Sept 18 - Day 11
Date, No Pull + 3 Cancels
Oi, I don't feel like writing this one.
Had 4 dates lined up today. One followed thru, and couldn't pull.
+ No new numbers, and convos that all died online.
Date
Long Story Short
Boring, let the girl decide date plan, pulled 60min in. Nada.
She had an ONS a week or two ago, so I thought she was pullable... idk.
If it was clear she wasn't dtf, I wouldn't feel as mad about this date.
Short Story Long:
20 minutes at Starbucks. Stale convo.
She suggested we go to a vegan place
In my mind: I thought we would walk there, I would suggest a movie as we pass my place or get ice cream at the place and walk back,
Neither really worked. Once we got close to my place she brought up how she used to be an addict. So I'm not sure exactly how to calibrate that topic 30 seconds into it, like say: "Ok cool, drugs and stuff, your life changed. Awesome. Let's go back to my place."
Vegan spot: I order something quick to go. She orders a bowl of food (great). I suggested a walk, she said she had to put her dog out.
I stand up, and she's still eating. I'm like ready to walk off at this point. She finally acquiesces and stands up.
Walk back, I do the movie pull. She immediately decides she needs to walk somewhere else.
Yet says she wants to meet up later. Which I doubt. Felt like a "soft rejection".
Thoughts
Control the date.
Instead of her saying vegan food, I should've said let's watch something first.
Or just agreed to the whole thing, and as soon as she stops talking, just say, cool. Let's go to my place.
The girl I slept with on Wednesday had that exact same scenario. We decided we would go to a bar, but before we got anywhere I suggested my place. And that worked.
Pull faster.
This girl was boring and honestly I would've liked to know where she stood sooner on. And that's on me for not being forward/sexual enough.
When in doubt be aggressive. Then just ended the date if she didn't come back.
I'm gonna miss a few times, but I just hate it when I think I wasn't aggressive with this girl, or I wasn't making it clear about sex at the start with her.
I get killer instinct is like AA, just want to develop it as fast as I can.
Probably a million other mistakes I made that I wasn't even aware of.
3 Cancels
One I saw coming cuz she couldn't get a babysitter for her kid.
One I actually was trying to double book, but she cancelled.
One I booked in after that sucky date (same night date), but she also suggested tomorrow.
New Opportunities
# - 0
New Dates scheduled - 2 (but one is 7 days out, and the other is a past flake)
Matches - 16
Likes - 27
2 Boosts - about maybe 12 likes from that, mostly ugly.
Four Dates lined up tomorrow... I already suspect it won't end up being 4.
Radical said:
Yeah usually i text like 3 hrs before meet up time like ‘Hey, still good for 4?’
Started using this. I like it better than the ambiguous "looking forward to it"