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Manga 🇰🇷: October Update

Hear ya man.

I had a BRUTAL day game session a few weeks ago, where I legit was full on hating it

To make matters worse, that was a day I had in person coaching for day game 🤣🤣🤣

The brain is adapting.

Day game, needs to be done consistent. One day per week means you're susceptible to bad vibes.

A little, 3-4x a week, and you get into positive head space out there

I'll chime in more when I return to proper action with girls. I'm at The Doms bootcamp next week, and off to BP for Grind Season Year #2

Many more years to come

And many epic lays

We'll get to where we need to be king

Ravi
 
April 13 (5)

summary
5 approaches
2 total blow offs
2 sort-of blow offs
1 convo

I think Korea is a country where how you stop a girl REALLY matters. I knew this going in, but it's quite difficult.

Anyway I don't want to analyse it too much. I don't have enough data to make any conclusions.


other stuff
- saw 10 different people try and stop the same type of girls I was trying to approach while I was out. Literally 10.
- it was some sort of sales thing. No idea what or why they were going after those girls. Anyway I saw how they would stop people and what would work and what wouldn't.
- High energy stops seemed to do best. Or they would double team and literally put a girl into a corner and talk to her.


Seems like all Koreans have this forcefield around them you have to put energy into breaking. They're used to getting talked to buy all kinds of street hustlers (I think).


Concerns
I am a bit concerned that the language barrier might be an issue. I have to rely on girls to speak English. And it's possible to get better at Korean. But the effort might not be worth it depending how long I stay on this country.

I'm typically out of the house from 9am to 11:30pm. Each day. So time is a resource j have to use wisely.

---
Actually went out last 2 days. But I think that was a mistake because I had no plan too and now I feel like there was no break in my week to have a true night off... Oh well.

Lessons

So AA was significantly less this time around. I think 3 things helped.

1) a deliberate plan to go out immediately after work
2) Building up to approaches by going: Time, Directions, Hit-and-run complement, approach.
3) Being mad actually helped. I was pretty pissed at a chick on bumble for a trivial block she did.



Overall
I still suck and need to get over AA and fix my technique.

Oh ya. Also bought lifetime subscription to Bumble premium. I really would rather not use online to be honest. But the volume helps with an abundance mindset.
 
April 15 (9)


- Felt sick.
- had to take some medicine to get this done.
- umm weak ass energy probably. But I got it done.
- hit my goal of 25 approaches this week. They aren't very good approaches lol. But I got them in.
- AA, not knowing what to do or say is the biggest block rn.



stats

9 approaches
5ish blow offs
4 engagements
1 convo that went past the opener.
0 numbers



Thoughts

Umm idk how to open in Korea. I keep getting conflicting advice from the rest of the world. But everyone says what works in the west doesn't work here. So I'm trying to cater my approach to what they advocate for.

Problem is...

- I don't know exactly what that is. Or how it looks.
- I just know the London front stop doesn't work. And theyre probably right.
- and the opendr needs to be leas direct and just like autistically start into a conversation. The approach is assumed. Nobody talks to strangers in Korea so it makes sense.



lessons

I can force myself to approach.
It was 6:30pm and I was thinking man. I just wanna skip. Not feeling it at all. But just realized I can make myself do it if I get enough reasons to.



other stuff

Went out last night with 2 OGs in Korea. They're kind of out of the scene now.
Pretty cool going out and every single bartender and owner gives you special treatment. Drank so fuckin much. Like 15 drinks about. Made me sick. But just like hearing and soaking in their experiences was pretty eye opening. Seems like if you can manage to put up with the steep learning curve, you basically can sleep with new girls as often as you want, so long as you can stomach the schedule.
 
April 20



new format
for next 30 days


...

Gonna record one 8-10min vlog that has:

1. Video shows proof I scribbles out some thought exercises I wrote out below.
2. Focuses on 1 positive message/lesson
3. Gratitude (might include this in the thought exercise).



These videos are for solely for me.
I'm putting them here for accountability.

...



sick af


Whatever illness I had on my last post got worse.

Skipped work for 2 days. Had a fever for 3 days. Lost my voice. And all the other cold symptoms but on steroids. Not Covid. Not the flu. No fucking clue what it is. Just sucks. Can't wait for it to go away.


No approaches obv.


But it's been nice.

The 3 days of just staring at a ceiling too sick to roll over and watch tv or look at my phone was refreshing actually.

In the same way a lot of pain breaks down the ego, I started to really think more deeply about stuff. I've been grinding so much I never took a chance to look up and think, no pun intended.

I think I realized a few things. Which I talk about in the video a bit.

1... I have a bad mindset about Korea. I more or less see it as a liability. Because I don't see myself permanently settling here, so any career advancement is mute and any girlfriend I get maybe won't stay. (But what a fucked up way of looking at a situation. Just realizing that... I could be going out and bustling, enjoying it, building myself up, and I'm just seeing it as kind of like a black hole that's eating up the limited years of my life. Seriously. Just realized that).

So that explains why I might not have been super excited about Korea, since I got here. I was excited until my first night actually. Then shit hit the fan and I thought. Wow, why the fuck am I doing this? And that feeling never fully left actually. I just stopped noticing it.



2... That fact I didn't notice it kinda brings up another thing. Where is my mindset rn? How did I not notice that or not address that for so long? I think there was this mindset of just power through all the shit I had to do. Fair. But my mindset should be sharp, positive and tough. And it's just not. So why not? Probably because I've made no effort to make it so and haven't bothered really checking in with myself. Like a deep authentic look.




3... I need to schedule time to be positive, to (A) create a good mindset, (B) frame situations well, and (C) find excitement. Those are all distinct activities and I'm not doing any of them.

So this video solves (A), but I'm still on the hook for (B) and (C).

... So

Actually. Huh. Thinking about this. I have a notepad. I'm gonna do one more thing for the video.

When it starts I have show a page with new date or the Day # I scribbled out, followed by a second page with belief reframing exercise about Korea, and a 3rd page of goals written down with 1 quote I like. Then I'll start the video. Might even add the gratitude journal on that. Video still has to be short.



Day 1

https://youtu.be/JzesNi3F4Nw
 
pancakemouse said:
Can you find the Korean daygame community and ask what works for them?
Click to expand...

Forgot to reply.

I know 1 guy who figured it out, and yes I'm talking to him.

And not to be cryptic, we haven't gone out together yet. So it's hard to say what the deal is.
 
Just wanted to chime in and say that I'm really glad you brought up the part about negative influences from friends, social media and so on. It's super hard not to get sucked into this wormhole of complaining and bitching about basically anything that so many people do. The weather, colleagues, women/dating, finances etc. And in my experience it's hard to find people that have a fundamentally positive outlook on life.

I can't remember where I heard or read it, but the idea of interconnectedness - the idea that everything in life is connected on a deeper level - that every living being like plants, humans and animals are all different forms of expression of cosmic/ineffable energy that gives life to everything we know - has really helped me find a lot more inner peace in a otherwise busy life.

Keeping a gratitude journal also helps a lot, especially when you've done it for a while and then re-read what you wrote down months back, making you realize how much you've have to be grateful for.

Hope you get well soon and stay strong!
 
April 21


Day 2

https://youtu.be/PcUoWAJndMM


how the day went

Not much to report
- Worked
- missed out on some 회식 or business boozing. Company pays for eating out. Really wanted to go, but didnt want to make people sick.
- Came home and went to sleep right away. Recording this the next day.


Hard2Focus appreciate the note man.

Ya interconnectedness it's like such a fundamental thing, but you usually don't recognize how much it effects you until much later.
 
Hey Brandon, hope you'll go back to full health soon.

I think the time in Korea is not incompatible at all with your goals. If your goal is to have a quality long-term relationship in the next 5 years, then for example having a relationship that last for like a year while in Korea is super helpful for that. Few people make their first serious relationship last for the long term. Even in that there is an experience aspect.

I'm also working on my daygame, will be a blast to do it alongside you.
 
April 22


Day 3

https://youtu.be/qCBN58CELZ8

Still sick.

Not much to report can't really do much besides read and do minor errands while I recover.

Pretty fun day despite doing next to nothing.

Purged my Spotify to only have cool upbeat music.

Got positivity by Barbara Fredrickson on audible.


---

CainGettingLaid said:
Hey Brandon, hope you'll go back to full health soon.

I think the time in Korea is not incompatible at all with your goals. If your goal is to have a quality long-term relationship in the next 5 years, then for example having a relationship that last for like a year while in Korea is super helpful for that. Few people make their first serious relationship last for the long term. Even in that there is an experience aspect.

I'm also working on my daygame, will be a blast to do it alongside you.
Click to expand...

Thanks bro. And that's great timing man. Ya there's still a lot I got to improve on but I'm definitely going for it now. Once I get over whatever I came down with. Given how long it's been taking to recover I'm guessing I got another week to go before I can hit the streets.

Y'know just from last year I think I can hold a relationship down for a long time. And it's a great experience to have. I think where I'm at now is just getting a high quality girl and not feeling like I'm holding on for dear life to keep her.

As great as the girl I dated last year was, the problem was I wasn't 100% sure if I could get a girl who I liked as much, if not more.
 
April 23


Again no real value here. Just posting to keep the streak of positivity going.


Still sick. Can't wait to get back out there again. Hopefully feel better by the time Devin comes out to Seoul this weekend.



Day 4

https://youtu.be/P5EIV-PDgow

---
 
April 25

Day 5
https://youtu.be/KoAo6IrobtQ


Resting my voice, but I'll type up the message instead.

what I would've said in the video

One thing I realized last year is that I have this super analytical thought process that is perpetually trying to resolve unresolvable uncertainties. Forever and always.

I remember because last year I was mulling over the breakup after I had done it, and it was interesting that I felt like I made a mistake, but even if I made the opposite decision, and stayed in the relationship, I felt like I would've made a mistake.

I kinda feel the same.

And one thing that's sticking out to me. Is that when Im unsure about something, or im dealing with a setback. I can focus on what I am sure about. Whatever future that may be.

And commit to that.

For me, big picture theres really only 2 things I care about.

Having a thriving career. And a thriving relationship. So for those 2 things, I may not know the perfect overall strategy, but with that as the focus the terrain gets a little bit more manageable and I can start coming up with actions I can do today(tomorrow) that will move the needle.


other stuff

Feeling better, but still can't talk.
Literally using a mic and speaker at work to talk. Hopefully be over this by next weekend.

Read 2 chapters of positivity and napped today. Not a whole lot going on still lol
 
April 25

Day 6

https://youtu.be/qW09aMzd2t4
Still resting the voice.


Message
- Hoping I'll be 95% by Thurs or Fri.
- Expecting to be set back for AA tho.


Positive note for today:
 I'm just gonna post a few quotes.


"What man needs is not a tensionless state, but rather the striving and struggling for some goal worthy of him"
- Viktor Frankl

"The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off"
- Gloria Steinem

“Never let a good crisis go to waste”
- Winston Churchill


 
April 26

day 7
https://youtu.be/ElrFzTHMgFE

- Oddly last video I made got 1.1k views on YouTube. Lol no idea why.

- Voice is still gone.

- I'm gonna give it til next Tuesday to recover. If it isn't good by then I'm gonna go to the doctor.




Note


One thing I've noticed recently is I'm getting a lot more positive complements lately. I don't know if it's because I'm paying attention more or if I'm just getting them.

Complements are mostly kids at school liking my demeanor.

Teaching really is a good job. If it paid decent money and had some epic possibility of scaling I would do it for a career.


...


Anyway the voice thing is annoying. I feel totally sidelined from game. But it is what it is. And it allows me to take care of myself.

Think I might take next weekend off and go travel to a smaller city for 3 days.
 
April 27

Day 8 bitches
https://youtu.be/NUwvqnwoGzA
voice is slowly returning, but still fucked. Atleast I can talk now.



What I basically say in the video:

- I just talk about how I want to return to dating and approaching more "holistically. " That word honestly annoys me, but I can't think of a better one. Just doing the work isn't very fun. As I do this I want to do it connected to a bigger positive purpose outside of just getting laid.

- Dunno fully how to do that, but I think it comes back to just mapping out how I was thinking before and treating whatever thoughts I had as thought exercises I concioualy do now.

- If gratitude and positivity changes your overall mindset, I'm sure doing the same for something else beneficial will have a net positive effect too.


Off to bed, Toast, who is more or less dead on this forum lol, is in Seoul. Will be hanging out with him tomorrow. Kinda crazy the first time we meet is in Korea of all places.
 
Manganiello said:
Kinda crazy the first time we meet is in Korea of all places.
Click to expand...
feel the exact same thing, my first "encounter" with toast was hearing him (and i think you as well?) talk about cold approach on various podcasts with kyil_andy while i was driving through a dumpy town in the south while it was raining. he was still in america too

didn't think we would literally meet irl and then have it be in japan of all places, and then i'm also the first person he's met from the forums irl
 
April 28

Day9
https://youtu.be/1S9MRvF5XS0


Thoughts

So this is kind of tricky.


In line of being more purposeful with my dating life.

I'm seeing that the times where was most purposeful, motivated, action-driven... Were usually proceeded by a period of time where all I thought about, exclusively was who I wanted to become and end up in a year.

It was like a 1a goal to think about that.

So this is tricky because I think that means I need to skip out on dating for a month to really ask these questions...

Is that a cop-out or is it truth?
I think it's truth.
I need my mental real estate to be dominated by big questions like "What's the best place I can end up in 1 year" and really feel compelled to answer those... Vs "how do I stop chicks who are walking fast".


... Ughh. Not a comfortable problem because I really do want to jump into game soon. But it's almost like I wanna do that to look good.

... I'll have a better answer on this soon.


Either way. I actually do have time. It's just it also means backing out of prior commitments to go hard in April/May.


Idk the answer. I'm just seeing this as a problem of physics. I can only do one thing well at a time. If I do 2 I suck. So might just bite the bullet.



If anyone has input on this, I'm all ears.






colgate said:
Manganiello said:
Kinda crazy the first time we meet is in Korea of all places.
Click to expand...
feel the exact same thing, my first "encounter" with toast was hearing him (and i think you as well?) talk about cold approach on various podcasts with @kyil_andy while i was driving through a dumpy town in the south while it was raining. he was still in america too

didn't think we would literally meet irl and then have it be in japan of all places, and then i'm also the first person he's met from the forums irl
Click to expand...


Ya dude it's crazy. It felt so weird because it didn't feel weird at all to be drinking out in Seoul and just shooting the shit.


Tho he did meet Sundleboro before. But maybe he meant was a guy who was active on the forums.
 
April 30

Day 10
https://youtu.be/Z8OQ0XmyOaA

Deciding to double down on this.

Feeling very apathetic as of late. So I think it's almost a necessity to really go through the process to sort out a vision.



I had a ton of fun going out with Toast in Seoul. Did a few approaches. Was just cool hanging out.

But I think this showed that overall besides a few sparks I don't really feel motivated overall. So probably doubling down and making getting back to feeling purposeful a major 1a goal is the right move.


If you care enough about something you never need to pushed. You get pulled in by it.
 
May 1

Day 11
https://youtu.be/5Womy2p8s0U


No value here. This post is just for me and keeping self-accountability.




Making decent progress.

Was gonna book a trip to Busan thos weekend but all the trains run at shit times. So Im thinking next month.

Exercises are working. Think I have a pretty good idea of what's what.

- I have a value for growth that's being neglected.
- and the reason it's neglected is because I see Korea as a place where I can't build anything. Any lifestyle gains get wiped as soon as I leave.


Not really feeling anything negative about that, it's actually quite nice to have that defined.


And the other cool thing is that Im seeing that even if I didn't go to Korea I would've regretted it. So it's funny it's like either way I would've ended up in regret.

I also noticed my mind will do this before making a decision to, it will feel confused and want to solve that confusion to avoid regret... But I ended up realizing there was no perfect decision and it was my mind just being obsessive.

So this is like the same thing almost.
 
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