Spider Jerusalem
Member
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2021
Day 65: 15/12/2021
Self-reflection
Want to say a big thankyou to Brother_Tucker and Now who had the back and forth with me yesterday on this progress log. I took the opportunity to do some self-reflection after reading the responses last night and during my free time this morning. Slowly coming to a few realisations about what happened recently and I am taking the opportunity to learn from it
I was on a downer for a week or 2 after and this experience did really affect me, but with everyone's help, I'm getting there and working on getting back into the dating
I realise and accept now that it wasn't my fault. Although I can use this experience to be more aware for the future when I start dating again. Hopefully soon. I'm swiping and chatting a little, so I'm not completely off the dating
Had to go into the office today for some training, so I got there early and had some time to kill. Took my book and headphones and made use of the dead time by getting through another chapter and one of Andy's podcasts
- Woke up at 04:30 Hrs
- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle-Station οΈ
- Listened to Episode #69 (Lol ) of Andy's Podcast - Day 69: Should You Put Aside Getting Laid During COVID?
With a new 'Scariant' on the way, this is definitely a relevant episode again. The Government recently voted in more draconian Lockdown measures - mandatory vaccinations for health workers, Mandatory masks etc. Although I'm on a break from dating, it's made me realise I can't use things like COVID or past experiences as excuses. Already re-joined Tinder and bought Tinder Gold, so it's a small step. It's a numbers game and eventually I'll meet a decent girl
- Listened to Episode #70 of Andy's Podcast - Day 70: Having Sex in Public When I Didn't Have Good Logistics
Interesting to hear some of these stories. This is something I got into myself when I was a teenager and still living at home. Now I'm older it's not something that I don't do any more as when I was younger, it was out of necessity rather than desire. Also with the job I was working in my late teens and early 20's, I had to behave myself. I know some of the guys enjoy outdoor stuff and I got nothing against it, it just isn't for me
- Read some more of Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender
Yesterday's chapter was on Love. For me this chapter was a bit 'Hippy Dippy' and some of the arguments me personally I found were a bit silly: 'Love Hitler and forgive him and see that he was a victim of the pressures at the time and misguided...'. I'm gonna have to pass on that. My Grandfather saw the horrors of the concentration camps in WW2 and never spoke about what he saw. Bit of a step too far I think. Some things re unforgivable
I did see some of the merits of this chapter however - being loving towards others and radiating positive energy makes sense. I'm a bit sceptical however, as I don't believe in love. It has been compared by scientists to heroin addiction as it's series of chemical reactions in the brain and if there's a lost love like a breakup, the brain patterns and chemical reactions are similar to coming off heroin
- Worked 9-5
Not so bad today. Had to go in the office which was a pain, but I'm pretty much fully trained now so I can just work from home. Cases etc. are rising with this new variant and so they've said 'don't come to work'. Lol. Fine by me - I get to just sit there and listen to podcasts or music. Just gotta turn it off when the phone goes so I don't get in trouble
That's it for today. Gotta go do a food shop, so I'll post this now then go out and get my head down when I come back
Photos have been attached for accountability purposes
Thanks for Reading
Spider π·
Self-reflection
Want to say a big thankyou to Brother_Tucker and Now who had the back and forth with me yesterday on this progress log. I took the opportunity to do some self-reflection after reading the responses last night and during my free time this morning. Slowly coming to a few realisations about what happened recently and I am taking the opportunity to learn from it
I was on a downer for a week or 2 after and this experience did really affect me, but with everyone's help, I'm getting there and working on getting back into the dating
I realise and accept now that it wasn't my fault. Although I can use this experience to be more aware for the future when I start dating again. Hopefully soon. I'm swiping and chatting a little, so I'm not completely off the dating
Had to go into the office today for some training, so I got there early and had some time to kill. Took my book and headphones and made use of the dead time by getting through another chapter and one of Andy's podcasts
- Woke up at 04:30 Hrs
- Had Coffee and Contemplation at my Battle-Station οΈ
- Listened to Episode #69 (Lol ) of Andy's Podcast - Day 69: Should You Put Aside Getting Laid During COVID?
With a new 'Scariant' on the way, this is definitely a relevant episode again. The Government recently voted in more draconian Lockdown measures - mandatory vaccinations for health workers, Mandatory masks etc. Although I'm on a break from dating, it's made me realise I can't use things like COVID or past experiences as excuses. Already re-joined Tinder and bought Tinder Gold, so it's a small step. It's a numbers game and eventually I'll meet a decent girl
- Listened to Episode #70 of Andy's Podcast - Day 70: Having Sex in Public When I Didn't Have Good Logistics
Interesting to hear some of these stories. This is something I got into myself when I was a teenager and still living at home. Now I'm older it's not something that I don't do any more as when I was younger, it was out of necessity rather than desire. Also with the job I was working in my late teens and early 20's, I had to behave myself. I know some of the guys enjoy outdoor stuff and I got nothing against it, it just isn't for me
- Read some more of Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender
Yesterday's chapter was on Love. For me this chapter was a bit 'Hippy Dippy' and some of the arguments me personally I found were a bit silly: 'Love Hitler and forgive him and see that he was a victim of the pressures at the time and misguided...'. I'm gonna have to pass on that. My Grandfather saw the horrors of the concentration camps in WW2 and never spoke about what he saw. Bit of a step too far I think. Some things re unforgivable
I did see some of the merits of this chapter however - being loving towards others and radiating positive energy makes sense. I'm a bit sceptical however, as I don't believe in love. It has been compared by scientists to heroin addiction as it's series of chemical reactions in the brain and if there's a lost love like a breakup, the brain patterns and chemical reactions are similar to coming off heroin
- Worked 9-5
Not so bad today. Had to go in the office which was a pain, but I'm pretty much fully trained now so I can just work from home. Cases etc. are rising with this new variant and so they've said 'don't come to work'. Lol. Fine by me - I get to just sit there and listen to podcasts or music. Just gotta turn it off when the phone goes so I don't get in trouble
That's it for today. Gotta go do a food shop, so I'll post this now then go out and get my head down when I come back
Photos have been attached for accountability purposes
Thanks for Reading
Spider π·