G.N
Member
- Joined
- Apr 5, 2023
- Goal
- Get a quality gf
- Age
- 22
- Motto
- If you pity yourself, life's an endless nightmare
- Location
- California
Daily Actions:
->No Porn/PMO: No (Relapse)
->Weekly Gym: 3/3
->Today's Calories: 2550 cal
->Today's Sugar intake: 66g
->Today's Protein Intake: 122g
Notes:
Bad relapse today. I usually never relapse due to boredom, but I didn't really leave the house since weather was plain awful today, but boy I was wrong. Photography practice I want to do more outdoors stuff but my battery dies so goddamn fast and I am waiting on my new ones. Pissed off I can't keep longer streaks, may need to implement an expensive blocker on my phone since the free ones do fuck all.
Something I realized lately is I seem to get more turned on by the idea of watching porn. Watching porn itself doesn't have the same rush and I feel super "wtf am I doing" or just "meh" at the end. The comedown sucks. Like I can get an erection literally by just typing something I want to see in the search bar. Then the endorphins and dopamine of thoughts of having that PMO experience just starts rushing to my head. I have a new problem on my hands. I am starting to believe I "Pavloved" myself into getting erections from peeking and thats why my libido just hasn't felt right. This is heavy theory but being so turned on by the thought of watching porn is absolutely not normal for me or anyone so I may have to try and kill any thoughts of wanting to watch porn when they arise. I hate how much its affecting my body, it makes me scared for the future.
On good news though I managed to get a good amount of work done for my internship. Like a good solid few hours while before I could barely sit still. I think when what I am watching for my assignments makes more sense and is interpretable is when I can actually work well. Otherwise I just procrastinate. The first video I watched was really hard to interpret, second one made more sense and that was when I found my groove.
I also managed to go to the gym today. Had a good leg day sesh, and felt sore as shit+tired afterwards.
->No Porn/PMO: No (Relapse)
->Weekly Gym: 3/3
->Today's Calories: 2550 cal
->Today's Sugar intake: 66g
->Today's Protein Intake: 122g
Notes:
Bad relapse today. I usually never relapse due to boredom, but I didn't really leave the house since weather was plain awful today, but boy I was wrong. Photography practice I want to do more outdoors stuff but my battery dies so goddamn fast and I am waiting on my new ones. Pissed off I can't keep longer streaks, may need to implement an expensive blocker on my phone since the free ones do fuck all.
Something I realized lately is I seem to get more turned on by the idea of watching porn. Watching porn itself doesn't have the same rush and I feel super "wtf am I doing" or just "meh" at the end. The comedown sucks. Like I can get an erection literally by just typing something I want to see in the search bar. Then the endorphins and dopamine of thoughts of having that PMO experience just starts rushing to my head. I have a new problem on my hands. I am starting to believe I "Pavloved" myself into getting erections from peeking and thats why my libido just hasn't felt right. This is heavy theory but being so turned on by the thought of watching porn is absolutely not normal for me or anyone so I may have to try and kill any thoughts of wanting to watch porn when they arise. I hate how much its affecting my body, it makes me scared for the future.
On good news though I managed to get a good amount of work done for my internship. Like a good solid few hours while before I could barely sit still. I think when what I am watching for my assignments makes more sense and is interpretable is when I can actually work well. Otherwise I just procrastinate. The first video I watched was really hard to interpret, second one made more sense and that was when I found my groove.
I also managed to go to the gym today. Had a good leg day sesh, and felt sore as shit+tired afterwards.