Spider’s Progress Log 🕷 DAY 366: Continuation Log Link ⛓️

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 78: 28/12/2021

️ Podcast with Andy ️

Last night I had my Podcast with Andy where we had a good lengthy discussion for over 2 hours regarding self-improvement, my journey and some of the struggles that I'd faced so far along the way. I cannot state enough how useful I found this last night and I am grateful to Andy for his input and the time he took to go through things with me. I learned a lot from him and he gave me some solid advice. I think I had a couple of epiphanies during our discussion which I reflected on after. I woke up today feeling refreshed, ready to take on the world and to keep going with my self-improvement journey

KillYourInnerLoser I have subscribed to your Patreon - it's not much, but I wanted to do a little something to say thank you for sitting down with me last night. It is much appreciated

Andy gave me 2 exercises to do to help confront my feelings of inadequacy and not being good enough which I have started on:

- Looking in the mirror and stating positive affirmations for 7 days (1/7)

Did this today when I woke up. I confronted myself in the mirror and stated to myself 5 times 'I like you'. I found this quite difficult as it's something I haven't done before. There was a time in my life where I hated looking in the mirror at myself as I had this weird notion that I hated myself and didn't like what I saw. I did this with my blinds shut as I kept thinking 'what if the neighbours look in?'. I will do this 6 more times this week as I think this will be a worthwhile exercise. I'm going to try to work up to saying 'I love you' to myself, but I don't think I'm quite ready for that yet.

- Writing down a list of 50 things I like about myself

I have started on this today. I've got a few things written down, but not many. Andy has suggested I ask friends and family what they like about me (not why they like me) and write down some of the ideas. If anybody on here has any insights form my posts, I would be most grateful for things to add as I'm not very good at complimenting myself.

- Dealing with confronting my past trauma

When I think about the past trauma or bullshit situations I've been in, sometimes I mutter and swear under my breath. Andy has suggested taking myself away from the situation and looking at the root cause of this and confronting it. I haven't done this yet today, but next time it happens, this is something I will do

- Listened to Episode #95 of Andy's Podcast - Day 95: What Tricks/Shortcuts Have Helped Me Get Laid More?

Some solid advice here. Particularly confronting your nerves and accepting you'll suck at it. I liked the Slight Edge aspect too - just keeping at it consistently. Using the forums for support is also a good idea - It's worked very well for me when I've posted on here and received good advice from the forum members. Appreciate the support from everyone

- Listened to Episode #96 of Andy's Podcast - Day 96: A Typical Day in the Life of a Guy Who Gets Laid

Interesting to hear how Andy's daily routines and habits work in getting him laid. I'm hopeful that at some point in the future I will get to a stage of abundance once I have self-improved enough. I understand that it will likely take a good few years before I get to 'elite' level if I can get there, but I'm willing to have a good go at it

- Listened to Episode #97 of Andy's Podcast - Day 97: How Do I Be More Outcome-Independent?

I've done this in the past and still do to some degree and in some aspects of my life. I'm happy to say this is something that I have gotten much better at though, particularly with talking to girls. If things don't work out with a Tinder match, I just brush it off and move on. Having an abundance mindset has definitely helped me out here. I no longer beat myself up if things don't work out and accept it as 'it is what it is'.

- I have started reading The Slight Edge. Finished Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender yesterday. Brilliant book. I've now started working on this one on Andy's recommendation. I'm already really enjoying it and I think I'll find it very useful. Andy posted on my log a little while back with a link to an article to use whilst reading the book which I am putting to good use now I have started work on it

- I have written a shopping list for my new healthy bulking diet. This consists of 4 meals which total 2,700 Calories. The ingredients are fresh and nutritious. It's also quite cheap if I shop at a budget supermarket. Going to McDonalds to bulk is unhealthy as well as expensive

The meals are as follows:

1. Breakfast protein smoothie
2. Egg Stir Fry
3. Chicken Fajita Bowl
4. Ground Turkey and Sweet Potato

I am looking at adding 1 or 2 more snacks to get up to the nice round number of 3,000 Calories as well (Possibly nuts and fruit). It's about time I started eating properly as I'm almost into my 30's and it's gonna screw me over if I don't take action on this. I've got the food prep containers on the way from Igluu and when these arrive, I'll get on this. Should help fuel my gym and Jiu-Jitsu workouts too. If I combine this with getting enough sleep and cutting out the crap food, I reckon I'll really see improvements in my health and fitness

- I've been inspired by my Podcast last night, so I've arranged a date with a local girl on Tinder. She's okay looking. Haven't been on a date in a long time, so could do with getting back in the game. She seems nice so I'll see how it goes. Been using the Tinder Guide template and it's really working. No harm in having a coffee date for an hour when the coffee shop is a 15 minute walk away ️

That's it for today's update

Photos have been posted for accountability purposes

Thanks for reading

Spider 🕷

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Hey Man, I don't think I've commented on your log before but I'm glad you were able to talk to Andy and that it was helpful for you. I train BJJ too. How long have you been training?

Adam

Hey thanks a lot!

I trained for 6 months pre-pandemic and I’ve just started getting back into it. Signed up for a foundation course starting on the 5th and cannot wait!

You been training long dude?

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Spider Jerusalem is famous now, boys!

We talked about the girl who said she regretted sex, his fears around getting a girl pregnant (even when wearing a condom), and why I (Andy) don't drive.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jj6BVy2FgQ4

KillYourInnerLoser

Holy Shit loving the background art!!!

Thank you for this Andy!

I will watch this after work tonight and re-go over to make notes

Good to sit down with you and talk things over

Thanks again!

Spider

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 79: 29/12/2021

Podcasts

Hit Podcasts today - nice milestone and I’ve learnt a lot

Also got today over with - it’s my last shift in my shit job tomorrow, so I’ll be happy once that’s over. Got a couple days off which will give me chance to get things in order for my new job in the New Year and plan my self-improvement around it e.g. The Gym etc.

- Woke up at 07:00 Hrs - This is still quite early. Will get my sleep on track come 2022

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station ️

- Looked into my mirror and repeated 'I Like You' 5 times this morning (2/7). Still working up to saying 'I Love You' to myself. This is a lot harder than I thought. I will keep at it though

- Carried on writing my list of things I like about myself out. I've got just over halfway with this now. I'll keep going and I'll try to have a list of 50 by the end of the week. Surprised I came up with this many - I struggled getting to 5!

- I've now hit 100 of Andy's Podcasts - mostly because there are a few 10-20 minute ones which I just listen to back-to-back. This is a real milestone and I'm really learning a lot. I write a little about what I've learned from each podcast. on my log so I can come back and reflect

- Listened to Episode #98 of Andy's Podcast - Day 98: Can you Have Sex with Girls who Say “Looking for a relationship” in their Tinder Bio?

Really liked this one as I think it's a very modern dilemma. From my experience it depends how you approach. Approach like a Fuckboy, a Perv or a desperate SIMP, you get shot down in flames. Approach like a guy who's easy either way whether the girl hangs with you or not and if you show that you're honest and are a cool guy with a decent personality, I think the girl warms up to the idea more. I've got laid when this has been the case because the girl and I have had that back and forth chemistry and got on really well.

- Listened to Episode #99 of Andy's Podcast - Day 99: “Is it necessary to Develop an Attractive Lifestyle if I want to be Successful at Having Sex with Women?”

I fell into the trap of 'I need to get everything perfect before I start dating so girls will want to sleep with me...' and was talked out of it thankfully. I got laid twice since just having getting laid as a sub goal and putting a bit of effort into it. It's obviously easier if you develop that attractive lifestyle, but you can still get laid if you put the effort into that.

- Listened to Episode #100 of Andy's Podcast - Day 100: “I’m Worried About Being Thought of as a Slut” (Female Listener).

It was good to hear a female perspective on this. I've dated Eastern-European girls myself and I have noticed this cultural difference. I liked the reassurance aspect in this for if I encounter this in the future - just reassure the girl and tell her it's gonna be okay.

- Listened to Episode #101 of Andy's Podcast - Day 101: "I'm Worried About Erectile Dysfunction..."

I myself have had my struggles with this. I quit drinking about 5 years ago which helped. I also got into No-Fap and have ditched porn. All these things have definitely helped. I also use Viagra recreationally now as a backup. I've also done it where I've just focused on the foreplay and this has taken the pressure of the 'need to have sex'. Good to hear I'm not alone in my struggles with this.

- Listened to Episode #102 of Andy's Podcast - Day 102: Do You Need to Touch Girls on a Date?

I've heard many pickup artists say and read articles where they religiously preach 'Kino game! escalate bro!'. I now adopt this approach of 'if it feels right, do it'. Depends on the situation and depends on the girl. I don't put myself under that pressure anymore and it makes me more chilled on the actual date as the pressure is off. I think there's pressure on the girl as well which is something I haven't considered before

- Worked 9-5 Tomorrow is my last day in this job. I kept things civil and they said I worked really hard and would be welcomed back anytime. I work hard and I think they know that, but still they acted very cliquey and like mean schoolgirls on occasion in the office, so it's their loss in my opinion. It's the politics I can't be doing with as well as the rumours and blatant sexism towards men. At least the job I'm going into there are more men and it's familiar to me so I can navigate it better. Oh well. It is what it is.

- Have been swiping on Tinder and using boosts of an evening ️ I'm getting matches, but sadly everybody is miles away. Gonna hold off on using the boosts for a little while and give chance for girls who are more local to join. Hinge is working out okay - few numbers, but a few entitlement princesses giving me attitude as well. They got binned off straight away. I was hoping to get Lay 3 in the bag before 2022 ended, but I'm not too downhearted if it doesn't work out. Still in that festive period where girls are away with families etc. and can't meet and there's nothing I can do about that except keep trying which I'm already doing

- Read some more of The Slight Edge . Really enjoying this. I think I’m gonna learn a lot from it and it’s a good transition from the last book now I’ve gotten my head straight

And that’s it for today’s update

Photos have been posted for accountability purposes

Thanks for Reading

Spider 🕷

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 80: 30/12/2021

Around the forums in 80 Days Spider ditches his boring ass job and arranges 2 dates ️

Happy New Year's Eve 'Eve' everybody

I'm trying to treat the days leading up to the New Year as a time of self-reflection. I will be doing a follow up post likely tomorrow where I will reflect on my Self-Improvement journey. This is very appropriate considering it is my last day in my boring ass job today and I will be starting my new role in the New Year from the 4th of January onwards. I'm looking forward to starting my new job although I am also somewhat apprehensive. It is a management role and for more money, but also more responsibility. It's an interim position for 9 months, and I may then get taken on permanently. I am hopeful that this will springboard me into better careers in the future if I do not get taken on permanently, as management experience is very valuable on a C.V

I'm glad to be leaving my old job (as well as the Karens) behind. Sat there doing computer input wasn't exactly what I dreamed of as my ideal job when I was in high school. I also can't be doing with the passive-aggressive office politics and blatant sexism towards men that goes on in the office. I'll get a full week's pay out of it at least, so that's something. Straight into my savings account

I've also arranged another date for Sunday night. Going to meet a girl in a bar by my place. She's coming to me. Learned from my past mistakes which I discussed on the Podcast I did with Andy recently - I basically got stood up at a train station after travelling for 2 hours by some crazy bitch. I also avoid crazy bitches now because of that and I will not travel for longer than 30 minutes. If possible, I get the girls to come to me. I have also made a backup plan for tomorrow's date in case she flakes or stands me up (Need to get some protein powder and there's a supplement shop in town). The bar I'm meeting the girl at Sunday is like a 5 minute walk from my house, although I won't be telling her that! I'll see how it plays out. Also got 1 or 2 prospects lined up for next weekend potentially. I'll update on here if anything of note happens 🖊

Today's Update

- Woke up at 08:00 Hrs today. My sleep pattern is a little screwed, but I'll get it back on track as we go into the New Year for my new job

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station ️

- Told myself 'I Like You' in the mirror (3/7). This was a little easier today. I may try to step it up tomorrow and tell the mirror 'I Love You'. I'll see how I feel

- Added a few more things to the list of 50 good things about myself. I'm at 30 so far and I'm running out of ideas, but I'll keep going. It's hard complimenting yourself!

- Listened to Andy's Podcast - Day 103: How Long Should You Have a Date for?

I liked this one. Some good advice here as I can remember when I first started dating and I'd literally hang around with a girl for hours on end. I had a 5 hour date once and it didn't get me laid. Turned her off if anything. I now keep my dates to about an hour now I'm a fairly experienced dater or an hour and a half max

- Listened to Andy's Podcast Episode #104 - Day 104: Imogen's Getting Laid/Self-Improvement Journey [Part 1]

and

- Listened to Andy's Podcast Episode #105 - Day 105: Imogen's Getting Laid/Self-Improvement Journey [Part 2]

As someone who wants to leave girls better than I found them as well as wanting to mentor and coach girls who are younger (late teens/early 20's) this was really useful. Good to hear how Andy has helped Imogen along in her journey. I think if I was to settle down with somebody, it would be someone who wants to actually self-improve. The girls who don't care, are overweight, drink, smoke, live on their phones and in the world of reality T.V etc. are my idea of hell. I wouldn't even date these girls now

- Went for a 20 minute walk on my lunch break. Wanted to clear my head. Felt better

- Updated my schedule to accommodate for my New Job. I've allocated time for The Gym, Reading, Podcasts, Meal Prep and Jiu-Jitsu around working my new job. If I plan my days out, I can hit all of my self-improvement goals 🗓

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- Read some more of The Slight Edge. Finding this very useful. Will carry the techniques in this book into 2022

- Worked 9-5

Last Day in this job. Glad to see the back of it!

That's it for today's update

Photos have been posted below for accountability purposes

Thanks for Reading

Spider 🕷

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 81: 31/12/2021

New Year's Eve: Seeing the World for what it is Coffee Date success/Lay 3 arranged

The Importance of 2021 🗓

This year was particularly important to me due to it being the year I got serious about my Self-Improvement despite being surrounded by a totalitarian dictatorship of a Government and the constant COVID Fearmongering from the willing masses

I've kind of dabbled in the idea of Self-Improvement in the past, but never really took it seriously. Here I am though having completed 81 days of a 365 Day Project . I've achieved quite a lot in such a short time - landing 2 new full-time jobs, getting into a management position, sorting my finances, getting 2 new lays, doing a podcast with Andy and confronting my insecurities to name a few. I hope to carry this on into 2022 and beyond, stepping things up greatly. Although I refuse to be associated with the 'New Year New Me' Crowd

Going into the New Year, I'm going to try to be less anxious and stressed about things. I'm also going to try and really hit the self-improvement, but as a bare minimum, just continue with the consistency. Bit like The Slight Edge book I'm currently reading. Can't just read it though, you have to Live it and ingrain it within your lifestyle which I am trying to actively do going forward

Seeing the World for what it is

I've also noticed that I've got a different perspective/outlook on things now I have come along in my self-improvement journey 🏞

I walk past a McDonald's almost every day on my way up to town or to the shop by me. I see people lining up in the drive-thru at or packed out in the seating area inside like cattle. This might make me sound like an asshole, but I'm starting to view these people as 'sheep' lining up to slowly kill themselves with fast food. They que up because they have no self-control and they see a McDonald's advert on television and they blindly obey

I see people who watch Netflix/Reality T.V religiously as individuals who are being distracted and are chained up. Kept as slaves to their own dopamine receptors. Same goes for those who play video games constantly. Just being willingly distracted from the hardships of life instead of taking ownership and fighting them

The Government play into this with wanton and Draconian Lockdown policies ⛓

You can't go out for a walk or to the gym or we'll fine you, but you can go to the McDonald's drive-thru and sit at home watching shit T.V and lining Bezo's pockets with Amazon Orders. Whilst you're at it, take this untested vaccine or we'll make your life miserable and unbearable and the rest of the public will do our dirty work for us when they publicly shame you on social media for 'killing granny'

Pornography, Video Games, Politics, Antidepressants, T.V, Fast Food, Junk Food, Social Media, The News, The Media, Mindless Consumerism.

Distractions.

This is mirrored by the Normie opinions that I hear from the people who adopt these bad habits. I recently mentioned on a previous post I've been criticised for not drinking, reading, getting up early, listening to podcasts, going on a podcast, reading Manga, not being on social media, not eating fast food, not going to nightclubs, going on long walks, not subscribing to Apple Music or Spotify and owning an old-school MP3 player

It's a crab in the bucket mentality. Instead of being seen as someone getting shit done, I'm seen as someone to be pulled down to their level who needs to be put back into check as I'm breaking free of the Normie programming

I know this sounds a bit dramatic and like I'm Tyler Durden fighting my way out of The Matrix, or that I'm waking up like the guy in 'They Live', but using these as analogies are helping propel me forward in my self-improvement journey and to see the world for what it truly is

I don't want to be a part of that society and I am hopeful that I can find likeminded individuals who don't buy into the bullshit and established norms, much like the guys on the forums

I felt this was appropriate to get my thoughts down ‘on paper’ as we go into 2022. This has been on my mind for a while now and for my own sanity and clarification, needed to be put into something tangible

Today's Update

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station ️

View attachment 1

- Told myself 'I Like You' in the mirror 5 times (4/7). Lot easier today. I'm going to try and tell myself 'I Love You' Tomorrow as this has gotten much easier up to this point

- Listened to Episode #106 of Andy's Podcast - Day 106: Try Not Having Sex, and Focus on ONLY Foreplay

I like the sound of this. As someone who has had struggles with ED, I think this would take a lot of the pressure off and make things more relaxed. I've always done Foreplay, but I always imagine a clock ticking and the thought that runs through my head is 'She's going to want me to Fuck her very soon...' and that puts me under pressure. If I just take the sex away, then the pressure isn't there. It totally removes it from the equation. I've got a Doxy Magic Wand as well as a few other toys, which I could use instead of just going through the motions until we have sex. I like the idea of using music. Got a few Lo-Fi beats playlists I might use for this

- Listened to Episode #107 of Andy's Podcast - Day 107: My Top 5 Most Helpful Purchases

I've bought quite a few things that Andy recommends - Various Books, Viagra, Doxy Magic Wand, Sunrise Alarm etc. I've never been disappointed with what I've bought. I'll definitely look into buying some of these recommendations, particularly the orange light-blocking glasses and some new noise-cancelling headphones. I fancied getting some wireless beats for the Gym, but I think you're really paying for Dr. Dre's brand name. I've had 2 wireless Beats earphones and both broke, so I won't be buying Beats again. Might get some Sony ones that Andy recommends once I get my first pay check. They aren't cheap here, so I'll shop around if I decide to pick up a pair. Went into my local electronics shop on the way home from coffee and priced up a pair - 250 Bucks. Gonna need to think on this a spell

View attachment 3

- Listened to Episode #108 of Andy's Podcast - Day 108: There are 2 Levels of Attraction (Attraction vs Lust)

This made sense to me. Once I improved my Tinder photos to a good standard, things have definitely improved for me. My first round of photos were a complete dumpster fire and now with boosts, I can get 5-10 matches a night. I agree with the fact that pickup artists put an emphasis on 'meeting women'. Lol. We want to sleep with them. Getting lusted over by women is definitely something I want. I think at that point I will know that I have made it

- Went on a Coffee Date today and arranged a Lay ️

Was with the girl for an hour and it served a good purpose - my first date after the last girl who I had a bad experience with. I've been putting off going on a date for about a month now and honestly, I didn't wanna go today, but I just thought 'Fuck It'. I needed to get this done and told my brain 'Shut up. We're doing this.' If I didn't do this now, I probably wouldn't date for a long long time. Told the girl via text that I'm taking care of business, but can have just an hour with her. Met her for a coffee and she's nice. A little chubby, but I reckon she'd be fun to spend the night with. Told her I'm only looking for casual which she's cool with as she's just come out of a relationship. She text me when she got home stating that she wants to see me again. I basically told her I wanna come round and spend the night with her which she's agreed to. I've learnt from my past mistakes and I'm not playing the boyfriend when I just want casual. Lay 3 might be on the horizon if she don't flake or ghost on me. See how it plays out. I reckon she'd be into BDSM and she mentioned she likes being spanked on the date. Walked her to her car afterwards. She's got purple hair, so might call her Purple Princess if this becomes a regular thing. Arranged a lay with her for Tuesday nightso I'll keep things updated on here. I won't be staying overnight, but be good to have some fun with her for a couple hours



- Also did my 'date backup plan'. I told myself if my date doesn't show up, no problem, I'll grab coffee by myself and go protein powder shopping for my new diet plan. If she does show up, I'll just go buy it after. Went and bought this after the date, so it worked out okay in the end. Telling girls 'I can only do an hour as I gotta take care of shit' really works wonders and doesn't keep me Simping round them for hours. Makes them think my time is valuable too. Picked up this protein powder in town. Hopefully it goes well with the milkshakes I'll be mixing up

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- Took Delivery of my Meal Prep Containers for my new bulking diet. These will definitely help. They came in packs of 10, so I got spares in case I drop one because I'm a clumsy dumbass or it cracks in the dishwasher or something. Got 2 compartment and single compartment ones and both should come in handy

View attachment 2

- Read some more of The Slight Edge

This chapter was on why people fail at self-improvement: They don't do it consistently. It's the little changes that produce the big results and this makes sense. I've definitely seen an improvement with implementing little changes over the past 81 Days. Doing my 365-Day Project is definitely in line with this philosophy. Getting some good principles from this which I'll carry forward into 2022

View attachment 6

- Did some more work on the '50 things I like about myself'. Got 45 things now. 5 more to go. I cheated a little and googled good character traits and then had an honest discussion with myself about which ones fit. Was able to write down 7 or 8 from this. Got 5 left which I'm going to ask people I know to assist with

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That's it for Today's Update. Last one of 2021. Here's hoping I can carry this on into 2022 ⏭

Photos posted for accountability purposes

Good Luck everyone - wish you all the best for 2022 and I'll see ya'll in the New Year!

Thanks for Reading

Spider Jerusalem 🕷

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 82: 01/01/2022

2022

Happy New Year Everyone

First Day of 2022. I've tried to start it right by carrying on and keeping up with the good habits I started 82 Days ago. I'm so glad I started sooner than I did and not 'I'll start on the 1st of January 2022...'. I was serious about starting, so I did it back then and didn't wait. I doubt the people who are the 'New Year New Me' crowd will actually keep at their resolutions anyway. It's why I never make any

Took a little break today but still got a few things done

- Woke up late. Couldn't sleep as there were idiots going crazy in my street at like 3 A.M to bring in the New Year. Will fix my sleep pattern after tomorrow night (date night).

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station. So far I've been sticking to my new '1 coffee a day' rule ️

- Told myself 'I Love You' 5 times in the mirror this morning (5/7). Finally worked up the balls to commit and say it. Felt a little weird and awkward, but I got it done

- Completed my list of '50 Things I Like About Myself'. Finally got there. I'm going to keep this close to hand and whenever I feel inadequate or that I hate myself, I will re-read this list to encourage myself. Not sure if it will do any good, but I am willing to try

- Listened to Episode #109 of Andy's Podcast - Day 109: How to Make An Honest Woman

If you'd have asked me 6 months ago, I'd have simply said 'Impossible. You Can't'. I guess the answer is to lead by example and positively encourage. I see the point to the way girls are leading to encouraging white lies e.g. not wanting to upset other girl's feelings and fear of being alienated. I've had girls lie about being on the pill, not seeing other guys etc. so I'm a bit pessimistic with this one. I think that men are wired differently to be honest which causes a few issues here. Guys are also encouraged to be honest as they are seriously reprimanded for lying - 'You are only worth as much as your word' is something I have lived by. Girls seem to get away with this for some reason. I think having an honest conversation with the girl you're seeing is the answer and actively coaching her to be honest e.g. 'it's not a big deal I'd rather you'd be honest'.

- Listened to Episode #110 of Andy's Podcast - Day 110: Pussy is Overrated, Let's Go Get Some Dick

Went for a walk, so put this on. Kind of understand the female perspective a lot more now when it comes to Tinder and Online Dating. I do see now how this can make girls victims of their own successes - being spoilt for choice can be difficult.

- Cleaned and tidied my room. Got the day off today, so took the opportunity to get this done. Just needed a quick polish and vacuum so this didn't take long

- I've only drank water today in addition to the 1 coffee this morning. I'm trying to get myself to a point where I feel and look better through my diet. Cutting out the fizzy drinks will definitely help me here. Probably save money in the long run too instead of buying cans of Coke all the time. A small step, but one I'm trying to stick to. Key here will be to carry a refillable bottle wherever I go

- Diet. I've eaten good quality food today. No Chocolate, no Crisps, no sweets etc. I've had steak, fruit, vegetables, yoghurt, bran flake cereal, vegetable soup, wholemeal bread etc. I'm not going to eat strictly healthy rabbit food 100% of the time, but I am trying to cut out the crap and see if I feel better. Had a piece of cake at the end of the day to reward myself, but having a chocolate bar and a packet of crisps up until dinner time isn't going to cut it anymore. No wonder I don't feel great most days

- Read some more of The Slight Edge. Picking up some very good ideas from this particularly around consistency. I'm enjoying this book a lot

That's it for today's update

Photos have been posted for accountability purposes

Thanks for Reading

Spider 🕷

 

[Aspire2Greatness]

Haven't really been reading your log prior to listening through the entirety of your interview with Andy, but here we are. Would like to say that your consistent and detailed logs are very, very inspirational. What stuck with me from the interview was how important it is to keep at the logs, even though there might not be a whole lot going on in terms of personal progression on each given day (does that makes sense?).
Thanks for sharing the things you did, will be following your progression going forward.

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Haven't really been reading your log prior to listening through the entirety of your interview with Andy, but here we are. Would like to say that your consistent and detailed logs are very, very inspirational. What stuck with me from the interview was how important it is to keep at the logs, even though there might not be a whole lot going on in terms of personal progression on each given day (does that makes sense?).
Thanks for sharing the things you did, will be following your progression going forward.

Hard2Focus

Thank you brother - that really means a lot to me. Been checking your log every now and again and it’s good to see you being honest with yourself about your sex life, drugs, ADHD etc. it’s been an interesting read especially seeing how things are over in Norway for you

With the honesty aspect, it’s something I’ve been actively trying to do - if I can’t be honest with myself, then who can I be honest with? I’ve now started trying to be honest with others also, particularly the guys on the forums and I feel like I opened up on my interview about my experiences as a cop and what happened with that girl

Definitely makes sense consistently posting as I’m finding the consistency is really working out for me - I have the odd bad day where I don’t write much e.g. was at a friend’s funeral one day and another I had a Gum/Wisdom Tooth Infection (The week from hell!).

I did think ‘What’s the point this is a bad post?’ On some occasions, but after reading The Slight Edge, it’s made me realise that even if on some days I only do a little, in the long run it pays off and it’s worth posting about even if just a few lines

Thanks for checking out my podcast with Andy - I was worried I’d be boring everybody to death! I’m really glad to hear you got something out of it.

Thanks again man

Regards,

Spider 🕷

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 83: 02/02/2022

Date Night A girl returns to Spider 🕸 Blue Light blocking glasses

Posting this a little earlier than I usually do as I'm going on a date later tonight and you never know! I think this optimism thing is kinda working out for me, but we shall see

Got a couple of things going on and some new developments on the dating front. Glad to get my thoughts down on here for clarity. I'm at the stage with these things where the decisions I make could mean I reap the rewards this week or Fuck things up colossally. Be interesting from a self-development and dating standpoint to see how things go. If nothing else, I think it will be a worthwhile experience. On top of that, I'm starting my new management job too

No pressure, Spider!

Date Night

Got a date tonight with a girl which I've arranged during the week. I'm keeping my expectations low, but we'll see what happens. I'll update tomorrow with anything of note

A girl returns to Spider 🕸

A girl I spoke to on Bumble a while ago matched me on Hinge. She liked my photo. I didn't like hers.

I have spoken about this girl previously on my log: This girl wanted me to buy her dinner etc. and got a bit bitchy when I refused and told her I'm not looking for anything serious. I was very blunt and sharp with her and explained that her behaviour last time was unacceptable. I made sure not to reply too quick also. She wants to meet me next weekend and try the 'nothing serious' thing with me. I've told her I won't be buying her dinner and she wants to meet for a drink. I've flatly told her if we meet, she'll be buying her own drinks. She was cool with that. I've told her I'll let her know. She can sit and stew for a couple of days waiting for me to decide after her attitude last time. I've told her I'm not going to be chasing her. She wants my respect, time and company, she can work for it.

There's a couple of other prospects who I might meet Saturday instead. If these don't play out, I'll go see her. Fuck it. It's an hour or two of my time and she is decent looking. I'll keep my expectations low and see if a better offer from the other plates I'm currently spinning comes along. If not, be worth it for the experience. I'm no longer tolerating bad behaviour from women. My time and respect has to be earned.

Blue Light Blocking Glasses

I have bought some orange tinted blue-light blocking glasses. These are due to arrive tomorrow and will be my last purchase from Amazon before my prime membership runs out. Shops and eBay sellers are all shut around here for New Year's Bank Holiday, so I've had to get them from there. I read Andy's article and did my own research around these and felt this was worth the 12 bucks to give them a try. I'll start putting them on a couple hours before bed when they arrive and see. I need to fix my sleep pattern and I've got a couple days to do it. Hoping these glasses will give me a 'Slight Edge'. I'll post on here how I get on with them

Today's Update

- Woke up late again today. I'll be fixing my sleep pattern after date night tonight. Going to be starting work early this week, so I'll get on this

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station ️

- Told myself 'I Love You' in the mirror 5 times again (6/7). This has definitely gotten easier. Not 100% comfortable still and I doubt I ever will be, but I think it'll work out long-term. One more to go tomorrow then that'll be a full week

- Listened to Episode #111 of Andy's Podcast - Day 111: How to Find Dominant Women

Trying things with a dominant woman has been something on my bucket list for a little while - just to see the other side of things. I'm kind of embarrassed to publicly admit that, but oh well who gives a Fuck, I'm trying to be honest. Society might have a stigma around men not being dominant, but Fuck society. Why should I let societal attitudes stop me from getting what I want sexually? Totally agree that dominant girls are very hard to find. The ones I have spoken to on dating sites have been Bipolar psychopaths and their Tinder profiles are like red flag central. Making a girl dominant by coaching and teaching her makes more sense. Least you can also probably establish that she's stable/sane. I'm at the stage now where I don't want to have a 'fixer-upper' as a sexual partner as it just brings Fucking drama and nightmares. I'm gonna screen harder and make sure the girls I see now have their shit together

- Listened to Episode #112 of Andy's Podcast - Day 112: The Time a Crazy Japanese Mistress Tried to Use My Cum for Evil

Fuck. Just from the title I could tell this was going to be some insane ass shit! I definitely learned a lot from this story. After my bad experiences with dating, I'm now more aware than ever when it comes to red flags and identifying them. If a girl is overly sexual now, she's either horny in the moment, Fucking with you and is a timewaster, or she is just Fucking batshit insane. I'll be avoiding and noping outta there if I see any of this shit in the future that's for damn sure!

- Read some more of The Slight Edge. Today's chapter was on time. Made a lot of sense as we live in the world of expediency where everybody wants everything yesterday and won't make time work for them. Amazon Prime, instant movies, Uber Eats, online dating. Everybody wants everything now but won't accept that things take the time and they get frustrated ASAP and give up when they don't see these immediate results. I myself have been a victim of this mindset particularly with the Gym and dating etc. I'll be knocking this mindset on the head going forward. I think this'll definitely help me long-term

That's it for today's update

I'mma head out on this date and go see this chick. Wish me luck, fellas

Photos have been posted for accountability purposes

Thanks for reading

Spider 🕷

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 84: 03/12/2021

️ LAY 3 ️ Starting 2022 off with a bang Spider Fucks a girl within 10 minutes of meeting


So, I Fucked a girl last night within 10 minutes of meeting her

Met her at a bar by me and we had a drink (I had Diet Coke as I don't drink). Turns out this girl has recently gone through a breakup after a 4 and a half year relationship and now just wants to have some fun

So, after about 10 minutes, she wanted to get out of there with me. Finished our drinks, and off we went

Across the road from the bar is a hotel. It's just after Christmas, so the rates were very cheap. We booked a room for the night - 20 bucks each it worked out as, but I paid as she travelled over to me - I felt that was a fair deal and I liked this girl's attitude. She put actual the effort in to come and see me

As soon as we got in, that's when the fun started. I'm guessing she just wanted to have the drink with me to check me out and make sure I was an okay guy before we took things to a physical level. I can totally understand that especially as what has been going on in the news lately: Been a few high profile cases here of kidnap and murder etc. So I'm all for a date or 2 before intimacy so the girl is comfortable. Plus, I get to check them out and make sure they aren't crazy! Luckily, this place is quite close to my house (although I didn't tell her that) so if shit hit the fan, woulda been a 15 minute walk and I'd have been home. Making contingency plans is something I am going to get into the regular habit of now in case things go sideways. I did this recently where I met Purple Haze for coffee - my backup plan was to have coffee by myself and go protein powder shopping if she stood me up

She was 5'1 and tiny. I towered over her. Made for some very interesting positions we got into - picking her up and throwing her around (she said she liked it rough), legs on shoulders etc. She was quite kinky. Loved it when I spanked her, bit her ass, wanted me to leave marks. I even choked her, put her over my lap and made her call me 'Daddy'. Fucked her about 6 times in total. Chilled in bed with her, gave her one again this morning and then I came home

Shoutout to Dewm as I saw my phone go with a message from him as I had this girl head down, ass up and I was balls deep in her doggy style: He text me to congratulate me on my recent Podcast with Andy! Paha!

For my own peace of mind, I would like to state now that I was careful and used a condom every time. Checked each one after for splits/breakages too. All good.

She's really into Disney, so I'll call her Disney Princess as well as for the purposes of protecting her identity. Gotta be like a million girls out there who are still into Disney in case I end up seeing her again and need to refer back to her

On a side note, I added this girl to my Instagram before meeting her where I've got posts on there for social proof purposes

As well as so girls can see I'm not some 45 year-old, fat, bald dude called 'Hector'. Fucking Lol

Not sure if I'll see her again as I think she just wanted a one-night thing. She seems to want to try different guys from the impression I got from her. Totally cool with me as I'm up for whatever and just getting the experiences at this stage. She lives a little far, so something regular would probably be difficult with this girl

Talk about starting off 2022 with a bang!

Today's Update

- Told myself 'I Love You' in the mirror 5 times this morning (7/7). That's 7/7 now and today was the easiest yet. This is definitely something I am going to consider doing long-term. Maybe every night before bed even if it's just 1 line of 'You are good enough'.

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station this morning ️

- Text my Jiu-Jitsu instructor to confirm the time the beginner course starts Wednesday (7 P.M). Looking forward to getting back into this. I was a little apprehensive with COVID and passing it on, but I've been stuck in for 2 years. I have to find my line in the sand where I say 'Fuck this'. I'm going to be travelling to work and around other people anyway, so Fuck it. If you're gonna get it, you're gonna get it

- I've set my alarm for 04:20 tomorrow. Need to fix my sleep pattern as it got a bit all over the place over Christmas. I haven't got work tomorrow, I start Wednesday. I just have to go in and pick my work laptop up at some point tomorrow, so I'm going to take the opportunity to get my sleep pattern back on track and my schedule sorted if I can. Got the blue-light blocking glasses coming tomorrow, so this'll probably help from doing my own research

- Listened to Episode #113 of Andy's Podcast - Day 113: 12 Facts About Andy You’ve Never Heard

Interesting to find out more about Andy. I know we discussed why Andy doesn't drive on my recent podcast I did with him. I'm a nervous driver myself - had a car crash (got hit by a truck) whilst I was learning. Saw a lot of bad crashes when I was a cop as well, so this has stuck with me. I also used to be big into videogames. I play Cyberpunk 2077 every now and again myself, but not massively. Tried to cut down the video games since starting my self-improvement journey. I play every now and again as a 'Reward' once I've got my other self-improvement stuff done, but this is maybe once or twice a week for an hour or so at a time.

- Listened to Episode #114 of Andy's Podcast - Day 114: Day 114: My Audience’s Most Helpful Purchases

Good to get some input from the guys on the forums. I'm about to embark on a batch cooking journey myself having recently bought some meal prep containers. A slow cooker is something I have and may use going forward. Decorations made sense too. When I get my own place I will be kitting it out with mood lighting etc. Can see how this will help set the mood and make girls more comfortable when bringing them back. I'm currently working through The Slight Edge and I have read No More Mr. Nice Guy, The Rational Male and You Can't Afford The Luxury of a Negative Thought.I have worked with PT's in the past and did find it beneficial. I had to stop due to losing my job, but I'll consider this for the future when I have some money as I think I need to go all in and show that I'm serious. Totally agree with boycotting China. I'm boycotting Amazon myself and may also boycott China as much as I can. Human rights abuses and they profited heavily from COVID. Need to bring business back to the U.S.A and the U.K instead of outsourcing it to them. Probably buy some nice sheets when I get my own place too.

- Listened to Episode #115 of Andy's Podcast - Day 115: Why I DON'T Recommend Open Relationships to Newbies

This one's a minefield and won't be something I'll consider for a very very long time - if at all. I don't really want any kind of relationship being honest - not at the minute anyway. It would be selfish and irresponsible to pretend you know what you're doing. Especially when another person's feelings are involved. The guy who pushed his girl into sleeping with other people as well. Sorry, but that guy's a dick for putting a girl through that. I'd almost say it was emotionally abusive of him. I've already been wracked with guilt from a bad experience with a girl and I don't want that feeling ever again Solid advice on this one.

- Read some more of The Slight Edge . Currently on chapter 4: You Have to Start with a Penny. Good advice here as regards valuing what you start with and not writing it off as insignificant. I have a few good things to start with which I will carry forward

That's it for today's update

Photos have been attached for accountability purposes

Thanks for Reading

Spider 🕷

 

[SpongeBob]

Congrats on the lay!

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Congrats on the lay!

Thank you my man!

Regards,

Spider

 

[Radical]

Congrats dude

Also just listened to your pod. Thats some thick midlands accent right there mate haha

Good chat, very interesting to hear your background before getting here

 

[Holden]

Sounds like a fun time. You deserve the success bro

 

[Dewm]

Shoutout to @Dewm as I saw my phone go with a message from him as I had this girl head down, ass up and I was balls deep in her doggy style: He text me to congratulate me on my recent Podcast with Andy! Paha!

Glad the timing was just perfect. Congrats on fucking!

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 85: 04/01/2021

Spider gets ghosted: Purple Haze disappears in a haze

Title of this one is Purple Haze, although it should be Orange Haze really, as I am wearing my new blue-light blocking glasses as I type this out! Makes everything look apocalyptic, but pretty

Anyway, Purple Haze - the chick who I met for coffee New Year's Eve and arranged to head round her place tonight as she has a free house, has ghosted on me. I sent a confirmation text this morning, and... I heard nothing back

Lol.

You win some you lose some. Interesting to see if she gets back in touch and what she says, but I won't be chasing her. Ball's in her court. Luckily I'm spinning a couple of other plates at the minute, so I'll see what happens with those

Today's Update

- Got out of bed at 06:00. Better than the past week or so, so I'm counting this as progress. I'll try get up at 05:00 tomorrow. Luckily I'm working from home the next few days so I've got chance to get my sleep pattern sorted and back to normal

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station. Got through a couple of the shorter podcast Episodes Andy did whilst sipping my coffee and chilling out ️

- Did some back exercises this morning. I struggle with back pain and have done for many years due to a spinal issue. After reading The Slight Edge, I have realised that if I do 5-10 minutes of stretching/exercises a day, I will likely see good results long-term if I keep this up consistently. I also did 1 push up and 1 sit-up. Not much, but something to build on: 'You have to start with a penny...'.

- Listened to Episode #116 of Andy's Podcast - Day 116: Stop Being Scared of Getting Banned on Tinder

I've had experiences with this and been banned myself - absolutely no idea why. Tinder shadow-bans you and seems to be quite biased towards men on there from reading around some of the forums on the internet. I've recently got around this as well as the problem I was having with my Tinder profile where it kept crashing: I have a cheap burner phone and the local $1 store (£1 Land it's called here) sells sim cards with new numbers for 1 buck. Bought 2 of these before I got around the ban/crash issues. Just signed up with a separate number and problem solved. I'm now of the 'shit happens' attitude if I get banned - I can just get another number and go back on it.

- Listened to Episode #117 of Andy's Podcast - Day 117: 5 Mistakes Guys Make with Getting Laid

I'm guilty of most of these. I now spin plates and look at multiple opportunities with girls instead of having the one-itis. I also don't procrastinate as much as I used to around getting things done. I now also actually try to get laid - got Tinder Gold, Boosts, Hinge Premium etc. In the past I wouldn't have invested. I also used to text endlessly and never close the deal. As a dumb teenager I'd keep talking to girls even after they would say 'not interested'. It was either stupidity, arrogance or both as I thought 'I can make them like me'. I don't miss being a teenager that's for damn sure! I'm now more cautious with my time - if a girl's messing me about wasting time, I cut them off ASAP now. Learned a lot from Andy's past experiences too. I'm grateful to him for this.

- Listened to Episode #118 of Andy's Podcast - Day 118: It’s a Numbers Game, Not a Stats Game

Makes sense to me. The whole ratio thing seems to be autistic to me and reminds me of the 14 year-olds who play Call of Duty and obsess over their kill to death ratios. Too many factors in play to look at the whole ratio thing which is why I have always just done a lay count. I either get laid or I don't.

- Took delivery of the Blue-Light blocking glasses. I'll probably get some funny looks from my family, but who gives a Fuck. If they help my sleep then I'm all for it

- Cancelled my Berserk volume 9 order (and volume 10 pre-order) with Amazon. I have now bought Volume 9 from a small independent eBay seller. Fuck Bezos and his COVID-profiting. Will likely pre-order Volume 10 from an independent comic book shop. Pity there aren't really any physical stores in my small town. Comic book shops have kind of gone out of business. You ask me, when the comic books got political and tried to push agendas, that's when the sales went down and the stores started to shut. Recently, I read an article where the new Superman 'came out as bisexual'. Why they try and push this shit onto 8 year olds is degenerate. It's also the reason I don't read comic books anymore and I only read Manga. Get woke, go broke. Just a pity the comic book shops had to suffer as a result

- Read some more of The Slight Edge. Had to go into work to pick up my laptop - read this chapter on the bus and made use of the 'dead time'. I'm on chapter 5: The Quantum Leap Myth.

People are always looking for the shortcut and the hack, the 'Quantum Leap', but the key is to make a little progress every day consistently. Solid advice. Can't just sit around waiting for a miracle to happen. Hard work and the consistent application of it is what I am getting from this chapter and I am liking it. Jocko has a similar principle and it's all linking in and making sense

- Booked my car in for a retest of the annual check - 11 A.M on Saturday the 8th. Hopefully it passes now I've fixed the brakes and I can start driving to the gym in the morning. Need to start driving more even though I don't want to. Little steps to start. Another 30 bucks, but needs doing

- Hit up Purple Haze to see if she still wants to hang later. Still no reply. Lol. NEXT!

That's it for today's update

Photos attached for accountability purposes

Thanks for reading

Spider 🕷

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Congrats dude

Also just listened to your pod. Thats some thick midlands accent right there mate haha

Good chat, very interesting to hear your background before getting here

Radical

Hey thanks man! Yeah I'm a Brummie and spent a bit of time in Wolverhampton as a kid too, so I'm kinda Brummie/Yam Yam aha.

It was a really good experience which I was grateful for the opportunity to go on the Podcast - glad to hear you got something out of it!

Thanks again

Spider

 

[Spider Jerusalem]

Day 86: 05/01/2021

EPIC Fail: Jiu-Jitsu Panic Attack

Didn't have a good day today. Had a pretty epic fail which I'm quite pissed off with myself for.

Earlier today my parents spoke to me about this new COVID variant. Both are clinically vulnerable. My father recently had a heart attack and my Mom recovered from cancer a couple years ago. They told me to try not to take unnecessary risks as I could catch something and bring it into the house. Tonight, I went to Jiu Jitsu for my first session back.

It was very busy.

I had visions of my parents dying from COVID in a hospital ward, me being responsible and my brother never speaking to me again because of it.

So, I had a panic attack and ended up having to leave.

Started to feel it coming on and told the trainer I felt dizzy so I was gonna head home and come another night - he was cool. Managed to get out of the door and down the street before I started hyperventilating. Took me a good 10 minutes to calm myself down.

I witnessed my parents go through serious medical issues which had quite a traumatic effect on me which likely triggered this.

I signed up and paid for the beginner’s course before this Omnicron variant took off and it looked like things were calming down. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place at the minute. Don't know what to do. I'm gonna take a couple of days to think about this. I've already put my life on hold on for 2 years, but I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I gave them both COVID.

I think with any self-improvement, failure is inevitable. It's knocked me down a bit, but it's part of the process. I need to try and work around it now and figure a solution. Not Gonna Fucking Quit.

Despite this happening later on, my day was fairly productive:

- Woke up at 05:00 Hrs today. Good progress here considering I was getting up at 09:00 Hrs a week ago over the Christmas break. I feel like the glasses really helped - I didn't necessarily sleep longer, but I feel like I slept better if that makes sense. Hopefully I will be tired out from training and will be able to sleep a lot easier tonight. Will definitely put the glasses on again tonight

- Did my back exercises and stretches again this morning. 2 Day streak. Also did 2 push-ups and 2 Sit-ups. My 1 penny has now turned into 2. A 100% increase from yesterday. The Slight Edge at work. I may start doing these of a night as well to give me that extra edge

- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle Station ️

- Listened to Episode #119 of Andy's Podcast - Day 119: My Life Isn't Always Flashy

Appreciate the realness and honesty in this one. I'm now very sceptical of what I see online and realised long ago that the world is full of liars and truth-benders - a lot of them are on social media. I have read articles regarding social media and depression and the links are quite scary. I don't use Facebook (except for small businesses) and I rarely go on Instagram (Mostly used for checking whether girls are catfishes or not) for exactly this reason. I found my mental health taking a nosedive at a highly critical time in my life (my teens). I honestly think the world would be a lot better without Social Media as the disadvantages completely outweigh the benefits. Like daily life, Self-Improvement isn't always glamourous!

- Listened to Episode #120 of Andy's Podcast - Day 120: Radical & Andy on Simping

I've been guilty of this as a younger man thinking this would get me laid. How wrong I was! Think that this is largely due to societal programming and years of feminism. Always wondered why the guys who were arrogant A-Holes always got the girl whilst I'd always message back ASAP, offer to pay, bring flowers etc. My lowest point where I started to turn things around was when I was in my 20's and I ended up buying photos of a girl I liked thinking it would get me laid. This was my rock bottom. I started to climb out of the cave after this. No More Mr. Nice Guy would be ideal for guys who do this kind of behaviour.

- Listened to Episode #121 of Andy's Podcast - Day 121: Radical & Andy on Self-Awareness

Got a lot out of this one. I myself have had several panic attacks over the years and have honestly thought I was going to die. I've also been to counselling and done Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. This was a big help. I'm still struggling with my depression every now and again it comes back, but overall I've pretty much beaten it. I'm no longer at the stage where I won't leave the house. I still struggle with anxiety, but I have my coping strategies and mechanisms. Having a mindset change and how you frame things is probably key here. The one phrase I got out of this that stuck with me was 'The Normal Level of effort is not good enough'.

- Listened to Episode #122 of Andy's Podcast - Day 122: Andy & Imogen Don't Pressure a Virgin

Valuable advice here. I've seen guys pressure girls out of misguided Red Pill advice. Must have felt very horrible from a girl's point of view being pressured into sex. I now take a step back and chill. I think second date lays help take the pressure off.

- Read some more of The Slight Edge. Just a few pages as I've been getting headaches

- Wore my blue-light blocking glasses again when I got back from training as I had some time on my laptop and phone. I'm also using the 'night shift' mode feature on my phone and turning the brightness down on my laptop. I'm hopeful taking steps like these will help improve my sleep long-term

That's it for today's update

Bit of a downer but I’ll keep going with it

Photos have been attached for accountability purposes

Thanks for reading

Spider 🕷

 

[Crisis_Overcomer]

I've already put my life on hold on for 2 years, but I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I gave them both COVID.

For me, the most satanic thing our overlords did was persuading us that cowveed is a problem because of asymptomatic transmission. I'll suggest researching the topic yourself and making an educated decision about whether you have to worry being around asymptomatic people or not.