Mav's Log

A bit of improvement. Down to about 157lbs upon waking up, around 160 after eating/drinking in the day. Goal is to have those numbers down by 3 by end of the month.
 
MattsCrib said:
Mav said:
A bit of improvement. Down to about 157lbs upon waking up, around 160 after eating/drinking in the day. Goal is to have those numbers down by 3 by end of the month.
Click to expand...

Yeah I can definitely have nice V. Right now just trying to get to abs. I've put on some muscle for sure in past 2 months. Will start to bulk after I get lean. I do a lot of push-ups, pull-ups, chin-ups, bench, leg press, some squats and so on. Not really any deadlifts or anything like that, especially with my knee taking a hurting from the cardio. Started taking creatine month ago but I already take enough supplements so don't really want to add in whey or anything else. Main goal now is getting lean above all else, of course without losing too much muscle.

Nice progress! :D

Do you do compound movements? It seems like you do a lot of cardio.

You could use some muscle density imo, maybe even use some supplements like protein and or creatine.

You have very narrow hips which is nice to get that v shape showing.
Click to expand...
 
MattsCrib said:
Mav said:
A bit of improvement. Down to about 157lbs upon waking up, around 160 after eating/drinking in the day. Goal is to have those numbers down by 3 by end of the month.
Click to expand...

Nice progress! :D

Do you do compound movements? It seems like you do a lot of cardio.

You could use some muscle density imo, maybe even use some supplements like protein and or creatine.

You have very narrow hips which is nice to get that v shape showing.
Click to expand...

Yeah I can definitely have nice V. Right now just trying to get to abs. I've put on some muscle for sure in past 2 months. Will start to bulk after I get lean. I do a lot of push-ups, pull-ups, chin-ups, bench, leg press, abs, some squats and so on. Not really any deadlifts or anything like that, especially with my knee taking a hurting from the cardio. Started taking creatine month ago but I already take enough supplements so don't really want to add in whey or anything else. Main goal now is getting lean above all else, of course without losing too much muscle.
 
3/15 -

12 Sets

3/16 -

18 Sets
Cardio - Walked 4 Miles

Have been bitching out past week so I got a bit more on track today. Need to double down tomorrow. Secured a decent apartment w/ no roommates with good overall logistics. Only q few minutes drive to work and one minute to the gym. Will also create small home gym so I can workout while watching movies. Two months dry spell, so need to get back on that as well.
 
So tired of being 30 and still having crippling social anxiety that doesnt go away or get better. Makes me feel like an absolute lost cause.
 
Chris from goodlookingloser had a bunch of pure social anxiety tests in this article

https://www.goodlookingloser.com/anxiety/index/a-25-item-checklist-to-measure-your-social-anxiety-do-i-need-professional-help

Worth a look through to see if you can get yourself to a point of completing that list
 
Radical said:
Chris from goodlookingloser had a bunch of pure social anxiety tests in this article

https://www.goodlookingloser.com/anxiety/index/a-25-item-checklist-to-measure-your-social-anxiety-do-i-need-professional-help

Worth a look through to see if you can get yourself to a point of completing that list
Click to expand...

Yeah read this awhile back. I can do a lot of them nervously/awkwardly. Some are easy. Some of them I'd flat out refuse tbh. Think the point of the checklist was to decide if you should get medical help. I wish it was hormonal but it isnt.
 
You need to approach the social anxiety like you did the gym. Persistence and with a plan

I beat mine with exposure therapy

Andy was far worse and got better. I assume you arent agoraphobic like he was based on the fact you can do some of that list and youve dated some girls
 
Radical said:
You need to approach the social anxiety like you did the gym. Persistence and with a plan

I beat mine with exposure therapy

Andy was far worse and got better. I assume you arent agoraphobic like he was based on the fact you can do some of that list and youve dated some girls
Click to expand...

That's the thing though, is that exposure therapy helps a bit for me but not enough. Example, I still have anxiety at work with a very laid back environment Ive been in for years. Still relatively nervous there, stumble over my words, weird mannerisms etc. If I could define one thing I wish was possible, it's to be as comfortable, or at least close, around people as I am hanging out by myself at my house. I'm not agoraphobic but I'm always on high alert, even places I consistently go to like the gym and that feeling doesnt go away untilI get to my car/house.

My brain must just be really fucked up and while I have been a lot more positive recently, I'm not even sure if this is something that can be fixed. One example I gave earlier was a girl at the gym was on the treadmill behind me and a guy I know teaching me how to run better. She makes a comment about it and he starts talking to her with ease. She then tries directly flirting with me and I act as if she doesnt exist. Run into her again later on and she gives me compliments on physique and I screw that up/turned that into a weird interaction, and then the last time she sees me at the gym and says hey, I say hey back and bolt to the leg press lol. Im guessing because I was always caught off guard in these interactions.

I'm not that bad at work, store, or on dates... I mean I slept with three different girls in the past year but could barely utter a syllable to the gym girl lol. Looking back on pictures when I was a kid, it shocked me to see how extroverted I used to be in comparison to now, knowing what went wrong but not how to fix it. Idk it weighs on me, controls my life so much, and makes me miserable to the point where I'm just too tired.
 
I dont really believe in therapy. If I have to hear "why don't you put yourself out there some more and see what happens" I'm going to go off the deep end. Boring, cookie cutter, basic ass youtube video, common sense advice is all I have ever gotten from psychologists with masters degrees, who have been in their field for decades. Most of them don't know shit imo. I'm knocking it for me, not if it helps you or others. I'm pretty introspective and haven't heard anything new from the professionals. Problem is, many of them haven't been through shit and are trying to fix things they only have read about in a book or heard about in seminars. Plus they cost a fortune. I'd be up to trying hypno therapy though.
 
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