colgate / bulldog
Member
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2021
- Goal
- BANG!! japanese chicks!
- Age
- 27
- Motto
- consistency. acceptance. tumescence.
- Location
- tokyo, japan
Beginning of this week was total shit. I basically spent the whole week going to bed super late, vaping my ass off, and jackin it way too much.
I actually rarely fapped before I joined the forums. Like my sex drive was pretty low and I didn't really jerk off more than 1-3x a month. I even went months at a time without masturbating.
But as I've said recently it's shot back up since I've started meeting girls and screwing up pulls over and over. I probably jerked off at least 20 times over January.
I realized this is just satiating myself without actually deserving it. I don't feel pissed off and aggressive enough during my approach sessions. I'm getting free dopamine hits for doing jack shit.
This also made me truly realize why nicotine is so bad. I've tried to quit a few times but didn't have any reason beyond "well it's better for my throat and my energy is more normal I guess". But the true evil of vaping is similar to fapping, you're just getting free dopamine hits for doing nothing.
I'm not here to be a nofap zealot as this is just my own progress log. But I came to all these conclusions about vaping, fapping, and dopamine because I literally spent Monday-Thursday in bed for 16+ hours (other than a hiking meetup on Wednesday), just vaping, jerking off, and reading group chats. And I didn't feel bad about it or motivated to get up because my body "felt fine" from all the excess dopamine, especially from the vape. I don't know the exact science but I think it's something like that. It's hard to grind and be pissed if you're satiating yourself with bursts of dopamine throughout the day.
To aid in quitting vaping, I've decided to just chow down candy every time I get a craving. I've had trouble going cold turkey without replacing the substance previously, but candy seems to fill in the "fix", at least regarding the flavor and oral fixation. But it doesn't give me a stimulating spike and I still feel irritated after eating candy, which is exactly the feeling I need to progress.
Daygame
Friday 02/04: 4#/25, 2 instadates, 0 pull. ~2.5h including instadates.
Sesh started off with the parking garage being fucking jammed and I couldn't get a spot for about 30 minutes. Combined with getting over my nicotine addiction, this put me in a very irritated mood, which is *exactly* what I need going forward.
Instadates
1 - first approach. girl was like 4'9", I was towering over her even at 5'5". It was fucking awesome. she was also super deadpan. She kind of was like "uhhh uhhh no...." when I pitched the instadate at a boba tea place, but I sensed her wavering and said "Let's go", completely ignoring the rejection. So she tagged along and started asking me questions.
waited 15+ mins for boba tea in packed shop while sitting next to each other on bench. I made chat but I should have physically escalated, not out of increasing chance she'll pull but because I need to do what I want. if anything i can screen more wastes of time out doing this. I'm still kind of nervous on instadates (as opposed to regular dates).
when she got her tea, she immediately ejected out of the store. I was like, great this is going to be a colossal waste of time. I got my tea and followed her into a neighboring bookstore. we continued to make small chat over the next 10 minutes or so as she randomly ejects and enters different stores. at first i ask her "what kind of movies do you like?" and she said "i don't watch movies" (indicator of waste of time), then went for music and talked about classical music and tried pulling with that 3x but no dice. at some point she ejected out of a store and I decided to stand still outside and watch her accelerate away without going for an exchange.
2 - chick declined ID but I spammed "just for 5-10 minutes" a few times and she agreed. at rice x yogurt place. Just standard basic convo, she's leaving for a 1+ week trip tomorrow. went for movie pull after 15-20 minutes, declined after some back and forths. here's an audio clip i started mid-instadate: https://www.sndup.net/jbc2/
Bonus content - chick changes trajectory into construction zone to "avoid talking to strangers". Yeah: https://www.sndup.net/vfzm/
I actually rarely fapped before I joined the forums. Like my sex drive was pretty low and I didn't really jerk off more than 1-3x a month. I even went months at a time without masturbating.
But as I've said recently it's shot back up since I've started meeting girls and screwing up pulls over and over. I probably jerked off at least 20 times over January.
I realized this is just satiating myself without actually deserving it. I don't feel pissed off and aggressive enough during my approach sessions. I'm getting free dopamine hits for doing jack shit.
This also made me truly realize why nicotine is so bad. I've tried to quit a few times but didn't have any reason beyond "well it's better for my throat and my energy is more normal I guess". But the true evil of vaping is similar to fapping, you're just getting free dopamine hits for doing nothing.
I'm not here to be a nofap zealot as this is just my own progress log. But I came to all these conclusions about vaping, fapping, and dopamine because I literally spent Monday-Thursday in bed for 16+ hours (other than a hiking meetup on Wednesday), just vaping, jerking off, and reading group chats. And I didn't feel bad about it or motivated to get up because my body "felt fine" from all the excess dopamine, especially from the vape. I don't know the exact science but I think it's something like that. It's hard to grind and be pissed if you're satiating yourself with bursts of dopamine throughout the day.
To aid in quitting vaping, I've decided to just chow down candy every time I get a craving. I've had trouble going cold turkey without replacing the substance previously, but candy seems to fill in the "fix", at least regarding the flavor and oral fixation. But it doesn't give me a stimulating spike and I still feel irritated after eating candy, which is exactly the feeling I need to progress.
Daygame
Friday 02/04: 4#/25, 2 instadates, 0 pull. ~2.5h including instadates.
Sesh started off with the parking garage being fucking jammed and I couldn't get a spot for about 30 minutes. Combined with getting over my nicotine addiction, this put me in a very irritated mood, which is *exactly* what I need going forward.
Instadates
1 - first approach. girl was like 4'9", I was towering over her even at 5'5". It was fucking awesome. she was also super deadpan. She kind of was like "uhhh uhhh no...." when I pitched the instadate at a boba tea place, but I sensed her wavering and said "Let's go", completely ignoring the rejection. So she tagged along and started asking me questions.
waited 15+ mins for boba tea in packed shop while sitting next to each other on bench. I made chat but I should have physically escalated, not out of increasing chance she'll pull but because I need to do what I want. if anything i can screen more wastes of time out doing this. I'm still kind of nervous on instadates (as opposed to regular dates).
when she got her tea, she immediately ejected out of the store. I was like, great this is going to be a colossal waste of time. I got my tea and followed her into a neighboring bookstore. we continued to make small chat over the next 10 minutes or so as she randomly ejects and enters different stores. at first i ask her "what kind of movies do you like?" and she said "i don't watch movies" (indicator of waste of time), then went for music and talked about classical music and tried pulling with that 3x but no dice. at some point she ejected out of a store and I decided to stand still outside and watch her accelerate away without going for an exchange.
2 - chick declined ID but I spammed "just for 5-10 minutes" a few times and she agreed. at rice x yogurt place. Just standard basic convo, she's leaving for a 1+ week trip tomorrow. went for movie pull after 15-20 minutes, declined after some back and forths. here's an audio clip i started mid-instadate: https://www.sndup.net/jbc2/
Bonus content - chick changes trajectory into construction zone to "avoid talking to strangers". Yeah: https://www.sndup.net/vfzm/