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Silver's Log - job interviews and fear.
- Thread starter Sin Silver
- Start date
Sin Silver
Member
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2020
I said I would aim for an update every Wednesday, but I am going to make tomorrows entry today. I’m visiting my best friend tomorrow, so I won’t have time to make an entry.
It’s been over a week since my massive fallout with one of my oldest friends(See last entry), and I am still processing what happened. I’ll discuss that at the end of this post, but for now, I want to start discussing some more positive actions.
I’m still smashing it at the gym. I’ve realised how good going to the gym is not just for my physical health, but for my mental health aswell. When I was getting stressed at work last week, I found myself thinking “Damn, I just want to get out of here and down to gym”. I think it’s a huge improvement in terms of coping mechanisms. I’m not chasing drink, junk food, or computer games to release frustration, only a bloody good work out. It’s only been a year, but I think this small change is going to have massive implications for the rest of my life.
Talking about coping mechanisms. I’m planning to go see my best friend tomorrow, I haven’t seen him in ages. He works to Alton Towers, the biggest theme park in the UK, so he will be getting us staff tickets to get in. Spending time with my best mate flying on roller coasters is exactly what I need.
I’ve started to get the ball rolling on buying my first property. For a bit of background, I have been living with my parents for the last three years, which has allowed me to save a lot of money. It has limited my freedom and capacity for seeing women, but it was definitely the right move in terms of long term financial stability. I’ve done a few flats viewing, and have looked at getting a mortgage in principle. I plan to view at least three or more properties by my next post. I’ll also explore other options too.
Regarding my mate, I have a lot of mixed feelings, and I’m still trying to find my way through them.
I do resent and hate him for what he has done.
He can be very inconsiderate of feelings and needs. The way he got with the girl I bought with me, and screwing me other a month early with the tickets highlights this.
I have known him for ten year though. I know he can be a massive prick, but I still have many great memories with him and I don’t want to taint them with a terrible break up.
I want to be a kind and forgiving person, but if I just let him off for this, I don’t think I would be respecting myself.
If I just pretended like nothing happened, then he won’t change, nothing will change, and he will just go about hurting others and himself.
I plan to sit on this decision for a whilst, see how I feel after a week or so of cooling down.
A lot of people have told me to tell him to F’ off, but I am not sure if that’s the sort of person I want to be.
It’s been over a week since my massive fallout with one of my oldest friends(See last entry), and I am still processing what happened. I’ll discuss that at the end of this post, but for now, I want to start discussing some more positive actions.
I’m still smashing it at the gym. I’ve realised how good going to the gym is not just for my physical health, but for my mental health aswell. When I was getting stressed at work last week, I found myself thinking “Damn, I just want to get out of here and down to gym”. I think it’s a huge improvement in terms of coping mechanisms. I’m not chasing drink, junk food, or computer games to release frustration, only a bloody good work out. It’s only been a year, but I think this small change is going to have massive implications for the rest of my life.
Talking about coping mechanisms. I’m planning to go see my best friend tomorrow, I haven’t seen him in ages. He works to Alton Towers, the biggest theme park in the UK, so he will be getting us staff tickets to get in. Spending time with my best mate flying on roller coasters is exactly what I need.
I’ve started to get the ball rolling on buying my first property. For a bit of background, I have been living with my parents for the last three years, which has allowed me to save a lot of money. It has limited my freedom and capacity for seeing women, but it was definitely the right move in terms of long term financial stability. I’ve done a few flats viewing, and have looked at getting a mortgage in principle. I plan to view at least three or more properties by my next post. I’ll also explore other options too.
Regarding my mate, I have a lot of mixed feelings, and I’m still trying to find my way through them.
I do resent and hate him for what he has done.
He can be very inconsiderate of feelings and needs. The way he got with the girl I bought with me, and screwing me other a month early with the tickets highlights this.
I have known him for ten year though. I know he can be a massive prick, but I still have many great memories with him and I don’t want to taint them with a terrible break up.
I want to be a kind and forgiving person, but if I just let him off for this, I don’t think I would be respecting myself.
If I just pretended like nothing happened, then he won’t change, nothing will change, and he will just go about hurting others and himself.
I plan to sit on this decision for a whilst, see how I feel after a week or so of cooling down.
A lot of people have told me to tell him to F’ off, but I am not sure if that’s the sort of person I want to be.
Aspire2Greatness
Member
- Joined
- Sep 13, 2021
Sin Silver said:
Preach! Killing it in the gym is one of the best things to be addicted to
PinchePendejo
Member
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2021
Sin Silver said:
The fact that you're considering forgiving him shows you're a bigger person than most. If you do manage to do it...remember that doesn't mean you go back to being best friends as you were. He HAS to change. Let him prove that. Either way, I would work to move on from it. And I wouldn't have the relationship you originally had. Get some distance between you and him, but remain friendly whenever you do see him, but keep it brief and light.
Honestly you're a very mature guy for handling this the way you are. Kudos to you. A lot of people run and ignore their problems yet you're confronting them in a healthy way. You'll be fine. It may not feel that way...but you will be.
Jacobpalmer123
Member
- Joined
- Jul 27, 2020
I suppose just don't let girls you like around him unless you want to "test" her loyalty. I would minimize time with him though.
It's unfortunate to say, but her past in a way predicted her future. Always good to look at a girls past.
Personally I just would've cut her off I wouldn't have texted her. She's a fwb not a gf and she's proven to be disloyal. The point of an fwb, is to see if they are gf material.
Sounds like your in a better headspace. Best of luck. The gym always makes me feel better too.
It's unfortunate to say, but her past in a way predicted her future. Always good to look at a girls past.
Personally I just would've cut her off I wouldn't have texted her. She's a fwb not a gf and she's proven to be disloyal. The point of an fwb, is to see if they are gf material.
Sounds like your in a better headspace. Best of luck. The gym always makes me feel better too.
Adrizzle
Member
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2021
Man this sucks. Don’t get too into your emotions tho.
I right way for a mate to handle this would be talking to you first before he did something or at least owning up to it being a dog move.
Cut his guy. I don’t burn bridges completely. I would have texted him “you own me a girl”. He probably won’t pay up but he should know what the score is.
Edit - read the text you sent to your mate. You are clearly trying to be diplomatic but non of the anger/emotion comes through via the text man. He did some dog shit and has WASTED YOUR FUCKING TIME having to deal with this shit.
I right way for a mate to handle this would be talking to you first before he did something or at least owning up to it being a dog move.
Cut his guy. I don’t burn bridges completely. I would have texted him “you own me a girl”. He probably won’t pay up but he should know what the score is.
Edit - read the text you sent to your mate. You are clearly trying to be diplomatic but non of the anger/emotion comes through via the text man. He did some dog shit and has WASTED YOUR FUCKING TIME having to deal with this shit.
Sin Silver
Member
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2020
Hard2Focus said:Sin Silver said:
Preach! Killing it in the gym is one of the best things to be addicted to
It's a great feeling wanting to go to the gym. It is the first thing in the mornings on my days off now.
Thanks for all the words of support regarding my friend everyone. I am going to sit on it, and then send him another message later this week.
Sin Silver
Member
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2020
I'm absolutely exhausted today and will be grabbing an early night soon after writing this. I was going to skip or delay this weeks entry, but I don't want to make a habit of doing that, so here is a brief outlook of the last week.
Still on the cut for my August conventions/festivals. My weight loss has slowed, so I might need to increase my calorie deficit.
I went to a fetish club last weekend and played with a lot of people. I spent a lot of intimate time with a girl, that start with me caning her breast in front a of a crowd, to me giving her multiple orgasms and getting a BJ. I will write up how this went in much more detail in my next entry.
I found out last night that a very dear friend of my is recovering from brain surgery. I have spent today organising a gift package for them, which is how I probably spent so much energy prior to writing this.
Still on the cut for my August conventions/festivals. My weight loss has slowed, so I might need to increase my calorie deficit.
I went to a fetish club last weekend and played with a lot of people. I spent a lot of intimate time with a girl, that start with me caning her breast in front a of a crowd, to me giving her multiple orgasms and getting a BJ. I will write up how this went in much more detail in my next entry.
I found out last night that a very dear friend of my is recovering from brain surgery. I have spent today organising a gift package for them, which is how I probably spent so much energy prior to writing this.
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2021
Lesson here: you are the sum of your close circle.
If you run with the lame, you develop a limp.
Iron sharpens iron.
Your post triggered me a lot. It raised a lot of disgust in me, I suppose it brought back memories.
Part of me cannot believe you have 'friends' like that. This is me being judgemental, but I think there is a point to be made. If you're serious about becoming a success: WHAT THE FUCK?!
I would not spend any of my time, legit none, with a loser cunt like that. Harsh but true. I thoroughly vet people and ensure they're on the same path to me and are on their way to big things. Otherwise, it's not really going to be a good fit for either of us.
I can vouch 100% for my friends and peers on this path, and know I can build businesses with them, have incredible times with women and travelling etc. They're high quality men and there is a mutual respect, it is hard to build this network man, and no one who is weak is allowed in.
Cutting poison out is GREAT. I am very aggressive about this and have cut off people I knew for 10, 20 years sometimes. Because they became toxic. So it was GOODBYE. I have done this a few times dude.
Nothing comes above your success. Success is a TEAM SPORT.
High quality men are RARE. Pussy is an abundant thing. Building a relationship with a quality man takes months if not years, and can be destroyed in 1 second. It is also so valuable it is precious as diamond.
My circle have consistently brought me good things and I have added value to their life. I will continue to until we have all made it. Then, it is on them to live the rest of their days as champions.
If this is the energy you want, you have some thinking to do......
MAC
If you run with the lame, you develop a limp.
Iron sharpens iron.
Your post triggered me a lot. It raised a lot of disgust in me, I suppose it brought back memories.
Part of me cannot believe you have 'friends' like that. This is me being judgemental, but I think there is a point to be made. If you're serious about becoming a success: WHAT THE FUCK?!
I would not spend any of my time, legit none, with a loser cunt like that. Harsh but true. I thoroughly vet people and ensure they're on the same path to me and are on their way to big things. Otherwise, it's not really going to be a good fit for either of us.
I can vouch 100% for my friends and peers on this path, and know I can build businesses with them, have incredible times with women and travelling etc. They're high quality men and there is a mutual respect, it is hard to build this network man, and no one who is weak is allowed in.
Cutting poison out is GREAT. I am very aggressive about this and have cut off people I knew for 10, 20 years sometimes. Because they became toxic. So it was GOODBYE. I have done this a few times dude.
Nothing comes above your success. Success is a TEAM SPORT.
High quality men are RARE. Pussy is an abundant thing. Building a relationship with a quality man takes months if not years, and can be destroyed in 1 second. It is also so valuable it is precious as diamond.
My circle have consistently brought me good things and I have added value to their life. I will continue to until we have all made it. Then, it is on them to live the rest of their days as champions.
If this is the energy you want, you have some thinking to do......
MAC
Sin Silver
Member
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2020
Okay, so I after work, I started writing a entry regarding a girl I met and slept with a a BDSM club, however, some real life drama caught up with me, so I haven't had time to write full thing out yet.
That being said I promised myself one update a week, so I'm going to post the rest of my update atleast.
House wise, I now have a mortgage in principle. I’ve booked three viewing for this weekend; I plan to spend the next month looking at future homes before I commit to buying anything. As tempting as it is to just buy the first one, I see, I know I need to really take my time and look around.
I have also started a continuous professional development program at work. I’m setting myself training targets and goals at work to achieve. I’m also setting what I call ‘habit builders’ Which I hope will allow me big changes to my regular day to day work practices and attitude. I want focus on climbing the ladder at work, this means being very aware of what skills and experiences I need to develop, as well as the mindset and outlook required to climb he ladder.
Keep your eyes on this spot for some juicy and spicey stories,
That being said I promised myself one update a week, so I'm going to post the rest of my update atleast.
House wise, I now have a mortgage in principle. I’ve booked three viewing for this weekend; I plan to spend the next month looking at future homes before I commit to buying anything. As tempting as it is to just buy the first one, I see, I know I need to really take my time and look around.
I have also started a continuous professional development program at work. I’m setting myself training targets and goals at work to achieve. I’m also setting what I call ‘habit builders’ Which I hope will allow me big changes to my regular day to day work practices and attitude. I want focus on climbing the ladder at work, this means being very aware of what skills and experiences I need to develop, as well as the mindset and outlook required to climb he ladder.
Keep your eyes on this spot for some juicy and spicey stories,
Sin Silver
Member
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2020
I would bore you all with an update on my house search, or how hot it has been at the gym, but I have a juicy story for you all this week!
I attend a BDSM club about an hour’s drive from my house. I’ve been on the scene for a good five years now, and it’s been a great way to go out and meet new people in an intimate setting. I live in a very rural part of the UK, so going out and meeting new, young people at the weekend is a major challenge. My solution to this has been traveling to this club about an hour’s drive away. If I want a social life, then I must put the effort in.
I’m told it is one of the best in the UK, and it stands out as fantastic compared to everywhere I have been in the past. It’s an incredibly welcoming environment, and I have made a lot of friends there already.
I arrived at the club the Friday night, and go to stand in the que. I know that the moment I get in that que, the game is on, and without hesitation I say hello to the women in front of me “Hey, I’m Silver, nice to meet you”.
She’s tall, maybe an inch short of 6ft, slim build, long black dress with short brown hair. We get talking about ourselves, she tells me it’s her first time, and that she was in town for the weekend to look at house to rent. I tell not many people have the courage to come by themselves, and I was impressed by her bravery. I get good vibes from her, but I decided to split when I had the chance at sign in. I didn’t want to crowd her or seem too eager to early.
I spent an hour chatting with people I knew and introducing myself to new people to get in the mood and get my social juices going. I went and had an impact session two people I’d just met, I’d explain more about what that entails, but I want to focus on this girl today.
After about an hour, I head into one of the big play rooms. The event organiser was demonstrating this game they had invented. It was a dice BDSM game, role two dice, one dice has the punishment,(caning, flogging, spanking, etc), the second has the area(Booms, bum, thighs etc) and the last one was the number of strikes. Lots of Doms and Subs were taking it in turns to go up and play, and the crowd where counting and cheering along. I notice the girl I saw earlier sitting by her self off to one side. Her black dress was off, and she was wearing this one piece nightwear. I waited for a quite moment in the game and slipped in next to her and started making small talk, discussing the game at hand. I asked her if she want interested in playing and she was quite eager, so I suggested we join in together when we got the chance.
When our opportunity worse, we went to the front of the room and rolled the dice…. Breasts… Caning… 14… They’re was a little cheer from the crowd, and she seemed quite excited. I was nervous, I’ve never played with her before, and now we had to do some caning. I would have to watch her carefully, and communicate well to ensure she was safe and happy with this.
I was given one of the house canes to use. Quite short, so it’s be easy to use. She took off the top part of her lingeri, her breast was small but perky, with nice full nipples. I smiled at her as rubbed the cane across them, finding my distance, and imaging the swing in my head.
I smiled to myself and took the swing, sharp and quick to sting, but not bruise. She winced and gasp as I struck her, and the crowed counted ‘One!’ with the first strike. I mixed up the stirkes, aiming above or below the nipples, varying the strength and depths of the strikes until I could find her limit.
After we were done, I walked her by hand back to our corner of the room. Knowing she might need immediate aftercare, I immediately put my arm around her and pulled her in firmly. I asked her ‘Hey, are you okay with this’ and she said ‘yes, thanks for asking’. I spoke to her briefly about how she felt after the experience and before I knew it her lips are wrapped around mine, and were just making out in the room full of people(As you do at these kinds of events)
We played a few more rounds of the game, but once we were done, I took her of to one side. I spent a good two to three hours that night. I started off with massaging, before moving onto flogging and spanking. I mixed it up, escalated and deescalated. I gave her time to rest but always kept her wanting more. When it was time to peak, I pulled out the Doxy wand (A fantastic recommendation from Andy) and I made her cum six times in my arms. We didn’t have sex that night as she was on her period. We did have sex later, but that’s a story for another time.
I’m still have a lot to learn on the public BDSM scene. I have felt nervous in the past, when I have played in public, but this night was fanatic for me. I felt in control and knew what I was doing. I took my time, I wasn’t nervous, I really enjoyed it, and the process and experience felt natural.
I’m really looking forward to my next event at this Friday. I want to push and put more effort into these events. I feel they are really helping me grow as a person, helping me communicate with people, and be more empathetic.
I attend a BDSM club about an hour’s drive from my house. I’ve been on the scene for a good five years now, and it’s been a great way to go out and meet new people in an intimate setting. I live in a very rural part of the UK, so going out and meeting new, young people at the weekend is a major challenge. My solution to this has been traveling to this club about an hour’s drive away. If I want a social life, then I must put the effort in.
I’m told it is one of the best in the UK, and it stands out as fantastic compared to everywhere I have been in the past. It’s an incredibly welcoming environment, and I have made a lot of friends there already.
I arrived at the club the Friday night, and go to stand in the que. I know that the moment I get in that que, the game is on, and without hesitation I say hello to the women in front of me “Hey, I’m Silver, nice to meet you”.
She’s tall, maybe an inch short of 6ft, slim build, long black dress with short brown hair. We get talking about ourselves, she tells me it’s her first time, and that she was in town for the weekend to look at house to rent. I tell not many people have the courage to come by themselves, and I was impressed by her bravery. I get good vibes from her, but I decided to split when I had the chance at sign in. I didn’t want to crowd her or seem too eager to early.
I spent an hour chatting with people I knew and introducing myself to new people to get in the mood and get my social juices going. I went and had an impact session two people I’d just met, I’d explain more about what that entails, but I want to focus on this girl today.
After about an hour, I head into one of the big play rooms. The event organiser was demonstrating this game they had invented. It was a dice BDSM game, role two dice, one dice has the punishment,(caning, flogging, spanking, etc), the second has the area(Booms, bum, thighs etc) and the last one was the number of strikes. Lots of Doms and Subs were taking it in turns to go up and play, and the crowd where counting and cheering along. I notice the girl I saw earlier sitting by her self off to one side. Her black dress was off, and she was wearing this one piece nightwear. I waited for a quite moment in the game and slipped in next to her and started making small talk, discussing the game at hand. I asked her if she want interested in playing and she was quite eager, so I suggested we join in together when we got the chance.
When our opportunity worse, we went to the front of the room and rolled the dice…. Breasts… Caning… 14… They’re was a little cheer from the crowd, and she seemed quite excited. I was nervous, I’ve never played with her before, and now we had to do some caning. I would have to watch her carefully, and communicate well to ensure she was safe and happy with this.
I was given one of the house canes to use. Quite short, so it’s be easy to use. She took off the top part of her lingeri, her breast was small but perky, with nice full nipples. I smiled at her as rubbed the cane across them, finding my distance, and imaging the swing in my head.
I smiled to myself and took the swing, sharp and quick to sting, but not bruise. She winced and gasp as I struck her, and the crowed counted ‘One!’ with the first strike. I mixed up the stirkes, aiming above or below the nipples, varying the strength and depths of the strikes until I could find her limit.
After we were done, I walked her by hand back to our corner of the room. Knowing she might need immediate aftercare, I immediately put my arm around her and pulled her in firmly. I asked her ‘Hey, are you okay with this’ and she said ‘yes, thanks for asking’. I spoke to her briefly about how she felt after the experience and before I knew it her lips are wrapped around mine, and were just making out in the room full of people(As you do at these kinds of events)
We played a few more rounds of the game, but once we were done, I took her of to one side. I spent a good two to three hours that night. I started off with massaging, before moving onto flogging and spanking. I mixed it up, escalated and deescalated. I gave her time to rest but always kept her wanting more. When it was time to peak, I pulled out the Doxy wand (A fantastic recommendation from Andy) and I made her cum six times in my arms. We didn’t have sex that night as she was on her period. We did have sex later, but that’s a story for another time.
I’m still have a lot to learn on the public BDSM scene. I have felt nervous in the past, when I have played in public, but this night was fanatic for me. I felt in control and knew what I was doing. I took my time, I wasn’t nervous, I really enjoyed it, and the process and experience felt natural.
I’m really looking forward to my next event at this Friday. I want to push and put more effort into these events. I feel they are really helping me grow as a person, helping me communicate with people, and be more empathetic.
Spider Jerusalem
Member
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2021
Sin Silver
Awesome story dude!
^
This 100%. Small town in the Midlands I come from and it is tough to meet folk my own age. I'm starting to realise I also need to put the effort in if I want the social life.
I got asked to a BDSM/Swingers club a couple of years ago, but didn't have the bollocks to go and I didn't think it would be my kind of thing.
Something I may consider now I'm a bit more experienced and open as I've grown up a little
Congrats on the lay and thanks for sharing
Spider
Awesome story dude!
Sin Silver said:
^
This 100%. Small town in the Midlands I come from and it is tough to meet folk my own age. I'm starting to realise I also need to put the effort in if I want the social life.
I got asked to a BDSM/Swingers club a couple of years ago, but didn't have the bollocks to go and I didn't think it would be my kind of thing.
Something I may consider now I'm a bit more experienced and open as I've grown up a little
Congrats on the lay and thanks for sharing
Spider
Sin Silver
Member
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2020
Holden said:
This event cost me a £10, which is the price everyone pays. I know the price can go as high as £30 for a single guy on the swingers nights, but I am not a huge fan of those.
My advice is just go and talk to people there, don't go in pressuring yourself into thinking the nights a failure if you don't play(BDSM) or have sex. No one is keeping track, or going to think less of you if you try and fail either. There is usually a large social scene there, so theres plenty of people to talk to, even if you don't join in with the BDSM or Swingers.
Sin Silver
Member
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2020
Spider Jerusalem said:
Sin Silver
Member
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2020
The gender balance is surprisingly even!
I believe it's because men stil have to find a women who wants to play with them you just can't go an expect easy sex unless you have already got the confidence.
I remeber one night they did have Czech Glory holes, which had alot of less attractive men queing, but that wasn't for me.
I believe it's because men stil have to find a women who wants to play with them you just can't go an expect easy sex unless you have already got the confidence.
I remeber one night they did have Czech Glory holes, which had alot of less attractive men queing, but that wasn't for me.
Spider Jerusalem
Member
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2021
Sin Silver said:
I might just if opportunity presents!
Sin Silver
Member
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2020
It's been a long day today, so my entry won't be as detailed as normal.
I've booked to go to my first music festival in August. This will be the first one I have gone to and camped, so I'm both nervous and excited. It could be a lot of fun if I go in with the right mind set and organisation, but I also know it going to be really tiring and painful if I'm not well prepared and sensible
The reason I’m so tired today, is I’ve just been to a science conference, which required 6 hour son the road, and a full days work. I’ve been speaking to a lot of companies today, and it’s got me seriously thinking about my career, an area I have been complacent and nervous about the last couple of years. I am going to do some reflective writing on the subject, and aim to post that here next week.
I've booked to go to my first music festival in August. This will be the first one I have gone to and camped, so I'm both nervous and excited. It could be a lot of fun if I go in with the right mind set and organisation, but I also know it going to be really tiring and painful if I'm not well prepared and sensible
The reason I’m so tired today, is I’ve just been to a science conference, which required 6 hour son the road, and a full days work. I’ve been speaking to a lot of companies today, and it’s got me seriously thinking about my career, an area I have been complacent and nervous about the last couple of years. I am going to do some reflective writing on the subject, and aim to post that here next week.