Manga 🇰🇷: October Update

[Neo_Primal]

I feel you on starting to realize what girls you like. When you have even just a bit of abundance, you can start to pick and choose, which is an amazing feeling.

I also feel you on how much work there is to be done, and to avoid coasting. I struggle with that when I get a consistent fuckbuddy. I start to slack in almost every other aspect of my life. I believe Discipline and sticking to the slight-edge is key.

 

[Squilliam]

Quick tip, score some fenugreek and take 5 pills before you're going to meet a chick. It helps with the refractory period (among other things.)

What dosage do you take? I just ordered some, but I feel like "just take 5 pills" seems very arbitrary.

 

[Manganiello]

I feel you on starting to realize what girls you like. When you have even just a bit of abundance, you can start to pick and choose, which is an amazing feeling.

I also feel you on how much work there is to be done, and to avoid coasting. I struggle with that when I get a consistent fuckbuddy. I start to slack in almost every other aspect of my life. I believe Discipline and sticking to the slight-edge is key.

Appreciate that man. Thats exactly how I feel.

Life is soo good rn.

But I also want to fulfill my sex goals and I feel very tempted to settle sometimes.


I don't think I would forgive myself for stopping.


Im kind of wondering like what point would be enough?

I think I gotta get to a point where all my lifetime sex/dating goals are satisfied before I can move on in life. Cuz honestly my career is not where I want it to be, nor is my finances.


I want to keep going and max out myself with sex.
+
I want to focus on other areas of life.


But I know myself well enough to know I can't do both all that well. So it's like that inability to do both that's causing some pain.


If any senior guys on here have input. I wouldn't mind it.

 

[Manganiello]

April 5

Just broke up with the blonde girl.

I ended it and just spent the last hour having a conversation that really fucking sucks.



---

So we went for a drive and got to a parking lot.

And I really had a hard time bringing it up but I just finally said "I have to say something and this isn't easy."

And she said "I'm scared what is it"

I just said I wasn't really feeling the same way the last 3 weeks as I did when we started.

And just told her she did nothing wrong, and I was trying to keep it going with her but I felt like it was never gonna be a good match between us, and I couldn't pretend that I felt the same way she did. And that if I waited to tell her it would only feel worse.


She basically sat their the whole time staying quiet and crying.


I did not feel good about doing it, but I also felt like this was inevitable and me not saying anything and letting her get more invested was not helping.


She really didn't do anything wrong.
I just wasnt feeling it with her.
And it's like as much as I wasn't feeling it.
I actually really didn't want to hurt her.


I just didn't have the time to see her and another girl and continue to work on my bigger goals.

And as much as it sucks, she was the person that needed to go. And it feels pretty bad that it happened to be someone I actually thought was a really innocent caring person.


This article has been useful:
https://killyourinnerloser.com/how-to-breakup/


I'm gonna try and fall asleep.

 

[Jacobpalmer123]

Better to go through the pain now rather than later. It's harder but overall it gets easier. You're doing her a favor. It's tough for me to do that and something I need to work on.

 

[Manganiello]

Better to go through the pain now rather than later. It's harder but overall it gets easier. You're doing her a favor. It's tough for me to do that and something I need to work on.

Ya.
I felt like if I didn't pull the trigger now it would be 100x worse.

 

[Crisis_Overcomer]

If any senior guys on here have input. I wouldn't mind it.

Well KillYourInnerLoser is pretty old, so he can offer some advice.

I've felt satisfied with my sex life 3-4 times, to the point I stopped chasing girls and focused on other areas of my life. However now, even though I had 2 plates and could take a break, I kept going.

Why?

I think I fell in love with perfecting my process. In the past I'd get girls without CA and it felt a bit easy. With CA though, I realize I'm lacking skills and this pisses me off. So even though I still want to get laid a lot, I wanna refine my process and get laid via CA. And then get laid with legit hotties.

This is what keeps me going, otherwise I'd be content.

I think you're a bit like me right now, since you want to shift your focus on CA while also doing business and perhaps improving your body. My only advice is to ruthlessly protect your energy levels. Never sacrifice sleep, stick to your diet 99%, avoid alcohol, and ban any kind of drama in your life. When your energy is taken care off, you'll notice that you make better choices that assist you in your your goals.

Finally, you should do some "accurate thinking" regarding what needs to happen to hit your goals (whatever they are) and if you're willing to invest your energy. I'll share a piece that beautifully illustrates this point (surprisingly, I wasn't the one who wrote it)
.
.
.
One of the most important things Dan Kennedy taught me many years ago was the idea of "accurate thinking" in business.

And here's what I mean by that...

Since last summer, I've been toying with the idea of going all-in on Youtube, and making 2-3 videos per week.

Why?

Because I see so much potential to bring new people into the world of copywriting with Youtube.

I see people like Noah Kagan...

Graham Stephan...

And Alex Cattoni crushing on Youtube...

And I feel like if I put in the work, I could have a Youtube channel with 100k+ subscribers.

Which would grow my personal brand...

It would enroll new members in Copy Accelerator...

So there's a lot of positives that would come from it.

However...

I'm also aware that growing a channel to 100k subscribers is not easy.

It's not as simple as grabbing an iPhone, recording a video and uploading it to Youtube.

I know there's more to it.

So instead of diving head first into Youtube without an "accurate" idea of what it will take...

I recently did some consulting calls with Jack Selby (he's the producer for Graham Stephan who has nearly 4 million subscribers on Youtube).

And during our calls, Jack walked me through their whole Youtube playbook.

He showed me how they come up with video ideas...

What their posting schedule is like...

And all the ins-and-outs of how the Youtube algorithm works.

At the start of the call, I was gung-ho and excited about filming more Youtube videos...

But by the end of the call, my eyes were opened to just how much work this would actually be.

It was not a small thing.

And it would be a huge committment on my part.

Jack mentioned that an average video that Graham creates takes around 25 hours when you factor in writing the script, filming the video and editing it.

And right now he's putting out 2-3 videos per week.

So that's a lot of work right there.

And on top of this...

Graham has stuck to his upload schedule of 2-3 videos per week for 5 years straight without missing a day.

Which is insane.

But the Youtube algorithm rewards people who post consistently.

So they stay on schedule no matter what.

Which means they are always filming...

Always researching new video ideas...

And never taking vacations.

It's a 24/7 job.

Now I know there are other ways to do Youtube...

And I wouldn't necessarily have to go to all the extremes that Graham does...

But the reality of growing a Youtube channel to 100k+ subscribers is that it'd be a LOT of work.

It would need to be my main focus.

And knowing that, it's just not something I'm interested in doing.

PLUS, there's a whole bunch of other variables that I would need to consider like...

- how valuable would 100k subscribers really be? Would it make me an extra million bucks a year? Would it be a lot less? Could I acheive the same ROI by running paid ads?

- how many new people would I need to manage in terms of video editors, project managers etc (I like to keep things lean, so this is a big issue for me)

- do I actually like talking into a camera and filming content? (the answer is not really, I prefer writing, so filming 2-3x a week would probably start to feel like a chore very quickly)

- if my channel blows up and I'm getting recognized everywhere I go, and I'm being asked to take pictures with people, is this something I'll enjoy (again, the answer is no. I prefer to be more anonymous)

So there's all kinds of questions to ask...

And this ties back to the lesson that Dan Kennedy taught me about "accurate thinking".

You need to have an accurate (and realistic) view of what is required to do something.

Otherwise you'll end up trying a ton of things...

And wasting a bunch of time...

When you could have just focused on the one or two things that you really enjoy (and that actually move the needle for you).

So there ya go...

Make sure you have "accurate thinking" in everything you do.

Your bank account (and your sanity) will thank you.

That's all I got for ya this morning...

Enjoy your Thursday,

- Justin Goff

 

[Radical]

Good job on that break up man. You feel better quicker like this than doing it any other way

Regards advice, i finally got to a point where i felt id spent too long on girls

I was pushing 3 years on it (though covid affected so more like 1.5 good years worth of time)

My new approach is get my income up for the next few years….. and then i can have another hardcore run at dating in my 30s. The goal then will be to finish my bucketlist stuff and find a couple of girls i can love. Also my hope is i enjoy dating way more with no money stress

I do always feel the urge to get back into the game full time gotta admit that - it takes discipline and the ability to get laid still with low time/energy input to keep me away

A couple of guys we know got into relationships purely so they could smash it in business and not worry about chicks

 

[Holden]

Radical Derek from MPMD is doing this right now, pretty notable.

I've been toying with the same idea because I waste a lot of time and energy on finding girls. If you have a couple on retention it's easier but still a part-time job to do everything right.

Maintaining a harem (not to mention creating one) takes a huge amount of time and energy. Going mono would make go crazy missing the variety.

I think the best way to go about it is to do this girl stuff full-time for just as long as it needs to build a harem. But I'm running into the trouble that I can't just drop my business now to chase skirt - the audience expects content every week or my growth will stifle.

I'm trying to go monk mode again and wake up at 5 AM to work but it's not ideal as most girls want to meet late in the evening.

Oh well.

 

[Radical]

Holden I think it depends what level of money success you want.

But i've been listening to a lot of Alex Becker lately and he's of the opinion if you want to be rich you have to sacrifice most of your dating and social life while you build it up (granted he is now chasing billionaire level success)

Im going to butcher this but the quote i heard from him was 'You sacrifice now so you dont sacrifice what you love later'

 

[Manganiello]

Thanks for the comments guys.

I really value your insights
Holden, Radical ,Crisis_Overcomer

Ill respond to them when I get a chance.

 

[Holden]

Plus all of you (Holden, Mange, etc) are missing something here: If you don't wanna put so much time into your dating life, outsource it. Get one of your girls (or multiple girls) to find girls for you both to sleep with on Tinder/Hinge/Bumble.

Yeah, thanks for the reminder. I forgot about that possibility.

 

[Manganiello]

April 9

More of a journal post to log into my journey and not a post-action report.

All and all, ya I don't feel ready to settle down quite yet.


I like the Korean girl

I really like this Korean chick I'm seeing.
Sexual compatability is extremely high. Same with everything else actually. Like we just click and I think we both like each other a lot.



But my sex goals aren't met yet

The problem is I realllly don't feel like I'm done with girls, so it's almost like I want to just get more emotionally involved with her, but my dick wants to explore more.



Options to deal with this

I've heard every angle about this from
1. Having an open relationship talk
2. Straight up lying
3. Or just indirectly giving the impression you're seeing other girls.
4. Go exclusive and work on fitness goals then fuck around in 6 months.


what happened previously

With the blonde girl I opted not to tell.
Slept with 2 other girls while seeing her.
And didn't feel bad about it tbh.

...Up until it was clear she really liked me, then I felt bad, then had to break up with her to save her from getting really hurt later. I think I broke up with her in the softest way possible.

So it was like I was ok with it while we weren't super invested in each other. And then when she seemed to like me and wanted to show me to her mom and her friends, I thought ok 'fuck let's end this now'.



Every option has consequences

I think this is one of those where I need to sort out where I stand on this.

I can either tell her (Hey I want to maintain honesty with each other at all times, I like you a lot, but Im not ready to be sexually exclusive).

And that sounds like literally lighting dynamite. Cuz there's a high chance that won't work.

Or I lie and sleep around. Which then introduces all the consequences.

Or I basically maintain exclusivity and focus on weight loss, and then leave for Toronto and fuck non-exclusively there.



Ultimately I need to figure out where I stand

Like I said I need to decide for myself where I stand. Because I'm getting legit jealousy seeing Toast and Crisis_Overcomer approach girls. And I don't think that jealousy will go away.


---+---

Project for today is to decide where I stand on this issue and just go for it.

Ive heard good points for every possible path to take here. And they're all valid. But ultimately it's up to me to decide.

I think you're a bit like me right now, since you want to shift your focus on CA while also doing business and perhaps improving your body. My only advice is to ruthlessly protect your energy levels. Never sacrifice sleep, stick to your diet 99%, avoid alcohol, and ban any kind of drama in your life. When your energy is taken care off, you'll notice that you make better choices that assist you in your your goals.

This is very accurate. Ya, this week has been shit because this ive been so undisciplined with this Korean chick.

Like it got to the point where both of us decided to see each other less because of how little sleep we were getting.

With CA though, I realize I'm lacking skills and this pisses me off. So even though I still want to get laid a lot, I wanna refine my process and get laid via CA. And then get laid with legit hotties.

Even if all my sexual needs are met, not doing CA, or even hooking up with legit super hot girls would bother me forever.

I know I'd be 15 years down the road and be thinking 'Man I was so close to fucking some models, why didn't I just push through?'

Regards advice, i finally got to a point where i felt id spent too long on girls

I was pushing 3 years on it (though covid affected so more like 1.5 good years worth of time)

Ya I don't think I'm there yet. I think I could stop now and chalk everything as a win. But I don't think I'm mentally there.

Maintaining a harem (not to mention creating one) takes a huge amount of time and energy. Going mono would make go crazy missing the variety

I think eventually I could go mono, and focus on other areas of life.

But it's odd, once you get the taste of being able to fuck a lot of girls, it really does change your outlook.

I thought I'd maybe sleep with 10-15 girls and be happy with that. But now 15 seems incredibly low, and like a waste of potential almost.

Re: Breakup - yeah, they're never easy. You read my breakup article so you know that I have been through exactly what you're going through (I've been through it multiple times). You did the right thing here. You'll feel better in a week or two, I promise

Already feel better.

 

[Toast]

Like I said I need to decide for myself where I stand. Because I'm getting legit jealousy seeing @Toast and @Crisis_Overcomer approach girls. And I don't think that jealousy will go away.

This statement kinda reveals ur true feelings about what u want to do. Ur happy with ur Korean Wife. But deep down u want to approach and that's where the jealousy comes from

 

[Che2022]

What happen to day 21?

 

[Manganiello]

What happen to day 21?

Didn't do it til later. Keep in mind I did the program during a lockdown.

I judged high fives to be a bit too much at that stage. It wasn't til sundleboro and Toast tried it that I did it too.

In fact a lot of girls liked the confidence of high giving people during COVID. So I think I was wrong to postpone them.

Anyway to answer your Q.

Day 21 isn't there, but it's totally fine to do them now.

 

[Manganiello]

Update


Going steady with the Korean chick
Seeing this Korean girl for 3 months. And it's absolutely great. Spending the entire weekend together, going for walks, hikes, weekend trips.

I had it in my mind to (probably) be monogamous when I go hard into making money. So having a monogamous gf now and get the experience will be valuable down the road.



Got briefly confused about my next goal

I'm not the fat virgin in my parents house anymore. I got a cute girlfriend, I live in the best place in the city, and there's always fun things to do.

As soon as things heated up with this girl I got confused tho.

I wanted to keep improving my game. But I loved my lifestyle. Things were/are better than ever. And better by a lot.



Super high quality problem. But it was probably the most confusing problem I've had in the last 5 years. Seriously.



March to May
I just wasn't motivated or excited about life in general. Didn't really post about it all because I didn't want to make a long whiny thread.

I needed to get introspective
And I did.


Went to Toronto 2 weeks ago.
Hung out with september and it was an absolute blast. September is a great guy who has come a long way. And has a lot to offer if he gives advice. Really enjoyed hanging out with him and Marco (guy who gamed 10 years ago and is not on the forum).


Actually I need to single out september and Marco for showing me that I actually wasn't ready to settle down.

And specifically,Radical who reached out to me for no reason to check-in. And gave me world-class advice on dating, settling down and being true to yourself (traveling and doing what you want).

And also Toast for giving me an objective lens to see how I've been thinking about life. Specifically that Toronto was always a means to an end. I really like Toronto, but I was going there because Calgary sucked ass. Not because Toronto was this awesome dreamland I wanted to live in.

Actually it was talking with Toast that made me realize I wanted to go to Korea.

...




The Main Lesson I've picked up over the last few months.


Girlfriend = Danger of Retiring Prematurely

More experienced guys seems to all unanimously know this. But it was news to me. MOST guys who are inexperienced get a girlfriend and drop off the face of the earth.

That explains why Toast and Master, and I all more or less got a girlfriend and got quiet.

I can't speak for master. But I know it was Incredibly confusing because I finally had what I always wanted. An awesome girlfriend. It's like a girl who is the mirror image of you in terms of outlooks on life and values. The sex is great, and it's very consistent. (7+ times a week) It's great.

Life Quality skyrockets, but what if you don't feel ready to settle?....

What if you want more? What if you still want to bang more hot girls.


I found this topic to be poorly covered in general. How to text girls sells. But what do when you have the girl doesn't sell as well. So the content covering it has a lot less ink.


Life (honestly) more or less felt perfect. I had 'made it' in terms of having a great girlfriend. And there wasn't any high grade pain driving me crazy and forcing me to change. So the need to change is pretty much gone. But you're not exactly satisfied either.

Im pretty sure Toast felt the same about this.


So if felt like a no-win situation. I'd regret settling down because I wanted more out of my sex phase. And I felt bad for dropping this girl because life was so fucking good.


Going East instead of West
What changed.

Eventually I realized. You're not any good at getting girls if you feel like you can't get another girl at the same caliber as the girl you currently have. Not just in terms of looks. But also values and similarities.

Radical kind of made me realize when you date a lot, 1/50 girls will seem like a perfect match. 1/10 will seem great. Knowing that general ratio made such a huge difference, honestly. Because I can kind of see it from my own experience.


I went to Toronto to sort out and feel out what I actually wanted. What became very obvious when I was there, was that I enjoyed Ktown in Toronto, more than Toronto itself.

Toronto is a legendary place to game btw. Volume is absolutely insane.

But I knew if I moved to Toronto my mind would always be wondering about Korea, where as if I moved to Seoul I wouldnt even care about Toronto.

^^That realization^^ Basically did it for me.


Korea it is.


...


Resources that helped

If anyone is confronted with this particular challenge. I think it's important to acknowledge it's a legit problem.

One - Chris and Derek talk about when you're done your dating phase.
https://youtu.be/lmKJ02Bz-HM
Watch at 1:01:00

Two - Talking to guys who are into game and have had a few girlfriend.

Three - Reading over your old goals. And going on a vacation away from friends, family *and* the girl you like.




....




What's next?


I need to lose weight.
I crept back up to 179 lbs. Or 81 kgs.

I need to save up money.
This has been improving. But I want to be able to live in Seoul for 6 months without a job.

I need to learn Korean.
Besides knowing the basic alphabet. I can barely speak any Korean.

밥 - means rice I think. I'm not very good lol.


...

Actions

Learn Korean
Lined up 3 different tutors for learning Korean. Will keep 1-2 of the best. Or hottest. Lol

Back on keto. Again.
I don't even like writing this. I need to a serious longterm way or making this stick. Weight has been more or less hovering around 170-175 for the last year.

Enjoy Life
Continue seeing this Korean girl. Working hard. Hitting goals, getting better and enjoying life. Not crucial, but man it makes life more enjoyable.



----

Lots to catch-up on. I'll catch up on logs/comments in a bit.

 

[Squilliam]

I always wondered where you were at, it's been forever since you posted. Honestly, this is such a wholesome story. Hope you have fun in Korea

 

[Manganiello]

I always wondered where you were at, it's been forever since you posted. Honestly, this is such a wholesome story. Hope you have fun in Korea

Thanks dude.

I'll be here for awhile still.
Korea probably won't be til next year.


I really was just posting this because I know Toast and Master didn't really document it. And I know it's a super common phenomenon to have a super active guy get a gf and disappear.

 

[Holden]

When I was 18 I also got a mono-girlfriend for 3 years. Which wasn't planned but it was full of valuable lessons (and my first threesome.)

Just like Chris I recommend it to newbies, if only to learn how to fuck.

But nowadays my mind is dead-set on the MLTR model where I see 2-3 girls simultaneously with some degree of emotional attachment. But to have the frame to pull this off, I think you need experience.

The main danger is that a guy actually learns to attract women and then he's sucked into a relationship with the first girl who shows actual interest in him, instead of realizing that with a few extra months/years of practice he'd get a much higher quality girl.

My second girlfriend was hotter, smarter, kinder and more feminine than my first.

The ratio thing is very real. In my experience amazing sexual chemistry only happens with 1 in 10 girls. That's only 7 girls so far and my lay count is pretty high. And sexual chemistry, while a necessary component, is not a sufficient component for a relationship. So she'll need other qualities as well. 1 in 50 sounds about right.

There's a reason all the old school PUA material says you're only "allowed" to get a girlfriend after 25/50 lays. It's mainly so you don't get sucked into a relationship with the first girl that shows interest. But for the purposes of learning how to fuck, I'm all for doing this the old fashioned way for a few years, and experiment the fuck out of it.