Spider’s Progress Log 🕷 DAY 366: Continuation Log Link ⛓️

[Spider Jerusalem]

Glad you're ok.

KillYourInnerLoser

Thank you Andy

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Scary shit. Glad you're safe

Adam

Thanks man it Fucking scared the shit outta me

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Insane. Glad you're okay. Stay safe bro

Holden

Thanks man - I think I’m gonna be taking the damn bus for a while!

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 104: 23/01/2022

FUCK. ME.

I saw him coming and I had a split second to react and swerve the car left into the ONCOMING TRAFFIC who were doing 30 MPH and were thankfully able to stop their cars. I managed to avoid having a head on collision with this CUNT.

Spider 🕷

Wow. Glad you're still here to post this.

That was pretty quick thinking, 30MPH head on which would probably be more like 15-20 as both of you slam your breaks is survivable over getting hit by that dipshit.

1v1mekid

Dude it was Fucking insane. I think the adrenaline just took over and I punched it and managed to get outta the way. We were like a nut hair away from getting wiped out

20 miles an hour up the ass sounded a hell of a lot better than 100 in the face

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

You've made good inroads by sharing with the forum but you need to do more. This post is for you in case you needed to hear it but is aimed more at guys who won't have had anything like this happen to them.

I'm sure you know from your training the effects of compounding trauma. You need to discuss this with friends/family/someone you trust at length including your feelings around it and just how bad it was. Spare no details. A problem shared is a problem halved.

Make your brother do this but he will need to do it more. It might be hard to encourage him to but its a necessity. The things you've seen will have hardened you to it somewhat. He won't have that luxury.

Refusing to take it on will likely result in PTSD ranging in severity, and any future traumatic events registering with 10x severity. One experience like this can fuck someone for life.

Colossus

Thanks for this man - I think I’m gonna go back to therapy and I’ll definitely discuss this.

I worry that something like this will tip me over the Fucking edge. Been carrying’ a lotta weight around over the years and I think I’m close to breaking point.

Thanks for helping me realise I need to get on this ASAP

Appreciate the support massively

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Glad you're okay. I've had a few close calls flying for the military; do whatever you need to do in order to calm down. My personal thing was the steam room/sauna. I suggest avoiding substances. Really makes you grateful for life.

Vice

Thanks man - had a few myself when I was a cop. Definitely be taking yours and Colossus advice on this one

My coffee was the best tasting coffee I’ve ever had this morning so I’m definitely appreciative ️

Thanks for the support

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Glad to hear you made it out unharmed, take some time to process what happened as that kind of thing will be with you for life.

Brother_Tucker

Thank you my man - appreciate the continued support

I’ve been reflecting on this today and trying to comprehend it. Fucking lucky to be alive

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 105: 24/01/2022

Reflections on My Near-Death Experience and Yesterday's News Today 🗞

Want to start off this post by saying a massive thank you to everyone who posted on my log with messages of support after I almost got killed last night in a near-miss with some dipshit getting chased by the Cops who was doing 100 MPH

last night was Fucking Insane. I've had some pretty close calls in my time, people pulling knives on me, getting shot at on the job etc. but last night was probably one of the closest I gotta say

Things could have gone a lot worse.

I'm really grateful to be alive.


It's made me realise even more that I need to make the most of my time whilst I'm here

I want the elite sex life. I want the top-tier girls. My own place. The crazy experiences. The power and control over my own life

Thought about this a lot during my morning Coffee and Contemplation ️

I genuinely believe that what happened yesterday will change my life

I didn't post my update yesterday because of Dipshit, so here's yesterday's news today

Yesterday's Update:

- Woke up at 04:10 Hrs

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station ️

- Did 16 Push ups and Sit ups in addition to my back exercises

Podcast Rundown:

- Listened to Episode 161 of Andy's Podcast - Day 161: Getting Over Your Anger Phase, Religion Serves a Purpose, and Why Men & Women are Great

I've had my anger phase with women which you can see from my earlier log posts. This is something I've actively researched in the past as I have seen it be referred to as 'Red Pill Rage'. I now realise yeah some women are not good people, but I now believe most are. It's just knowing when to look out for the red flags and to cut things off pre-emptively when yous see them. I was raised Catholic, but turned away from the religion due to the priest sex abuse scandals, the coverups and the corruption within the Church. I do see that religion does have it's merits and some religious folk I've met have been decent people, but it's just not something I personally can forgive as it doesn't sit right with me. Oh yeah, and men and women can be great, but a lot of the time I feel they have to choose to be and work towards it. World would be a better place if this was the case more often.

- Listened to Episode 162 of Andy's Podcast - Day 162: Always be Working on Something if You Don’t want to Become Depressed

I've been there and this is literally the only course of action that has ever worked and gotten me out of the dark hole of depression. Posting on this log has really helped which is a form of working on something (My 365-Day Project). I'll be keeping this episode in mind for the future.

- Listened to Episode 163 of Andy's Podcast - Day 163: Do an Annual Reflection & Give Yourself Some Damn Credit!

Did this recently on my log for the New Year and when I listed what I'd done, I actually did quite a lot in 2021. Always thought 2021 was a crap year because of COVID where I hardly did anything, but writing out my achievements proved this wasn't the case. A good exercise I'll definitely be doing in 2023.

- Listened to Episode 164 of Andy's Podcast - Day 164: Lying is Easier in the Moment, but Harder in the Longterm

I'm always honest with girls now as it just causes shit in the long-term. I'm upfront about what I want and honest about how I feel. Why would you want the hassle otherwise?

- Cleaned my room (last minute decision)

That’s it for Today’s update

Photos posted for accountability purposes

Thanks for reading

Spider 🕷

 

[Colossus]

One day your bucket just fills up. I imagine a career in policing would have done that to you at a much faster rate than others. Especially with knives, gun fights, and the intent of another person to kill you. It wears heavy.

What is good is that you have recognised that your bucket IS full. Take drastic action my friend.

 

[SamJ_]

Wow, that's really rough. Really glad you're okay! I would say use it as motivation. I almost died twice in 2020 and didn't even think much of it, but in retrospect now that I think about it, it may have been one of the contributing factors that led to me joining these forums and deciding to improve myself shortly after.

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

One day your bucket just fills up. I imagine a career in policing would have done that to you at a much faster rate than others. Especially with knives, gun fights, and the intent of another person to kill you. It wears heavy.

What is good is that you have recognised that your bucket IS full. Take drastic action my friend.

Colossus

Thank you brother. It's nice to see the guys on here understand, particularly with all the hate for cops that has been going around in recent years.

I work on a University site where they have regular 'F the Police' protests and parts of my family have never been pro-police. On top of that, I cut ties with a bunch of idiot 'friends' I worked with when I joined up.

This forum is the only place that I've felt welcomed in many years.

Thank you for the book recommendation too - I'm gonna check it out and see if I can get shipping to my country

Many thanks

Spider

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Wow, that's really rough. Really glad you're okay! I would say use it as motivation. I almost died twice in 2020 and didn't even think much of it, but in retrospect now that I think about it, it may have been one of the contributing factors that led to me joining these forums and deciding to improve myself shortly after.

SamJ_

Thank you mate. I hope you're doing better now and your experiences don't get you too down - once is bad enough, but to go through it twice must've been hard and taken it's toll on you. Come close myself a couple of times

I think it's very important to as much as possible try and see the positives out of the negative situations. I'm glad that you used your experiences to propel yourself forward - in the past, I've just sank into depression and wasted a couple of years and that's a real danger when shit like this happens

My brother is convinced I saved his life by my quick actions, so our relationship will probably strengthen as a result. There's also the fact I feel motivated and like I've been given a second roll of the dice. There is a couple of things I've been really putting off and need to get on and I feel like I need to take advantage of the opportunity I've now been given

Thank you for the support - much appreciated

Spider

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 106: 25/01/2022

Instagram as social proof Working Towards Lay 4 Post Tinder Burnout

I struggled to come up with a title for today's post. Been a crazy few days and then got hit with the uneventfulness today

Strange lull in my week

I then remembered I've been more active on Instagram lately and the reason for this is to give me a bit of social proof for when I get back on the dating. Never been big on Social Media, but I guess if it helps me with the dating then it's a worthwhile endeavour to pay passing attention to it. I'll be keeping it non-cringe with the posts and not putting pointless, cringey as Fuck bullshit on there like most idiots do

I've got my account set to 'private' too as I'm not big on showing off my life to the public. I'll show it to girls I want to Fuck though so they can see more of me and what I'm about!

I'll try and keep my posts interesting, lightly comical and 'different'

I'll see how it goes, but I could do with getting laid after a stressful week or 2. Might be a good sub-goal for February

Today's Update:

- Woke up at 04:10 Hrs

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station ️

- Did 17 Push ups and Sit ups - Keeping up the streak. I'm hopeful I can get to 20, although it's getting tougher. Persistence!

- Bought myself another birthday present. This was something for my Backpack Project I work on every now and again. I think I'll post a photo of this once the new patch comes. I think it looks pretty cool and that you guys will like it!

- Worked 08:00 Hrs - 16:00 Hrs
Same shit different day! 🖥

Podcasts:

Listened to Episode 165 of Andy's Podcast - Day 165: Elite Guys who are Dissatisfied with Their Sex Lives? (Patreon Question)

I've had periods of this where I've had a few really hot girls in a row then it's been slim pickings for a while. I've realised now that it is literally just a numbers game.

Listened to Episode 166 of Andy's Podcast - Day 166: Is it a Double-Standard to Sleep with Other Girls, While Wanting a Monogamous Girlfriend?

Perfect example of why you shouldn't listen to 'Normie' opinions. I stopped many years ago. I pick what works for me now and stick to it. I've been called 'selfish' and a 'Fuck-boy' for not wanting a relationship. Anybody has a problem with that then I couldn't give a Fuck. I mind my own business now and do what works for me.

Listened to Episode 167 of Andy's Podcast - Day 167: Equality is Bullshit (A Relationship Should Never Be Equal)

I'm glad somebody finally said it. Fuck the feminists and people who think that equality is even a distinct possibility. Interesting and ground-breaking view that it's cruel and forces people into doing what they don't want to do. Women genuinely want to be submissive from my experience. They want a man to take charge and be decisive. Working for equality is this unreachable 'totemic' standard and is what has arguably destroyed Western society and lead to the false ideas that men can be women, women can walk around dangerous neighbourhoods late at night and that you should prioritise a career over being a mother which has lead to depression rates across the West skyrocketing. It also lead to the rise of the Simp and an epidemic of Soyboy weak men. Feminists often say they want a 'sensitive, caring man' then swoon over testosterone saturated hunks on Game of Thrones and Spartacus. Fuck the Equality SJW crowd. I'm going my own way now.

Listened to Episode 168 of Andy's Podcast - Day 168: How to Give Her Rollercoaster Sex

Sex shouldn't be mechanical - the least enjoyable sex I've had is where I've felt we were just going through the motions. I'm definitely gonna keep this in mind for Lay number 4. Got myself a wand now too, so I'll be trying this out soon. I'll get back on the dating at some point. Just had a shitty couple of weeks.

That's it for today's update

Bit uneventful today I'm afraid, but I'm grateful for that after what's happened

Photos have been posted for accountability purposes

Thanks for Reading

Spider 🕷

 

[colgate / bulldog]

Sex shouldn't be mechanical - the least enjoyable sex I've had is where I've felt we were just going through the motions. I'm definitely gonna keep this in mind for Lay number 4. Got myself a wand now too, so I'll be trying this out soon. I'll get back on the dating at some point. Just had a shitty couple of weeks.

I'm curious as to what your sexual experience was before you joined the forums. Is your lay counter lifetime or just since you've joined?

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Sex shouldn't be mechanical - the least enjoyable sex I've had is where I've felt we were just going through the motions. I'm definitely gonna keep this in mind for Lay number 4. Got myself a wand now too, so I'll be trying this out soon. I'll get back on the dating at some point. Just had a shitty couple of weeks.

I'm curious as to what your sexual experience was before you joined the forums. Is your lay counter lifetime or just since you've joined?

colgate

Hey man, thanks for the question

Since I've joined the forums It's 3.

Lifetime? It's somewhere between 20 and 25 lays and that includes one threesome.

I wanted a clean slate with starting my self-improvement which is why I just reset my counter.

Plus, I didn't want to say 'I've Fucked X number of women' without being able to provide some detailed evidence like the pickup artist community often does - especially when they're trying to sell you some cringey bullshit approach course!

I always said to myself though when I joined the forums as I'm an honest guy, that if anyone asks me the question, then I'll just tell them the answer straight like you have just.

It's why I liked Andy's stuff so much and I took his content seriously: He actually puts his proof out there, so you know he's not bullshitting you

If you have any more questions feel free to ask away? I'm an open book

Kind Regards,

Spider

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 107: 26/01/2022

Pushing through tiredness to achieve my 365 Day Project

Didn't wanna write this post.

I Leave the house every morning at 05:50 and I get in the door at 17:50. 12 Hour Days and most of that time I'm sat staring at a computer screen

Last thing I want to do is stare at one again and I've currently got an annoying ass headache

Managed to work through it though and write up this post. Lot to be said about not giving up even when you can't be arsed

Today’s Update:

- Woke up at 04:20 Hrs

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station ️

- Did 18 Push Ups and Sit Ups in addition to my back exercises - keeping up the streak. Not long until we get to 20

- Worked 08:00 - 16:00 Hrs

Shitty day, lots to do, no lunch break. Fuck this job. Roll on September

- Used 2 Tinder boosts - first one was a fail. Ended up matching with some crazy bitch who I realised a few messages in that I'd matched with previously and unmatched because she was a crazy bitch. Was nice then nasty and kept flitting between the 2. Definitely bi-polar. Binned her off straight away. Second one I got okay results, but I feel this was a waste. Need to boost on the weekends I think ️

Podcast

- Listened to Episode 169 of Andy's Podcast - Day 169: Cute Little Fuckers! (Guest Interview with Step)

This was an interesting episode. As someone who has curvature of the spine it was interesting to hear from someone who didn't let their physical limitations affect them getting after it. Makes me ask myself: 'What's your excuse?'

That's it for today's update

Gonna get some sleep very soon. Hopefully this headache will ease

Photos posted for accountability purposes

Thanks for Reading

Spider 🕷

 

[TacoLover]

Need to boost on the weekends I think

Boosts are really random IMO. I used all my boosts 3 weeks ago, and still got a boosted match last Friday.

It has mostly yielded low quality girls on the "see who likes you" part. Tinder says it works better while swiping, but don't take my word for it.

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Need to boost on the weekends I think

Boosts are really random IMO. I used all my boosts 3 weeks ago, and still got a boosted match last Friday.

It has mostly yielded low quality girls on the "see who likes you" part. Tinder says it works better while swiping, but don't take my word for it.

Yeah it's pretty hit and miss.

I do hate the fact that Tinder is so biased and shitty towards men, especially considering we are almost always the paying customers and on top of that it's not cheap - all those boosts and Gold subscriptions add up.

It's pay to win, but it is what it is.

I'll stick with it

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 108: 27/01/2022

Doctor's check up and subsequent relief - all clear physically

Kept this quiet as I didn't wanna say anything until today, but I went to the Doctor's and saw a nurse for a check up.

Blood pressure excellent. Oxygen level 99%. Weight good. Heart rate a little high, but that was due to being at the actual doctor's office.

She basically said that if I had any heart and lung problems or disease, the readings she took wouldn't be this good, particularly the Oxygen reading which was 99%.

She wanted me to have a chat with the doctor about my anxiety, so I did. Won't discuss on here what was talked about as that's for me, but I've been diagnosed with Anxiety, PTSD and Depression and put on some antidepressants. Discussed family history - cancer, heart disease etc. because of my family and it seems to be down to lifestyle choices so hasn't recommended any specific tests etc. in relation to this.

Also been advised to go for therapy. She said I could have a blood test to do a health screen if I really wanted to, but it's unlikely it'll show anything specific as I haven't got any actual symptoms of anything.

She said they'd want the blood test before therapy to rule out the fact it's not down to a thyroid issue which I guessed is the main reason they'd want to have it done, as the therapy department is pretty crowded and under resourced due to COVID mental health etc. and there's a long ass waiting list.

At this stage just having the all clear from the nurse is all I wanted. I feel very relieved to hear this. I can put this behind me now and start to move on with the self-improvement.

I'm going to McDonald's now as a reward for getting through this as I hate going to the doctor's. Kinda ironic, I know, but I haven't had one for a while and I think I need to reward myself for getting through this.

Thanks for Reading

Spider 🕷

 

[Colossus]

All the mental stuff can be overcome. Especially with conscious living and focus on your own life. What gets measured gets managed.

Rewards are also important. You have this stuff worked out. Keep on the grind and be smart about medication - that is, avoid it unless you know it is for you.