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YEAR 3: THE IRONWILL PROJECT: MONEY, MUSCLES, MINDSET - FROM NOTHING TO SOMETHING, MY RELENTLESS JOURNEY
- Thread starter MakingAComeback
- Start date
- Status
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2021
Thrice said:
Appreciate the good thinking here bro ^^
Pancake, is convinced that I should be able to get some form of result with sufficient game. I don't yet quite believe, my own experience in the SMP tells me otherwise, but he is a wise man, and I'll give it until the end of the year to see if we can get ONE lay with all this effort (lul).
We all kinda know, my look, overall, isn't going to go down super well anywhere on this planet. There is no location where it isn't going to be a total ass-busting hustle.
Culture, brain washing, and just female preferences. You gotta respect it.
I am going to live my life, improve myself, and work on becoming successful. I'll travel the world and just live my life man. I am trying to let go and accept this. I have to make a lot more money, because honestly, I am going to need facial surgeries bruh.
Gotta be done...
Ravi
SpongeBob
Member
- Joined
- Dec 7, 2021
There's a great article of GLL that's titles "she's already fucked an uglier guy than you" or something like that.
I know that your low SMV male identity is printed deep inside you so it's hard to shake it off. But when I look at your video on YouTube and your pictures here I really can't believe that the reason you have 0 success is because of your physique. I see tons of uglier dude walking around with girls by their sides. That's an objective reality easily demonstrable. The reason of your failure at the moment, is not your physique. Not to say that you can drown in pussy, but the good thing is that it's not your goal in the end.
You got this!
I know that your low SMV male identity is printed deep inside you so it's hard to shake it off. But when I look at your video on YouTube and your pictures here I really can't believe that the reason you have 0 success is because of your physique. I see tons of uglier dude walking around with girls by their sides. That's an objective reality easily demonstrable. The reason of your failure at the moment, is not your physique. Not to say that you can drown in pussy, but the good thing is that it's not your goal in the end.
You got this!
Thrice
Member
- Joined
- Apr 9, 2021
Mac is not ugly at all brother, truth is he has a very ethic face, and this should not be a bad thing, in fact it's a beautifull thing that the human race has such variety and you can guess someone's country from his features but madia and culture has associated low status to some ethnicities, the world is dominated by the west with the US as a leader, so of course the group associated with low status are from developing countriesSpongeBob said:
add to that the fact that woman are brainless and absorb like a sponge
I will tell you something else, i often watch arabic tv series, the handsome actor has always wester traits, there's tons of handsome actors that dont look like western but they dont choose them
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2021
Thrice, there is still self improvement, and still letting go and accepting, bro.
Yeah, I mean, we understand where we stack up in time. It is a numbers game.
With large enough numbers, you can sometimes, and yes, it's rare, but sometimes, just meet another human, whom, despite everything, can look past it, and just see that you are human just like them, and that this is enough.
I, as others such as SpongeBob elude to, am looking for love. I am looking for what the legendary Colgate was able to find.
If I could just experience that, because I have never experienced anything close to it (read this log, it's one stuborn mofo who keeps going lol), this will be enough.
Yeah, sure, I am probably a very niche product, and there are probably disturbingly few women in this world who would give me a shot. We know this by now. This does not mean, that they don't exist, and with sufficient grinding, cannot be found.
The mission and one's goals, must be kept front and centre. Even if I was only able to feel it for 5 minutes, and that was it, I would give anything in the world just to know how that feels and I would have gotten what I was looking for.
As Men, stoicism, and acceptance, is key. We have to accept reality. And just roll with it, without suffering in excess.
Life can be abundant, if you look at it the right way, and see it just as an opportunity to go out there and somehow try to make things happen, off your own willpower alone.
Simple........but not easy.
Like everything good in life.
There is still joy to be found in simple pleasures, in friendship, in nature, and in the process of one's growth.
Thanks,
MAC
Yeah, I mean, we understand where we stack up in time. It is a numbers game.
With large enough numbers, you can sometimes, and yes, it's rare, but sometimes, just meet another human, whom, despite everything, can look past it, and just see that you are human just like them, and that this is enough.
I, as others such as SpongeBob elude to, am looking for love. I am looking for what the legendary Colgate was able to find.
If I could just experience that, because I have never experienced anything close to it (read this log, it's one stuborn mofo who keeps going lol), this will be enough.
Yeah, sure, I am probably a very niche product, and there are probably disturbingly few women in this world who would give me a shot. We know this by now. This does not mean, that they don't exist, and with sufficient grinding, cannot be found.
The mission and one's goals, must be kept front and centre. Even if I was only able to feel it for 5 minutes, and that was it, I would give anything in the world just to know how that feels and I would have gotten what I was looking for.
As Men, stoicism, and acceptance, is key. We have to accept reality. And just roll with it, without suffering in excess.
Life can be abundant, if you look at it the right way, and see it just as an opportunity to go out there and somehow try to make things happen, off your own willpower alone.
Simple........but not easy.
Like everything good in life.
There is still joy to be found in simple pleasures, in friendship, in nature, and in the process of one's growth.
Thanks,
MAC
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2021
Today, was pretty solid.
Decided to catch up on life admin, offer work, and have a more focused day.
Was the right move. The life admin I am doing, including resolving my visa situation here, consumed a lot of time. All sorts of silly steps and things we have to take. This consumed several hours, and involved me making some calculated risks.
Has to be done in life.
Hit the gym, did some work, and got into some tasks that needed untangling.
Very productive content call with the boys. We agreed my current approach to YouTube is not going anywhere.
I am making an action plan and will propose 3 different strategies.
Offer work, continues. Likely to go down the route of doing a group coaching, and aiming to get 20 people into it. A weekly call, and lots of great stuff in the group. 3 month commitment. Will change many lives through biohacking, structure and consistency, and breaking through limits using the toolkit I've developed.
All in all, feeling good. Got a date tomorrow, unless flake.
Been a good week overall. Feeling like it was necessary to have a tough few weeks of hustle, hard work, and also some useful mental tests of will.
Came out stronger.
Onwards to Victory.
-MAC
Decided to catch up on life admin, offer work, and have a more focused day.
Was the right move. The life admin I am doing, including resolving my visa situation here, consumed a lot of time. All sorts of silly steps and things we have to take. This consumed several hours, and involved me making some calculated risks.
Has to be done in life.
Hit the gym, did some work, and got into some tasks that needed untangling.
Very productive content call with the boys. We agreed my current approach to YouTube is not going anywhere.
I am making an action plan and will propose 3 different strategies.
Offer work, continues. Likely to go down the route of doing a group coaching, and aiming to get 20 people into it. A weekly call, and lots of great stuff in the group. 3 month commitment. Will change many lives through biohacking, structure and consistency, and breaking through limits using the toolkit I've developed.
All in all, feeling good. Got a date tomorrow, unless flake.
Been a good week overall. Feeling like it was necessary to have a tough few weeks of hustle, hard work, and also some useful mental tests of will.
Came out stronger.
Onwards to Victory.
-MAC
AskTheDom
Member
- Joined
- Jun 4, 2022
I agree although with a caviat: what we resists, persists.MakingAComeback said:
It’s so obsessive this female acceptance that will consume you.
I don’t want to say go on a monk mode but, have you retracted for a second and meditate on your emotional state regarding women?
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2021
POST FOR ANDY:
HIT LIKE AND DROP A COMMENT FOR THE BIG MAN
https://killyourinnerloser.com/forums/viewtopic.php?p=61646#p61646
HIT LIKE AND DROP A COMMENT FOR THE BIG MAN
https://killyourinnerloser.com/forums/viewtopic.php?p=61646#p61646
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2021
Thanks bros for the discussion above.
I do agree with The Dom.
Ultimately, success in life, is about abundance mentality, and letting the pain go, so you can realise your Greatness. This, does come. Scarcity, deep scarcity, can diminish our abundance mentality. During these fallow periods, that is where we must lean into FAITH, and trust in the Universe, or if you are religious like me, trust and faith in God.
The thing is, one's sense in self, and secureness in self, must become very strong. Long periods of nothing, should not disintegrate one's identity and create suffering. Whilst I am now, feeling great, due to my own systems and processes, which get me consistenty making progression in life, the area for development, is to accept deeply oneself and see value in oneself, and the world, just as it is.
Thanks to the bros for the content call yesterday, was really valuable for me. I will post a content game plan for YouTube and Facebook. Will send it to you all and we will decide the best way.
Shoutout Radical, Crisis, Paw, Hedon for coming to the call.
THE IRONWILL PROJECT: WEEK 31
WED AUGUST 4th
MONEY:
-Checkins & Client Work (DONE)
-Onboarding new clients (IN PROGRESS)
-Study Biz & Learn
-Content Machine: Write 3 FB posts
-Content Machine: 3 Shortform
MUSCLES:
-Gym: Arms (DONE)
-OMAD, DHA, Supps (DONE)
-CT – 5m (DONE)
MINDSET:
-Date: Confirmed for 8pm
Notes:
Positive day. The life admin done yesterday, looks like it produced some good outcomes. Great.
Sinking into my core, feeling more abundant.
Life, remember, is SUPER abundant. You can accomplish anything, if you show up a lot, work, and also, learn to truly let go and sink into this with your whole soul.
Joyful productivity is the highest paradigm, achievement, with a smile on one’s face.
Despite the hustle it has taken, I have another day game date now. Superb.
Apps, ticking over. 4 Matches on Tinder yesterday, none I’d want to date, but something. 2 on Hinge, both, I’d want to date. Both, messages first.
Let’s see.
Body progress update, on Sunday.
Hard work, with a positive mindset, pays off.
Mindset, is primary, and the most powerful thing we have.
All is achievable. Just need to stick with it, be humble, learn, implement, and be patient for the whole duration.
KEEP DREAMING
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfdXbJptvos
JUST BRAINWASH YOURSELF TO BELIEVE IT IS INEVITABLE FOR YOU TO SUCEED
-MAC
I do agree with The Dom.
Ultimately, success in life, is about abundance mentality, and letting the pain go, so you can realise your Greatness. This, does come. Scarcity, deep scarcity, can diminish our abundance mentality. During these fallow periods, that is where we must lean into FAITH, and trust in the Universe, or if you are religious like me, trust and faith in God.
The thing is, one's sense in self, and secureness in self, must become very strong. Long periods of nothing, should not disintegrate one's identity and create suffering. Whilst I am now, feeling great, due to my own systems and processes, which get me consistenty making progression in life, the area for development, is to accept deeply oneself and see value in oneself, and the world, just as it is.
Thanks to the bros for the content call yesterday, was really valuable for me. I will post a content game plan for YouTube and Facebook. Will send it to you all and we will decide the best way.
Shoutout Radical, Crisis, Paw, Hedon for coming to the call.
THE IRONWILL PROJECT: WEEK 31
WED AUGUST 4th
MONEY:
-Checkins & Client Work (DONE)
-Onboarding new clients (IN PROGRESS)
-Study Biz & Learn
-Content Machine: Write 3 FB posts
-Content Machine: 3 Shortform
MUSCLES:
-Gym: Arms (DONE)
-OMAD, DHA, Supps (DONE)
-CT – 5m (DONE)
MINDSET:
-Date: Confirmed for 8pm
Notes:
Positive day. The life admin done yesterday, looks like it produced some good outcomes. Great.
Sinking into my core, feeling more abundant.
Life, remember, is SUPER abundant. You can accomplish anything, if you show up a lot, work, and also, learn to truly let go and sink into this with your whole soul.
Joyful productivity is the highest paradigm, achievement, with a smile on one’s face.
Despite the hustle it has taken, I have another day game date now. Superb.
Apps, ticking over. 4 Matches on Tinder yesterday, none I’d want to date, but something. 2 on Hinge, both, I’d want to date. Both, messages first.
Let’s see.
Body progress update, on Sunday.
Hard work, with a positive mindset, pays off.
Mindset, is primary, and the most powerful thing we have.
All is achievable. Just need to stick with it, be humble, learn, implement, and be patient for the whole duration.
KEEP DREAMING
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfdXbJptvos
JUST BRAINWASH YOURSELF TO BELIEVE IT IS INEVITABLE FOR YOU TO SUCEED
-MAC
Thebastard
New member
- Joined
- Jun 11, 2020
jakeD
Yeah I am really similar in this – I think it is normal when you have an incelish past. While all kinds of mindset tricks and exercises can probably help, nothing helps alleviate the average intensity of those feelings like getting results – specifically with those hot girls you covet.
And yes, hot girls shit and fart like any hobo and Chris GLL’s take on it that you need ‘advanced confidence / entitlement’ makes a lot of sense. The sense that you are 100% worthy of those girls as if they were average or below average. Its advanced of course because it assumes you are confident already getting average or 'cute' girls. If we are struggling with putting our incel past to bed, at least most of the time, then this will be too difficult. There is a fine-line between immense confidence and delusion and it can definitely backfire if you don’t get results sooner or later.
I don’t know if you remember Mike Cernovich, but he often mentioned how sometimes he wakes up feeling like the fat bullied kid at school. Of course his has all his gorilla mindset techniques but the point is, these traumatic formative experiences will likely always have some presence in your sub-conscious mind. A wound that never heals, like Frodo in Tolkien getting stabbed by the evil black rider knife.
One thing I am looking into though is ayuascua for healing purposes. Not saying do that but it mght be something to look into doing some research about.
Yeah I am really similar in this – I think it is normal when you have an incelish past. While all kinds of mindset tricks and exercises can probably help, nothing helps alleviate the average intensity of those feelings like getting results – specifically with those hot girls you covet.
And yes, hot girls shit and fart like any hobo and Chris GLL’s take on it that you need ‘advanced confidence / entitlement’ makes a lot of sense. The sense that you are 100% worthy of those girls as if they were average or below average. Its advanced of course because it assumes you are confident already getting average or 'cute' girls. If we are struggling with putting our incel past to bed, at least most of the time, then this will be too difficult. There is a fine-line between immense confidence and delusion and it can definitely backfire if you don’t get results sooner or later.
I don’t know if you remember Mike Cernovich, but he often mentioned how sometimes he wakes up feeling like the fat bullied kid at school. Of course his has all his gorilla mindset techniques but the point is, these traumatic formative experiences will likely always have some presence in your sub-conscious mind. A wound that never heals, like Frodo in Tolkien getting stabbed by the evil black rider knife.
One thing I am looking into though is ayuascua for healing purposes. Not saying do that but it mght be something to look into doing some research about.
Manly Cockfellow
Member
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2022
- Goal
- Start a Family
- Age
- 39
- Motto
- Own Your Insecurities
MakingAComeback said:
MakingAComeback said:
Stoked you found them helpful my friend.
You can and will have an amazing life with the right knowledge, mindset, help, healing and trust in/connection to your self.
And here's another gem-of-an-article I would have shared already, but only found recently (from Slickbackkhair's awesome log):
https://daysofgame.com/theory/types-truth-bad-vibes-and-the-redpill-attachment-style/
It beautifully outlines the overlap between the red pill, daygame, dating, and attachment issues.
And Andy did a great job interviewing the guy about the article:
https://killyourinnerloser.com/days-of-game/
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2021
EPIC DATE w/ the girl with the tattoos
Will keep it brief as I am about to go run and meet her for a coffee now.
Last night:
Meet at 8pm. Vibe well. She is super cool, it's a good time.
Escalating, vibing, try to pull. She hard declines, no sex on 1st date, etc. I let it roll off and persist a little but can see it's not happening.
The gal is just awesome, haven't met one like this yet.
Lots of fun, lots of making out, she is obv into me and she is all over me tbh. I'm loving it. Kissing her neck, rubbing her pussy.
Date goes on until 130am of us walking around Budapest, drinking gin. We finished the entire bottle man.
I still gave it a cheeky go and tried to invite myself in (lol) but nah.
A fucking AMAZING day on the journey. I was fucking LOVING IT.
Right now, feel totally amazing.
Not looking forward to writing up the feedback from Rags2Bitches. Just reading it this morning I was fuckin cringing, lol. My date game, is ass, and when I am fucking SHITFACED DRUNK, I can only imagine the levels of sheer fucking autism engaged.
The gal, however, just didn't mind.
I like her. She seems to like me too.
Awesome. Off to go see her for a coffee now, and then let's see what we can make happen
MAC
Will keep it brief as I am about to go run and meet her for a coffee now.
Last night:
Meet at 8pm. Vibe well. She is super cool, it's a good time.
Escalating, vibing, try to pull. She hard declines, no sex on 1st date, etc. I let it roll off and persist a little but can see it's not happening.
The gal is just awesome, haven't met one like this yet.
Lots of fun, lots of making out, she is obv into me and she is all over me tbh. I'm loving it. Kissing her neck, rubbing her pussy.
Date goes on until 130am of us walking around Budapest, drinking gin. We finished the entire bottle man.
I still gave it a cheeky go and tried to invite myself in (lol) but nah.
A fucking AMAZING day on the journey. I was fucking LOVING IT.
Right now, feel totally amazing.
Not looking forward to writing up the feedback from Rags2Bitches. Just reading it this morning I was fuckin cringing, lol. My date game, is ass, and when I am fucking SHITFACED DRUNK, I can only imagine the levels of sheer fucking autism engaged.
The gal, however, just didn't mind.
I like her. She seems to like me too.
Awesome. Off to go see her for a coffee now, and then let's see what we can make happen
MAC
Manly Cockfellow
Member
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2022
- Goal
- Start a Family
- Age
- 39
- Motto
- Own Your Insecurities
MakingAComeback said:
Whatever happens man, enjoy it
And if you're nervous about pushing for or having sex (because it's been a while and you like her and really want to fuck her) it's ok to tell her how you feel
I told the first girl I had sex with after my divorce and five-year dry spell that I was nervous because it had been a while, and she was super sweet and understanding about it (we just got in bed and spooned in our underwear like we were going to fall asleep and that got me relaxed and rock hard in no time)
Come to think of it I did the same thing the first time in a bed with my current partner (told her I was nervous, she was super sweet and understanding, we laid down and cuddled, and bam, almost immediately I felt accepted and relaxed and was ready to go)
Whatever happens you will be just fine
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2021
Journaling
2ND DATE W/ TATTOO GIRL: COFFEE, DISCONNECT FROM THE SELF, AND BROKEN ATTACHMENT
Our first date, was Friday. She declined the pull, telling me she’s gone back with guys many times before, and it’s just led to meaningless sex. She told me she’s not looking for casual right now, and is looking for something that could go somewhere.
At this point in my journey, I am pretty f**king sure any form of dating life will not be built, and I am kinda mentally “checked out” from this vision now, and just kinda wanna enjoy what I can get. It ain’t much, but even having a chick to talk to, is great, and beats nothing.
I notice how I just can’t relax during the date, and despite my efforts, I cannot sink into the moment and just get into flow. We’re vibing and having good convo, but there is a uneasiness that I always there, a latent strain, an inner tension.
I notice this, and am practising letting go, but I just can’t stop feeling this low level stress. It’s quite annoying. I decide, I will just sit with it.
120+ dates and this happens EVERY TIME.
With men, I’m comfortable AF. With women, I am low key triggered in a small way, my core just feels tense. It’s not something you can detect on the surface, but it is there, always.
There is an underlying emotional stream of doubt, fear, lack, scarcity…..always underneath the surface.
It is just assumed, and implied, that the girl probably doesn’t like me, and it’s “likely to just go nowhere, another ghost”.
Tattoo girl, however, is a curious experience.
It’s not my first ever day game date. I’ve had, in the past 2.5 years, I think 4 in total. But this is the first one, ever, who didn’t immediately ghost.
And it’s also the first, who made out with me so heavily, for hours, and spent a really incredible night with me, walking about Budapest, drinking tonnes of gin, and exploring each other. Was great.
What I couldn’t help but feel, was just how rare this is.
This happens, basically never.
So when it does, you have to enjoy it. A good dating life, is really only for a small % of men. The rest, need to learn acceptance and, frankly, LEARN TO SETTLE. I think I need to learn to settle also man. Outside of that, when you get small wins, you just have to enjoy it. To the maximum. You have to bathe in it, sink into it, because it may never happen again.
That, is scarcity.
And that is also brute reality and how this works for some men.
Better to enjoy life and let go.
“GIRLS DON’T LIKE ME”
One of the stories I tell myself….
……...Is this true?
No.
SOME, actually do. It is insanely rare, but some, actually do.
My old FWB, liked me as a person. L, though a f**king basketcase, liked me. Did my 2nd date with Tattoo girl, and she, we’re pretty sure, seems to like me.
Here is a pic of me & this pretty little thing. This bitch is cool as fuck.
Some, though it takes fucking YEARS to find them, are just OK with hanging out with you. This, is a W, and you have to enjoy it. I suspect it'll be another whole lotta nothing, but you never know, lol.
We grabbed coffee yesterday, we worked on our laptops together, we made out and she dipped. When we were texing, she blabbed a bunch about how her and her friend let guys take them out, all the time. We texted a little, and she told me she was on her period and having a pad crisis (lol, ok), and how some dudes offered her and her friend a VIP table so she’s heading out. I was nonchalant and didn’t care. Me and Paw smoked a few joints and talked until about 1am.
When I saw her DMs in the coffee shop, it was nuts man. She had over 3,000 DMs. She is a pretty chick, sure. The life of a hot 19 year old. You can’t really care about these things. You just let go.
She is clear about having done lots of casual hookups, but now, she feels like she needs something serious.
Typical female bullshit, and what happens when they see you as a provider ass bitch.
There is no reason to get one’s hopes up. It usually doesn’t work out. I’ll follow effective practice, and see what happens. I’m not going to waste tonnes of time, like I did with L. I’ll pitch another date, and if she isn’t willing to move forward physically, then I won’t play these games. If we’re into each other, we can have a proper dating experience and enjoy each other. If that’s not the case, bye.
I will just stick to the process.
RAIN IN MY HEART: THE ORIGINAL WOUND
There is always this void, a lack, an underlying sense that I am just not good enough, and no one will ever like me.
It may go away for a while, like it did in London, but as deep scarcity returned, it just came back.
How this feels, is this sense that is inside, of a lack of self love, a lack of ease around women, and a sense that I am just somehow inadequate. They pick up on this at their core.
If her core does not feel attraction for you – it is actually over.
That’s the problem. And where I found myself.
If you have an underlying wound, an underlying tension, and there is a disconnect from your own core, Game cannot be delivered. The nervous system, fights it. And it is expressed in sub-communications.
The problem of trying to cheat nature: You can’t. Ultimately, it will win.
RESTORING CONNECTION TO THE SELF: SETTLING, ACCEPTING, AND LETTING GO
This does not mean, Game is not the right approach.
I see no way how a male 5 is going to be able to make anything work.
The work I need to do, is inner, and on fucking restoring my sense of Self.
And if nothing else ever comes to me in my life, just loving myself, will be enough!
Thanks for reading
MAC
2ND DATE W/ TATTOO GIRL: COFFEE, DISCONNECT FROM THE SELF, AND BROKEN ATTACHMENT
Our first date, was Friday. She declined the pull, telling me she’s gone back with guys many times before, and it’s just led to meaningless sex. She told me she’s not looking for casual right now, and is looking for something that could go somewhere.
At this point in my journey, I am pretty f**king sure any form of dating life will not be built, and I am kinda mentally “checked out” from this vision now, and just kinda wanna enjoy what I can get. It ain’t much, but even having a chick to talk to, is great, and beats nothing.
I notice how I just can’t relax during the date, and despite my efforts, I cannot sink into the moment and just get into flow. We’re vibing and having good convo, but there is a uneasiness that I always there, a latent strain, an inner tension.
I notice this, and am practising letting go, but I just can’t stop feeling this low level stress. It’s quite annoying. I decide, I will just sit with it.
120+ dates and this happens EVERY TIME.
With men, I’m comfortable AF. With women, I am low key triggered in a small way, my core just feels tense. It’s not something you can detect on the surface, but it is there, always.
There is an underlying emotional stream of doubt, fear, lack, scarcity…..always underneath the surface.
It is just assumed, and implied, that the girl probably doesn’t like me, and it’s “likely to just go nowhere, another ghost”.
Tattoo girl, however, is a curious experience.
It’s not my first ever day game date. I’ve had, in the past 2.5 years, I think 4 in total. But this is the first one, ever, who didn’t immediately ghost.
And it’s also the first, who made out with me so heavily, for hours, and spent a really incredible night with me, walking about Budapest, drinking tonnes of gin, and exploring each other. Was great.
What I couldn’t help but feel, was just how rare this is.
This happens, basically never.
So when it does, you have to enjoy it. A good dating life, is really only for a small % of men. The rest, need to learn acceptance and, frankly, LEARN TO SETTLE. I think I need to learn to settle also man. Outside of that, when you get small wins, you just have to enjoy it. To the maximum. You have to bathe in it, sink into it, because it may never happen again.
That, is scarcity.
And that is also brute reality and how this works for some men.
Better to enjoy life and let go.
“GIRLS DON’T LIKE ME”
One of the stories I tell myself….
……...Is this true?
No.
SOME, actually do. It is insanely rare, but some, actually do.
My old FWB, liked me as a person. L, though a f**king basketcase, liked me. Did my 2nd date with Tattoo girl, and she, we’re pretty sure, seems to like me.
Here is a pic of me & this pretty little thing. This bitch is cool as fuck.
Some, though it takes fucking YEARS to find them, are just OK with hanging out with you. This, is a W, and you have to enjoy it. I suspect it'll be another whole lotta nothing, but you never know, lol.
We grabbed coffee yesterday, we worked on our laptops together, we made out and she dipped. When we were texing, she blabbed a bunch about how her and her friend let guys take them out, all the time. We texted a little, and she told me she was on her period and having a pad crisis (lol, ok), and how some dudes offered her and her friend a VIP table so she’s heading out. I was nonchalant and didn’t care. Me and Paw smoked a few joints and talked until about 1am.
When I saw her DMs in the coffee shop, it was nuts man. She had over 3,000 DMs. She is a pretty chick, sure. The life of a hot 19 year old. You can’t really care about these things. You just let go.
She is clear about having done lots of casual hookups, but now, she feels like she needs something serious.
Typical female bullshit, and what happens when they see you as a provider ass bitch.
There is no reason to get one’s hopes up. It usually doesn’t work out. I’ll follow effective practice, and see what happens. I’m not going to waste tonnes of time, like I did with L. I’ll pitch another date, and if she isn’t willing to move forward physically, then I won’t play these games. If we’re into each other, we can have a proper dating experience and enjoy each other. If that’s not the case, bye.
I will just stick to the process.
RAIN IN MY HEART: THE ORIGINAL WOUND
There is always this void, a lack, an underlying sense that I am just not good enough, and no one will ever like me.
It may go away for a while, like it did in London, but as deep scarcity returned, it just came back.
How this feels, is this sense that is inside, of a lack of self love, a lack of ease around women, and a sense that I am just somehow inadequate. They pick up on this at their core.
If her core does not feel attraction for you – it is actually over.
That’s the problem. And where I found myself.
If you have an underlying wound, an underlying tension, and there is a disconnect from your own core, Game cannot be delivered. The nervous system, fights it. And it is expressed in sub-communications.
The problem of trying to cheat nature: You can’t. Ultimately, it will win.
RESTORING CONNECTION TO THE SELF: SETTLING, ACCEPTING, AND LETTING GO
This does not mean, Game is not the right approach.
I see no way how a male 5 is going to be able to make anything work.
The work I need to do, is inner, and on fucking restoring my sense of Self.
And if nothing else ever comes to me in my life, just loving myself, will be enough!
Thanks for reading
MAC
Adrizzle
Member
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2021
MakingAComeback said:
Motherfucker! Stop stealing my inferiority complex hahaha.
I know the feeling Mac.
I can overcome this and you can too. I’ve deep down always felt “not good enough”. Shit when I was editing for Andy I would apologise and say I’m not good enough. Andy had told me like 6 times now I’m a great editor and I’m starting to believe it.
It’s crazy how a negative mind is literally our own worst enemy. But the flip is that I can change me and I get to change me. Time to kill my inner loser.
Keep crushing MAC!
Manly Cockfellow
Member
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2022
- Goal
- Start a Family
- Age
- 39
- Motto
- Own Your Insecurities
You still have a lot of false, self-defeating, intimacy-destroying beliefs, but I can tell you are making progress on understanding yourself and healing your mindset
You're like the dumbest smart guy I know...
This girl really likes you man!
Hot young girls don't spend all night making out and getting handsy with guys they view as provider-ass-bitches!
And she probably wants a relationship in the exact same way that you want lots of sex, because you both believe those things will make you feel loved and validated and desired and relaxed and accepted and like deep down you are both actually loveable
And unless she's already treating you like a sugar daddy, try seeing her desire to take things slower and establish more intimacy as the compliment that it is, because what she's really saying is I can have sex with almost any guy I want, but I could see myself having sex and sharing a bed with only you for a long time, maybe even forever
It's actually hard for me to think of a higher compliment than that, but many of us are so insanely insecure we see the compliment of a woman wanting a relationship with us as an insult!!!
Of course I do this too...
I shared a bed with an absolutely stunning woman for probably five years before I realized she actually loves me and would rather fuck me exclusively than everyone else
Now we're talking about marriage and like an idiot I keep feeling like she's trying to trick me, instead of hearing what she's actually saying, which is: "I want to have your babies"
Probably the highest compliment of all and I'm feeling threatened by it...
Attachment issues are no joke
MakingAComeback said:
You're like the dumbest smart guy I know...
This girl really likes you man!
Hot young girls don't spend all night making out and getting handsy with guys they view as provider-ass-bitches!
And she probably wants a relationship in the exact same way that you want lots of sex, because you both believe those things will make you feel loved and validated and desired and relaxed and accepted and like deep down you are both actually loveable
And unless she's already treating you like a sugar daddy, try seeing her desire to take things slower and establish more intimacy as the compliment that it is, because what she's really saying is I can have sex with almost any guy I want, but I could see myself having sex and sharing a bed with only you for a long time, maybe even forever
It's actually hard for me to think of a higher compliment than that, but many of us are so insanely insecure we see the compliment of a woman wanting a relationship with us as an insult!!!
Of course I do this too...
I shared a bed with an absolutely stunning woman for probably five years before I realized she actually loves me and would rather fuck me exclusively than everyone else
Now we're talking about marriage and like an idiot I keep feeling like she's trying to trick me, instead of hearing what she's actually saying, which is: "I want to have your babies"
Probably the highest compliment of all and I'm feeling threatened by it...
Attachment issues are no joke
Manly Cockfellow
Member
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2022
- Goal
- Start a Family
- Age
- 39
- Motto
- Own Your Insecurities
And for what it's worth you look like you could be a very happy and very attractive couple in that pic
If you want to actually take a chance and try falling in love, you can always use science as your wingman on your next date:
https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/style/modern-love-to-fall-in-love-with-anyone-do-this.html
https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/09/style/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html
The links are to a couple NY Times articles and a research paper about scientists that successfully made several people people fall in love with five minutes of eye contact and 36 progressively more intimate questions
If you want to actually take a chance and try falling in love, you can always use science as your wingman on your next date:
https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/style/modern-love-to-fall-in-love-with-anyone-do-this.html
https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/09/style/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html
The links are to a couple NY Times articles and a research paper about scientists that successfully made several people people fall in love with five minutes of eye contact and 36 progressively more intimate questions
- Status