Trèfle
Member
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2023
Barely slept 2 hours, for a reason you could only ever read in this log : I was very curious about what was causing this girl so much pain during sex (only sometimes too) so i spent the night doing some medical research on Google to try and figure it out, pretty sure I found what it was and gained some knowledge along the way. Whether she desires to meet again or not it may be useful information someday
Realized in the morning that I feel really proud about getting laid again after such a tough dry spell, it shows resilience. Kinda wondering if my rate of progress is "good" but it is very subjective isn't it. Regardless, I do feel proud ; 3 lays (and foreplay with a 4th one) isn't much but considering the state of my social skills, all those years in isolation, it's a massive start to me. Maybe someday my log will be a beacon of hope to the guys here who start from the very bottom, it doesn't get worse than a 25 yo manlet with gyno, some speech issues (it gets better and better with practice, I have good vocabulary, but I do still stutter and get people to ask me to repeat what I said, not the most manly thing around), who spent 10 years of his youth depressed in his bed unable to take any action. Well, it probably is almost unreadable with all the nonsense I write but in any case I'll inspire myself. Still a long way to go to achieve my goals, sexual ones, financial ones and everything else but I feel more sure about success now
That said, today wasn't the most interesting day. I can survive on very low sleep but productivity is too much to ask. Spent the morning playing a friendly tennis match with a new partner, really nice guy who seem hardworking def going to play again. Not much else aside from hanging out with my newest friend in the late afternoon, he wanted to show me a bakery that was supposed to be heavenly so I skipped my rice at lunch to anticipate the calorie intake. Probably had a tiny bit too much still, not THAT much, not worth worrying about with all the exercise I do on the side but will need more restraint next time. It really was heavenly
Walked around town talking for a bit, then I went back home and focused on dating apps for a bit but no match today. No big deal, I want a big night of sleep tonight anyway
Oh yeah, worth noting that things are finally over with the virgin chick alas (been like 2 days ? Noticed I didn't add it but seems relevant). Texted her to know if she was coming to my place this Tuesday, she said she didn't want to go past the city center for our next date, I said I really have no interest in going backwards with her and have neutral dates after all the intimate stuff and she just said "I knew we moved too fast, good luck in life". Maybe she is right ? I don't know enough about humankind to know how often guys get to make out 1000 times, fondle breasts for 2 hours, use a sextoy to make her orgasm with virgins on the first date. She said she had foreplay before but I'm the only 1 who got her this turned on on the 1st date, there's pride to be gained in that - and in girls who are truly beautiful like this one and yesterday's date finding me very handsome even this early in my development. I hope I'm not missing any valuable lesson from that experience, mistakes to learn from ? She lamented that I focused too much on her body and not enough on the Netflix movie on the 2nd date, guess that was the turning point. She did have foreplay with several guys without ever having intercourse so idk maybe it would've been too much work ; on the 1st date she talked about how "she'd love for us to become fuckbuddies once I fuck her on the 2nd or the 3rd date" but it's just empty words if there's no fucking yet isn't it. I do wish she was my 4th lay after all this time spent grinding my dick on her butt but oh well, I'll find more girls
Early night to focus on productivity and self improvement work tomorrow
Realized in the morning that I feel really proud about getting laid again after such a tough dry spell, it shows resilience. Kinda wondering if my rate of progress is "good" but it is very subjective isn't it. Regardless, I do feel proud ; 3 lays (and foreplay with a 4th one) isn't much but considering the state of my social skills, all those years in isolation, it's a massive start to me. Maybe someday my log will be a beacon of hope to the guys here who start from the very bottom, it doesn't get worse than a 25 yo manlet with gyno, some speech issues (it gets better and better with practice, I have good vocabulary, but I do still stutter and get people to ask me to repeat what I said, not the most manly thing around), who spent 10 years of his youth depressed in his bed unable to take any action. Well, it probably is almost unreadable with all the nonsense I write but in any case I'll inspire myself. Still a long way to go to achieve my goals, sexual ones, financial ones and everything else but I feel more sure about success now
That said, today wasn't the most interesting day. I can survive on very low sleep but productivity is too much to ask. Spent the morning playing a friendly tennis match with a new partner, really nice guy who seem hardworking def going to play again. Not much else aside from hanging out with my newest friend in the late afternoon, he wanted to show me a bakery that was supposed to be heavenly so I skipped my rice at lunch to anticipate the calorie intake. Probably had a tiny bit too much still, not THAT much, not worth worrying about with all the exercise I do on the side but will need more restraint next time. It really was heavenly
Walked around town talking for a bit, then I went back home and focused on dating apps for a bit but no match today. No big deal, I want a big night of sleep tonight anyway
Oh yeah, worth noting that things are finally over with the virgin chick alas (been like 2 days ? Noticed I didn't add it but seems relevant). Texted her to know if she was coming to my place this Tuesday, she said she didn't want to go past the city center for our next date, I said I really have no interest in going backwards with her and have neutral dates after all the intimate stuff and she just said "I knew we moved too fast, good luck in life". Maybe she is right ? I don't know enough about humankind to know how often guys get to make out 1000 times, fondle breasts for 2 hours, use a sextoy to make her orgasm with virgins on the first date. She said she had foreplay before but I'm the only 1 who got her this turned on on the 1st date, there's pride to be gained in that - and in girls who are truly beautiful like this one and yesterday's date finding me very handsome even this early in my development. I hope I'm not missing any valuable lesson from that experience, mistakes to learn from ? She lamented that I focused too much on her body and not enough on the Netflix movie on the 2nd date, guess that was the turning point. She did have foreplay with several guys without ever having intercourse so idk maybe it would've been too much work ; on the 1st date she talked about how "she'd love for us to become fuckbuddies once I fuck her on the 2nd or the 3rd date" but it's just empty words if there's no fucking yet isn't it. I do wish she was my 4th lay after all this time spent grinding my dick on her butt but oh well, I'll find more girls
Early night to focus on productivity and self improvement work tomorrow