Crimson’s Progress Log

[twonightstander]

Hey man, good job on starting the program.

Just one thing, before you start thinking it will take you 6+ months, can I ask you how much time are you allocating every day to do drills? When you sign the "contract" you are basically committing to doing this on a daily basis and it should really be a priority. Like I can't buy that one day you don't do drills because you woke up late, went to the gym and then had a date. Like really didn't you have any available time to get something done?

You can sure move at your own pace and repeat days but at least make sure you are putting enough hours every day/week. If doing the AA program is not your #1 goal you can completely disregard my comment. It has been shared before in other threads but there is a great blueprint in GLL: https://www.goodlookingloser.com/forums/2017-goals/13651-a-simple-blueprint-1a-1b-for-goals. I have been a victim of spreading myself too thin in the past and don't want you to do the same mistake.

You got this man.

 

[Crimson]

Hey man, good job on starting the program.

Just one thing, before you start thinking it will take you 6+ months, can I ask you how much time are you allocating every day to do drills? When you sign the "contract" you are basically committing to doing this on a daily basis and it should really be a priority. Like I can't buy that one day you don't do drills because you woke up late, went to the gym and then had a date. Like really didn't you have any available time to get something done?

You can sure move at your own pace and repeat days but at least make sure you are putting enough hours every day/week. If doing the AA program is not your #1 goal you can completely disregard my comment. It has been shared before in other threads but there is a great blueprint in GLL: https://www.goodlookingloser.com/forums/2017-goals/13651-a-simple-blueprint-1a-1b-for-goals. I have been a victim of spreading myself too thin in the past and don't want you to do the same mistake.

You got this man.

My #1 goals right now are:

- I will have sex with 1 girl (without paying) by December 1st 2022.

- I will pass my theoretical drivers license exam with a maximum of 8 points by December 1st 2022.


I will achieve the drivers license goal in 6 days. Once I’m done with that the AA Program will be my #1 goal along with the getting laid one.

(I know I should forget about getting laid according to the contract, but I already had this goal months before starting the AA Program)

But you’re right, on that particular day I had available time. Even yesterday I only did one drill, when I could have done much more. And thanks for the encouragement.

Crimson

 

[Crimson]

After reading the article that twonightstander send me, it became clear to me that I don’t have my priorities straight.

I'm starting a whole other big goal (The AA Program) eventhough I haven’t achieved my current #1 goals yet:

- I will have sex with 1 girl (without paying) by December 1st 2022.

- I will pass my theoretical drivers license exam with a maximum of 8 points by December 1st 2022.


I can’t do everything at once, it will only lead to inaction. I need to allow myself to let the AA Program go until October 10 (The day of the exam).

I can only focus fully on the AA Program once I‘ve achieved one of my #1 goals. I can’t keep starting stuff and not finishing it.


Crimson

 

[Crimson]

What I did today:

-Studied for drivers license exam

-OLD grind (but nothing came out of it)

-Went out to cold approach (but pussied out on all of them)

-Went to the gym


Crimson

 

[isomar1998]

Hey man

Im looking through your log and its really inspiring to see the amount of progress you've been making. Keep it up!

 

[Crimson]

Hey man

Im looking through your log and its really inspiring to see the amount of progress you've been making. Keep it up!

Thank you man, I will! Wishing you the best on your journey as well.

 

[Crimson]

Date Update:

-Date with Lovoo Girl set up for tomorrow.

-Date with Basketball Girl set up for Sunday.


Pretty cool, looking to bring more girls in as well.

Crimson

 

[Crimson]

Date #4 Lovoo Girl

I call her Lovoo Girl cause I met her on Lovoo (This is the girl that invited me to the club). My first date from OLD, btw.

We meet, walk to the park and chill. After about an hour I invite her to my apartment. She asks why, I tell her I want to fool around with her. She’s hesitant, I tell her I won’t pressure her to do anything she doesn’t want to, she agrees.

Back at the apartment, usual foreplay. Keep in mind she’s chubby. Used some knowledge from the Sex God Method, particularly being more dominant as this is something I lack. Push her onto the bed, make her suck my dick etc.

I undress her and she’s just not… very attractive. Belly rolls on belly rolls. Worst thing of all: HER PUSSY STANK, I ALMOST PUKED. And I still ate her out, because I felt like I had to after her blowing me…

I use pancakemouse‘s method of making her suck me while opening the condom. But the ED perseveres (I jerked off a lot today unfortunately + Another day, another condom wasted ffs) I tell her about it, she’s understanding.

We fool around some more (I blindfold her, she blindfolds me + teases my nipples [which was very hot actually]), she blows me [I teach her how to do it correctly, best blowjob I ever had so far actually] and I eventually just jerk myself off and finish on her thigh (first orgasm in front of a girl ever).

The cum kinda dripped onto her pussy so I wiped it off quickly because I feared she was gonna stick it in her pussy to get pregnant, lol. She also put some of the cum in her mouth which was pretty hot, I guess.

We cuddled a bit and I soon told her I was gonna walk her back to the train station. She asks: „You wanna get rid of me right?“ (half-jokingly), I say no (which was a lie, I wanted her to BEGONE asap), we get dressed, walk to the train station, the end.

I’ve never felt so disgusted about anything sex-related. I wanna cry right now. I heard Bman talk about how he once fucked a girl he wasn’t attracted to and brushed his teeth right after because of the disgust.

Was the same for me. As soon as we separated, I walked back home as fast as possible, brushed my teeth and hit the shower. I still wanna puke. And I gotta sleep in the same bed we fooled around in tonight, lol.



Conclusion: Fucking girls your not attracted to is a bad idea.

I still got to fool around and experience some new things with a girl that was into me though, which is good. Plus, she did give me a lot of pleasure (she tried her hardest to please me). Definitely NOT seeing her again though.


Crimson

 

[Squilliam]

I undress her and she’s just not… very attractive. Belly rolls on belly rolls. Worst thing of all: HER PUSSY STANK, I ALMOST PUKED. And I still ate her out, because I felt like I had to after her blowing me…

Been there man. I literally refuse to eat girls out without getting to know them first now. Definitely have had the urge from time to time though.

Don't ever feel like you have to do any sex acts just because she gave you a blowjob. Vaginal smells aren't always because of bad hygiene, there could be a legitimate problem down there, so you could play it off as a health concern.

 

[Crimson]

I undress her and she’s just not… very attractive. Belly rolls on belly rolls. Worst thing of all: HER PUSSY STANK, I ALMOST PUKED. And I still ate her out, because I felt like I had to after her blowing me…

Been there man. I literally refuse to eat girls out without getting to know them first now. Definitely have had the urge from time to time though.

Don't ever feel like you have to do any sex acts just because she gave you a blowjob. Vaginal smells aren't always because of bad hygiene, there could be a legitimate problem down there, so you could play it off as a health concern.

You’re right man, I’m not obligated to do anything.

 

[Crimson]

Don't ever feel like you have to do any sex acts just because she gave you a blowjob.

This. Sex is meant to be fun, not an obligation - if you don't want to do something, don't do it.

Nice to see you replying as well. I remember you’re article: “You’re not Obligated to Have Sex with Someone”, thanks.

 

[Squilliam]

You’re right man, I’m not obligated to do anything.

When us guys want sex so much it's so easy to focus on getting the girl to want to sleep with you, that you forget that you also need to consent to sex.

As guys we are taught by society that we have to always want sex or we're not manly or whatever. Don't ever feel ashamed for saying no, especially in this scenario.

 

[Crimson]

You’re right man, I’m not obligated to do anything.

When us guys want sex so much it's so easy to focus on getting the girl to want to sleep with you, that you forget that you also need to consent to sex.

As guys we are taught by society that we have to always want sex or we're not manly or whatever. Don't ever feel ashamed for saying no, especially in this scenario.

You worded that really well with the consent. Wether I actually want to have sex with a girl is not even something I think about when I’m trying to sleep with her, good point.

 

[Bman]

I’ve never felt so disgusted about anything sex-related. I wanna cry right now. I heard @Bman talk about how he once fucked a girl he wasn’t attracted to and brushed his teeth right after because of the disgust.

I believe I told this story in MAC's log. Yeah, it was my second lay ever in my life, early in college. I was unconfident then and thought this was the only way I was getting laid. Felt disgusted with myself and immediately took a shower and scrubbed my mouth when I got home. Made a promise to myself to never sleep with a girl I was that unattracted to.

Seriously, at any point up till having sex, you can stop and say you don't want to. Hell, even if you started having sex, you can stop right in the middle.

 

[Crimson]

I’ve never felt so disgusted about anything sex-related. I wanna cry right now. I heard @Bman talk about how he once fucked a girl he wasn’t attracted to and brushed his teeth right after because of the disgust.

I believe I told this story in MAC's log. Yeah, it was my second lay ever in my life, early in college. I was unconfident then and thought this was the only way I was getting laid. Felt disgusted with myself and immediately took a shower and scrubbed my mouth when I got home. Made a promise to myself to never sleep with a girl I was that unattracted to.

Seriously, at any point up till having sex, you can stop and say you don't want to. Hell, even if you started having sex, you can stop right in the middle.

Exactly, it’s just like you said. I should never feel like I have to have sex with someone.

 

[Crimson]

Crimson doesn’t achieve his goal:

- I will pass my theoretical drivers license exam with a maximum of 8 points by December 1st 2022.

This was my goal and I didn’t achieve it. I took the Sam yesterday btw (October 10).



I did pass the exam though. For anyone who cares, I will briefly explain the grading system of the exam:

-The task of the exam is to answer 40 questions about traffic laws correctly (multiple choices, like a quiz)

-For every mistake you make, you get a certain amount of mistake points (the amount varies depending on the importance of the traffic law in question)

-You are allowed to have a max. of 10 mistake points (meaning anything above 10= you fail)



That’s basically it. My goal was to keep the mistake points to 8 or lower, but I got 10. Barely passed the exam.

So while I passed, I couldn’t achieve my goal.



Why didn’t I achieve it?

I didn’t study enough. I knew the exam was coming up, but I was just avoiding the studying. Until the night before.

I had to stay up all night yesterday to prepare for the exam, as I had pushed it to the side until then.

Was pretty stressful, but ultimately led me to memorize enough to at least pass the exam.



Reflection:

-While all that really matters is that I passed the exam, it does kinda sting that I didn’t achieve the goal.

-I wasn’t really obsessed about this goal. While it would be cool to have my drivers license, I mainly set this goal as a priority because my mom wants me to get my DL asap.

-In hindsight I might’ve been better off to have set as the goal to “just pass the exam”, but that’s kinda BS because I had more than enough time to study.



Conclusion:

There are lessons to be learned here.

Focusing on the positive: I didn’t achieve my goal, but I passed the exam which is still really good considering I didn’t study a lot.

Showing humility: When setting future goals, I should take my laziness/flaws into consideration more.

Set goals that I actually care about achieving: Like I said I don’t really care about getting my drivers license (I still want to get it though, just not as a top priority).


Crimson

 

[Crimson]

Crimson will finish what he starts


Although the AA Program is waiting for me, I have one more goal I need to achieve before being able to completely commit to it:

- I will have sex with 1 girl (without paying) by December 1st 2022

One and a half months left until the deadline.



Basketball Girl:

Fooled around with Basketball Girl again a couple days ago. Tied her up (First time I ever did that [did it with a scarf btw, lol]) ect. but wasn’t able to get it up again.

Picked her brains a little bit about what it’s like to be a girl as well, will write about it later as I thought it was quite interesting.

Also told her I’m seeing other girls as it was getting too painful too keep that from her. She seemed to be fine with it.

Tried to set up plans for this week with her, but she said she’s not free.


Crimson

 

[Crimson]

Crimson is struggling:

I’ve been glued to the couch for a couple of days now. Not going to the gym, not even trying to cold approach and barely texting any girls on the dating apps.

I know what I have to do, but I’m just not doing it. I’m pretty sure it has something to do with me not being able to accept that I’m just not that self-disciplined.

I feel like I have to talk to 20 women a day, be able to get 5+ dates a week from OLD, go to the gym everyday ect., which is obviously not happening.

This results in me not taking any action at all, rather than showing humility, taking little baby-steps each day and being fine with that.


Crimson

 

[natedawg]

Crimson is struggling:

I’ve been glued to the couch for a couple of days now. Not going to the gym, not even trying to cold approach and barely texting any girls on the dating apps.

I know what I have to do, but I’m just not doing it. I’m pretty sure it has something to do with me not being able to accept that I’m just not that self-disciplined.

I feel like I have to talk to 20 women a day, be able to get 5+ dates a week from OLD, go to the gym everyday ect., which is obviously not happening.

This results in me not taking any action at all, rather than showing humility, taking little baby-steps each day and being fine with that.


Crimson

Hm, this can often happen when there's a lack of clarity. It definitely affects all of us at times. However, it's impossible to reach your destination without a compass.

What specific goals do you want to accomplish by the end of the year? (I don't see them laid out anywhere in your sig.)

 

[Crimson]

Crimson is struggling:

I’ve been glued to the couch for a couple of days now. Not going to the gym, not even trying to cold approach and barely texting any girls on the dating apps.

I know what I have to do, but I’m just not doing it. I’m pretty sure it has something to do with me not being able to accept that I’m just not that self-disciplined.

I feel like I have to talk to 20 women a day, be able to get 5+ dates a week from OLD, go to the gym everyday ect., which is obviously not happening.

This results in me not taking any action at all, rather than showing humility, taking little baby-steps each day and being fine with that.


Crimson

Hm, this can often happen when there's a lack of clarity. It definitely affects all of us at times. However, it's impossible to reach your destination without a compass.

What specific goals do you want to accomplish by the end of the year? (I don't see them laid out anywhere in your sig.)

It does seem like I’m lacking clarity, at this point I’m not even sure what I want anymore, but this is my goal right now:

- I will have sex with 1 girl (without paying) by December 1st 2022

And you’re right, I should add it to my signature.