Hydro's Log

07/31
Trained on Monday. i hit 165 for 3 x 5 on Squats and 215 1 x 5 on Deadlifts. As I was walking from the cooldown, I stopped by a shop and had a conversation with a nice and lovely lady, Eva, who runs a music and artsy store. Had a nice 30ish min conversation with her and I'm starting to slowly get out of my comfort zone by conversing, with women which is awesome. Immersion is 100% needed aka exposure therapy. I finished up my meal prep and took a picture of it to prepare for the week. I did go to Safeways though which is nice, for some popcorn and a 0 calorie beverage.

Here's to more! Oh and I did close out 20 tabs like I needed to. I have a problem with having too many fucking tabs opened on my computer so I'm slowly reading/watching and then x'ing them off. So shout out to me for that! Slowly but surely!
 
08/01

Woke up sluggish and felt tired, dicked around on the internet once again. I have been masturbating too many times so I'm going to make sure that before I go to bed, I put the phone in the container so it's gone and I can't access it for a good 9ish hours.

Went to the gym and did overhead press, finished 100 lbs for 5 x 5. Only needed to do 3 sets but fuck it I did 5. After that I did some bodybuilding work by doing arnold presses and supersetted that with lateral raises, one arm at a time. Went for my cooldown walk and I told a girl that she had nice hair since the hair color stood out as cotton candy pink. She didn't hear me as I believe she had earbuds in, but I didn't feel bad, ashamed or embarrassed so that's a W.

Went to safeway again today, gave a homeless guy a $3 meal, it was large bag of popcorn with a 0 calorie beverage. The dude had a really bad black eye on his left eye, but it wasn't purple it was red. Hope the dude is safe man, hopefully that bag of popcorn and drink satiated you until tomorrow. The foodbank is opened 11am-4pm so homeless people just gotta intermittent fast as a necessity if they can't get food outside of those hours.

Researched some bodybuilding stuff, going to add a 3 sets of forearms and 6 sets of biceps + triceps of training per week through my schedule. I'm doing Starting Strength but god damn do they not give a fuck bout arms. People complain about that so just doing some research (and taking action) to prevent future problems.

Closed 20 tabs today as well, that's 40 tabs total! Hoping for another 20 for tomorrow.

Goodnight guys, tackle the day!
 
Still awake and it's 4:30 am over here.
What did I accomplish today? Well a lot more negatives than positives.
I jacked off 2-3 times today (lost count).
I ate pizza at night, a full medium pan sized pizza.
And most importantly i think I just fucked up my sleep schedule, fuck.

The highlight for today is that I trained and did 3 sets of 5 for Squats at 175 lbs and 1 set of 5 for trap bar deadlifts at 225 lbs. I then did some ab work and a set of cable forearm flexions.

As of now I'm closing out my tabs and will close out 15 tabs on my computer but right now I'm getting a bit emotional. I'm on the theredarchive website reading Chris's content from GLL. Talking about lonely Saturday nights, Hollywood loves your insecurities, his opportunities with the Israeli girl and more articles that I read. Currently have Vagabond (manga) meditation as background music https://youtu.be/dMKIq7iqpQs, reading some stuff to put acid on my wounds. Why do I have to be like this? Why am I torturing myself like this? Why am I into self improvement? I want this beautiful life, but man, fuck, the gym isn't even difficult at the moment. These inner issues bottling up is what's making me spiritually claustrophobic, I just want to curl up into the fetal position and go to bed.

Sorry guys.
 
Interesting thought, but I wonder if physical masturbation and mental masturbation are related........
 
Hydro said:
Researched some bodybuilding stuff, going to add a 3 sets of forearms and 6 sets of biceps + triceps of training per week through my schedule. I'm doing Starting Strength but god damn do they not give a fuck bout arms.
Click to expand...

SS is real good, but it has some stuff that makes no sense. I followed it verbatim for a long time. When my bench was 320, my arms looked like nothing. I started adding in curls and lying triceps extensions twice a week each, and put 2 inches on my arm in 3 months...while dieting.
 
08/04 - 08/07

So I went to the gym and trained, did all of my sets. 175 and 185 for 3 sets of 5, Deadlifts, 225 and 235 for 1 set of 5, and Bench press (Thurs) 145 for 3 sets of 5 and Overhead press 105 for 3 sets of 5 (Sat).

Couple interesting things have happened over this weekend, I'm involved in a discord called the Inner Circle by a fellow pick up creator, Avery Hayden. I really recommend ya'll to check him out, especially if you're more on the analytical, analysis paralysis type of person.

The weeks challenge was to get 20 points, and you could get points in a myriad of ways, but since I'm still scared to cold approach, I just approached women in a platonic way 20 times, each for 1 point that gets me to the total of 20 points. If you get to x points, you won't be in a draft to be put in the #jail section of the discord, so happy about that.

I had a week to do this challenge and had 10 approaches left to do on the last day, and I literally procrastinated on the last day. I got the approaches done, and even a woman at the grocery store approached me, but it was for help since she wanted to know where the eggs were at lol.

I was walking past a guy and he had a wrestling shirt (not a uni that we go to), dedicated to a college and I asked him if he was on the wrestling team. I've been thinking about doing some martial arts like wrestling or BJJ, just like I have been thinking about making a website but have been PROCRASTINATING (years about the website) at this point. I really want to get more physically active and lifting is more asocial than a community thing like wrestling or BJJ so I'm thinking about doing that. This was interesting since I didn't even want to go to the grocery store, is this fate? Is the universe giving me momentum to get me to join wrestling as I've been thinking about it for some time now?

So this happened on Thursday 08/03 at night time.

On Sunday, 08/06, I got a call spontaneously by my dad at like 10 PM. He called me since my cousins had come over to the house, my first cousins on my dad side, there were about 4 who came over. I haven't seem them in some time, over the years, and this is when I realized that I've been really, really, really isolating myself to basically everyone.

I didn't know who was talking on the phone as I haven't talked to them for years, and these are my first cousins. I guessed it correctly, but I was actually unsure which is fucking crazy. They were telling me about some stuff about college and I haven't graduated yet, as I'm basically a huge fuck up, in life not just in one particular thing.

I started getting teary eyed and got emotional since there were some emotions that I was feeling, that I can't parse.
1. Emotions of inadequacy
2. Emotions of isolation by family
3. Emotions of not really wanting to be with anybody
4. Emotions of, omg, i have really fucked up my own life, and it is my responsibility/fault

I had to leave the apartment, and went out for like a 1-1.5 hour walk since I just needed to get out. This is where I start understanding more of myself. I was listening to music/podcasts on the walk for me to essentially numb the emotions and keep away those bad feelings. Instead of feeling those emotions that I have kept under the surface, I was distracting my self with podcasts (like andy's) and music.

I then went to go get some pizza, when you're fat like I am, food is a stress reliever that I use. Some people use food, some use alcohol, some use drugs, some use instagram. So this is something that I did to downplay those emotions.

I am happy that I've been going to the gym, but I really need to start going multiple times a day. I don't want to feel these emotions, so I gotta work on this shit, or I might do something to myself that I may regret.

What do I need to do?
Continue gym, going multiple times a day (6 days a week)
Start wrestling/BJJ (potentially just wrestling)
Continue the studying course and prepare for upcoming classes (have been slacking 100%)
Continue being out in the front lines and continue cold approaching.

I have to make it man, I can't let other guys like me down who are in my position or worse. For you, For them.
 
Zug said:
Hydro said:
Researched some bodybuilding stuff, going to add a 3 sets of forearms and 6 sets of biceps + triceps of training per week through my schedule. I'm doing Starting Strength but god damn do they not give a fuck bout arms.
Click to expand...

SS is real good, but it has some stuff that makes no sense. I followed it verbatim for a long time. When my bench was 320, my arms looked like nothing. I started adding in curls and lying triceps extensions twice a week each, and put 2 inches on my arm in 3 months...while dieting.
Click to expand...

2 inches on your arms in 3 months on a caloric deficit? You must be joking my friend, I can't even fathom something like that.
 
08/08

Did my workout, bench press 150 for 3 sets of 5. Again before I went all I did was dick around on the internet, opened up some more tabs on my computer and I really need to handle that. I can't believe it, having an excessive amount of tabs is just fucking stupid lol, and I need to work on that (probably have some ADHD-like SYMPTOMS).

I fucked up my sleep schedule as well, so need to work on that, but something interesting happened last night.

I went out to go get some pizza, and right across the street from dominos, there was a firetruck and I believe an ambulance there. I believe someone was OD'ing on something (couldn't tell and paramedics were already there minutes before I came). One of the medics was the same medic who I met when I was doing some CPR who was OD'ing on fentanyl ~20 minutes north where I live.

I might be looking too much into this, but it felt like some form of de ja vu. The same medic who was telling me thanks by giving someone CPR, looked a bit worried in last nights situation. With the look on his face, I'm not sure if the person who needed help is alive today.

I might be reading too much into this, but is this a sign for me? Am I going to die soon? Am I going to die with no one to be around and help me? Who knows.
 
08/09
Woke up at around 2, didn't get out of bed until like 3:30 pm of course. Yeah sleep schedule is def fucked up, as I'm going to bed at 8 am... typing this atm, wtf

Did my workout of squats 205 lbs for 3 sets of 5 and Trap bar deadlifts of 255 for 1 set of 5. Did my 1 set of wrist flexion for forearms. Bruhhhh I cannot tell you how much I was sweating from the lower body lifts, wtf... I never sweat that much from cardio, why so much through resistance training.

I marinated my chicken that i was supposed to on sunday, today. I'm going to cook it today (thursday). I think I'm going to make a system for my meal prep stuff. I buy my chicken breast on Fridays after the gym or something, I wash it, cut it up, and then marinate it. After I marinate it, I can get my subway which I always get on friday since the daily special is tuna and only costs $5 with tax. That way I reward myself with a nice sub sandwich that i like, with the effort of having my chicken prepared before I grill it.

Ive been thinking about it, but haven't been implementing it like I should.

How will I keep myself accountable to the best case? I will use the forfeit app like I did preparing this chicken and that if I don't prepare chicken breast by 11:59pm on friday, then I lose $5, and that $5 would be the $5 I could've bought the sandwich with.

Toodle loooo
 
08/10

Woke up at around 2pm ish, but before I woke up at around 10am ish.
Did my workout of overhead press for 110 lbs for 3 sets of 5.
After that, did tricep extensions and tricep pushdowns on the cable's @ 70 lbs for 2 sets of 12. After I did my curls of 30 lbs for 2 sets of 12.

I finished my meal prepping before the gym, but it is of course long overdue.
View attachment 1

I got some subway to eat after I ate my two containers of chicken, rice and beans. I was walking around at midnight and wanted to go to the gym to get a pump lol.
Here is a pic of me, outside the gym. idk why the lights were on since they're supposed to be off but i guess staff forgot.


idk why but I had a dream where my mom and dad had a peck, like a kiss. WTF? I'm Indian bruh, they had an arranged marriage and they've never kissed, ever growing up. Why did I have an awkward dream of my parents giving each other a peck. AND I WAS IN THE CORNER WTF. Had to wake up from that shit lmaoooooo :evil:
 
Hydro
I like what I see here man. Good job on the meal prep and working out. Keep it up; we're rooting for you
 
komeback_kile said:
@Hydro
I like what I see here man. Good job on the meal prep and working out. Keep it up; we're rooting for you
Click to expand...

Thank you man, I really appreciate it!
 
08/11

Yep, sleep schedule is f'ed up, but going to go to bed 'early' since I'm writing this up @ 3 am...

I did my squats and deadlifts, squats 215 lbs for 3 sets of 5, and deadlifts 265 lbs for 1 set of 5.

Can't wait for the next lower body workout since I'll be putting on 2 wheels for squats and 2 plates and a quarter for trap bar deadlifts!

Need to x out more tabs, though, the tabs and being an "information collector" is whats stopping me from taking more action. I think I need more knowledge, but the best type of knowledge that I can develop now is from ACTION, not THEORY.

Andy even talked about it on this specific article: https://killyourinnerloser.com/pickup-artists-are-theatrical-wizards/

Great workout today, walked a decent amount too, 15,000 steps. I left a comment on a video that Radical posted on a recent video about Social Freedom. I need to practice my social muscle, just like I practice my physical muscle.
Here's the video:
https://youtu.be/jz6bf2Oka5k
Here's the comment on the video:
One main thing that I learned from Atomic Habits is that if you want to consistently do something (since reps / frequency is a better indicator of habit formation than time) tell yourself that you're going to go out at THIS time, on THESE days, for THIS amount of time. Just like how Andy said that you need to stay out on the front lines, I found it to be better to schedule it like a workout.

In fact that's what James Clear talks about in his book, Atomic Habits. The group that did nothing AND the group that watched a motivational video had a workout 30-33% of the time, the group that committed to a SPECIFIC TIME AND PLACE, the numbers skyrocketed to over 90%.

I plan on doing this with cold approach, but I can 1000% vouch for this for going to the gym. I've been one of the most consistent members at the gym (there's a top 3 most visited members list at our gym) for 2 months now and having a time and place of when you're going, and some type of plan helps.
The plan for the gym is to hit for example is 225 lbs of squats for 3 sets of 5 and 265 lbs of deadlifts for 1 set of 5 today. I'll be going at around 8:10-8:15pm and the gym is right around the corner where I live.

Same thing applies to building social freedom, i.e. I will go out for 30 minutes on every weekday M-F at 6pm and have 1 conversation this session. From there, just like the gym, progressive overload and build up your "social muscle".
If you are going solo-dolo, I recommend having some type of accountability so that there is a consequence of you not going out, and from there you can use stickk, the app forfeit, or if you have friends they can keep you accountable with your own money, your PC, your phone, your game console, etc...

Great video!

Extra: I'm losing weight right now, so I might just start walking out and get more steps in, and having convos with strangers, workers and eventually women. That way I'm getting 5k steps a day, and I'm building social freedom, seems neat.
 
08/12

I woke up at around 5:45 am, Even though I went to sleep earlier (4am ish), I woke up cause I had to use the bathroom really bad.
Pro tip: Don't eat 3 packs of ramen, with the seasoning if it expired over a month ago. I think it is out of my system by now, but I really had to use the washroom about a handful of times man. I learned my lesson (even though I ate it twice this week). Good thing is I only have 2 packs left but I'm just going to throw them out since I don't want any problems like that.

I went to sleep back at around 10am ish, and set up two alarms between 3:30 and 3:45 pm since I need to go to the gym and do my bench press. I really didn't want to go since I had pretty bad sleep tonight, but hey the second time when I woke up I didn't have any stomach problems so I think that's gone 99%, for now.

Hit bench press, 155 lbs for 3 sets of 5. Hit it pretty neat and getting into the groove of the bench technique. Last time when I benched 150 lbs for 3 sets of 5, it 'felt heavier' and the reps 'felt sloppier'.

The cue that I believe I need to do more is that I need to keep my chest more up, by really pressing my upper back into the bench while retracting the scapula as well. The reps felt very smooth, on my last rep of my last set, I paused it for 2-3 seconds and that shit flew up as if it was my first rep (but it felt slow).

After that I did my accessory work by doing 70lbs tricep extensions and pushdowns for 2 sets of 12 and did 30lb bicep curl for 2 sets of 12 as well. When I first introduced arm work into Starting Strength (a week or two ago), I got it from this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HXoY7xzHlWU

Starting next week, I am going to up the weight for the tricep and bicep work, the weights feel good but I know I can do more weight so going to up to 80 lbs for tricep stuff and 35lbs for bicep work.

I'm happy that I had a great workout, even with a recent upset stomach and terrible sleep. Proud of myself for going even though I didn't want to, and could have skipped but I didn't. Why didn't I skip? I don't think it's because of discipline and willpower. It's because I have been so consistent with going to the gym, that it's basically become a habit. I don't need willpower to go, I just go, it's second nature to me as of now (but I understand that this may not be 100% in the future).

This is one of the reasons why I split up Starting Strength into 6 upper lower days instead of 3 full body days, so I can go to the gym more often. Remember, Atomic habits, Repetition (no pun intended) is more important than time to make something a habit.

However after the gym, I started feeling some negative emotions. It could be, because it's a Saturday, and I'm currently typing this at 7:30pm and here I am, all by myself, in my basement, with "nothing" to do. The reason why I put "nothing" is because of course there are things I should do, go outside, approach, but I just feel scared. Just like in atomic habits, I need to set SPECIFIC times, at SPECIFIC days, to go out and approach SPECIFIC amount of people at a SPECIFIC challengeable level.

As I'm currently typing this, I'm listening to Chris's: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChXTJlDU_Hg video and will probably watch his reaction video to his own, magnum opus, Reacting to Lonely Saturday Nights: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qvYEjEqmSI

However my mood being down because it's a Saturday is mostly because since the gym closes at 5pm on Saturday (closed on Sun), I of course do my cooldown walk after the last session of the gym, I saw a BUNCH of attractive women. I just wanted to approach them, talk to them, have convo's but I couldn't. Having that sense of power, increasing via the gym is such a beautiful feeling since I believe I'm becoming more powerful (via leveling up) in the gym, but feel quite emasculated knowing that I can't approach a single woman, still. Remember, I'm not trying as hard as I could be, but I know what I need to do. I need to trust my instincts, and I know my instincts and my intellectual mind do two different things. My intellectual mind says to go read my THEORY, (which is why I have so many tabs) my primal, instinctual mind says that I know what I need to do and that I'm just procrastinating on the approach stuff since what I need to do, is the approach.

I will cut out my tabs on my computer, stop being an information collector, Flozo.
 
08/13

Woke up earlier today around the early afternoon since my mom was coming to visit me. It was nice to see her after a couple of weeks :)
We caught up on conversations and since my mom hasn't been to the safeway that recently opened at my place, we went there and I gave her a tour of the entire store. She bought me some pastries which is nice, thanks mom. We ate, and she wrapped up some burritos from my meal prep of chicken rice and beans.
After that we had more convo, and then she left.

Sundays are fine and dandy, but I don't really have a purpose since the gym is closed and i keep on procrastinating. My goal is to close 100 tabs, starting on the 14th (I'm typing this early morning) and end by the end of the week. CLOSE THEM TABS!

Also, I do want to note taht I finished watching again, Chris's, Lonley Saturday nights REVISITED today. Remember, how I said that I believed that 99% of the expired ramen exited out of my system, yeah, no. Bruh I went to take a shit literally 5 times in under 2 hours, might even have bad bowel movements for tomorrow which I'm nervous about since I'm scheduled to squat 225 lbs for 3 sets of 5 and deadlift 275 lbs for 1 set of 5.

Interestingly, I was researching on some bodybuilding/lifting stuff and as I was researching, I found this to be funny: https://youtu.be/EcLfndWlYB0?t=711
Dr. Mike Israetel (the guy talking) said some shit like if you care about the tibialis anterior, you're either joking or you're 'deeply incel." Lol, bruh I never asked but since I have sprained both of my ankles I have wondered how I can strengthen my shin muscle. Fuck you Dr. Mike lol, but thanks for putting out great content for guys like me who want to learn more about lifting, bodybuilding and even strength training. I plan on getting on his app, RP Hypertrophy and might even join his private forum since I care about having a more aesthetic physique but that will happen in the future.
 
It’s good that you’re this passionate about lifting weights, i’ve found in my own journey that loving the stuff that gets us to where we want to be really helps. Keep up the good work in the gym man
 
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