Spider’s Progress Log 🕷 DAY 366: Continuation Log Link ⛓️

Day 142: 02/03/2022 ✅

Day 7 of Antidepressants 💊

I’m on Day 7 of taking my antidepressants and the really bad side effects I think have now subsided.

For someone who isn’t good with tablets this is quite a personal achievement for me.

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
Day 143: 03/03/2022 ✅

Cleaned my Room (Again)

Tidied my room up again today. Small step, but I did it and it was a move in the right direction.

Thanks for reading

Spider 🕷
 
Day 144: 04/03/2022 ✅

Quit My Job 🚪

Quit my job today.

It’s not been very good for my mental health. I’m still off sick, but I don’t even wanna go back into the office for my last shift. My anxiety can’t really cope.

Gonna take a few months off work, go to therapy and get my head straight.

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
Day 145: 05/03/2022 ✅

Buffer Post

I haven’t really got anything to say. Still working through my health issues. Purely a continuity post.

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
Day 146: 06/03/2022 ✅

Stir-Crazy 🏠

Hardly left the house past couple days. Just stayed in with my thoughts.

Literally been on my phone all day today down the rabbit hole of Google📱 Not a good thing when you got health anxiety 👎

Think I need to try get out the house tomorrow. Need to go for a walk or something.

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
Day 147: 07/02/2022 ✅

Formally Resigned 📝

Nothing much today other than I officially quit my job. Technically supposed to work a few days, but I’m extending my sick time Fuck it.

I’m not well and not in the right frame of mind to put up with the job anymore. Doing more harm than good.

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
Crazy to see you go from productive to quitting your job and starting anti depressants. Really feel you on this! Stay strong!
 
Day 148: 08/03/2022 ✅

Quick Post ✍️

Almost forgot to type this post up. Head is all over the place, so I’m trying not to beat myself up too much about that.

I’m hoping I start picking up soon but we’ll see what happens.

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
Day 149: 09/03/2022 ✅

Doctor's Office: Repeat Prescription and Reassurance

I did something I dread today and went to the Doctor.

I hate going - I have anxiety/panic attacks and I didn't sleep last night, so this was a big step for me.

Went o pick up my repeat prescription. Whilst I was there, I had a half-hour appointment with the Doctor. First half was spent discussing the medication I'm on. No issues here and I've been issued a repeat prescription.

Second half was spent discussing my general health - a big part of my anxiety is having heart/lung issues as well as some hidden disease due to what happened to my parents. I feel a lot better after the appointment as the Doctor took her time and did the following:

- Gave me a physical look over
- Listened to my heart (All Good)
- Listened to my lungs (All clear, no abnormalities)
- Reviewed my Full Screen Blood test. Explained that a marker would've triggered if there was any underlying condition
- Took my blood Oxygen level (99% - perfect)
- Informed me that she had no concerns regarding my health and lifestyle
- Explained that I am at a low risk of disease due to my age and lifestyle (non-smoker, non-drinker, not into drugs)
- Offered me a heart scan in hospital if I really wanted it (I am considering this)
- Told me to get some exercise
- Told me to drink plenty of fluids

Basically the Doctor told me that if I had a serious issue with my heart, lungs or any other organs, then all of the tests done so far would have picked some abnormality up which would then be investigated through testing.

I've now spoken to many medical professionals regarding my health who have given me the all-clear and have no concerns.

I'm hoping this is something I can draw a line under and move on from once I get my head around it.

I'm also 2 weeks into my antidepressants as of today. Little milestone.

Thanks for reading

Spider 🕷
 
Day 150: 10/03/2021 ✅

Feeling Jumpy

I had some good news yesterday regarding medical tests - chest exam clear, oxygen level good, blood test no problems etc.

I still feel jumpy though. Very on edge. Think it’s the anxiety doing this.

I’m hoping I start to relax more as time goes on in light of this good news. Trying to chill the Fuck out but it’s hard. Been in the ‘I’m sick/dying’ mindset for so long.

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
Day 151: 11/03/2022 ✅

Keeping Busy: Joe Rogan Podcast #1 🎤 Clean House 🧼 Therapy, Making Plans ➡️

Decided to take Andy's advice regarding keeping busy and working on something to try beat my Depression and Anxiety.

So today I:

- Rang the Therapy Place
Was supposed to have my first session last night, but they Fucked up and I never got the phone call. Rescheduled for 2 Weeks Time.

- Cleaned my Room
Got behind on this due to how I've been feeling. Sorted it in time for the weekend.

- Cleaned my House
Again, got behind on this due to how I've been feeling. Sorted it in time for the weekend.

- Listened to the Joe Rogan Podcast - Episode #1 - Brian Redban.
I get that the earlier episodes aren't as good, but I thoroughly enjoyed the first ever episode. Especially as topics that interest me such as Hunter S. Thompson, Marijuana, Conspiracy Theories were discussed. Looking forward to listening to Episode #2.



- Keeping up with the antidepressants.
I'm over 2 weeks in on them now 💊 Hopefully the good chemicals are well on the way to being built up in my brain and I'll start coping more.

- Made a list of things to do whilst I'm on 'Sabbatical'
Shit like reading, running etc.

Thanks for reading

Spider 🕷
 
Day 152: 12/03/2022 ✅

Joe Rogan Podcast 2 and Cleaned my Bathroom 🚽

Not much to report today - took a bit of a break after cleaning my bathroom. Listened to Episode 2 of Joe Rogan's Podcast whilst I did it. Interesting stuff.



Gonna cut this update here as I'm very tired (tablets) and I think I'll get an early night.

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
Day 153: 13/03/2022 ✅

Realising My Diet/Exercise SUCKS, Checking out GLL and I went for a Walk/Shopping ⬆️

I've come to the realisation today that my diet SUCKS. In addition to this, I don't do any exercise. Off the top of my head, here's what I ate yesterday:

- Cereal
- Toast
- Banana
- Orange Juice
- 3 Chocolate Bars
- 2 Bags of crisps (potato chips for my American friends)
- Chinese Takeaway
- Diet Pepsi

Nutritional value? ZIP. To make matters worse, I'm sedentary. Literally just sit on my ass all day. Is it any Fucking wonder that I feel bad? Sitting in the house all day eating shit must be doing wonders for my physical and mental health!

I had a full screen blood test recently which included a Complete Metabolic Panel. Surprisingly, no nutrient or vitamin deficiencies were found and there's nothing wrong with my internal organs - liver, kidneys etc. all working normally.

Still I need to do something about my diet/exercise and I'll probably see mental health benefit. Will address this and post on here for accountability once I have.

I've also been checking out Good Looking Loser recently. There is a wealth of information on the site as well as the forums. Good to see Andy's humble beginnings and I'm learning a lot from the lay logs and Chris's content. Can see why he's such an inspiring guy.

I also got out the house today and went for a walk. Did a bit of shopping as well just bought some snacks to try cheer myself up a bit and get some ideas for a better diet going forward. Carried on listening to the Joe Rogan show on my walk as I didn't get chance to finish it yesterday.

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
Thats funny I was reading GLL last night going through Hunks logs. Definitely a wealth of knowledge as well as Hollow. It's a shame though a lot of the old OG's tend to delete their old lay reports. Thankfully some people quote them so some of their old logs are still there. But every time I go there I learn something new.
 
Jacobpalmer123 said:
Thats funny I was reading GLL last night going through Hunks logs. Definitely a wealth of knowledge as well as Hollow. It's a shame though a lot of the old OG's tend to delete their old lay reports. Thankfully some people quote them so some of their old logs are still there. But every time I go there I learn something new.
Click to expand...

Jacobpalmer123

Thanks man I'll check those guys out - I have come across a couple of broken/expired/deleted log threads which is a pity a they looked quite 'juicy!' I'm hoping to get back into the dating game once I got my head straight and my anxiety under control. I'm swiping on Tinder on occasion still, but not going all in for the time being.

Thanks for the suggestions

Spider 🕷
 
Spider Jerusalem said:
Day 153: 13/03/2022 ✅

Realising My Diet/Exercise SUCKS, Checking out GLL and I went for a Walk/Shopping ⬆️

I've come to the realisation today that my diet SUCKS. In addition to this, I don't do any exercise. Off the top of my head, here's what I ate yesterday:

- Cereal
- Toast
- Banana
- Orange Juice
- 3 Chocolate Bars
- 2 Bags of crisps (potato chips for my American friends)
- Chinese Takeaway
- Diet Pepsi

Nutritional value? ZIP. To make matters worse, I'm sedentary. Literally just sit on my ass all day. Is it any Fucking wonder that I feel bad? Sitting in the house all day eating shit must be doing wonders for my physical and mental health!
Click to expand...

Bro I can 100% vouch for feeling much better when I've been eating nutritious food and most importantly regularly exercising. I've been a binge eating junk food addict and gone through spells of eating healthy and exercising and the difference in how I felt once I was eating better and being productive fitness wise was monumental. It really can make a difference and I know this is something Joe Rogan will attest to.

I see you've been having a really hard time as of late and I know how junk food and the temporary high of eating it can be the only good feeling you get in a day but that temporary pleasure is nothing compared to the long term pleasure of feeling good about yourself and the way you spent your time. Definitely try and switch it up if you can.

I just feel more proud of myself and happier with myself after a day where I've eaten reasonably and got a run in or something.
 
Striker

Thanks for the solid advice - been having a really shitty time lately worrying about my health and struggling with the anxiety but it’s something I’m trying to work through

Thanks for the input man

Spider 🕷
 
Day 154: 14/03/2022 ✅

Bad Day Filler Post 👎

Bad day today as I had a panic attack so just a brief filler post. I’m exhausted so gonna get my head down soon 🛌

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
Spider Jerusalem said:
@Striker

Thanks for the solid advice - been having a really shitty time lately worrying about my health and struggling with the anxiety but it’s something I’m trying to work through

Thanks for the input man

Spider 🕷
Click to expand...

Yeah keep your head up man, I can relate to a lot of how you feel and how you are acting (staying in your room all day, huge anxiety etc). It's not easy to fix but it CAN be fixed and one day you'll look back on this time in your life and be proud of how far you came. Eating good and exercising can maybe help you kickstart something but I know it's not as easy as just flicking the switch and feeling like being productive.

I know you are listening to Joe Rogan's podcasts right now. I would massively recommend listening to the episode with David Goggins. Well he's done 2 episodes with David Goggins, listen to the older one first. That guy has been as low as you can get and turned it around, his story is fucking amazing and definitely worth your time. I know for one of the OG success stories on here Master this podcast with David Goggins was a massive inspiration for him to turn himself around. I find David Goggins hugely inspirational too, his book is great.

Best of luck mate, we are all behind you. Whatever you do don't stop posting here, even if you have nothing to post. Because I feel like being around people who are also struggling but improving can help.
 
Day 155: 15/03/2022 ✅

Back on Tinder 🔥

Just a quick one. Reactivated my Tinder account and have been taking a look about. Not too much else to report today as I’ve been on another downer.

Thanks for reading 📖

Spider 🕷
 
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