So
TimmyTurner said:
The timer went off when I asked someone the time lol
I know that feeling hahah
TimmyTurner said:
Going to have to rethink my deadlines for the AA program for the rest of the month.
Are there no indoor places, shopping centers, malls, grocery stores you can be in? The thing with this program is to just do it every day, and really aim for above the minimum. If this is your Goal #1 like your signature says, then you definitely have to push yourself to do it day in and day out. Yeah, we're going to have bad days. I'm going to have a bad day in the future with the program that's going to make me feel hypocritical for writing this. But the most important thing to me so far is this thing that Chris says: you're going to hit a point where you're not going to be motivated anymore to do it. At that point, you have to choices: you either quit, or you start working harder. Putting in actual work and literally forcing your body to just do the drill. Last year, I started this program, I used COVID as an excuse and picked the first option. This time, COVID's still around, but I'm going with option #2.
But you're dumping a bunch of the logs out at once, so maybe you are going through with it, and in that case congratulations! Disregard what I wrote. We'd still like to hear from you on a daily basis, it really helps with this. But Timmy, if you're taking a bunch of days off, then there might be more important things to do in your life than this. That's fine, priorities are priorities, mostly if it's work-related or something else of long-term importance. Maybe it's hard already. If you get into the rhythm of the program though, like doing it every day and updating us every day, then you build up a momentum. You need that momentum, knowing that on the previous days, you did the drill no matter how horrible and hopeless and dreadful you felt. All you have to do is give it your all, and have fun with people's reactions a little. Take a look at my log, it reads like some stream-of-consciousness novel of anxiety. Felt really hard and important at the time I was writing them, and it still does every day, but at least I'm feeling that anxiety for harder and more out-there things. You can do it too.
TimmyTurner said:
got in with the time + directions - they didn't know any coffee shops so I skipped the have you been there, tried again - neither did they. This happened another 3 times and by that point, my momentum had gone and my feet were aching so I called it a day.
Try continuing the conversation even if they say they haven't been there, even when it doesn't make sense. "Have you been to any good coffeshops?" "No." "Did you like it?" "Huh?/I said I haven't./Oh no, I haven't been there." You kind of have to face those reactions when you're saying weird stuff. Don't try to avoid it, drive straight into that wall. You realize immediately that it's not really a wall and nothing bad happens. Just explore how people react when you say nonsensical things. The AA program lets you start small, so just do the program, that's all.
Watch this (thanks KillYourInnerLoser for introducing me to this channel through his log last year) and the rest of the channel's videos. That guy is totally neurotic and awkward, but he does it. Over and over and over and over. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8CpRG-e64E
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