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colgate - FINALLY!!! i get my first daygame lay!!! after 3 years!!!

I already knew this, but yeah the girls are WAY hotter here in Nashville. I really regret basically doing no approaches last week because I have major AA haha.

I went to Kroger at night just to do some shopping, and while there was no volume really, I would have gone up to all 5 girls I saw at the store if this was 3 weeks ago. (I also don't have a bed yet, but I bought one today and I'll pick that up tomorrow)

Anyway here's my 365 project entry for today:
https://soundcloud.com/gloggy365/sep-19-2021-just-go-up-to-her
 
Gym:
Bench Press 5x5 (actual: 5/5/5/5/3/135x5) - 150 lbs
Weighted Pullups 5x5 - 20/20/25/25/25lbs
Cable Crunches 5x15 - 72.5 lbs

I managed to hit on 3 girls at the gym. Just getting back into the groove.

Went to Wal-Mart to buy some things for my new room and I honestly pussed out at like 4 or 5 girls. Then there was a cute af Asian chick with her friend and I had to pull out "the time to hesitate....has ceased" and force the approach. I had some fantasy that I would bring some girl home from Wal-Mart under the pretense "hey come over and help me set up my room" but then we'd just fuck without even putting the bedsheets on my mattress lol. But I feel like whenever I have some wild fantasy before going out or on some approach session, I psych myself out and get massive AA (this has happened several times, even before I knew what "AA" was or joined these forums, especially going out and night). When I don't really think that it's gonna be some big deal, the AA goes away for the most part.

Then I did some work at a cafe and talked to another girl while waiting for my maccha. She turned me down because she "feels so bad but I have a boyfriend" and I took a step away, about to eject and actually said "have a nice day", but she kept talking to me so I was like whatever I'll just talk until I get my maccha. She actually asked me for my number and I gave it though I don't expect her to text me (I didn't bother taking her number lol). I casually asked if she had some single friends earlier in the convo which is probably why she wanted to exchange phone numbers.

Also another thing that has been kind of weirding me out is when I approach and a girl declines because she has a boyfriend, but then she comments about how bold I am or something. At first I was like "wow! girls like when you go up and compliment them!" but lately it just feels like they can sense in 0.2 seconds that I'm inexperienced and new and so they are trying to give me some consolation prize, and it makes me feel strange.

365 project:
https://soundcloud.com/gloggy365/sep-20-2021

I covered a song because I'm trying to get better at that lol
 
colgate said:
I had some fantasy that I would bring some girl home from Wal-Mart under the pretense "hey come over and help me set up my room" but then we'd just fuck without even putting the bedsheets on my mattress lol. But I feel like whenever I have some wild fantasy before going out or on some approach session, I psych myself out and get massive AA (this has happened several times, even before I knew what "AA" was or joined these forums, especially going out and night). When I don't really think that it's gonna be some big deal, the AA goes away for the most part.

Yeah this psyches me out too, I try not to get lost into fantasies because when I do I get disappointed when I'm not the person I want to be yet ya know?

How'd the gym approaches go?
 
Avihihi said:
How'd the gym approaches go?

1 - i saw this girl as i was walking from the power rack to the pullup bar. staff scolded me for not putting my bag in the cubbies (lol) right in front of her, but I'm not sure if she saw or gave a shit (i think I'm mentioning this because i thought about it too much and was being needy). anyway after a set of pull-ups i caught her on a rest period and went up to her. rejected with "i have a boyfriend but you're so bold! should do this more guys never hit on me at the gym!" she would later come up to me after i did some pull-ups and repeat the sentiment and pat me on the shoulder like a consolation prize (and then return to her own workout)

2 - later in my pull-ups sets, saw a chick as she walked down the stairs and sat on a bench to do dumbbells. pretty standard rejection with bf at the end but she was like "ice cream??" when i mentioned we should get ice cream sometime. "yeah there's some pretty good ice cream here".

3 - saw this girl doing some leg machine. i actually pussed out at first because there was someone i saw earlier in the day next to her (bad reason to puss out), but I was so lucky she was still there after 5m41s of cable crunches. god was calling me an idiot so i respected that and approached. declined with "oh I'm so sorry i feel bad I'm seeing someone". girl #1 was near me so she may have seen this interaction too lol
 
Had my best approach day ever, and setting the standard for what I need to do everyday. Also the first day I don't actually remember how many approaches I did.

9/30~40 in ~1 hour

Started the day off thinking about going to Whole Foods, but then on the way, I saw a super hottie in a flowery dress sitting at a cafe doing nothing (or so I thought). I parked my car and opened her, but she was like "oh I really like that you're so direct, I'm in a work call, let's regroup in 10 mins". I was like ok I'll go grab a drink inside and meet you back here. So I walk towards the door but take a look behind me, and she was immediately walking away from the table, and I was just like "lol of course", but I grabbed a drink anyway. While I was waiting for my drink, I saw her come back and wander right outside the door. I was still inside and noticed, but I decided to wait for my drink instead of going out, which I probably shouldn't have done, because the moment I got my drink, she literally vanished. I decided whatever, I'll chill here for 5-10 mins and dip. She obviously didn't come back so I just dipped and started driving again. After 5 minutes, I had some curiosity whether she would be at that cafe or not so I drove back over, and she wasn't there lol. It's like, okay I'm understanding women more now lol.

No volume at the Whole Foods at 11 am. I approached one girl but she scurried away to her mom (?).

Then I went to the university and holy fuck there were SO many people. I probably pussed out on like 10 girls. I tried to open some Chinese chick but she darted away from me lol. I sat down on some bench like "omg I have so much AA what do i do". I opened the day game WhatsApp and saw a motivating message about how one of the guys is getting so many results because he's really consistent with his approach volume, and all of my AA vanished in an instant.

The approaches themselves were pretty standard, frankly I didn't even think of attempting any dicey approaches because there was just so much volume. I wandered into the medical plaza at some point and there were literally like 8 girls sitting solo at different tables doing nothing. I just played pinball and approached like all of them. The easiest possible approaches in the world. I think I did a lot of dicey approaches in my old city because I could never get volume, but I felt like I didn't even have to try here.

Later I went to go get some work done at a boba tea shop and was able to approach 3 girls there. I opened a pretty chubby girl who was watching anime because I'm also a fucking weeb, but she declined. Not saying "lowering your standards" is necessarily bad advice, but this is just an example of how the attractiveness of the girl doesn't have any impact on whether they'll exchange and etc.

365 project:
https://soundcloud.com/gloggy365/sep-21-2021
I've never written this style before and it was kind of an accident haha. Should be played by an actual band instead of just default Logic patches.
 
Dude you crushed it.

colgate said:
how the attractiveness of the girl doesn't have any impact on whether they'll exchange

You know what's weird? I've heard that advice for so long but my experience was that the hotter girls exchanged more often.


That's cool. Didn't know you made music? How long you been doing it? I've been mixing on Fruity Loops for maybe 15 years.
 
Manganiello said:
That's cool. Didn't know you made music? How long you been doing it? I've been mixing on Fruity Loops for maybe 15 years.

I've been making music since 2012, in various programs. I used to use OpenMPT a lot, and sometimes Ableton Live. Could never really get the hang of FL Studio lol

I had a dry period for the past few years with music because I felt like I couldn't make what I wanted. But cold approaching girls made me realize that I need to EMBRACE adversity (rejections) and that rejections are the prerequisite to successful outcomes, so I decided to start this 365 project of just putting out a lot of stuff even I don't think it's that "good". So I bought a MacBook 2 weeks ago and started learning how to use Logic Pro X.

Here's my regular SoundCloud if you're interested in hearing some of my past work: https://www.soundcloud.com/goluigi-chan/popular-tracks
 
Manganiello said:
You know what's weird? I've heard that advice for so long but my experience was that the hotter girls exchanged more often.

I do think this advice applies in a situation like, you're at a club at night and some not-so-attractive girl is really into you. I think in this situation, if you're inexperienced, you should be aggressive anyway and try to take her back to your place.
 
Seems like Nashville has some really good areas for high volume of approach per min.

Great job out there. 30-40 approaches is really good for somebody so new to approaching.

Have you set up any dates or started texting any of your leads?
 
Gym:
Squats 3x5 - 135 lbs
Overhead Press 3x5 - 105 lbs
Dumbbell Rows 3x10 - 50 lbs
Curls 3x12 - 55 lbs

Gym approaches: 1/3
The exchange I got was a staff member who wanted to explain to me every single drink that was in the fridge, not sure if it was really an approach lmao. I asked for her number and she gave it to me.

Daygame: 5/20~25, 1 hour
Cafe: 0/1
Total: 6/20~25

Went to the uni a bit later in the evening because I had some work calls in the afternoon. Way less volume than noon, but I did what I could. I've been getting pushier with every girl who initially declines my instadates and exchanges, and got more exchanges than I probably would have otherwise. Not pushy enough for an instadate (I got close with this really giggly girl but I acquiesced down to an exchange).

Also got the funniest rejection I've ever had so far:
chick is 4-5 in taller than me, asian
me: hey i just saw you and thought you're really cute
her: uhhh....thanks....haha
me: let's go to the starbucks right down the street
her: uhhh....uh....
me: let's go
her: uh.....uhhh......im busy i have something to do.....
me: ok well let me get your number then (in retrospect i could have kept pushing the instadate lol)
her: uh.....*5 seconds elapses* well...my parents took the sim card out of my phone because of some drama in high school
me: lol ok bye

It's like some female blogger is writing creative ways to reject being approached lmao

Finished off my sesh with a relatively dicey approach (for Nashville), briskly walked across the street to cut off a redhead with really nice legs and tights and got a rejection in like 1 second.

365 project:
https://soundcloud.com/gloggy365/sep-22-2021-blueberry-mango-crash

first time i've ever liveplayed in a song (guitar). i'm pretty new at playing instruments and recording them but i had a riff idea i was playing over and over so i just made it into a song.
 
Toast said:
Have you set up any dates or started texting any of your leads?

I spammed "sup it's colgate" to all of them. One girl asked me what grade I was in lmfao. Another girl said she was "busy for the next few weeks" but I proposed we meet on Thursday. She said "can I let you know then", so I'll text her tomorrow to see if she's down.

Today I sent my name on every exchange just to confirm that I got their number right/they didn't give me a fake. I wasn't too pushy about it though, and one exchange ended up being a fake. That girl was like "are you doing some sort of research project" and I was like "no I'm trying to meet new people".

I'll probably spam a bunch of texts to the other 14 contacts tomorrow and see if any are down for a date.
 
colgate said:
Toast said:
Have you set up any dates or started texting any of your leads?

I spammed "sup it's colgate" to all of them. One girl asked me what grade I was in lmfao. Another girl said she was "busy for the next few weeks" but I proposed we meet on Thursday. She said "can I let you know then", so I'll text her tomorrow to see if she's down.

Today I sent my name on every exchange just to confirm that I got their number right/they didn't give me a fake. I wasn't too pushy about it though, and one exchange ended up being a fake. That girl was like "are you doing some sort of research project" and I was like "no I'm trying to meet new people".

I'll probably spam a bunch of texts to the other 14 contacts tomorrow and see if any are down for a date.
https://mikemehlman.net/2020/12/01/if-im-persistent-through-texting-is-that-needy/
Read this article if you haven't already

Even if they don't initially respond that doesn't mean an instant rejection.

My current plate was "busy moving. and wouldn't be free for a month"
Literally waited a month and then asked "are you free now"
 
holy fuck today was nuts at every point of the day hahahahh.

Daygame: 12/35~45, 2 hours. 1 instadate
Whole Foods: 0/1
Broadway: 0/1

I don't know what's up with my unusually high exchange rates. I'm getting pretty good at reading body language and reactions and seeing when being pushy will get me a contact. Like if a girl is "searching for a reason" to reject, or if she's kinda giggly, or just not ultra confident, I end up still getting the contact. On the other hand, maybe I'm on an extreme macro positive tilt in the past 3 days (27/85~110, or 1:3~4). The micro positive tilts are like 2~3 exchanges per rejection which is pretty nuts. Maybe it's just Nashville haha.

Notable approaches:
Pushed a black chick with crazy hair 3~4x in front of her friend after she declined me with bf and got an exchange.
---
...
me: lemme get your number
her: uhh no sorry
me: come on gimme your number
her: nows not the time
*i stare at my watch for 3 seconds*
me: ok now's the time
her: uhhh haha sorry nope
---
*i walk out of a convenience store to open an asian girl*
me: hey!
her: really???????
---
me: hey i saw you just now and thought you're attractive
her (in an obvious japanese accent): uhh....im not very good at english.....i gotta go

switched to japanese for the rest of the approach and she suddenly stopped being in a hurry. in japanese she was still like "oh well we just met and i dont give my phone number out" but then i pushed her like "we can go get coffee sometime lets exchange" and then she gave me her number lol. did not expect to open a girl in japanese but thats what happens when u get high volume lol.
---
On my last approach, I puss out on a really easy girl who walks past me and I'm like wtf....go back bro....so I did and then as usual I asked for an instadate
me: "let's go grab some coffee at the starbucks"
her: "oh I'm actually gonna go eat some lunch"
me: "ok let's go"
her: "uhhhhh idk im not a spontaneous person...."
me: "today's the day to be spontaneous then"

So immediately we're walking and she's interested in knowing all about me, including what my major is. I just end up saying that I'm not a student there and I'm trying to meet more people. Then we have the gayest instadate of all time because we talk about nail polish and manicures for 6 minutes and she says we should go to the nail salon together (I've had painted nails for the past few weeks). She said she had class in like an hour so I didn't bother trying to pull or anything and just decided to treat this like a normal date.
Then I walk her to class and she's showing me around campus on the way. We walk inside her building to the classroom, but she's 30 minutes early to class. She tells me we should hang out in the classroom together.
She pulls out her laptop and opens her web browser and literally starts reading the title of every news article on the MSN homepage. I'm like....oh fuck......she knows what's going to happen.........she's literally asking for it. I put my arm around her after 2-3 minutes and then proceed to do literally nothing for the next 8 minutes.
She asks me to show her some of the music I was talking about in the restaurant from earlier, so I just pull up "Mint Condition - Pretty Brown Eyes" and then she's like "oh I like this, this is so simple".
Finally I look at her and say "hey". She looks back and then I go for her lips. She kinda resists for like 2 seconds but then we start kissing. At first she's like "lol slow down" but then we make out for like 5 minutes. omfg how is this even happening lmao
Then the guy who's looking to really get the Dean's award this semester shows up to class at 5:17pm and we're like...oh fuck lmao. We walk outside for a bit and have this exchange:

me: "you down to meet again this weekend"
her: "uh I actually got something on Saturday, but maybe Sunday"
....
her: "hey so I gotta be honest with you....I have a fwb and I don't know if you're okay with that..."
me: "that's ok i approach 40 girls a day"

She laughs and then we have a little chat outside at a table. I straight up told her "look this is what's going to happen, we're going to exchange numbers, and then I'll text you on Sunday and one of three things is going to happen. Either you're going to respond to me and confirm a plan on Sunday, respond and defer me maybe days later or something, or never respond again." and she's like "yeah lol" and then we exchange contacts and have another kiss. But yeah, I'm treating this classroom makeout instadate like any other of my contacts.


Also I finally fucking got a bunch of photos for a Tinder profile thanks to my roommate who is good at photography. I bought him a bunch of drinks tonight at Broadway for helping me out. I'll post them in my tinder pic log when he finishes editing them for some feedback. The night ends with me getting approaching a group of some girls to get a social pic for my Tinder profile, and I get swamped by a bunch of ladies for a picture. One of the girls was like "we'll be in your pic if you buy us drinks", so I ended up just buying them some tequila shots. They peer pressured me into getting one for myself but I'm like nah lol. Then one of those girls was like "what u up to tonight" and i was just like "I came here to get a picture and now I'm leaving". I was just like "nah I'm good" or something lol. She wasn't that attractive and I wanted to come home lol.

On a side note, I got my blood drawn to get my T levels checked. So we'll see how that turns out next week

I really didn't want to do my 365 project but since the non-attempt is failure, I just made something quick
https://soundcloud.com/gloggy365/sep-23-2021-analysis-paralysis

edit: lol this is a fitting 100th post. I think I went from not being able to go up to a girl and call her attractive to a classroom makeout with a girl I barely met 2 hours prior. what will my 200th post be???
 
Dude your absolutely crushing it. Keep it up.
Those are great approaches too.

Idk if there's a link between mood and exchange rates cuz I had the same thing in Toronto. I was really pushy, the exchanges were fun, and a lot od interactions were interesting. Exchange switch a little better than 1/3 of the girls there. Which feels insane.
 
Holy shit dude
That is incredible. Seriously

You're way, way pushier than I am. As soon as a girl indicates she may not be 100% interested in chatting I usually just leave. Being pushier gets you numbers for sure, but I'm wondering, does it get you lays? Cheers
 
lacroix said:
but I'm wondering, does it get you lays?

Lol I haven't lost my v card yet. I'm pretty sure if me and the girl from yesterday had 10-20 more minutes it would have literally turned into a pornography.

I can confirm being pushy works for getting instadates. As I said the girl didn't immediately accept eating lunch together but I only had to push 1x. My calibration from this going forward will be to start getting way pushier with instadates, like I am with exchanges (I've never pushed an instadate more than 1x yet).

I'm pretty new to cold approach and dating in general and have only been in Nashville for 3 days. I think at this point I have most of my anxiety (approach, physical contact) handled, and I think now I have to play the numbers game. That being said, I've not gotten a date from text tennis yet. I've never had so many girls' numbers in my phone so I'm trying stuff and seeing what works and what doesn't.

Hopefully this thread will have some more value in the coming weeks haha
 
Pre-emptively going to write today's log because I think I need to take a step back.

Only did a couple passive approaches:
Gym: 0/2
Cafe: 0/1

I'm taking the entire next week off from work to focus on approaching.

My plan for today was to try to grind out a bunch of work tasks so I wouldn't have to deal with them after next week, but I ended up just being super distracted on my phone. SamJ_ called me out on it last week. I disabled Chrome from my phone again for now. I hated being in the cafe working so much, that one of the staff came up to me and saw my computer and she was like "that looks really hard...I couldn't do that...you look like you're really stressed out" and etc. I also didn't vape today so I have really low energy in general. In fact, I just sat in my car for like 2 hours after the cafe closed.

Also while I've been doing pretty good with approaching this week (other than today), I keep staying up way too late. I usually only spend 1-2 hours on my 365 project when I get home, but since it's my computer, I inevitably get distracted on the Internet instead of writing music. Then I'm like "oh I need to finish my entry for today aaaaaa" and next thing you know it's 4 am (you might have noticed all my logs for this week were written super late at night, that was the reason).

For getting laid, I know I have to play the numbers game and be forward. I think I have that down in my head. But I have all this other crap on the side that I also have to do and it's like too much. I just want to spend all day approaching but then I'm like "oh wait I have to finish some work tasks", "oh wait I have to go to the gym and eat", etc. Time management, staying focused, and having a consistent energy state (since I've showed up to Nashville I've been vaping non-stop so that probably doesn't help this) are my biggest issues now.
 
colgate said:
Time management, staying focused, and having a consistent energy state (since I've showed up to Nashville I've been vaping non-stop so that probably doesn't help this) are my biggest issues now.

I feel you. I have big issues with energy management, probably more than others. I am always absolutely baffled how some guys on here juggle work, gym, approaching and dating.

The sad truth is that you can only go berserk mode for so long. You can overdraw your energy account for a few weeks, maybe months, but then it catches up with you and fucks you hard.

I feel like performance enhancing drugs like coffee also only shift your energy from one point to the other. Coping mechanisms like junk food and probably vaping pull you down further the energy hole.

The best way to get consistent energy is:
- do sports regularly. Having a fit and balanced body carries over to other areas in terms of energy and concentration. It also helps you sleep better. I suggest 3-5 times a week. Doing intense sports more than 5 days a week might even detract from your overall energy imho. Body needs regeneration
- get a stable sleep schedule and enough sleep. You probably underestimate how much sleep is good for you. 90% (or was it 95? not sure.) of people our age need 7-9 hours a night. This does not mean 7 hours is OK for you. This means that if you are lucky and one of the people with not so much need for sleep, then 7 hours is OK for you. Me for example, I am one of the unlucky fuckers that need 9 hours a night. 7-9 is the 90% interval, so some people even need more than 9 hours, even unluckier). Once you have a stable sleep schedule, the amount of sleep you need will become apparent by when you feel tired (just make sure to not be constantly distracted so you NOTICE when you are tired). How to get a stable sleep schedule:
https://web.archive.org/web/20151027081943/http://www.boytoystory.com/the-power-of-a-stable-sleep-schedule

Suggestions for how to get away from your phone/laptop addiction:
- make your screen black/white. Phones are designed to catch your attention, they literally fuck with your brain. You can make that less so by making it visually unappealing. If you make your screen black/white, you can still do all the things that matter, but you won't be tempted as much do go for stupid "entertainment". Look up on the internet how to do that with your phone, the setting is oftentimes hidden somewhere deep in the developers options
- do no-media days. Maybe every Sunday of your week. You turn off your phone and laptop Saturday evening and don't turn it on until Monday morning. It will be crazy, you won't even know what to do with your time. Stick through it, it will enrich your life. Do sports, go to nature, take a walk, get creative with what else to do.
 
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