside for about 45 mins today. Moving on to day 3 (online dating) tomorrow.
 
Day 3 started. I've listened to the audio from GLL. After work, I'll dive into Andys tinder guide and recreate my profiles. Stepping out now for a 30 min walk.

Edit 1: I've read stage 1 of the tinder guide (will write a couple of notes below). I still have a lot of work to do in relation to what was said in stage 1 but I'm moving on to stage 2 & 3 just to fulfil the message some girls part of day 3. I've either posted or linked all photos I have of myself on my phone in here so any feedback is much appreciated.

Stage 1 notes:

Lose Fat/Gain Muscle - Feel like I've overestimated the number of calories I need to actually put on weight so maybe that's why I'm feeling like I'm getting fat. It was near 3000 calories a day. MyFitnessPal estimates about 2690 so we'll see how that goes for about 2 weeks and reevaluate.

Fashion Style - I'm very much into street style but only really ever wear what would be considered fashionable when I'm going out with friends. Day-to-day I usually just wear comfy clothes like a Nike tracksuit (don't judge me, I'm from London). This week I've tried to start wearing better clothes when I go out. Here's some pics just to show the outfit. View attachment 9View attachment 7View attachment 8View attachment 6View attachment 5

Instagram Inspiration - Don't even use my Instagram lol. Going to start looking for some fashion inspiration as well as just using it more in general. I always hear about people sliding in DMs but I thought they were all just capping.

Accessories - I've got earrings (need more), a few necklaces, one rotary watch (bought it a while but rarely wear), two bracelets & a couple of rings. View attachment 3

Hair/Facial Hair - I've posted an upper-body pic in my general log (link) where you can see my current facial hair without me brushing/combing it. Definitely isn't a full beard & I don't shave at all so I'm contemplating whether I should go clean-shaven. Right now I have my dreadlocks out and down. I can tie it up in different styles but usually, I have it braided akin to this (c-19 shut down my hairdressers).

Teeth Whitening - Got some whitening strips at home but haven't used them in a while. Not sure as to the efficacy but I can't really tell as my teeth are badly stained after years of coffee/tea and poor oral hygiene. I've also been wearing some aligners to try and straighten my teeth a bit more as the front two were misaligned after years of sucking my thumb as a kid.

Tattoos & Piercings - Currently have two piercing on both ears (so 4 in total) need to go out and buy some new earring though as I usually just use the same 4 day-in-day-out. I currently have 5 tattoos, all on my forearms but cause I'm blessed with dark chocolate skin there not that visible. View attachment 2View attachment 4View attachment 1

Photos - In the next post I have all the photos I have of myself on my phone. I never take/actively avoid taking photos but as of this week, I've started taking one photo a day initially starting with a picture in front of the mirror or without posing or anything just to get comfortable being in front of a camera. Next steps once I feel a little more comfortable will be to start posing.

I've also saved the self-improvement picture to my desktop and my phone so I can refer back to it often.
 
Haven't moved on to day 4 yet as I hadn't completed day 3 (was too tired to read part 2 of the guide day).

I've read it now, created my profiles on Tinder, Hinger, Bumble, OkCupid & Happn.

Onto day 4 tomorrow.

Oh & outfit of the day:
 
Currently still on day 4. I’ve been making a ton of excuses while outside (e.g. no-one is going to stop and talk with all the social distancing, she looks busy, she’s got a resting bitch face etc.). Defo not giving up but need to put more effort into fighting against the excuses.
 
KillYourInnerLoser I can't see the pictures that people have uploaded. Is this by design?

Seeing the following message : "You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post."
 
Day 4 - 3 women asked for the time in 30 minutes before the heavens opened and I had to go home (it was forecasted to only be light and only 20% chance lol). I listened to Andy's (KYIL) old day 2 video on GLL about giving yourself permission to interrupt and stop making excuses as to why you can't do it which helped. Looking to finish up and move on tomorrow.
 
Don’t know whether to say I’m struggling with day 5 or to accept what I’ve been able to do.

Technically I completed the task of asking 5 then asking another 5 faster last week (split it out into two days), but, I have it in my head that it needs to be done in one day and I want to try get it all done in under an hour.

I feel like the added pressure has caused a decline in performance instead of pushing me to work harder as it’s taking me longer than usual to get started talking to the first girl.
 
Either this shot has gotten harder or I’m regressing. I can get up to and past 5 but doing all 10 in a day is still a struggle.

Back at it again tomorrow taking that 0.01% step forward until I’m done. Going to update the goal once I’ve finished “the slight edge” and Andy’s companion article.
 
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Day 5 is finally done to my satisfaction. Got my hair did and it has done a world of good to my confidence after I stepped out. Was doubting myself this whole week about whether I'm made for this shit and maybe I should just quit.

Onto day 6.
 
Started day 6. Still on the first set but got the time & the time + directions sorted. Took me an age to start as I was wandering around as if I was out on a stroll. Need to focus up more and execute from the beginning. On track currently to meet the goal of completing week 1 by Sunday.
 
Today was a flop. I've got excuses in my head but I'm not even going to pay them any mind. One positive is that I still managed to get myself outside with the intention of trying. Kind of pumped for tomorrow as I know I'll need to go in hard if I want to stay on track for this weeks goal.
 
Asking for the time & directions is fine but I feel weird with the have you been there. It doesn’t feel natural (I know it doesn’t have to) but I keep bailing.

I’ve got ~3 hours today for drills so I hope to come back this evening with some good news.
 
Work's been murder so I've hardly put in any time.

I've changed my minimum daily action from just getting outside to asking for the time which I've been keeping up. Today I was lacking motivation and just wanted to chill but I managed to get myself out and asked for the time to about 8 different girls. Now, just need to stay in the execution mindset and say the rest of the lines and day 6 is done.
 
Kind of neglected doing anything aside from my bare minimum these past few days to spend time with friends. I don't really read/watch the news but I know there are new measures coming in for COVID tomorrow so I thought I'd make the most of seeing everyone whilst I could. Really wanted to have a quiet Sunday and literally lay under the covers watching films but I thought fuck that & fuck a normal life so I got myself out after getting some inspiration from Andy, The Beast & Mr Qs logs.

I wasn't feeling confident at all when I first came out so I basically just repeated day 5 over and over again. Asked about 30 women for the time and realised that just having fun with it makes it sooooo much easier. I've been going about it all wrong in my head, thinking I need to find the women least likely to reject me but once I turned it into a game for myself I found I was enjoying myself without caring about the answers. I was looking at people and saying she's 100% going to say no then be surprised when she gave me the time. Also, I adapted Andy's 10 min rule further for every rep. Could I get one rep in 10? Yes, okay restart timer can I get 2? Yes, reset again. My record was 4 in 10 minutes. I did go into a busier part of the city to test but just being there got me in my head.

Definitely want to carry the same vibe into tomorrow and going forward. Back onto day 6.
 
TimmyTurner said:
Asked about 30 women for the time and realised that just having fun with it makes it sooooo much easier.

Man that's crazy!! I'm still struggling with asking 5 people lol, it took me like 2 hours. But just have to continue practicing
 
I keep forgetting to post daily to keep myself accountable (or rather I'm sick & tired of not having any good updates to post to say I've made progress). I'm unsure as to what my perversion to "Have you been there is" but it's just not coming out. Even when the girl is still standing there, I'm not saying have you been there? but more so you've been there (as a statement) then thanks. Back out after work (workload is starting to get out of hand. Might put in a couple of extra hours early in the weekend to stay on top of it).

The Beast You better fucking get outside and do day 11. I'm trying to catch up but I'm using your videos for inspiration.
 
I know what you mean mate, I'd still say post everyday even if you don't manage to get approaches in. That way you're less likely to go too hard on yourself and potentially go missing for a few days/weeks because you don't feel like you have anything positive to report back with. Plus if you're updating here every day you're more committed to your self improvement journey as a whole, not just the AA programme. Also, are you lifting? That's always been a big help for me if I ever feel like I'm not progressing in an another area, at least I'm still able to push myself physically.
 
Nothing done but except a few times and directions. Wasn’t happy with that so decided to come out again late and I’m currently in a bar alone. My cousin is around local and said he’ll join me but just sitting at a table is weird af.
 
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