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colgate - FINALLY!!! i get my first daygame lay!!! after 3 years!!!

That is a ballsy approach. Props man. I haven't done something like that yet

Trying to set up a date on the spot or figuring out when they are free is also a good thing to do. I generally scope out when they're free next after I exchange. No guarantee they're actually free tho.

goldfish said:
You should be focusing on the successes rather than failures,
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100% agree. Every approach, regardless of the outcome, is a success. getting a number doesn't matter. It is the approach itself that is important. Sexual outcomes are inevitable if you approach in high volume. So focusing in the approach is what is most important. Rather then being outcome oriented.

colgate said:
I love numbers and what they mean and remembering and recording even girls I pussy out on somehow gives me an incentive *not* to pussy out (by keeping the approach:pussy out ratio low). But maybe I'll remove it at some point when I feel it won't help me anymore.
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I was like this in the beginning. As a beginner you do wanna remember everything. But once you start to get more of a feel for approaching and some more experience. Numbers matter less and just getting into the approach mindset and trying to maximize encounters is what is more important then numbers.

You will get there eventually if u keep plugging away at it.
 
Hit on a girl walking on the Stairmaster at the gym. Then her mom showed up and she was like "I'm here with my mom".

I said "sup" to her mom and still got her number anyway lol.

Totally forgot to try to make plans on the spot though
 
Felt really complacent and distracted for the rest of the day. It's almost like hitting on girls and getting a positive reaction is just some dopamine rush, even if they end up not responding to my text later.

I went to a "Board Game Night" that I found on Meetup, and it was good to just interact with people. Was able to leave on my own terms this time instead of hanging around for too long until things got awkward, so that's an improvement.

tbh, I'm probably not gonna sign up for more Meetups for now though, I feel like it's a distraction from my approaching goals and I already have poor time management. It would be cool to have local friends but I think I need to prioritize getting laid right now.

People still think I look small though, I've been hustling at the gym but I know this just takes time.

Gonna try to actually get some work done now.
 
Thu 8/19/21:
- Work distraction-free for 4 hours - 3/8 pomodoros. really starting to dislike work, i need better time management in general
- Breakfast in 1 hour
- Approach 2 girls
- Finish ironing clothes - finally lol. starved myself of dinner until i did this. had to rewash my clothes because they got a bit mildewy from being wet (i wet iron my clothes)
- Put clothes away
- Dinner in 1 hour

I keep sleeping for like 10-11 hours for some reason. Maybe I'm paying off sleep debt or something. I've been able to go to bed around midnight but I keep waking up around 11am.

I read https://kyil-extra.com/sleep-is-paramount/ and bought some things from there to potentially help me out


Blue light goggles and a wakelight. Hopefully these will help control my oversleeping and undersleeping days.
 
Went to Target again to hit on girls, but I ended up just buying some personal items, and also making some bullshit excuse that I "didn't want to hit on white girls".

Called myself a racist pussy and drove to the mall. I decided to make sure I was not going to buy anything and focus on hitting on girls, which seemed to work.

1 - latina. was wearing a mask but I could tell she was smiling when I called her pretty. shook her hand, but then she told me she had a boyfriend.
2 - white girl with glasses/mixed black+white duo. hit on the white girl. they were kinda walking but i called her cute and they both giggled as they walked away. i was walking away too but i was like "wait, i didn't finish that...". went back up to them and tried an instadate but she declined. handed her my phone and she put in her number. her friend complimented my outfit which was cool.

quick pic of said outfit:
 
btw I know that success with cold approach is basically like <1% (based on what I've seen here) but I would like some feedback on my texting. here's a sample from a girl who actually responded to me. no more messages after the last one as she seemed to clearly make herself unavailable (i think?).
 
Fri 8/20/21:
- Gym
- Put clothes away
- Breakfast in 1 hour - somehow fucked the eggs up, just tossed it halfway through
- Work distraction-free for 4 hours - was easy today bc i had 2 consecutive hours of meetings
- Approach 3 girls or take a girl out - 0/1

Going to a dance class today that I've attended a couple times. I'm really bad at dancing but it's helping me get better with physical contact, and the first time I went, I managed to take a girl out to dinner from there (literal instadate). If I can do that again, I'll call that a win, otherwise I'll have to continue my approaching progress.
 
So at my dance class last night, we basically rotated partners every few dances. I decided to dance with this little girl for a few rounds, and for some reason after that she kept coming back to me and trying to teach me more dances (she was taking private classes, and I'm very new to dance).

Later I was sitting down and she started randomly talking to me. There was this other cute girl who was a little awkward (we danced a bit too), but I thought her shyness made her cute. I told the little girl I'm gonna go hit on the shy girl. The little girl's face lit up and she told me I should take the shy girl to a fancy dinner. Then I was like alright, I'm gonna go do it. The little girl ran back to her mom and I approached. Told her she was cute and wanted to take her out to dinner, but got turned down with a "uh..... I'm not looking for a relationship right now"

While I was hitting on the shy girl, one of the dance instructors was just mingling around and he came to us while we were talking, and then he was like "oh shit, sorry bro" and backed out.

Later I went back to the little girl and the family and I was like yo I got rejected lmao, and they were all pretty supportive (although what they don't know is that I'm playing the numbers game and idc about rejections). The dance instructor came up to us talking too and he was like "yo man I apologize for interrupting you earlier" and I told him he was good, and we shook hands.

I walked out of there really feeling like I was living on another plane. I felt like I had the most social freedom in the world and I was liberated out of my mental cage for one of the first times in my life. Not only am I hitting on girls in public, people actually respect me more if they see me doing it.

I didn't do the other 2 approaches I planned on doing because I ran into a guy I sold something to some months ago, and since it'd be nice to have more friends and an actual social circle, I went to go hang out with him and his friends for the night and chill, and today we're going out for brunch so that's cool.
 
tried to go to the other mall that i scoped out last week, but it's even fucking dead on weekends. so gotta go to my one trusty mall in this damn town.

0/4 at the mall
1 - bf
2 - bf
3 - quad, 2 guys 2 girls. girl i hit on was wearing some weeby ass anime schoolgirl looking outfit. i was pussing out for a while on her but then was like "no man, you NEED to go to them, you can't always cop out". ended up following into a store, the guys kinda split from the girls, but i went up to the girls anyway. idk if they previously noticed me pussing out, but when i called her cute she got taken aback and hid behind her friend when i tried to go for a handshake. probably the "worst" reaction i got so far, but i actually felt a little motivated from that to really feel like i own the place when walking around. it's her loss that she gave me such an antisocial reaction.
4 - duo sitting on a bench, my handshake offer seemed kinda sheepish and she implicitly declined even that and said she wasn't interested

probably #3 psyched me out a bit and i became weaker. i got pretty good reactions from #1/#2 because I just went up and acted confident and there was no pussing out.

run towards your fears
 
It's kind of crazy that even when you realize most people (guys and girls) actually respect you for cold approaching, you still have to rewire your subconscious and natural behaviors. The only people who seem to have a problem with it are obviously antisocial losers.

FUCK antisocial people. I've been their slave my whole life and allowed them to design my really shitty human interaction circuit. I hate that I'm so naturally indirect and tame, and that I'm scared of physical contact. Why the fuck did I let them have a say on my life for 25 years?
 
colgate said:
3 - quad, 2 guys 2 girls. girl i hit on was wearing some weeby ass anime schoolgirl looking outfit. i was pussing out for a while on her but then was like "no man, you NEED to go to them, you can't always cop out". ended up following into a store, the guys kinda split from the girls, but i went up to the girls anyway. idk if they previously noticed me pussing out, but when i called her cute she got taken aback and hid behind her friend when i tried to go for a handshake. probably the "worst" reaction i got so far, but i actually felt a little motivated from that to really feel like i own the place when walking around. it's her loss that she gave me such an antisocial reaction.
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That's an everyday thing. Not kidding.
You'll probably need to experience that another 50+ times before you understand that's 100% normal.

You're never entitled to a good reaction and getting flustered at people for doing normal stuff will just get you frustrated in the end.
 
Went to the mall and intended to try to see how many girls I could hit on in an hour (kinda like yesterday?) but psyched myself out and got 0 after 45 minutes. Probably gonna stick with numerical goals until it's nbd.

Shit day? Rewrite the story.

Then I ate pizza and hit on a girl on the street. She said she had a boyfriend but patted me on the shoulder for my "boldness" lol.

Friends contacted me to go to some music show, and I saw a cute girl with glasses dancing with her friend. After like 20 minutes of ogling her, I was like "the time to hesitate has ceased" and took a step without thinking, and eventually I was over there. She was like "o-oh are you gonna take me out to dinner?" idr my reaction but she put her number in when I handed her my phone.

Also one of my friends happened to know her so I ended up running into her again lol.

Need to get better at doing more spontaneous approaches or else my approaches are gonna remain low.
 
Mon 8/23/21:
- Gym - also 0/1
- Breakfast in 1 hour - switched up my meal a bit so it's more interesting
- Work distraction-free for 4 hours - kinda got sidetracked a few times so 8/8 pomodoros took me a bit longer than 4 hours
- Laundry
- Approach 4 girls - 0/5
- Dinner in 1 hour
 
Hit on one girl at the gym before she started a set but she was engaged.

Then I went to the mall. My time management was pretty bad so I ended up going later than I wanted to, and there weren't that many people.

But I went "out for rejections" and that made everything a billion times easier.

The mall was basically dead so I wasted no time. These next 4 approaches probably took me no more than 10 minutes.

2 - duo sitting down, bf
3 - store employee, walked in specifically to hit on her, bf
4 - walking around, approached within 30 sec of seeing her, bf saw me hit on her haha
5 - another store employee, ditto as 3. also we made eye contact and said hi, but then I walked back to her

Then I was gonna leave, but I saw a bunch of girls out for what looked like a bachelorette party? Anyway I was like I HAVE to approach them, so I reparked my car and started to run over. They were walking away and split into groups, I walked straight to the trio with the girl I was eyeballing and approached.

The other two girls were giggling the whole time I was hitting on her which only motivated me more. Her friend said "what the????" when I asked for the number which was funny (got declined tho with bf).
 
Nothing really special today. Tuesday at 6:00pm is dead at the mall, so I spent more time scoping out locations, but I didn't approach as much as I wanted to.

1 - duo sitting down folding clothes. walked into the store to hit on girl. got number
2 - another employee duo at dillards. they were cackling at something on the phone so I just hit on one of them. she said she had a bf and i kinda joked "not gonna tell you to dump him, but...." this was my most fun one, hopefully next time i can just be straight to the point and say "dump him" directly haha
3 - duo on the street. saw them from a distance and basically maintained eye contact the whole way walking. then i just approached. she said "okay haha" in an awkward way when i complimented her but i powered through for an easy rejection.
4? - employee I've seen a few times at whole foods. really quick and spontaneous as she was helping customers with the self checkout (so much for "self" checkout). turns out she was married lol (now i can stop thinking about her lol) (does this count?? she has checked me out a few times before but this is the first time i hit on her)

Scoped out Target (some cute girls) and Publix (maybe 1 or 2). Downtown was basically dead at 7:30pm. Need to do more scoping so I know places to go for weekday daygame.

Also really want to ramp up the diceyness of my approaches. I've been inspired by Mike Mehlman's rejections videos.
 
I remembered my small ass town has a university campus. Kinda dead at 6:30pm but less dead than the mall is. I'm gonna start going there at like 11-12am when there will hopefully be more volume.

1 - anime ass pink highlight hair with headphones. kinda shy but got number
2 - chick about to start jogging, bf
3 - on laptop, "it's complicated", got number
4 - maybe 4 inches taller than me, but i got needy at her being kind of weirded out and didn't ask for a number after calling her cute
5 - extremely shy "...i'm...not..looking for that right now..."
6 - looks like she plays soccer, said she isn't looking to date but got number anyway

God probably wanted to teach me a lesson about neediness so I ended up forgetting to click SAVE on 1 and 3 so I only got 6's in my phone. In retrospect, I feel like I've been rushing to end the interaction so fast and gtfoing that I forgot that fundamental step haha. Need to slow down a bit and enjoy talking to girls.
 
I went back to the university around noon and the volume was really high. Immediately started approaching girls but yeah it was 0/17. The only one I really remember is some tall black dude saw me hitting on a girl and he was like "ayyy, you miss 100% of the shots you don't take!"

Even if you live in a small town, if you are determined enough you can find high volume places at certain times. I even rescheduled my weekly meetings with my boss so I could go out at noon.

On the upside, I have my second cold approach date on Sunday, so that'll be exciting (first time was in Nashville)
 
oh yeah, I asked one of the girls I hit on to take some pictures of me at the University. I don't have a DSLR yet and this is just to test outfit/location/posing, but basically I walked towards her and she held the shutter button down.

i plan on retaking these with a DSLR later with better framing, but this is what I can do right now. let me know how they are and how my sense of style is
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